• Member Since 4th May, 2013
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Estee


On the Sliding Scale Of Cynicism Vs. Idealism, I like to think of myself as being idyllically cynical. (Patreon, Ko-Fi.)

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Source

Rainbow just discovered water balloons.

Discovering why ponies don't use them is going to take slightly longer.


(A stand-alone, no prior-reading-necessary part of the Triptych Continuum, which has its own TVTropes page and FIMFiction group: new members and trope edits are welcome. )

Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 77 )

Silly me, I assumed I knew what the problem would be.

I did knot.

I'll admit, I couldn't stop laughing as I read this.

Good job, as always.

Not a Tripyarch'verse fic?

It's reached the point where I'll add your stories to my favorites before even reading it. Bravo, Estee. Another great story.

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'tis such, as Ratchette's presence attests. I just didn't put the blurb on immediately because it's really a stand-alone, and I wanted to experiment a little and see if leaving that paste off failed to induce terror in laboratory Internets. I'll add it tomorrow.

That was pretty funny. Hands rule, hooves drool.

Oh dear... Rainbow should have just listened to Pinkie from the start. Lesson learned I believe.

To be fair, the average unicorn would be hard pressed to so easily manipulate triple-digit numbers of just about anything. Unfortunately for Dash, Rarity is quite above average in that respect.

In any case, not what I rush-judged, but still tremendously enjoyable. Plus, there's something wonderfully bizarre in Dash ordering something that was advertised on the show.

And remember, everyone: cutie marks are often multilayered in their meaning. That doesn't mean you should disregard the most obvious one.

(Oh, and I could be mistaken, but I think this is your first time writing Zecora. Whether or not that's the case, nice work with her.)

My first guess was Water Balloons, but I dropped it because I didn't think that much could be done with it.
I have underestimated Rainbow Dash, something that will not occur again.

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Plus, there's something wonderfully bizarre in Dash ordering something that was advertised on the show.

:duck: Seriously? (Remember, I don't get the Hub.) This story came about because I saw the product in-store. I had no idea they'd bought time during an episode.

"...Now when it comes to getting it on, I've got a tool I could let you --"...

Context, Ratchette. Keep an eye out for context.

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Indeed. How's that for a happy accident?

(And hey, at least it isn't Gak. :raritywink:)

Okay, that was pretty funny all the way through. Gotta admit, though, my favorite was the segment with Zecora. That awkward pause just gets me.

Flutteryshy opening saddlebags with her wings make me think Pegasi wouldn't have this much trouble turning something

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Saddlebag opening is basic leverage, though. For the rest... well, here's an exercise for those who like the more "realistic" range of pony object manipulation to try at home:

Find something which will fit comfortably over your balled fists. The end should be fully blunt and rounded: small paint cans or large plastic soup containers are good for this. Make fists, then jam them into the containers.

Okay. Now: go about your day normally, for as long as you can. No fingers, no palms: just two blunt rounded objects at the end of your arms, to do everything you would do in the course of a normal day.

Good luck.

Incidentally, for those giving their cars significant looks, it's generally a good idea to stop this exercise before it kills someone.

And yet more evidence that Rarity fights dirty...

...or in this case, extremely well groomed.

(It could have been worse, she could have gone after Twilight. She wouldn't have a dry/un-dyed coat for moons.)

:moustache: claws Rainbow claws twisty claws!
:rainbowhuh: No duh
:duck: hooves verses claws.....claws win
:moustache: and magic,,,
:twilightoops: think Spike would have no problem righty tighty lefty loosey ...
:moustache: that last part where you got Rainbow it was epic!
:duck: I do have my moments Spikey boo
:rainbowhuh: just lucky that's all

Poor Dashie, if only she wasn't so proud and stubborn. :derpytongue2:

It's a pity that Rainbow Dash doesn't have a ton of available hooves, access to a small amount of magic, and enough engineering knowledge to rig up a working catapult.

Man, these are the most complicated water balloons I've ever heard of.

Ironically enough, they're probably also the only ones which ponies could feasibly fill up with water.

I'm inordinately amused that you wrote a story about Rainbow Dash attempting to prank ponies with massed barrages of water balloons, and make the story focused on the logistics problems she has with filling and using the balloons without hands. :rainbowderp:

TimesX #22 · Jun 2nd, 2016 · · 10 ·

First thing that entered my mind about these "water balloons" based on the description were condoms.

Then i saw the E tag.:applejackunsure:

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Incidentally, for those giving their cars significant looks, it's generally a good idea to stop this exercise before it kills someone.

Surprisingly, you can totally drive a car with no hands; people who have lost both their hands are still capable of driving cars safely. It seems kind of weird, but it is totally doable, and is actually easier than a lot of other tasks.

Well, now we know Rainbow's not a Changeling.

Estee #25 · Jun 2nd, 2016 · · 1 ·

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Would it matter if she was?

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It would explain the problems with the weather schedule, and help solve countless other consequent difficulties. "Thanks, Rainbow, that's the best news I've heard all year!"

(I did not jump on that bandwagon but if I had it would have been "Hey Twilight, I totally am!")

I officially declare Esteeverse Rarity to be The Unsinkable Rarity.

Poor Dashie. Poor, poor, self-deluded Dash. Her interactions with Rachette were a particular joy, though the increasing frustration of all she spoke with was well done.

And Rarity. Oh, I love your Rarity. She's so very much the mistress of this situation, one can imagine her prancing away from the spa with a sweet little smirk of triumph.

Actually, now I'm wondering about Spike getting his claws on these. In "Twilight's Escort Service" you said that any scrolls sent to Rainbow while she was flying would bop her on the muzzle before falling to the ground. If the balloons survive his flame, it is the perfect delivery system...

...and not just for Rainbow. Half her order was for balloons containing dye? Pink-lestia?

7269040 "Surprisingly, you can totally drive a car with no hands; people who have lost both their hands are still capable of driving cars safely."

Turning the key would probably be the hardest part.

dammit dash, that's why you empty the saddlebags and fly out of her range to watch the carnage

7268101 It's like Of Age with water balloons.

One.

Two.

Three.

Ten.

Twenty.

One hundred.

Two hundredA hundred ninety-nine.

Incidentally, I'm very disappointed in all of you. We've gotten this far in the Comments and not one person has gone for "One hundred and ninety-nine dye balloons glow by"?

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... and then the megaspells flew. :raritydespair:

the normal unicorn can defend if they see it coming, and even so, she could sill try it with Applejack.

Those bands are ORings. On our world they are made of chloroprene, better known by the brandname Neoprene. ¿Do the ponies have chloroprene? The ponies are in the midst of an industrial revolution.

You know, only now does something occur to me: How exactly does plumbing work in a cloud house?

7270679 don't think too hard about the black water...

"And the purpose of this... plan? I cannot see just how you can --"

Damn, Zecora can even anticipate interruptions to maintain rhymes? She's good. :pinkiegasp:

Loved it! That's karma at work for ya.

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Then it means that now its time to stop reading those clopfics. :trollestia:

You know, in spite of how this ended, I really feel like it could have gone better had Pinkie helped from the get go.

Though that said, the final lesson of "Rarity and water balloons, not even once" is unlikely to play out particularly differently absent help from someone on the scale of Twilight. But that just means you should pick a less terrifying target.

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Apologies. All I could think of was HELLZONE GRENADE!

At least revenge had a cool name.

All that work she had put into the prank, and Rarity ruined it! :fluttercry:

This kept a solid smile on my face the entire way through.

Well done.
:twilightsmile:

I will admit, I didn't see the major flaw coming. It was pretty good.

Then Rainbow Dash heard about super-soakers from griffonstone:rainbowlaugh:
But then had to go get Twilight to show her how it worked, resulting in Dashie getting a 21 super-soaker salute :twilightsmile:

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Or getting Ratchette to build more and more powerful versions until she meets Newton's Third Law going the other way...

Estee - wonderful story, especially Rarity at the end.

Excellent as always, Estee. Thanks.

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