3: Tight Squeeze
Everything was sticky. The walls were sticky. The floors were sticky. Spike was sticky. Every component of his anatomy adhered to every other part, popping and smacking with wet noises as he trundled down into the abandoned mine.
The formerly abandoned mine, that was. Drones scuttled to and fro, scratching hooves working to clear away the dirt, while a few experts shaped cast-off chitin into buttresses and supports. Green muck covered everything, and mold covered the muck.
It was a tight fit, but the tunnels were first dug for heavy drilling equipment, so, with effort and a bit of lubrication, Spike could squeeze through. He stopped to scrape a smear off his claw. “It’s a, um, nice place you’ve got here.” Take notes for Twilight.
Chrysalis responded, not looking back at him. “It suffices. Of course, we will be able to expand the caverns for you.”
“What was that? I didn’t quite hear you.”
“Oh, nothing. Nothing, Spike.” She led him further down, past the aphid farms where drones extracted what little love they could from lesser insects. It was a bestial sort of love, only a basic admiration for edible sap, but it could sustain a changeling. Barely.
Many voices had fallen silent since her defeat at Canterlot, a failure she still felt. The enduring drones did what they could to bury the irreparably-wounded in the hive, hoping that one day their queen would have enough love to wake them from their trance. As yet, she had not.
They put their faith in her, but she had earned it, hadn’t she?
“This way, Spike.” Her horn lit the sloping path, reflecting off gel and shining carapaces. The light was all for his benefit, of course—changelings were used to walking in the dark, another fact that Spike stored away in his brain.
The layout made little sense to him; pathways arched in random directions, some routes blocked by solid black plates. Insects of all shapes and sizes crawled, trotted, and flew—most looked like the ones from the royal wedding, but some had eight legs, some had two horns like a minotaur, and some bore humps like camels.
“Where are we going?” He ducked to avoid an egg sac above him.
The queen turned, tongue tasting the air. “We are going to feast!”
Spike gulped. His fire could probably fill up the whole cavern if it needed to…
One of the drones chirped a few sentences. Chrysalis’s eyes widened. “What?” She looked back at Spike and cleared her throat. “It seems our pantry is somewhat depleted of conventional food, however, so it may be a brief delay before we can feed you.” She came closer to Spike, almost brushing against his scales. “Unless you like slime?”
“Oh, um, no thanks.” A brief pause. “That’s okay, I’ll just… take notes, I guess.”
“It is very scrumptious slime. One of my drones says it is redolent of applewood and turpentine.” She walked forward, one hoof wrapping around a drone and bringing him along with her. They exchanged rapid-fire clicks, almost too fast for Spike to understand. What little he did catch went like this:
“Food… restaurant… feed big scaly oaf.”
“Restaurant… we know this word.” Spike heard a murmur of approval through the swarm, as well as a few hushed whispers. “Restaurant… restaurant… restaurant…”
“Go, stupid drone.” He buzzed off, trying to avoid the queen’s icy stare.
She swore they were not so moronic, back when they had enough love to eat. Oh, blame the drones, why don’t you, Chryssy? And whose fault is it that they’re starving?
Chrysalis shook her head to force out the voice in her mind. “Yes. Feeding time. Gather the drones, Asaf.”
The feeding area resembled an old step pyramid set in the center of a natural cavern. Stalactites drooped down from above, dripping mineral water on the slime and the seething conglomeration of changelings.
Chrysalis took the steps with practiced ease, moving around the places where the stone had fallen away. Four guards flanked her, their armor scratched and worn. Finally, she reached the top and gave an awful shriek. As best as Spike could tell, it was the call to feed. Soon, the changelings answered.
They followed her up the steps, mouths probing for her warm sea-green belly. Spike saw her grimace as each drone came to suckle from her. Wings rose to shelter her face as she looked away from them, and something black dribbled from her eyes.
The feeding took halfway to forever, changelings climbing the steps in groups of eight, drones carrying any nymphs too small to walk on their own. They took only a few drops each, then descended back into the swarm. Finally, there were no more coming.
But there should be. “Reza, I did not feel your mouth on my teats. Where are you?” The queen’s eyes tried to scan the surging crowd of changelings, but she did not see the wounded nymph. “Reza!” Her teeth flashed.
“Here, my queen.” Still limping, the nymph stumbled out of the horde.
The queen’s breath was ragged and forced, but she attempted to sound authoritative. “Even an imbecile like you must know that nymphs need their nourishment.”
Reza’s ear fins flattened as his head lowered to the ground. “My queen, you have already offered up your love to heal me. I do not want to take…” Chrysalis’s frown grew.
“Shut up! I told you, you are no good to me weak! Now come, feed on your queen’s bounty!”
The nymph clambered up the steps to her, dragging her recently-healed leg. A darting tongue reached out to the queen’s body before Chrysalis’s foreleg pulled Reza in closer. She sucked in air through her nose as the bug began to drain her love reserves even drier.
It seemed like the queen’s ‘bounty’ wasn’t as bountiful as she made it sound.
She tried to hide it behind her wings, but Spike would bet anything that Chrysalis gave the nymph a quick nuzzle. Softly, she muttered “Someday you’ll be strong, Reza.”
A trio of drones rushed forward to help her up. She teetered on her legs for a moment, trying to regain her breath. Eyeslits strained under the effort of staying open, but she managed, barely.
Her tongue tasted the air—healthy odors. The swarm was fed. She had a dragon to attend to now.
More chirps. One of her sprinters had made it to a pony restaurant, seduced the owner, and darted back with as much food as he could carry. Garnish with a few gems left over from the mine, and it would be a delectable—if not exactly dragon-sized—meal. Of course, a little extra boost might do it good as well…
She clicked an order and the sprinter ran into the pantry, grabbing slimy bottles with his horn and squelching the contents onto the food. Out he came, platter balancing precariously on his back, rushing to Spike.
“Stop!” The sprinter’s legs locked up as he heard the queen’s voice. “Our guest is a noble dragon, and would not deign to eat with his hands as peasants do!”
Spike raised a claw. “Actually, I’m more than happy to…”
“I did not ask your opinion! Drones, craft utensils!” Spike gagged a little as corpulent bugs, grease leaking from cracks in their chitin, vomited up dark slime and began to shape it into a dragon-sized knife.
Then a soup spoon, a teaspoon, an array of forks, and finally a dainty butter spreader. Queen Chrysalis almost smiled. Her drones had finally taken her etiquette lessons to heart. A glow from her horn hardened the slime, and green magic carried the utensils to the dragon along with the food.
Spike looked down at the meal. He doubted it was acquired… ethically, but he was hungry, and those jewel burgers were calling to him. Grasping a slime fork in his oversized claws, he took a bite.
It was fantastic. The toasted hay complimented the labradorite perfectly, flavors sparkling across his tongue as he took another munch.
“You know, most ponies would pair the hay with sapphires, but this really brings out the earthy texture of the burger. My compliments!” One of the bugs smiled and chirped something that sounded like “I told you I could be a waiter!”
“And the sauce!” From the edges of the burger dripped an electric green pesto. It tasted like pure life, mixed with sunshine. Spike couldn’t get enough. It was delicious! It was… the same color as the gunk that leaked from Chrysalis’s nipples.
Spike’s mouth hung open in mid-chew. “Uh, Chrysalis, what’s…?”
The queen came closer, rubbed her warm chitin against his scales. “It’s made from love, of course. From my… personal stores. Would you like a little more?”
“Um…” He could swear her nipples were smiling at him. “No.”
She sneered. “Suit yourself.” Drones surrounded her as she turned away, not noticing Spike’s faint gagging.
Another burst of chirps. Spike felt something shift in the changelings, their eyes turning to him. The queen spoke, lips pulled back from her fangs. “Drones, it seems our guest has finished his meal. You know what to do.”
The changelings crowded around him, wings buzzing like power saws. Spike started to prepare his dragonfire.
“Hey, wait, I thought this was just—” They came closer. “—just a visit. What are you doing? Stay ba… ba… ahhhh.” One of the drones jumped on his back, kneading his muscles with strong hooves. A sextet of larger changelings massaged his shoulders, while the smaller nymphs licked the sand from between his scales.
“Aids digestion,” the queen muttered.
“That feels… gooood.” He felt rough tongues, probing into all the little crevices he couldn’t reach and scraping out gunk. One of them found an old Daring Do action figure stuck in a crack.
“Hey, I thought I lost that!” The drone licked it clean, fixed a broken joint with some slime, and returned it to Spike. “Thanks, uh…”
Chrysalis answered. “A5AF-5671. Asaf, to his friends.”
So, changeling names are just shortened—“A little higher, get that… ah…”—versions of their acronyms.
Spike craned his neck to the drone. “Well, thanks, Asaf.” He felt a little gasp go through the horde. “Uh, this doll… erm, collectible action figurine was my favorite toy as a—yeah, right there, that’s the spot—as a hatchling.”
He chortled, knocking a few drones off his back. “Whoops, sorry, guys. Just thinking, I was a hatchling just like you once. Guess I have more in common with changelings than I thought.” He saw a grin flash across Chrysalis’s face as she stepped closer. Her tongue ran across her chapped lips, moisturizing the little wounds she’d suffered from sandstorms.
The queen’s tutors had told her ponies smiled to put others at ease. They failed to mention that this did not work when smiling meant exposing rows of fangs, each of which had a hollow core capable of injecting potent aphrodisiacs and tranquilizers.
Yes. This dragon would do. With him, her children would never know hunger again. They would feed, they would suckle, they would grow.
“We do, Spike. Drones, bring him the crown.” Spike heard shouts of glee from every changeling in the room. They chittered something to themselves, but Spike couldn’t decipher it.
He stopped playing with his doll long enough to talk to the queen. “The crown? What’s going on?”
Chrysalis tossed her mane back. “Why, all that’s left is to formalize the marriage, of course. Unless you’d rather elope? We could…” She stopped when she saw Spike’s gaping mouth and horrified expression. “What? You’ve done everything a prospective husband would on a date.”
A drone flew up to straighten the queen’s tiara. “No creature would enter the hive of an enemy without a conquering army beside them. You, however, came alone.”
She continued. “You call my children by their familiar names, names used only by relatives. A stranger from another hive would have called my son A5AF-5671, but you did not.” She gestured at the action figure. “You accepted a gift from my brood, without first checking to see if it were booby-trapped. That is a sign of trust, and trust is the foundation to any relationship, is it not?”
Spike raised an eyebrow.
“Okay, except that all of my prior relationships were built on lies and deceit, but let’s ignore that for now.”
Hornlight refracted from her wings as she flew up to Spike’s eye level. “You have eaten our food, tasted of the love from my own stocks. Why, you’ve come as close to suckling from my side as any creature of your considerable size could.” Her hoof caressed his snout, Spike’s breath whistling through the holes.
“It is clear that you do not hate me. By process of elimination, you must love me.” Behind her, a trio of drones scurried forward with the crown. “By changeling law, you are my rightful husband.” She saw the confusion in his eyes. “Think of the good we could do! Why, with a dragon’s help, we could grow our drones to a giant’s size!”
Spike gulped. “I don’t know…”
She ran hooves and wings over him.
“I just don’t see how…”
Black oil crept from the corners of Chrysalis’s eyes.
“But… your hive has not exactly been the greatest ally of Equestria.”
“That could change! We’re changelings, that’s what we do!”
Was she… crying?
“Um, I’m sorry, Chrysalis, but…” Wait, what was that about growing the drones? The glimmer of an idea flickered through Spike’s brain. That… that could be a pretty good gift. All sentimental and sappy, and I know Twilight loves snuggles.
“You know what? Fine. Bring the crown.”
Spike felt a growing pressure as thousands of drones hugged him at once.
“Um, Chrysalis?”
“Call me Chryssy.”
“Why does the crown have eyeballs? And why is it winking at me?”
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That last line disturbs and amuses me far more than it should.
Well, pity is a form of empathy, which is a kind of love, I suppose. After a fashion, anyway. You take what you can get.
Headgear goes on the bedstand. Wink wink, nudge nudge, say no more.
Why WOULDN'T The crown have eyeballs to wink at you with Spike?
Spike, all I can say for you is this:
cdn.meme.am/instances/500x/47567611.jpg
I love Spike, he's awesome... even if he's underutilized in the actual show. But, hey, that's what we're here for.
... *has terrible typing due to rolling on the ground, laughing*
Seriously, each consecutive chapter is even more hilarious. Even if this one also had some sadder moments.
... The crown is just another changeling, isn't it?
7252490 It... might be.
Ohhh, you the man Spike! Take the opportunity, even if it's probably the craziest thing you've ever done.
Oh Spikey, eyeballs are in this year. Rarity would be so upset to know that you haven't kept up with the latest fashions.
For the very best in eyeball headwear, visit The Cornea Corner, where they make things of such beauty that there isn't a dry eye in the house!
Here we see an example of their wares. For additional personal style, the customer may choose the colour of the eyes themselves!
hydra-media.cursecdn.com/pathofexile.gamepedia.com/4/48/Crown_of_Eyes.png?version=1773c9bbfe729c50fd7b427defbf762f
Not only are their goods stylish, reasonably priced, and self moisturising, but they also have additional health benefits, such as aiding in rapid weight loss!
hydra-media.cursecdn.com/pathofexile.gamepedia.com/7/78/The_Watcher_card_art.png?version=ff916402b14782c99a03dca4bbef4602
Of course, Spike, what else...
Wat? I don't even... Wat?
Nice chapter.
But how would egg-making even work, with this size difference?
Well, I'm sure Chrysalis already has a plan for this.
Well, at least they havent brought out the small blue pill yet Spike.
7252545
Spike did have a way to grow Twilight in the prequel. Well, sequel, technically. Probably a reverse process too. And y'know, changelings. Probably very flexible.
You are awesome! Another great chapter.
And an interesting way of thinking when choosing a mate by, Chrysalis, and the feeding method was a real surprise.
The eye crown is something to. Your doing, Spike X Chrysalis, shipping lover proud!
Wut?
"He could swear her nipples were smiling at him."
Creepiest MLP line of the week! Of course, I don't read the sexual fetish stories, so what do I know?
Beware the crowns with eyes Spike...
vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/en.futurama/images/7/7e/Brainslug.jpg/revision/latest/thumbnail-down/width/284/height/223?cb=20090504195508
:| Uh oh. *hooks up generator to sun, kickstarts sun* ...There we go. Sunbutt, don't do that, you have one job when it comes to this thing.
Chrysalis' constant seduction of Spike is friggin' creepy....
But they're MADE for each other!
Because crowns are one of the changeling sub-species of course. You should know this Spike, after all how many different ones did you note on your way through the hive?
How much stuff is on Spike's back anyway? Probably no books (Twilight wouldn't allow that), but Rainbow Dash wouldn't be happy about that Daring Do doll, er, action figure.
Oh... xD
Oh Spike, it's not that kind of crown!
Keep going! ;)
Just... what
, plenty of 
Also
Reads title.
Hey~
Of course! It all makes sense!
This is actually something I would expect Luna to say.
The things we do for love.
And that crown is totally trying to steal your man Chrysalis, better keep an eye on it.
I hope spike has some idea of what he is getting into, rather big commitment in order to get twilight a present.
7253838 well it might be a present for Celestia too. Not having to worry about the changelings anymore.
ಠ_ಠ
Sometimes I wonder what goes inside some people's heads.
Then stuff like this makes me remember why I seriously don't need to know.
7252589
But this is the prequel. Spike got the grow-magic (at least partically) from the changelings. So he doesn't know about it yet.
That would make sense. If he had done that, Twilight wouldn't have accidently smashed a priceless gemstone to dust in the other story.
Yes, but that flexible?
7254017 A prequel is the story that was written first, not the one that comes first.
7254126
I don't want to sound rude, but you are wrong.
Source: Wikipedia
But I don't want to argue so I suggest we simply agree it's a good story.
7254126
Um...no. Not even close. A prequel is quite literally defined as "a work whose story precedes that of an earlier work." The word has never had anything to do with the order in which stories were written or released. It's always been a term specifically used to denote when the story takes place chronologically in relation to another story. "Star Wars: Episode I/II/III," for instance, are still prequels despite the fact that they were written and released years after the original trilogy, because whether or not something is a prequel is entirely dependent upon where it takes place in relation to other stories in the series rather than when they were made. If Hasbro released a new My Little Pony series fifty years from now that focused on the story of Celestia and Luna 1,000+ years prior to Friendship is Magic, then that would still be a prequel series despite the fact that it was written decades after FiM.
Huh and here I thought he'd resist more, though I suppose the desire to get a gift for Twilight overrode that... like a steamroller.
Hmm, that phrase sounded better in my noggin.
Oh? That crown is just what we could find around the cave spike, I believe it's called a head crap to some but don't worry I'm pretty sure it's not dangers. :3
The moment I saw the chapter title I thought something else was going to happen, but then I noticed the lack of a Sex tag.
Well, out of all the things I've read today this has to be up there on the weird scale.
7255044 Just wait till we get to the bachelor party.
7255054 Oh boy... I don't know if I should be scared or ready to laugh my head off.
7255563
1. Thanks!
2. I wouldn't call Chrysalis freaky, unless you want a changeling with a kitchen knife doing unspeakable things to you as you sleep.
7255569 Chrysalis is freaky.
And an icky cherngelerng. *Alondro tosses the gauntlet!*
Beautifully disturbing image. Well done
...
... 
... 
... 
...
7256636
7256611
EVERYTHING IS ALIVE.
THE WALLS HAVE EARS.
7247616 And what's that from? I haven't read THIS story yet, so I apologise if it's from here.
7252491
Wha-.... I don't... Just... Why?
A5AF-5671 = Asaf
Clever use of numbers as names. I had an idea for a story using that for changelings, like 20011 being "Twent Killoth Ellen", but didn't think of using hex notation. Fun so far!