Chapter 2.
In the Sickbay of the USS Voyager, Twilight appears to controlled pandemonium. One human is on one of the beds, his uniform shredded, his body burned. Another human is working on him, trying to get him to calm down as he writhes in pain. The standing human reaches over and grabs a device, and with a soft hissing sound, the man on the bed relaxes into unconsciousness. Twilight trots up to the standing human, “Excuse me, sir.” She says.
“Get me the dermal regenerator.” He snaps.
She flinches back, after a moment, he huffs, “A dermal regenerator, it’s in that cabinet,” he points without looking. Twilight moves over to the cabinet and unfurls her wings to get added height. Her horn lights and the cabinet opens. The device flies over and slaps into the outstretched hand of the other human, he growls, “Thanks. At least someone knows how to be efficient.”
Twilight folds her wings and trots up to him, it looks like the immediate danger has passed, “What happened?” She asks softly.
“The ship has been boarded, Lieutenant Malloy here was able to initiate an emergency beam out. Though more casualties will be incoming, I need to get him taken care of quickly before more arrive.”
“More?” Twilight feels the butterflies in her stomach, “I need to get to Naomi.”
“I’m a Doctor, not a directory, ask the computer where she is.”
Twilight looks at the exit, “I did, but as a hologram, I can’t just walk to her, I’m looking for someone to help me.”
He stops what he’s doing for a moment, then he looks at her, “You are a hologram too?” He walks over to her, “You aren’t any matrix I recognize, what are you doing in my sickbay?”
Her eyes widen, “So you are stuck where there are holo-emitters as well?”
He shakes his head, “No. I have a mobile emitter, I am not bound to the sickbay, I can go anywhere on the ship.” He points to the device sitting on his desk, “I can even leave the ship if I so choose. But none of that matters, who are you and what are you doing here?”
She again unfurls her wings and leaps over to the desk, her magic grabs the small device and she inspects it quickly.
The Doctor steps forward, “Hey, you aren’t allowed to have that, put it back down.” He growls.
She puts the emitter against her skin behind her ear and it sticks, she can feel her essence drain into the device, and she smiles brightly, “I’ll bring it back!” She shouts as she gallops for the door. The door opens and she slides through as she makes the turn into the corridor. She skids to a stop, her rump landing on the deck. “Computer.”
The computer responds with a chirp, “Is Naomi still in turbolift three?”
Again, a few chirps from the computer, “Negative, Naomi Wildman is in her quarters on deck six.”
“How do I get there?”
The computer takes a moment to respond, “Follow the lit path to the turbolift, then continue following the path until you reach the destination.” Along the wall a bar lights up, with brighter lights running down the indicated direction. Twilight dashes off and soon finds herself at the turbolift. She looks into the small room, and finally shrugs her wings as she steps into it. The doors close and it moves off, quickly stopping one deck down. The door opens and she pokes her head out, noting the lighted path showing to her right. Instead of a mad dash, she walks more cautiously down the corridor. She turns a corner and stops, her wings spreading in surprise. There are four creatures in the corridor. The light path ends at a door right where the creatures are. She takes a step forward.
“Whatever that is, get it!” Comes a voice from the creatures. They raise what look like weapons and Twilight’s eyes go wide, her horn lights as they fire. She gets her shield to form as the beams from the weapons slam into it. The concussive blast of the beams blow her back into the bulkhead. She shakes her head and watches the soldiers work together to advance towards her, two would move forward, then provide cover for the other two as they advance.
“You have magic.” She growls, “Well, I have magic too.” She charges her horn and fires a concussive beam at them. The beam hits one of the soldiers, and it doesn’t even push him back. She frowns and fires again, to the same effect, then she has to hastily throw up a shield to defend against another blast from the soldiers. “Well, that isn’t working.” She turns and gallops down the corridor, she has to get to Naomi. Two more humans appear, with the same uniform as Tom, but the shoulders of this uniform is a mustard yellow. They are carrying similar looking devices as the invaders. She flashes past them and skids around the corner heading down another side corridor. Behind her she hears shouts and the sound of the invaders weapons, as well as a different sound of weapons fire. She stops and looks behind her, one of the soldiers rolls and fires his weapon at her. She leaps to the side and turns to run down the corridor.
She makes another turn and sees that she’s in the same corridor as Naomi’s room. She barrels over to it, and slides to a stop as it doesn’t open for her. She bangs on the door, not getting a response, those soldiers are almost into this corridor, and they would know where she went. She closes her eyes and lights her horn, time for an old fashion teleport. It feels different as it happens, but she opens her eyes and looks around.
“Twilight!” Comes Naomi’s voice, “What are you doing here?”
Twilight runs over and tackles Naomi, nuzzling her fiercely, “The ship has been boarded, we need to get out of here.”
“But you are a holodeck program, you can’t leave the holodeck.” Naomi says, her face showing her confusion, “How are you here?”
“The Doctor’s mobile emitter, at least that’s what he called it. I ran into the invaders trying to get to you, and I used magic on them, but I couldn’t do anything to stop them.”
Naomi frowns, “The holodeck has safety programs, to make it impossible for you to hurt anyone.”
Twilight smiles, “Naomi, I would never hurt you, but I need to stop them, can those safety programs be taken off?”
Naomi nods, still a little unsure. Twilight smiles, she again lights her horn and speaks with Tom’s voice, “Computer, disable safety protocols on program Twilight Sparkle.”
Naomi gapes as the computer responds, “Acknowledged.”
Twilight grins and fires a beam at a vase, which explodes, she turns to Naomi, “Thank you.” She moves over and hugs Naomi, “Now, let’s get you to safety.”
“Where is that?”
Twilight huffs, “I have no idea, but we need to get away from here.”
Naomi stops for a moment, “Mommy said that there’s a designated safe area, it’s the mess hall.”
Twilight smiles, “Sounds good to me, where is it?”
“Deck Two.”
Twilight growls, “Four decks up.” She shakes her head, “Well, come with me, I’ll protect you.” She moves over to the door, she closes her eyes and lights her horn, Naomi’s eyes widen as the entire wall becomes transparent to them. She comes over and places a hand on the alicorn’s withers.
“Can they see us?” She points at the two Hirogen that are walking down the corridor.
Twilight shakes her head, “No, it’s a clairvoyance spell. Something in the walls themselves are responding to the spell and showing us the other side of the walls.”
Naomi blinks and tilts her head for a moment, “Like the ships sensors? The internal sensors!”
Twilight watches the soldiers turn the corner, “Okay, let’s go, quickly now.” The doors open and they dash through them into the corridor, Twilight turns away and starts to gallop. “Quickly, Naomi.” She whispers fiercely, after a few moments she notices that Naomi is not able to run as fast as she can. She lights her horn again and gently picks up Naomi, placing the girl on her back. Naomi wraps her arms around Twilight as she resumes her gallop. She slides to a stop at the intersection of one corridor with another. She glances down the corridor and then rushes down as she sees it’s empty. Another sliding turn and she is at the turbolift alcove. A wing is extended to press the pad to call the car. Twilight turns broadside to the turbolift door so she can easily see back in the corrider, her ears flicking constantly to listen for the heavy footfalls of the soldiers.
The lift’s doors open and a loud gasp from Naomi gets her attention. She jerks to look inside the turbolift, two Hirogen soldiers are standing there. Without wasting any time, Twilight’s horn lights, and she simply grabs the two soldiers with her magic, flinging them through the air as far as she can manage. She leaps into the turbolift, firing concussive blasts at the soldiers as they gain their feet and rush towards the closing door of the turbolift. As the door shuts, Twilight heaves a massive breath and calls out, “Deck two, Mess Hall.”
The lift obediently responds. First jerking to the side, then it rises a single deck. The door opens as the lift stops, Twilight’s horn is charged and ready, though there are no surprises this time. Twilight walks cautiously down the hallway, Naomi shifting her weight to tell Twilight the direction to go. Finally they see an obviously barricaded door, tables and benches are on their sides as a physical barrier.
“There’s one, fire!” Comes a voice from the barricade.
Twilight barely gets a shield up before a blast reaches out to them, she shouts, “Stop firing! I’m friendly. I’ve got Naomi with me!”
“Naomi?” Come’s Neelix’s voice. His head pops up, “Who are you?”
Twilight growls, “We can wait on introductions, I’m coming in.” She gallops towards the barricade, unfurling her wings in the tight space, she leaps into the air and executes a tight turn through the door, she skids to a stop, her horn lighting and a shield forming around the barricade, “I think that should hold, for a little while.” She sighs.
Neelix kneels down next to Naomi as she clambers off Twilights back, “Naomi, how did you get a character from your program here?”
Naomi shakes her head, “She appeared in my room. I have no idea.”
Neelix whirls on Twlight, “You are a holo-simulation, how can you be out here?”
Twilight huffs, “Seriously? Do I have to explain to everypony?” She moves her mane to the side, “I borrowed the doctor’s mobile emitter, I’m here to protect Naomi.”
“Here they come!” Comes a couple of voices from the barricade. Along with the whine of weapons fire.
Neelix looked own at Twilight then at the door. “This isn’t a safe place for Naomi, you need to take her someplace safe.”
“But I don’t know enough about this ship, the computers been telling me where to go but…” Twilight looks at Naomi.
Crewman Kenneth Dalby walks over and kneels, “I have an idea, can I see the emitter for a moment.”
Tentatively, Twilight looks at Naomi and Neelix.
“He’s pretty smart, and he’s part of the engineering staff.” Neelix says and nods to Twilight.
Kenneth taps the panel on the mobile emitter, “Computer, download ships schematics and personnel files to the mobile emitter, integrate into memory files of the Twilight Sparkle program.”
The computer chirps a few times, “Transfer complete.”
Twilight gasps as the data fills her mind, she turns and looks at Neelix, “This area is going to get overwhelmed, Naomi!” She shouts and dashes over to the young lady, “We need to get into the Jeffries tubes.”
Neelix watches dumbfoundedly as Twilight rushes towards a bulkhead, and her magic yanks open the hatch. She crawls in and waits for Naomi before she closes the hatch behind her. She finds the access tubes are tall enough for her to walk with her head down, and Naomi puts her hand on Twilights back as she bends down to walk. Twilight walks for a bit, getting away from the mess hall, “This is bad, so very bad.” She moans. “What are we going to do?”
Naomi tightens her grip on Twilight, “I don’t know, it’s happening so fast. We need to slow them down, or knock them out.”
“Knock them out! You are a genius, Naomi!” She sits down and gestures for Naomi to sit with her, “We are safe for now, let’s see if we can get the ship to help us.” She glances at the computer terminal at the junction, she reaches out a wing to tap the com button, “Twilight Sparkle to sickbay.”
“Sickbay.” Comes the terse response.
“Doctor, we need to stop the Hirogen, I need to put anesthizine gas into the ventilation system, it should knock out the soldiers.”
The doctor tsks, “Sorry, but anesthizine will not affect the Hirogens, their armor will prevent any chemical agent from fully affecting all of them. And it will have the added effect of knocking out all of the crew, so it will make the soldier’s jobs a lot easier.”
Twilight growls, “There has to be some way to stop them.”
A feminine voice comes over the com channel, “We can try an old Maquis trick. When Cardassians would board a ship, we would overload the plasma conduits with a phased plasma pulse. In essence, every plasma conduit all over the ship would become a stun level phaser.”
The Doctor comes back over the channel, “B’Elanna, you are too severely injured right now.” Twilight and Naomi hear a sound of a struggle, then the hiss of a hypospray becomes audible over the connection, “I had to sedate her or she would have hurt herself more. Did you catch all of what she said?”
Twilight smiles, “Yes, Doctor.”
“Then you need to head to main engineering. But remember, you have my mobile emitter, I want it back in the same shape you got it, understood?”
She giggles, “Of course Doctor, Twilight out.”
Twilight looks around and finds a hatch leading down, “Well, Naomi, let’s get going.”
Naomi moves over and starts to climb down the ladder, “Where are we going?”
“Main engineering on deck eleven. Let’s go.”
Naomi rolls her eyes, “I know where main engineering is.”
“I know you do, let’s hurry.
***
Twilight crouches in the Jefferies tube, one hoof on the access hatch to main engineering deck. She takes a long moment to catch her breath. There are two of those creatures in the compartment. One by the console and one by the core, both are armed though. She knows where they are, her ‘magic’ lets her see through the bulkhead, she just has to do something about them. She leans back to murmur in Naomi’s ear, “I’m going to go out there and take care of them. Wait for me to tell you it’s safe, got it?”
Naomi nods silently and moves back against the side of the junction as Twilight’s horn lights. She reaches back with a hoof and slams it forward, knocking the hatch across the room. Twilight turns to her left and fires off a concussion beam, knocking the first soldier into the bulkhead, shattering a display and denting the bulkhead itself. She then launches into the air, firing continuously at the soldier on the second level of engineering. She hits him twice in the chest, but the big Hirogen shoulders his rifle firing a blast at her.
She flips in mid air, doing a wingover like Rainbow Dash had taught her and rears up, firing a more powerful blast. This shot sends him staggering backwards to the rail. Before he can slump to the ground, she barrels into him, sending him flying over the banister. His body flying off the catwalk onto the floor.
The first Hirogen has recovered, however, and picks up his weapon and points it towards the Jefferies tube. Shock and rage fill Twilight as she can see him starting to pull the trigger.
“NO!” Twilight yells and let’s loose a powerful blast that causes the rifle he's holding to explode in his hands, his burned body slowly slumps to the floor. She lands, her sides heaving, she grabs the soldier near her and drags his body towards where the other soldier lies.
“Okay, Naomi, come on out.” She says, while trying to get her breathing back under control. She rears up at the engineering status board and starts typing with her wings. She uses her forelegs to brace herself while she reads the outputs on the display.
Naomi comes up next to her, “Are they dead?”
Twilight focuses on the control panel, she can't stop the tears in her eyes, “I had to stop them, they would have hurt you and the crew.”
“You didn’t answer my question Twilight." Naomi says flatly, "Are they dead?”
Twilight stops for a moment, looking at her, “I... Didn’t want to, they just wouldn’t stop... I did what I had to. I needed to keep you safe, they would have killed you without a second of hesitation.”
Naomi stomps her foot, “Twilight Sparkle, you don’t kill. Killing is wrong.” She shouts, tears flowing down her face, “You promise me.” She sobs softly, “You’ll never kill again.”
Twilight stops and sits, her head low in front of the console, slowly she looks at the two bodies, then at Naomi, her own emotions bubble to the surface, “I’m sorry.” Twilight sobs, “I’ve just been so concerned for you, and all of you on this ship. Those creatures are wrong, they shouldn’t be here.” She reaches over and hugs Naomi, “But Naomi, I can’t promise I will never kill again, I will do anything in my power to protect you. I tried not to, I’ll do everything possible not to kill. I just can’t let you get hurt, is that okay?”
Naomi spends a long moment hugging Twilight, “Mom has said it gets pretty dangerous here in the Delta Quadrant. Only if it’s me or them, got it?”
Twilight nods, she rears up again and starts on the computer keypads. She looks across the panel and taps a pad, a moment later the Doctor's image appears on the screen. “I’m almost done.”
“Good, now be careful, this is going to overload some systems. This could be exceedingly dangerous. You’re not connected to the holodeck now, and if this overloads the emitter, your program could be lost forever.” The Doctor says, “Remember you promised to bring it back undamaged.”
With a slow nod, she wipes her muzzle, dealing with the occasional sniffle and snort as she blinks away tears. “I know…” She taps another pad and the Doctor's face disappears from the screen, to be replaced with a status board.
She’s silent for a long time as she finishes her work, “it’s fine. I just seem to be bad with promises today.”
Finally, she turns and gives a watery smile to Naomi, “I’m ready.”
“Wait, what did he mean about your program being lost?!?” Naomi asks slowly walking towards Twilight.
Shaking her head, Twilight lights her horn, “He said there was a chance. You’re my friend and I’m going to protect you, no matter what.” Her magical aura forms around Naomi.
Naomi stops, putting her hands against the shield, “Twilight wait. I don’t want you hurt either!” She watches as the alicorn silently turns and again rears up to the console. Naomi looks around, and finally starts pounding on the shield with her hand, “There’s got to be a safer way.”
Twilight sighs, "This is the best way to protect you, Naomi," she says softly as she presses a final button, a loud screech of increasing power fills the air throughout the ship. Sparks fly from several consoles, causing Twilight to flinch and duck. The warp core hums and pulses, then bright lights flash from every plasma conduit aboard the ship. In a matter of seconds everything living is down, leaving only the Doctor, Naomi, and Twilight still conscious.
The magic fades from around Naomi, who walks towards Twilight with tears in her eyes, then she sees the hologram starting to flicker a few times. She starts to run to Twilight, who visibly wobbling. “Twilight.”
“Go to the Doctor, start waking people up so the soldiers…” With a fizzing sound, she fades away and the emitter bounces on the deck.
Naomi falls to her knees and picks up the mobile emitter, tears in her eyes. "Twilight..." Wiping her own face with an arm she turns and runs for the sickbay.
***
Naomi rushes through the door to sickbay, “Doctor!” She screams, “She’s dead!” She shouts through her tears.
“Naomi, how are you conscious? That was a pretty heavy stun blast.” The doctor says as she hands the emitter to him.
She looks at the emitter, “She used her magic to shield me, at the expense of herself.” She sobs, tears flowing down her cheeks.
“I’ll have B’Elanna check her out, but I need you to get to the bridge, wake every crew member you see as you head there.” He tosses her a hypospray. She catches it, looking stunned.
“I know this is rough for you Naomi, but if the mobile emitter is shorted out I can’t use it to go and help the crew. Since you are the only biologically alive member of the crew still moving, I need you to work on reviving the crew. Everyone here is too injured right now. But I’ll get people coming to help you as soon as possible.
“What about the soldiers?”
The Doctor sighs, “They should be knocked out for at least an hour, maybe longer. Twilight set the blast as strong as she could without killing anyone, any higher and people could have been badly hurt or killed. That probably why she shielded you, it let her set the blast high enough to knock the Hirogen out without killing you. But we need to get security personnel roused so they can strip them of their armor and put them into the brig until Captain Janeway decides what to do with them. And once you find security personnel, give them more hyposprays to help wake up the crew.” He grabs several more hyposprays and programs them quickly.
Naomi grabs a shoulder carry container and dumps the half dozen devices inside then heads out the door. She finds four Hirogen lying on the deck right outside the turbolift. She sighs as she steps over the bodies and calls for a turbolift. Inside are two members of security, she quickly presses her hypospray to their necks as she waits for the lift to head sideways before it heads up to the bridge. The security members take their own sprays as she steps onto the bridge, she knows who to revive first.
She presses the spray against the neck of the captain and presses the button, a soft hiss filling the air. After a few moments, Janeway’s eyes flutter open, she turns her head and focuses on Naomi.
Janeway blinks several times, clearing up afterimages, “Miss Wildman, what happened?”
Naomi sniffles a bit, “Twilight was able to stop them from down in engineering.” She says softly as she starts to revive Chakotay. As he shakes his head and looks around, she moves to press her spray against Tom’s neck.
Janeway can see the tears in the young girls eyes, "Twilight? Who's Twilight?"
Sniffling, Naomi moves over to Tom, "She's a character from the holoprogram Tom made for me. She got out of the holodeck and borrowed the doctors mobile emitter to save me." She lowers her head, her voice cracking as she continues, "She gave her life to protect me. To save the ship."
Janeway looks at Tom for a long moment, “I’ll deal with your programming later.” She says softly, “For now, help Naomi get the crew revived, and let’s get those Hirogen locked up.”
***
Captain’s log: Supplemental
The surviving Hirogen have been loaded back into their little Trojan horse and set adrift with food and supplies. They should have plenty of time to think about what they have done while waiting for Hunter ships to pick them up. We've left a buoy to both warn other ships as well as to act as a beacon for hunting parties. These hunters were not aware of the truce with Voyager so may have some interesting explaining to do when they are picked up.
Now on a more personal issue. Tom Paris has apparently done some exceptional programming with some of the characters of his holographic program for young Naomi Wildman. B'Ellana Torres has been spending the last few hours in the holodeck working on restoring the program.
Janeway walks into the programming alcove for the holodeck. Tom and B’Elanna are both bent over the console. The Doctor’s mobile emitter is sitting on the desk before them. And the Doctor himself is pacing back and forth.
“How long?” The doctor asks testily, “Will you be working on that?”
B’Ellana picks up the emitter and picks up a tiny screwdriver, “I’m working to access its memory, it might be a small short in the device itself. If I can fix it, we can empty it’s programming and then you can have it back.” She pulls out two small screws and pulls off the cover. She grabs a magnifier and starts going over the visible circuitry.
Janeway moves over to Tom, “How did a holoprogram get self aware enough to do what she did?”
Tom blushes faintly, “Well, I wanted her to bond with Naomi quickly, because she’d be a teacher for her, through the life lessons the show was all about. The programming was actually quite difficult, so I added some parts from the doctor’s matrix into her programming. She was the one that held the entire cast together, she had to be the strongest mentally, not working off a script, but learning and adapting to Naomi and the situation on the fly. I did the most with Twilight, but many of those elements are in all the main characters of the story. That’s why it took me months of work.”
Janeway frowns, “So you built her as an adaptive heuristic program? Learning and adapting to situations?”
Tom nods.
“Wait a moment!” The Doctor moves up to Tom, “You used my programming? For a purple quadruped?”
Janeway smiles, “Cool your jets, Doctor. I’m sure he took the best you have to offer.”
The Doctor huffs as he turns away.
“I think I’ve got it.” B’Elanna says softly as she finishes tightening the screws. “Computer, initiate link with mobile emitter.”
A long pause, then, “Link established.”
B’Elanna looks around, “Alright, everyone hold your breath.” She sets the emitter down, “Okay, Computer, activate program stored in emitter.”
A moment later, the computer beeps several times, then the air coalesces into the form of Twilight Sparkle, who sits heavily and looks around. She smiles brightly at Tom and sqees.
Tom grins, “I always liked that.”
Twilight stands up, “Well, since you are all around, that means it worked?”
Janeway nods, “Yes, we’ve taken care of the soldiers.”
“And Naomi?”
Captain Janeway straightens her uniform. “She’s safe, I’ll have her go into the holodeck later and you can have time with her. But I want to talk to you first.” Twilight nods uncertainly, “How did you reactivate yourself on the holodeck when the intruder alert was called?”
Twilight shakes her head, uncertain what to say.
“Oh, you silly humans and your holoprogams. It’s always so interesting to see them lose themselves to silly programs. I much prefer to create an entire reality.” Comes a new voice.
Janeway narrows her eyes as she looks around, “Q.” She says menacingly.
Twilight’s wings flare in anger as she also looks around, “Discord!” She shouts.
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A holographic sans the skeleton with this kind of power would be the most op thing ever. (I know that that's a different thing altogether but it just popped into my head
Please say there is more to come!
This is not the end. This cannot be the end! WHY DOES THIS SAY 'COMPLETE'?!
wow a totally awesome story I love it short sweet and beautiful.
just wow this is a amazing story.
Good job so far, I like it. Please keep the chapters coming.
Short, sweet, single episode of Star Trek voyager. 2 parts, was all it took :)
Didn't want Twilight to become or look Mary Sue. Was a bit tricky to "blend" the to genra's and stay true to both. but i think sparky pulled it off great.
It's over?
NOOOOOO!
Very nice! Love the last set up for a sequel someday...
mlp + Voyager = win
Extra points for Voyager's Littlest Crewmember
Wait is it over? Awww, it was just getting good
A wonderful crossover mostly true to both series ruining the ideas of either one. That seems to be the downfall of most crossovers
I'm always looking for good Trek/MLP crossovers. This was nicely done, if a little short.
Definitely liked how Holodeck Twilight was meta-aware of Q.
A fun little story. The ending felt a bit abrupt, but I don't know what more could really have been written. You don't often see stories written in the present tense.
8090432 I actually typically write present tense. But yeah, just a short little story, but fun. I have other stories if you want something a bit longer. Just check out my user page, and maybe something would jive with what you are looking for.
Loved this story. Wish it was a little bit longer.
A very entertaining story, I would love to see a few short stories based from this one.
Thank you for the hard work you have put into this story, Sparky!
https://www.fimfiction.net/group/211585/reviewers-cafe/thread/308771/reviews?page=3#comment/6061713
Aww, I was just getting into this, and then I saw it was complete. I loved the ending with Q/Discord shinnanigans, and was hoping you'd continue in later chapters. But this is finished, on the most teasing of cliffhangers. Le sigh. If you do anymore with this idea or make a sequel, I'd love to read it.XD
8556411 you mean like Rescue at Midnight Station
8219388
Yep, the sequel is up.
Came here from the sequel page(decided to read this first) I think maybe the locations need more description but I like it. Also yea on the nose but appropriate that Q/Discord had a hand into Holo-Twi going sentient. A chance to have his first real mortal friends live again? It would be too good to resist!
This is a well written, creative and fantastic story.
I especially love how the Author chose to end it.
Great job
The Monk
DisQord is the perfect explanation and ending for that one. Lol.
9067072
Remember theres also Rescue At Midnight Station. Another episode with the pony cast. And they even sing songs!
Very interesting story, I'm waiting for more like it. Well done!👍👌
9644446
`I did Rescue at Midnight Station, which is a direct sequel to this one. Hope you read and enjoy.
Ohhhh this is good!! Looking now hoping for a sequal.
Ending with a cliffhanger. That is not funny
! Still from the two chapters, it was not a bad story to read and follow. Looking forwards to the sequel I am reading now.
Well this was nice.
The title of the sequel to this story, "Rescue At Midnight Station" is a call back & reference to "Rescue At Midnight Castle" from G1.
So I like the core premise, the twist of Equestria being a holodeck program was nice. I haven't seen many stories that pull off having MLP be both a work of fiction but also "real" and this story has a good example of how to do that properly.
There are a bunch of the smaller details that I don't think quite stick. Why did Tom make this program and spend months on it? I don' t believe he's shown to have any sort of relationship with Naomi unless I'm mistaken.
The actual shuttlepod doesn't need to be in the story; Naomi's other holoprogram we see simply accepts her presence, so there's no reason why the ponies couldn't do the same.
I like the idea of a holodeck malfunction (it doesn't have to be Q, no reason to include him at all, but I'll get to him later) causing a confused Twilight to be able to interact with the computer, though the computer has never allowed a hologram to interact with it, so it should not really advise her she can only exist in certain areas of the ship (it has to think she's flesh and blood to allow her to interact with it).
Moriarty in TNG was able to call the computer but there's no way they didn't patch that fleet-wide, after that incident, come on! :)
Twilight pretty much has to steal the mobile emitter for any of the rest of the story to work. Not sure how it might work differently though ((I don't think it's in her character to do that).
Twilight removes Naomi from her quarters, where by all indications she is safe. Hirogen aren't going to care about going through individual quarters until they've secured the ship, I would think. Twilight takes her into a dangerous situation TWICE (out of her quarters, and then later into engineering) so I would think not only would Twilight probably not do that in reality, but Janeway and the rest of the crew would not be happy with her doing so.
One thing could help sell the previous two points is if Tom makes tweaks to the ponies' programming to aid in the whole children's programming thing. He could make them super protective of Naomi. Since they're locked into the holodeck and the safeties are on, nothing can go wrong... right? Anyway this change could lead Twilight to not trust anyone or anything to protect Naomi other than her, leading to her actually putting Naomi in danger.
Twilight using magic doesn't make sense. At the end of the day she's just a hologram and magic isn't real. Remember she's a simulation, and the mobile emitter can try to simulate her magic, but it has its limits. I would imagine it can simulate a person but nothing really beyond that. In a proper holodeck (including sickbay) all sorts of illusions and normal holodeck trickery can simulate her full array of spells. But with the mobile emitter she can only do what any hologram could (and if she's not aware she is one... I think this would have been an interesting direction to go... she's further limited by that). No shield, no projectiles, voice modulator works ok, maybe she can fly, etc.
Safety protocol on a hologram outside of the holodeck doesn't make sense and I don't think we've seen it in the show. The Doctor can make himself permeable or solid which is about the closest thing but he has full control over that, not the ship's computer (I think the ship's computer can't really control the mobile emitter at all anyway; it's autonomous). There's no need for a safety protocol for the doctor since he knows he's a hologram and his purpose is to interact with patients. So he would not have a safety protocol anyway. And that could extend to the mobile emitter.
Twilight probably should not realize she's a hologram. Possibly at least partly due to being programmed to ignore any suggestion that she is (we see in the irish town setting in one of the Voyager episodes that this is how they are supposed to work). Would be fun to see that train of thought.
I think the ending is the weakest point. Don't like the common fic trope of making Q and Discord the same... they have different motivations and attitudes for one thing. Plus given the story you've set up it doesn't make sense.
Also the way the Hirogen are defeated is horribly convenient. I think it would have been better to allow the crew of Voyager to actually defeat then, and have Twilight and Naomi's story focused on Twilight keeping her safe rather than saving the whole ship, too. Maybe she can protect Naomi from a Hirogen, the mobile emitter is damaged, she still gets her heroic sacrifice.
I wouldn't have the Doctor's code used in Twilight. The Doctor's existence alone is a moral conundrum, copying him isn't any better. I think the story works fine without this plot point.
To be clear I did enjoy all of the high level story beats (apart from the ending I think). I really like those concepts. I just would have handled the finer details differently I think.
Oh yeah and there's no reason why Twilight should know the turbolifts are voice activated.
Gonna read the sequel tomorrow I think.
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Thank you for your comments. I did not think in the direction that you did. And you bring up some good points.
As to Discord=Q. If you read Knight's Gambit, you might see a bit of how Discord and Q can be the same...yet different. But that's a whole other continuity. I hope you enjoy Rescue at Midnight Station, though some of the issues that you brought up will certainly be present on that one. But I still hope you find it to be enjoyable.
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Nope but its Tom, we're lucky he didn't go and add "Racing fins" on the shuttle. LOL. of COURSE Toms going to have a shuttle crash land and that be the focus or starting point of the story. As to why, it was likely to help Nelix, after his work on freehaven, nelix likely asked him for something for children.
Patching it is one thing, but did they account for a hologram changing its voice to match that of another ship member? We see the doctor do it on one occasion so we know its possible. And to allow the doctor "computer access" an issue might have cropped in there as well.
Finally - mass stun effect - yeah they have done that before too, its not really convenient its happened at least 3 times that i can count..
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Well, EMH replaces actual medical officer, and they have seniority of command at times
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLYFCrqIUQrCl96bMAQyo2ujF9CIynsn_w
I finished an audiobook adaption of Shuttlepod Down. I hope you all enjoy it.