Original Works. It was a good run.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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This was very enjoyable. I'd love to see some more of this.
My only criticism is it could use a quick once over. There are a number of errors I noticed, spelling mostly, though a few missed words here and there. Also, there were a few times it was hard to tell who was who.
Your clop is an absolute delight, as per usual.
Positive, the description of the activities is pretty good. It's an entertaining read for what happens.
My biggest criticism, however, is the character's behavior. Rainbow was decent, although she was quicker to forgive than I would have liked, but she was the only one. Twilight's behavior was completely out of character, not really showing any interest in her friends feelings, caring only for herself and her pleasure. It made her unlikable, and made the dom-sub relationship a little questionable to me. Dash, however, had essentially no personality. She was basically just there for her breasts. Dash basically could have been replaced with a sex doll or pillow, and nothing would have been different.
Quite sexy. :D
That was nice, and I can see the potential.
My one critique is that it felt like I was reading one chapter out of a larger story, and had no way of getting caught up.
Yeah … that was over far too quickly for how ambitious it was trying to be. Feels incomplete.