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When Thorax received a message from Chrysalis he is left with two options: Meet with her to discuss the future of the changeling race, or prepare for a civil war.
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This story had been translated into Russian here
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Totally missed the dark tag before I started reading, and the Gore tag... (that's what I get for going to a story straight from my feed i guess?) But anyway wow, was not expecting that ending. Poor Thorax, his reign was so short. How could Weevil turn on him so easily like that?
still, a well done little short. Might not have liked how it ended, but then with what we have seen of Canon Chrysalis, it does seem to fit. (Much as I hate to admit it, what with her being my favourite character.)
7630785 Thanks I'm glad you liked it, more or less. With the exception of Weevil, this is basically how I imagine Thorax's reign would go. Short and with a messy end. But if it helps I don't think Chrysalis would be like that all the time.
7630817
but yeah I thought it an enjoyable read. (For example, nopony liked it when Dumbledore died, but we all mostly still love the books? That is kind of how it is for me if that makes sense?)
Yeah i can see that, from what we know of him he doesn't seem the leader type, being even more passive than Celestia(if that is even possible) so as much as I like the 'little' guy, I do have to agree with you there. And good, glad to hear you don't think of her as 'completely insane?
Interesting, when i did mine "A promise of Hate" i thought baout doing this, but i liked fitting it in with my own ideas for changeling stories instead.
7630817 except no. and more so, if she did, she would have an even shorter reign and cdelestia would outright MURDER her for such violence.
chrysalis had to rely upon the defenses of her kingdom as a means to capture and contain the alicorns............. she no longer has it. it is gone. so she would be dead.
Wow, that was dark, but rather probable.
I love the idea of harnessing anger, it's a powerful emotion. And I like that you thought out of the box and didn't show the friendship way as the only true one.
Equestria might be kind of doomed, though, the changelings are now self-powered, so they can continuously grow in power without using it up to stay alive, and they retain all their abilities.
7630785 How was Weevil's turn surprising? She was one of the changelings who betrayed the Queen without a moment of hesitation, it's clear that she has no problems switching allegiances on the fly.
7631421 Only now Chryssie is more powerful than ever, not having to use up energy to keep herself alive. And she said that she'll rebuild the throne.
7631712
True, there is that, and each brought her something she wanted in different ways(getting rid of the hunger) heh anger at her was just my initial reaction.
Not surprising. If the other changelings only did change to get rid of their hunger, then it would be a fickle loyalty. In this story they can satisfy their hunger without becoming reliant on the ponies.
7631712 cept her acting like this would be a situation where she oculd not gain that energy. cause, well, she would not have changed
also it is beyond doutful she could repair the throne. i doubt she even MADE the damn thing to begin with. more than likely it wa an artifact from days before her.
and, again, it would have to be before celestia kills her. and no, even if she is somewhat stronger than before, she is nowhere near the league of Celestia. and even if she WAS they still have luna to back her up. or just send discord because of the potential threat she is to fluttershy and the others.
this is just a 'i hate the episode so i am going to 'improve' it' story. Cept they creat a scenario that has little actual thought to it.
7632398 Why would she not gain that energy? She's changed, but without changing her look. It's clearly stated in the fic that he changelings have had the same boost in power caused by not feeling the hunger anymore as Thorax and his changelings.
There's nothing pointing at her being unable to rebuild it. She knows where the material came from, it's more than likely that the throne was built by royal changelings in the past. Her words about rebuilding it point at her knowing how to do it.
With her newfound power, Celestia wouldn't have such easy of a job. Plus, cash she even finds Chrysalis? Apparently there are other hives and they're loyal to her. She can be in any of then. She can even hide in a random cave or have he changelings dig a new hive underground. Or she can hide feel in the cave where she killed Thorax, after dealing with any transformed changelings knowing where she called him. And said cave is protected against magic other than that of the changelings. She has so many ways to evade Celestia's wrath that the very thought of Sunbutt finding her is hilarious, especially that they have no spells that can detect a changeling in disguise. She could go and sit in a cafe in Canterlot and nobody would be none the wiser. Or she could transform into any object. Without ass pulls by the writers, like those during the wedding and the finale, the array of powers changelings have and the ponies' complete lack of ways to combat them aside of Shining and Cadance using that spell, which can clean a single city at a time at best and we don't even know if it works on disguised changelings, the changelings can pretty much evade the ponies whenever they like and infiltrate their society without limits.
7632398 you're absolutely right, it's just suffering for its sake rather then an actual conflict
7631421 You know I expect people not to like this story, but I expected their arguments to be more...sensible. OK lets straighten out some of these facts.
Celestia would not murder anyone given the choice. I don't know why so many people see her as a violence killing machine. Oh something else I feel I should point out: Moving the sun =/= godlike power. (Same goes for Luna)
But even if Celestia wanted to murder Chrysalis, she would still have to declare war in order to do so, and considering she didn't declare war after the initial invasion I doubt very much she would. There is also the views of other nations to take into account, considering Equestria basically helped Thorax in a Coup d'état they could view it as anything from interfering with foreign affairs to an outright invasion. Neither Celestia or Luna would want Equestria to be view in such a light. And all of this doesn't even cover the problems with an invasion.
7632398
Are you saying it's because Chrysalis didn't change into one of those colorful thing she would not be able to gain the power to defeat Celestia? If so that is wrong. As I explained in the story, with the new method of dealing with hunger Chrysalis will become stronger the more love she takes in.
Oh I didn't realize you wrote on the show and my story...oh you didn't. Then were are you getting this information? I clearly state in the story that it can be repaired and the show gives no hints to the contrary. It's fine if you want to use that information for your own stories, but I don't see it like that.
Chrysalis is as strong in this story as the time she defeated Celestia, I was trying to make that clear without down right saying it, and it's only up from here.
Discord doesn't care. They had to kidnap Fluttershy before he even gave it a second thought, so as long as they leave Fluttershy alone I doubt Discord will do anything.
The irony is your arguments has little actual thought put into it. But you are thinking of Fix fics, while a bit similar to what I did, they all take place during the episode itself. This is more of a episode follow up, but I won't deny that I wrote this because I hated that ending.
This was an interesting read, I liked it. Good to see that Chrysalis had realised the potential of sustainable emotional food sources, although building a society that filled with hatred is a risky business. Thanks for writing.
7667168 I'm glad you like the story.
Unfortunately, this story wasn't written with a sequel in mind, so sorry. I do have an idea for longer story similar to this one, but I have other stories I need to get caught up on first.
Interesting.... If there isn't a sequel you should definitely make one. However, if there is one and I just don't seem to see it please tell me about it and I'll take a look.
7716914 Unfortunately, this story will not be getting a direct sequel, but I do plan to write a much longer story based around this idea, a changeling civil war that is.
7717041 Okay, thank you for the quick reply!
Sorry, but this is garbage.Disregard this statement; I've changed my mind. I may not like how this story ended, but that doesn't make it garbage.
7721057 If you are going to go through the trouble of saying "It's garbage" you could at least take the time to say why.
7721096
I'm not sure you're going to be able to take my reasons, as they're likely going to sound like RealityCheck at his most judgemental. However, since I do have dark-themed stories myself, I should at least give you my reasoning for calling this garbage.
In essence, I did not like the end because the Evil Bug Queen won, and the kind changeling lost. I know that happens all the time in real life; trouble is, I read these fics to ESCAPE from real life. When someone goes to the trouble of writing drivel- and this is an opinion of the fic, not the author -that brings real life shit on this level into the sugar bowl that is mlp, I can only see it as one thing.
The very worst of slash fiction.
Again, let me stress; this is my opinion. What I see as piss, another might see as fine wine. I may not like it, but others do.
By the way, this opinion goes beyond mlp. I don't care for Daxter for many of the same reasons; why in the hell would I want to read about the inner turmoil of a murderous sociopath?! The only thing they're good for is fertilizer.
Note: As my opinion has changed, I no longer consider this to be as bad as originally thought. I missed the subtext.
7721440 Based on how you worded everything I'm guessing you have been attacked a few times for a negative review, but don't worry I don't plan to bite your head off. I just wanted to know why you didn't like it, saying it's garbage tells me about as much as a drive by dislike.
I can understand why you would not like it, but I wouldn't consider this story garbage based on that alone. Don't get my wrong, I wouldn't exactly consider this story one of my "masterpieces," so to say. I mainly wrote this story as a way to vent my frustration about the season 6 final, as I'm sure you have guess I was not a big fan.
Anyway, thanks for giving me a reply and for reading the story in the first place.
7721481
More like that I've seen others attacked by negative reviews. I hardly get any comments on my fics.
I should say that this story is well-written though, and I honestly shouldn't judge it based on the fact that I don't like the ending. So, I retract my 'garbage' comment, though I won't be able to retract the down vote.
And after this i remember it.
Tonight I intend to teach you how to hate.
Great story, got me goospumped keep them coming!