- Member Since 25th Jan, 2012
- offline last seen Saturday
Yukito
Trixie and Twilight are best ponies! (Diamond Tiara is best filly :D )
Yukito
Joined 25th Jan, 2012 ·
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Well that was... definitely a thing that just happened.
I was about to say that RD needs a chapter too, but I see you're on it.
Yeaaaah, fics that use rape as a joke are RARLEY well received. It’s a touchy subject and while it CAN make funny jokes, MLP and those kind of jokes REALLY don’t mix well.
Excellent. :D And yay for Dashie chapter. Any chance of Trixie getting in on this, too?
I liked it, but I'm going to give some unsolicited advice because I think a future Rainbow Dash chapter could be even better.
The dialogue was good, every bit of it, but I feel like there could have been more description of the action to go with that dialogue. It could have been at least double this length without even adding them doing anything else. Also because you focused on dialogue without description, we didn't get a lot of Pinkie Pie. If it's supposed to be rape, describing how the victim is reacting is important. Her reactions were vague enough that if I hadn't read 'rape' in the description, I wouldn't have realized it was rape. Maybe I missed something, but it felt more like 'surprise sex' with Pinkie really only being mad that she was left tied up. Of course that might have been the point too, but it'd be move obvious if it was or wasn't with some more descriptive text. Think 'show don't tell'
But again i definitely liked it and will be looking forward to another chapter. I'm not sure why the votes are lower than your other stuff, but please don't let that keep you from writing more similar fun things. Only care what people think of your writing when they're paying you for it.
8895151
This was a joke? I thought it was meant to be hot. Shows how weird I am I guess.
8895236
That happens every time I read a fic that makes a cursory mention of spanking.
Don't get why so many downvotes. You have my thumbs up and fav. Great random little clopfic.
8895306
When a story has a theme like this, people often read the description and downvote without even reading it. It's childish but can't be helped I suppose.
it was alright... there wasn't really a story, but I don't suppose that was what you were going for... instead, I read it for the shock value and while there were a few things that I found odd like lyre cumming as many times and as fast as she did, it lived up to what expectations I had. so good job on that. I don't think this DESERVED as many down votes as it got but with how stingy the people on this site can be, I'm not surprised... you get a like from me though, so well played.
Normally I wouldn't rate this story, because while it was decent, it wasn't great. There were more than a few flaws and Warmachine below covered most of them (also that family guy reference? really?) But, since too many people are being unfair here, I will upvote in an effort to close the gap.
You have potential, and I think you'll get gradually better as you continue to write, so don't give up! I personally like these kinds of stories.
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Well tbf, surprise sex is still rape if consent is never established XD
But yeah, I get what you're saying. This was only a quick, shameless smut-piece though. Not really the type of fic where I delve into the psychological aspects :P
What are the odds this rape is just Diamond Tiara's once used definition of rape on the CMC?
Time to find out.
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i.imgur.com/Z7xoXmh.jpg
9155939
403 forbidden error on pic.
9156133
Fixed :P
9155939
That's what I picture your expression to be 2/3 of a given day. xD
Never turn one's back on the Yukito.
That's a title that sticks out.