"It is better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self." - Cyril Connolly
Page generated in 0.073 seconds
Total duration
1,024 users online
1,329,395 hits today, 2,439,861 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Whoo, boy, this was hot. A little awkward on some of the mechanics (occasionally took a few moments to figure out who was doing what (or whom)) and I'm never a fan of switching POVs mid-scene, but this was very hot. A couple points -- There's a formatting issue where all the text goes bold until the end of the story, and you should probably hint at the contents a little with some tags. Nothing in the description suggested an orgy in a Las Pegasus strip club or Dash tonguing AJ. The only other criticism I have is there was plenty of opportunity to lay the groundwork for how it was gonna go near the start -- maybe mention somehow during their day of chores that RD was used to rougher sex or something -- get the anticipation building a little earlier, you know?
But super hot. Favorite, Like, +1, etc.
7833415 It's still got that formatting error!? Grrr...
Thanks for the feedback, I really appreciate it. I don't have an editor, so I have to rely on the comments ^^;
Eh, I feel like AJ took her revenge a BIT too far, especially after Dash's apology.