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Sparky Brony


I'm an electrician working in Fargo, ND. I love writing pony stories, and reading good fanfiction. My Patreon!

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Betazed, a lavish and beautiful world. Filled with singing waterfalls, lush fields, vibrant jungles, home to billions of people. All of that beauty, culture and history, and it could all come to an end.

Diplomacy is an endless game of chess. Faced with imminent destruction, the flagship of the federation has been summoned, but can this ship and its crew save the planet? Or will the home world of Deanna Troi be lost forever? With time running out, Picard may need to take chances, risks, and make a Knights Gambit.

Wow! Featured in four hours! Thank you soooo much!

I just saw that I forgot to give attribution to those who helped with this story, starting with Kitsy-Chan for helping the basic storyline and helping to make it into a 3 dimensional story, kalash for editing, and can't forget Hart's Fire, mocha, and so many others for input on this story as I started and continued it!

Art by Andrew Gavrilov

Chapters (12)
Comments ( 525 )

wow this is looking to be a awesome story.
and a new story out of the Sparky Brony stable amazing.

Oh wow.

This is one of only two fics that have managed to explain any physics behind the orbiting of Equestria's sun.

And your scripting of the dialogue of the Enterprise bridge crew feels like I am watching an actual episode.

I feel giddy and am reading it with a smile !

Very well done mate :ajsmug:

Well, a good Star Trek story.

Ok u have my attention

A very interesting concept. I will gladly track this and see where you take it.

One point of improvement would be the grammar and sentence structure. It’s passable, but only just. I would highly recommend a proofreader.

This is more Star Trek than actual modern Star Trek!

Love it!

I can’t wait for data and twilight to meet!!

I think Data would have noted the similarities between all of the creatures here and Greek myth. It still looks to be interesting and I wonder how Picard will react when he meets Discord?

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The Orville and Spaceballs is more Star Trek then modern Star Trek.

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have you read shuttlepod down and Rescue at Midnight Station.

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I've read Shuttle Pod Down.
But haven't got around to Rescue at Midnight Station.

Have you read Arrow 18 ?
That does a splendid job of explaining the physics/method behind the orbital patterns.

Of course, there is more to a good story than an explanation of physics.
Every so often a real gem comes along that ticks all the boxes.

Also I can't help but wonder if Q has a hand in this story...

Without her input, the sun would continue its orbit, but it would slow down and eventually stop after a few days.

Well, maybe it wouldn't do that if you had the sun and moon orbit in the same direction! Every sunrise and sunset you see in the show, the sun and moon rise and fall from the same side of the sky as each other. Their respective gravitational pulls would definitely interfere with each other. So yeah, this interpretation matches up well with my observations and resulting headcanon.

I find this interesting. This looks like one I'll be keeping an eye on.

Someone has already stated that, grammatically, this story needs a bit of work, but I would like to be more specific in stating that, especially in the beginning, you had trouble keeping the same tense, using present tense in one paragraph then past tense in the next.

And, as you might be able to tell from the way I write, I am a man who enjoys his commas, so in particular I noticed that, though your writing style requires them, you don’t include as many as you probably should.

Neither of these problems are in any way a deal breaker for me, though, and I am eagerly awaiting the next update.

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I'm sorry, that might be my fault in a few places... Sparky usually write in present tense, i tend to write in past... there were a few places where i went in and touched up or changed things to make them more... Trek or more "true to character". And the tenses got mixed up.

*looks down scuffing a hoof* don't blame sparky. I'm sorry.

Very interested to see where this goes! I like the insight into the actual physics of Equestria. You could use some help from an editor/proofreader.

This has potential. Also it shows early seasons by the fact O'Brian isnt on DS9.

This is really impressive. Everyone seems to be in character. However....

“We may need to make an exception here, I don’t like this, a Federation world endangered by this world.” Picard shook his head, “Our choices are do nothing and let Betazed be destroyed, evacuate the planet in violation of the prime directive, or destroy the planet, killing all life, in violation of the prime directive.”

“Seems like evacuation is our best option,” Riker says.

I refuse to believe that they managed to decide this without spending hours upon hours agonizing over this in the conference room!

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You can also tell it’s pre-DS9 by the Stardate! DS9 starts on 46379.1, while the date listed here is 46225.2

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Haven't read it yet, but the mention of Physics make me want to now.
Kitsy and Spark do good work!
Your mention of Q though was what really got me to comment. Would love to see an interaction between Q and Discord. Heck, bring John De Lancie through the Portal too, and have them all have a good chat.

Colour me interested. Looking forward to more.

yes yes YES YES

the disQord concept is my favorite

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Why do you think the Enterprise is here? This is basically a negative space wedgie and what better ship then the Enterprise. You have the best of the best on the ship and with a tight time table they want the beings who can make the necessary quick decisions that are needed. Plus Data has probably been running the calculations since Picard left the bridge and is presenting so the call can be made.

"Captain's Log Stardate 161413.5. BOOP!"

For any of you that might be wondering, the numbers for the Stardate represent four certain letters of the alphabet. I'll let you figure out which ones.

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umm, we is kind of correct. Think about any time they have a situation like this, you'll have a full scene with them around the table talking about the morality.

I. Am. So. Hyped. This is amazing!:pinkiehappy:

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I think time is of the essence here. I remember that at one pointIn another episode they where talking about evacuating a planet and they would only be able to save a small few of the beings in the time they had. In this situation Picard using that knowledge is just pushing the issue forward and starting the rescue. As for the PD I think in this situation the Enterprise’s own continuing mission makes it more important to step in and actively interfere. As the opening narration states, “To explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations.” If we are using stuff from Enterprise then this is from Captain Archer and Troi implied at one point that she was required to memorize the entire speech in school. Now I think if we would get either a personal log or a first officer’s log about another characters reservations about this whole thing I would be completely cool with it.

Why should the Pony Planet be the one getting nuked? As i understand Betazoids have other planets but the Equestrians only have the one. I am not sure the maths align here.

Hmmm ... I hope she says something like I wonder how a human got here and blow picards mind.

I'm sorta glad riker didn't make first contact... he'd of slept with one of the princesses within the first 24 hours. Dont know how but itd happen somehow. Hes the Kirk of the next generation crew.

Also how does blowing up the planets inside an anomaly guarentee the anomaly collapsing. The planets might be the only thing keeping it from expanding. That's like saying well throw nukes at a island in a hurricane to stop the hurricane. It might be easier to just ask them to get a bunch of unicorns and alicorns together and move betazed outta the way and put it back after the anomaly passes once they talk about alternatives. Push comes to shove use the staff the storm king had put their power into it and move it that way.

I got the perfect alternative move the betazeds to pony world they like being naked and ponies are usually always naked they'd get along greatly ...lol.

Edit: Just pictured them firing torpedoes at the planet then discord appearing then swallowing the torpedoes and going now thems some spicy meatballs. Then his stomach expands and he burps smoke and it deflates.

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I know, but i keep thinking of the planet that was about to explode. Where they sat around discussing the morality of "saving it" because data was talking to a child.

"where are we now captain?"

Picard holds his hand about nose level.

Yeah they were in it pretty deep thanks to Data.

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You do know Discord is Q this is just another one of the his schemes involving Picard

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As I said earlier Discord is Q this is just another one of his schemes that involves Picard it's plainly stated that use part of this as the "Mon Capitan" quote indicates

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I'll say it Again Discord is Q end of discussion! he just makes himself look like Discord when he's on equus to blend in a bit just like he makes himself look human around other humans this is just another one of his schemes involving Picard

Slowly a single hand moves to pick up a pawn moving it forward a space, and a soft chuckle can be heard, "Your move Mon Capitaine, you had better hurry, or it will be mate in 67 turns."

Q, what are you doing? This had better not be like the time you made Picard feel better about being an only child by proving that his brother would have literally grown up to be space-Hitler. Because that was kind of a bummer really.

Her most faithful student has actually gone on vacation with her friends.

AU confirmed!

Sleep beckoned the alicorn mare, and she was quite happy to comply. Again she lit her horn and pulled her royal regalia from around her neck, her hoofguards were next, and finally her crown. As her horn quieted her ears flicked. She heard something that was completely out of her experience, an almost musical chime along with an undercurrent of electrical discharge.

Why do these things always happen just as you're trying to get to sleep? Why not, say, at half-past noon right after lunch? You know, when you're alert and prepared to deal with the day's nonsense?


You know, the funny thing is that Celestia is going to be quite familiar with the concept of humans, given her student's current residence. Indeed, this entire assemblage is clearly of artificial origin, one wonders who assembled it...

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I know that episode.
Data's friend over the radio.
One of my favourites.

*later in the episode...

Riker: So where do you think we are now Captain ?

Picard: *waves hand above head*

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If your logic holds out how do you explain Eris and Cosmos?

The only thing I don't get is that it seems like they decided to evacuate Equestria (and then blow it up)? Wouldn't it make a lot more sense to evacuate Betazed? Or would both places be destroyed otherwise?

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More is shown in upcoming chapters, but for now, both systems are in mortal peril.

I hope Cadance meets the Crystalline Entity

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If you have to carve up a planet and time is short, why not the planet in front of you?

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Personally, I would prefer this to be a DisQord story, but that remains to be seen. I can also see it being just as entertaining if Discord ≠ Q.
I was also thinking Celestia's response should be "Jean-Luc Picard? I've heard of you. You've gone by another name. You were called 'Locutus of Borg' :trollestia:" except that option is out, as Holtinator pointed out, this encounter is occurring before the events of Wolf 549.

Definitely off to a good and interesting start. Looking forward to this chess game. :rainbowdetermined2::pinkiecrazy:

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Because one planet holds (several) newly discovered specie, would Star Fleet snuff out a culture and destroy their home world to save one of their many planets? If they were to take this course of action i am certain rest of the Galaxy would laugh at their high and mighty ideals for next hundred years. They have sat on the high-horse as morality goes, would they now be ready to destroy the innocence to save their allies?

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If you have to carve up a planet and time is short, why not the planet in front of you?

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In the case of "rogue" planets and planitoids, Its usually the rogue which is sacraficed, the reason being that the even if you clear out the system planet... the rogue could continue on and disrupt other or destroy other systems planets down the road. And until they chart its "path" through the system and watch how it interacts with other bodies, potentially destroying them, and/or itself... fully plot its course.

Things like this are why they usually choose to knock out the rogue.

Yeah I'm gonna need another chapter soon

Another great crossover off to another awesome start! I'm so excited for this!

Looks good to me. Though the natives might have other ideas about what to do, eh? 🎱U🎱

I was wondering when someone would finally write a decent TNG crossover. At least recently.
By the way, I noticed some easy to fix grammar errors pertaining to 'its' and 'it's'.
Pro-tip: if the sentence can't make sense by substituting it's for 'it is', then just use 'its' instead. :moustache:

It's still an interesting concept, but I feel you're rushing a tad, breaking pace and sort of breaking normal procedure for how the TNG crew would normally handle things:

“Scans do not indicate they are related to Earth or similar Equines beyond passing familiarity. Though there are four distinct types, or tribes, among these ponies.” He brings up some pictures the computer had finished rendering. “We have the standard ponies, then we have the winged ponies, then we have ponies with horns much like the unicorns of human mythos, and lastly we have the rarest of the ponies, the ones with wings and horns. Scans show a total of three of them, though there is a possibility that there are others that our scanners haven’t found as of yet.” He looked back at the Captain. “I recommend beaming down a few dozen holographically camouflaged probes, we can try to get linguistic information, as well as some close observation of the population. Their culture, habits, and behavioral patterns.”

“You are talking first contact procedures.”

Whenever The Enterprise discovers a new planet, a scan would never give them such detailed information about the species. They would need to beam down and do some reconnaissance first. Even if you ignore my massive nitpick, having Data just outright tell the Captain what the main equine species are like without having met them sort of takes away from the realism and writing opportunities for later scenes. :moustache:

Riker inhales to object and was stopped by the Captain’s outstretched hand. “I know your objections, and they are noted. This requires a negotiator, with diplomacy, delicacy and finesse.” He looks at Worf. “I will beam down to this Princess Celestia, alone.”

Another nerdy nitpick, Riker has been shown in the TNG universe to be well skilled at negotiation. There have been entire episodes about that.

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