Gizmo in the Box

Jake The Army Guy's Horse Words Extravaganza56 stories ·100 members

Whoa Nelly buys a personal digital assistant to help her manage her hectic life. The last thing she expected was for Gizmo to become part of her life.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 8 )

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Veo Skride

Veo Skride #1 · Jul 1st, 2017 · · ·

Was this that idea I gave you?

Dafaddah

Dafaddah #2 · Jul 1st, 2017 · · ·

Dawwwww! So cute!

Zyrian

Zyrian #3 · Jul 1st, 2017 · · ·

That was cute. I like how you gave reasoning and purpose to Whoa's size.

SIGAWESOME

SIGAWESOME #4 · Jul 1st, 2017 · · ·

He’s such a figure snob. It’s always ‘You gotta cut up or shut up! Yeah!’ with him.

Mitch H

Mitch H #5 · Jul 2nd, 2017 · · ·

I don't understand your employer's business model, Gizmo. Are you sure this isn't just a really oblique K-type pick-up artist gambit?

FanOfMostEverything

FanOfMostEverything #6 · Jul 6th, 2017 · · ·

Nice work. I love your explanation for Nelly's most noticeable feature, and the romance really does work well. The nature of the PerDi makes a lot of sense by the end, and you drop nicely subtle hints along the way. My only complaint is that action scenes are very sparse, and you spend a lot of time explaining a simple tournament bracket. Aside from that, lovely stuff.

Thank you for this, and best of luck in the judging.

MidnightFMare