Alternative ending
Sweetie shocked up in her bed, sweating more then ever before. The filly started to scream in pure terror and burst out into tears. “Rarity!” was all the little filly could say through her many tears.
The older mare herself, who was peacefully asleep, woke up brutally from the sudden scream in the middle of the night. “What in the world off...Sweetie!” Without a second thought she pushed the blankets of her body and hopped out of her bed. The mare opened the door of her bedroom instantly and galloped towards Sweetie bedroom. She slowed down as the door came in sight and opened it with her magic while fearing for her life of what she might encounter.
As the light of the hallway entered the fillies bedroom, Rarity saw her sister sitting straight up in her bed, looking death terrified. “”S-Sweetie?” The filly perked her ears as the sound of that loving and caring voice, as she slowly turned her head towards her sister.
The filly looked at her sister and Rarity could read the fear in her eyes as she slowly walked up to the her bed. Sweetie looked to Rarity, she saw her sister, the sister she knew and loved. Nothing had changed about her. It was Rarity. The Unicorn carefully sat down on the edge of the bed as her sister just sniffed and sobbed quietly. “Sweetie, did, did you had a nightmare?” the mare asked in her caring tone.
“Y-Yes. May I, ask something?” Sweetie asked shivering.
Rarity smiled warmly under a simple nod. “But of course you may.”
“A-Alright, is there such a thing, as a Unworthy Unicorn, is the Magic Facility real?”
The mare looked in utter confusion to the filly and made her reply to the question. “Sweetie, there is no such thing as that. It was just a nightmare dear. Do you want to sleep in my bed for the rest of the night?”
Sweetie finally turned her attention to Rarity and looked the mare in the eyes. Those sapphire blue irises, did spoke the truth. “Yes sis...” She spoke softly.
“Alright then, come with me.” Rarity spoke as she stood up and waited for Sweetie.
Sweetie got out of her bed and walked with the mare to her grand bedroom where the filly hopped into and curled up in the middle of the bed and used her tail as a pillow. Rarity smiled and crawled back in bed herself. She positioned herself so that she could curl up against her little sister. Using her body warmth to comfort Sweetie, who slowly stopped shivering from fear.
Rarity placed her head next to that of Sweetie and their horns touched each other at the tips. When they touched each other, a couple sparks of green and blue magic emerged and fell down on the bed as both the mare and filly closed their eyes. “Good night Sweetie.” Rarity said as she drifted away back into her dream world.
“Night sis,” replied the filly and within half an hour, both ponies fell asleep peacefully.
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Before you are all going to wonder, this is the a story that has been going through my major re-writing/re-editing. I changed a lot of parts from the story, mostly involving explaining and story flow while trying to cut it loose from its RF origin. The ratings on this story are as they were on the previous version. And there are still any grammatical or structural errors, please, do me a favor and do not point them out... Further more, I would like to point out as a Dutchmare writing in a foreign language, you can not get everything 100% accurate. I thank you kindly for taking this into consideration. ~Rarity
/)>3<(\. So awesome!
*twitch, twitch*
2107210 I assume you did enjoy it.
2107263
I enjoyed it about as much as I would enjoy having my intestines ripped out through my ear.
so, yeah I enjoyed it, quite a lot.
Where has my sanity gone?
Edit: I was being sincere, I actually would enjoy having my intestines ripped out through my ear
2107474 In response to your own question, and you my correct me if I am wring, I think your sanity left your brain and throw itself out of the window, instead of letting somepony else do it for you.
But i am truly glad you did enjoy it.
Well it is a little more enjoyable. But I know it says there will be a sequel. How many stories will there be
2516497 Hmhmhm, I told you that is version was better then the 'original', but yes. There will be a sequel to this story. Two to be exact. At least that is what I have planned, who knows, maybe there are more stories to come in the series.
But for now, The Art of Magic II: Secrecy of the Facility is patiently waiting to see the light of day. I first need to get a couple other things out of the way before releasing that little gem.
1594083 Well, I hadn't read this Neil after the edits; but it's still an awesome story. Even so, I wouldn't fail an escape!
2720796 I am glad that you like it so far my dear. And take this from me, Rarity is only going to get more crazy in the sequel. Maybe not as 'in your face' but more mentally.
About you escaping the place...that is going to be a little touching and puzzling moment actually.
Nice job. Im amazed how far into your stories i get. I seriously just started this one about 20 minutes ago. Good job on being interesting.
4945913 Call it something I really can do well with my stories, create both an interesting plotline and world where it's based in. It's not easy sometimes, but oh so worth it just to hear comments like that. I'm glad that you enjoy it dear.
4947587
On to the sequel.
5785852 It was the main source of inspiration for this story so... I think you can add 2 and 2 together now.
Okay, since you asked I will not point out all the errors and grammatical failures. I'll just say that I could empty a red pen on the two chapters I got through before I couldn't take it anymore.
If you're going to write in English please learn it. "Not my native language" covers a few mistakes in complicated areas. It doesn't cover consistent tense failures, the complete lack of a grasp on sentence structure or not understanding word flow.