- Member Since 29th Aug, 2012
- offline last seen May 26th, 2022
JackTheEpic
Occupation: College Student
JackTheEpic
Joined 29th Aug, 2012 ·
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This sounds interesting. I wonder how he will take certain other students of Celestia besides Twilight who should be here in a decade. It makes me wonder if Sunset Shimmer will be showing up?
This is a very interesting premise. I’ll keep an eye on it. I don’t see if you have a proof reader/editor yet. It might be beneficial to get one later on down the road as I did notice quite a few grammatical errors. Still, I like where this is going. I look forward t seeing how things turn out.
Well he is like a less jerk version of Sunset. I wonder just how he will power up Sunset and how he will change her?
son was replaced with con
9198567
Fixed. Thank you.
Why the cocaine? To me it just seems like an odd choice as a chemical to make ir keep.
Well I think Celestia has taken a look at just what he has been up to. I think she fully intended for Sunset to go the route of Twilight but since Moonshadow prevented the rift due to Sunset’s ego she is a bit miffed. Let's see how he handles Celestia and if he can show her what he and Sunset can do together.
9201956
Why not?
At least this one had reason to the reincarnation, I liked the nice touch on having a sort of "Administrator" that oversaw reincarnation, and kudos to understanding that reincarnation as a soul is a process that is unbound and transcends the concept of following a linear time flow. I mean really, he had options to go to the far future and back again to the past but he got lucky with an interested power to sponsor the MC.
There are some gripes, plenty of "i" showing up, here's one from the very beginning
With the established fact that the "OP-ness" of the MC's convenient knowledge grants him, can be explained as a clerical error or a requirement to his sponsorship, in potentially galvanizing the growth of Equestria and the world. Typical isekai stories from asian novelizations, usually had this as one of the main reasons to bring in reincarnators. That or killing/sealing a great evil or being used as a pawn for conquest.
More please?
You even took the time to make a map of the quarter's layout, planning something with that or is it just to keep track of character movements when story takes place there. Either way, it's appreciated.
9202002
Thank you for the kind words. I went back and fixed the punctuation and spelling mistakes in the chapter Rebirth.
Time has almost shifted dramatically. Sunset grew up humbled, without the ego of a bitch and is actually quite happy. Though, the price for that is Celestia losing a vital asset for the future before Twilight comes up to take her place. Unless she losses her too to the MC's fame and promise of knowledge.
It is funny though, the MC is unintentionally preparing the country's defenses with his research, "discoveries" and inventions. It's to the point that, unless he's brought into the know by Celestia, every other threat besides Nightmare Moon and Discord, will be easily dealt with.
Ehh celestia never did do proper teaching. You snoze you lose. Better luck next time celestia
How was this sentence supposed to end?
Continent.
Might want to remove that.
This is really interesting and I’m looking forward to seeing where this is going, especially with all the inventions and patents he’s making. I have to wonder where you’re going with all that condsidering that Equestria isn’t a militaristic nation. Looking forward to seeing how Celestia handles loosing Sunset.
9203226
Fix it. Made a mistake from my second edit.
9203275
Fixed
9203342
More please
And with my liking of this story, it has a 10:1 ratio, Yay
"our new home" smooth. Flash got game, and with a germane accent who can say no.
One minor fix is needed. When Sunset is explaining to Celestia why she wants to stop being her student at no point in that paragraph is she ever identified as the speaker.
I wonder how long it will take before these two decided to head to the chapel? They are perfect for bedside one another.
Inches.
Make allowances or may allow.
Inches.
Nice to see a fic where Sunset and Flash work. Really looking forward to seeing what happens next.
More please
9207887
Errors fixed. Thank you for spotting them.
Well, I have to say, I'm a bit, disappointed? Yes, that's the word.
I didn't mind the small to moderate time skips at first, I just think that it was a wasted opportunity to slow down the pace. The MC and Sunset were already well into their twenties, they moved into a town where they became celebrities overnight, after their land purchase stimulated the infrastructure and public works.
To then just hash over several years as if they were nothing and made the two appear as hermits.
No chance for life, no character developments, just cliff notes to accomplishments. The MC is nearing his 30's, this story is Mature rated, and there is a sex tag but if you're telling me this story is going to see that near anyone from the Mane 6, who're all around just entering or around the legal age, that's fucked up.
I'm still going to follow along, to see where this goes.
now things are heating up
I would feel sorry for Nightmare Moon, if she probably couldn’t stop the tank. She may be surprised but I doubt that she will loose that much of a magical advantage.
But I stopped after 3 steps.
Assistant.
Alright.
Juicy.
Great chapter. Looking forward to more.
9215388
Fixed. Thanks!
So, Henschel version if Tiger II?
9227748
yes
9211107
The time skip was maybe a but much. However, the mane six are in 1000 adults that have been out on their own for several years.
Rainbow has been promoted at work, pinkie has been at the cakes a while, rarity has a successful business. Both rarity and apple jack are considered to be mature enough to take on a motherhood role for extended periods. Shining armor, who is only several years older is captain, which is several promotions in.
Thinner.
I’ve actually started to feel that way about the recent songs in the show.
I really hope Moonshadow is all right. I'd hate for him to have to be resurrected again.
*sniff sniff* COCAINE!
9240861
Nah, he will be alright but loose a portion of his memories of his past lives. However I think he has enough written down he will not be at that bad of a disadvantage. Now I wonder if this will start his relationship with Sunset?
It’s not like that wall was load bearing or anything.
How do you know he loses some memories?
Oh boy I hope more comes out soon!
Oh I can’t wait till the next chapter
Update?
9367255
Soon.
It’s all good, just like your story
Well that could have gone worse. Now I wonder just what has happened to the tank since it's deposit in the forest?
I hope you haven't made the pink pony addicted to crack or whatever. That'd be a real dick move.
Yay! Young love! I can't wait to see what happens when Discord breaks free and the Changeling invasion happens.
Honestly.