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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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This is getting interesting...
I suspect you meant "punch"
This construction makes it look like "Some person" and "her" refer to the same person. I think it would be more clear if the second sentence was "It was loud, compounding the headache of a woman who sat nearby." (Also, you use loud twice; the first "loud" could be dropped without losing any meaning)
Hmm, so team JNPR is going to do RWBY's mission that ends up intercepting the White Fang bomb train. No disrespect to JNPR, but they're going to have a really rough time trying to do that without Zwei.
I figure that Mercury betrayed them in some way and Blake ensured that he got the Traitor's reward. Cinder probably snapped when her boytoy got eviscerated, hence the incineration.
6826937 Thanks for pointing those out! I'll fix 'em as soon as I can.
6826939 Maaaaaayybeee.....
Or, given how aloof Raven appears to be, Qrow could be using a different interpretation of "lost"
6826954 Psst~ here's another.
the drink finally taking it's toll
1. Its.
Interesting! I liked this. I look forward to seeing JNPR's side of things on Fanfiction! Let me know when it's up!
I wonder though...why did Mercury die??? And if he did, will he be featured in this story in the future? Hmm...
That was interesting but can we get a link to that story when it is ready
6827207 Of course! I'll let everyone know when it's ready.
6827210
When I red five deaths I was "What ?" Then I saw Mercury's name and remember you indeed kill him in your first prologue version. So his still dead... or is he.
I wonder why you thought that. We saw her during the final of season 2. Or did you thought Summer was his sister.
If it can help you getting facts right, there's a wiki on RWBY that you can use for info. http://rwby.wikia.com/wiki/RWBY_Wiki
Anyway nice interlude. Saw a mistake that slip by.
6827375 I knew that she was alive, but I didn't know that Qrow knew.
I'll fix that soon!
6827387
Ah ok. I wasn't sure why you conclude to this. For me it was obvious. Apparently it wasn't.
6827387 KO awesome chapter, hope Jaune and the others will do fine. Also that the rest of RWBY will fine each other soon.
Waiting eagerly for the next chapter.
6827135
It was in the original prologue.
6827646 Oh? Huh. I see.
All i have to say is.... Justice will be swift, justice will be painful, ju- too soon?
6828195 no
-stice will be DELICIOUS!
Its so weird not reading these on fanfiction.net. Though I'm curious to see how JNPR does, I'm more curious to see how Team RWBY deals with their "afterlife"
6826965 I had the same comment during editing where I've apparently missed a few things.
Feels, so many feels.
So, this is still season 5 MLP wise... Is team RWBY gonna get caught up in all the wibbly wobbly, timey wimey stuff in the finale? And will next chapter be Yang or Blake... It'd kinda be hilarious to see Blake found by Maud, or it may be interesting to see her found by Changelings...
6828886 Nope. We're still with Yang. Each arc has its own self contained plot while still being part of a larger story, and Yang's conflict starts next.
I like CMSN better, with the S coming from Emerald's last name, Sustrai. "Crimson" seems a tad more sinister than "Cinnamon" after all.
Oh, and my mistake... I thought we entered AU territory after Ruby, Weiss, Blake, Yang, and Mercury DIED!
On a second read through, I noticed many more errors. I'll fix these soon.
6852682 I'm rather proud of this chapter, mostly for the bar scene between Winter and Qrow. I like the idea of the two being friends that hate each other in a way (Volume Three will explain why) so having Qrow comfort Winter in his own way was a very special idea to me.
I just thought of something.
1) Mercury died in the same situation as Team RWBY
2) RWBY ends up in Equestria
Theory: Mercury also got relocated to Equestria.
Or am I just an idiot?
Called it!
Er.....AU territory? Also, PINKIE AND YANG. Additionally........MMMMOOOOOAAAARRRRRR!!!!!!! Good job writing these characters, by the way. Pretty dang close to the originals.
mycotopia.net/uploads/monthly_05_2011/post-32196-138193629565.jpg
6889908 Fret not, the next chapter is halfway done!
6876000 Thank you! I'm trying my best to keep everyone in character, so I'm glad to hear that I'm doing a good job!
And while we won't be seeing Pinkie Pie for a little bit, I do have some plans for her (Too bad we won't see her interacting with Nora!).
my reaction pre-season 3: wow so sad i'm glad this isn't cannon, the real show can only get this dark if they kill of Ruby!
after season 3:I was wrong, soooo wrong ARKOS!
Or…you know. Not. Kickboxing bastard deserves ALL the pain.
*Grumble*
Briefing: Giving information to someone before they go on a mission.
Debriefing: Getting information from someone after they return from a mission.
Crap. Author’s note beat me to the punch...
Eh. I probably wouldn’t be bothered if RT hadn’t developed the shit out of Qrow recently. But since this was written in 2016, I’ll cut you that one.