Oh, look at me... you've got me tearing up again. ◈ Forget about coffee buy me a cup noodle.
Twilight stole a statue. Not just any statue, though, for it was the Sacred Totem of Amazingly Rad Epicness, or S.T.A.R.E. for short.
Also, she doesn't really give a crap about it. So there's that.
Rewritten from the story "Thief" with permission from Evictus. I took it as a personal challenge to see what I could do with a story that has far more dislikes than likes. 
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Spike hallucinating from eating crystals.......
I think that cavern was crystal meth if you ask me.
20/10 Even better than Past Sins.
Haha! That punch line! I didn't expect it at all. I gave ya a like.
Thanks for rewriting it!
8022703 No probs.
Better than the original, at least.
8022786
8022786
I would hope so.
8022808 yup.
8022717 :)
8022827
8022897 It was better than mine to. I wish mine were good I'm at the point of quitting. :(
8022902 Don't give up! Grab a book or two on writing! There's always the chance to improve, you just gotta take it the first chance you get!
8022934 A book like a writing guide? Yeah I could get one of those. Or the guides about writing on this site. I know it would be bad to give up but I don't know. Thank you though I know that there is a chance for me to improve and I just need to use that chance
8022956 I've seen plenty of writing guides in libraries and schools.
8022956
try writing comedy.
8023022 I'll try to do that
Pretty brilliant. Liked, faved.
8022967 I'll check them out then
Well, TheMajorTechie, you have managed the impossible. You have successfully polished a turd. You also made it genuinely hilarious.
To be absolutely fair to The Story Writer, "Thief" is one of his less-bad attempts. He's written far worse.
For what it's worth, I have also taken The Story Writer's "writing" as a challenge, though I ended up going in a completely different direction with it. I am simultaneously sorry yet not.
Okay story...
90% better than the original.
Without further ado I present thee with thy award.
s31.postimg.org/5f1za22sr/KHq_gif.jpg
whats l-o-g-i-c? its new to me.
8024560 It is... something.
8025327 thats very vague.
8025959 As are the goings of life, the passage of time, and the workings of the universe. Vague. Nothing may truly be certain unless said certainty may be confirmed, either through direct observation, or by the means of forcing a single event's happening by one's own hand. The universe is therefore everything, and at the same time, nothing.
Want a potato?
8025975 i like potatos
8023036 Definitely start with comedy - or at least something light-hearted.
What even is this?
Where even is this?
When even is this?
How even is this?
Why even is this?
Who even is this?
Who even is I?
Is I even Who?
Why is even who i how what this when?
Damen.exe has stopped responding
Please leave a message after the beep
8035267 *snerk*
Give or take a handful of nanoseconds. And picoseconds. Can't forget those.
8035402 Yup
8035079 I'll do that
Lol a banana suit
8057636 Yup.
8057662 XD
8057667
8057678 There's also a video of Celestia in a banana suit as well
8057682 That was my inspiration for the chapter.
8057705 Lol I thought so!
Can I link this version to the original?
8131819 Sure.
8131906 Thanks!
8131947 yup.
8131951 :)
No reason needed! None at all!
8446996
Yeah.
8447061
In this rewrite I basically just took the basic plotline and added my usual one-shot absurd-randomness twist to it. Other than that, I mostly kept the same plot.
8447132
yup.