Teal Eyes

The soft lighting and calm quiet created a tranquil atmosphere inside the cottage. The sounds of animals could occasionally be heard, scurrying about or snoring.
None of this concerned you at the moment. The only thing you are interested in is the yellow Pegasus in front of you.

Her name is Fluttershy, and the two of you have been good friends for a while now. You had bumped into her today at the market, where she had kindly invited you over for tea; an invitation you happily accepted.

The two of you had been growing closer over time; you certainly enjoyed her company, and for the most part, she seemed to enjoy yours. Her friends had told you that she had been coming out of her shell a lot more since she'd met you. ‘Outgoing and confident’ they said. ‘A new Fluttershy – one who isn’t afraid to speak up’. Apparently she can now cheer loudly too. It brings you a surprising amount of joy to know that you are the cause of this positive change in your friend, even if you’re not sure why.

Fluttershy didn't abandon her shy and timid nature entirely though. Occasionally it would shine through, as if she had momentarily remembered it – she could sometimes be found quietly and needlessly apologising for things that she played no part in, for example.

You'd noticed she could even be quite bashful around you at times; if your hooves accidentally touched, she would quickly retract hers and withdraw behind her mane for a while. Sometimes she would start walking closer to you without noticing - something you didn't mind at all - until her coat brushed up against yours, after which she would keep a sizeable distance between the two of you. If you were honest, it was quite cute, although the distance always felt much larger than it actually was.

The two of you had been talking for hours about anything and everything – from bunnies and critters to stories of adventures that both you two and your friends had taken part in, as well as any other individual or shared interests you had.

"-and so only after humiliating ourselves and Rarity did we realise her original dresses were the best," she says, finishing her story. "I have a picture of us all in our dresses... somewhere... umm... ah! Here it is."

She picks up a framed picture from the mantelpiece and presents it to you. Six mares in gorgeous dresses are depicted posing together in the centre. The one you know best has a bright smile, her styled pink hair falling down the side of her face and contrasting perfectly with her yellow coat.

"You look beautiful,” you say, shifting your gaze onto her.

"Oh, u-umm..." she stutters, blushing a faint red and smiling sheepishly, "thank you. That’s… that’s very kind of you to say.”

You draw your gaze away from the photo as you notice her staring at you with an almost dreamy look in her eyes. You have caught her looking at you in such a way quite a few times while you’ve been at her cottage, as well as number of times in the past. Each time you would catch her doing it and turn to look at her, she would instantly divert her eyes somewhere else. This time, however, her gaze does not falter. For that matter, neither does yours. The world around you disappears as all you see are two swirling pools of teal, threatening to drag you into their depths.

Equestria returns to the plane of existence as Fluttershy shakes her head, as if suddenly realising what she was doing. She clears her throat before referring back to the picture, ignoring the slight tint of red on her cheeks.

"This was before the disaster the gala turned out to be," she explains. "By the end of the night, the whole event was in ruin, and our dresses were in tatters." She giggles a little as she replaces the picture and leads you over to her two sofas facing each other, in the middle of which rests a coffee table sporting two cup of tea and a plate of biscuits. “Princess Celestia enjoyed it though, believe it or not - apparently the gala is normally very boring. And we all had fun in the end… when we exchanged stories of how terrible our night was.”

You take a seat opposite each other and pick up your tea. “I wish I could’ve been there; I can’t imagine you causing any kind of damage or destruction.”

She smiles. “You’d be surprised.”

A comfortable silence falls over the two of you as you enjoy your drinks. Again you catch Fluttershy shooting glances at you, looking as if she's trying to decide whether or not to do something. After a while, she breaks the silence.

"I meant it, you know. You really are very kind," she says softly.

"I was only telling the truth Fluttershy; you did look beautiful in that picture."

"No, I don't mean just now; I mean always. You've always been so kind to me, ever since I’ve known you. You’re helpful and funny and caring and..." She trails off, looking down at her tea and taking a deep breath.

"Fluttershy..."

She looks back up at you, something similar to desperation present in her eyes. "I... I just..." She sighs and looks back down before continuing. "I just wanted to say... thank you."

You don't know what to say; silence and a concerned smile are all you reply with. Despite the fact she had just ladened you with compliments, you can't help but think she looks sad.

As she slowly reaches for a biscuit, the sound of a loud crash breaches the walls of the cottage. The two of you immediately turn to look out the window, only now noticing the pouring rain battering the glass. You only observe for a moment though, as you see movement in your peripheral vision; despite looking outside, Fluttershy is still subconsciously moving her hoof towards the biscuits.

Making a quick decision, and without moving your head or body too much, you silently place your hoof on top of the biscuits so that her hoof will meet yours. Some might view it as mean, considering you know what her reaction will be when she does, but hopefully it will shake her out of her sad demeanour.

Sure enough, the moment you feel a delicate warmth on the top of your hoof, a sudden yelp is heard and the warmth disappears. You look over to see Fluttershy attempting to hide a blush behind her mane and doing her best to look anywhere except in your direction. You only just manage to stifle a laugh at the cute sight.

It’s then that you notice the clock resting on the mantelpiece. As caught up as you were chatting, you had only been vaguely aware of the passage of time. As such, it’s gotten late, and now you’re going to have to walk home in darkness as well as rain.

Releasing a sigh, you stand up and make your way around the table and over to Fluttershy. She looks up at you curiously, the remnants of a blush still present on her cheeks.

“Thanks for having me over Fluttershy. It’s been a lot of fun, but I should be heading off before it gets any later,” you say, not attempting to hide the reluctance in your voice.

As you give her a quick hug, she stutters a reply. “O-oh, um… you’re welcome, i-it was nice to see you. You’re welcome back a-any time…”

You pull back from the hug and give her smile before walking over to the door. Upon opening it, the sound of heavy rain falling draws another sigh from you. It’s going to be a long walk home.

Before you take your first step through the threshold and into the bombardment of raindrops however, Fluttershy calls out to you.

“Wait!”

Turning back into the room, you see her standing there timidly but looking directly into your eyes all the same.

“I can let you go home in all that rain, you’ll catch a cold! Why don’t you stay here instead?”

“Don’t worry about me Fluttershy, I’ll be okay,” you assure her.

“Please?” As if sensing your next words, she adds “You won’t be a burden, I promise.”

You see a gleam of hope, and possibly something else, resting in the depths of her teal eyes.

“I’d… I’d really like it if you stayed.”

There’s no point thinking it over; you know you can’t turn down those gems.

"Alright, I'll stay," you concede, causing her face to light up. "I'll set myself up on the sofa," you say, trotting over to it.

"Oh no, you can take my bed, I'll sleep on the sofa."

"Fluttershy, you promised I wouldn't be a burden, which is exactly what I would be if I deprived you of your bed."

"Oh, but I insist!"

"No, I insist. I'm not taking your bed away from you, Fluttershy," you respond, adamantly.

A few seconds of silence pass as the two of you look at each other, neither of you willing to budge on the issue.

An audible gulp from Fluttershy breaks the quiet as she turns her head away from you and hides behind her mane once more, eyes darting back and forth.

"Well," she mumbles, "my bed is pretty big... we could... um... s-share it?"

You look deep into her eyes. They hide behind her hair, shy and radiating fear, yet holding what appears to be a touch of hope.

You couldn't say no to them if you tried.

Fluttershy unexpectedly beams as you silently give a slight nod, before realising what she is doing and regaining her composure. After removing the sources of light on the ground floor, providing any remaining awake animals with a comfortable darkness, she leads you up the staircase towards her bedroom.

Little birdhouses of different colours line the ceiling, their occupants long lost to the grip of sleep. The hard hitting rain and odd creaking of floorboards below your hooves are the only noises to break the awkward silence you and Fluttershy are currently sharing. A lit candle rests on a bedside table; the bed itself sits with the headboard beneath a window, the pitter-patter of the rain upon it creating a sense of calm that will hopefully help you to fall asleep in the odd situation you find yourself in.

Fluttershy wasn't joking when she said her bed was big; it's large enough that there should be enough space for both of you to have some breathing room. You both approach opposite sides of it, pausing as you exchange nervous glances.

With no small amount of shyness and apprehension, both you and Fluttershy climb into the bed, pull the duvet up and do your best to get comfortable in the awkward situation you find yourselves in, your bodies lying on your sides, facing one another.

An oppressive silence fills the air, save for the sound of the rain hitting the window, and for a while, your eyes search the room around you for anything of interest to look at, as even the thought of meeting the gaze you feel being directed towards you by the pegasus opposite causes your cheeks to heat up.

The silence is broken by the sounds of movement as Fluttershy rolls over and blows out the candle on her bedside table, removing the only source of light in the room and shrouding it in darkness before rolling back to face you.

The silence returns, but the pervading blackness of the night coupled with the stormy cloud cover prevents you from being able to see anything, including the mare in front of you. As such, you no longer find your eyes darting around in search of distraction; they are now pointing forward, seeing nothing, but for some reason, unable to close. As much as you'd like to fall asleep and escape any possible further awkwardness via the land of nod, something at the back of your mind tells you to stay awake. You're not sure why - perhaps you simply feel it would be somehow rude to fall asleep before your friend.

A sudden break in the clouds causes the moon to shine through the windows, basking the two of you in a silvery light.

As your sight returns, you once again see Fluttershy laying across from you, her head resting on her pillow and the duvet up to her shoulders. Her eyes meet yours, but this time, you make no attempt to divert your eyes again. You're not even sure you could if you wanted to.

In the light of the moon, Fluttershy simply glows. You'd always thought of her as pretty, but never before had you realised just how beautiful she was.

Her tender face resting against the pillow, caressed by her long pink hair... a small smile on her lips, Her shining teal eyes...

You are transfixed; something which does not go unnoticed by Fluttershy.

"What is it? Is there something on my face?" she asks, her smile exchanging places with a slight concerned frown.

Before you can stop yourself, you immediately reply. "No, I just... I never fully realised how beautiful you are."

Suddenly, she's upon you, her lips pressed against yours and her eyes clamped shut. A surge of warmth rushes through you from your mouth to your hooves, causing them to tingle slightly. Your body freezes and you mind goes blank as it tries to comprehend what's happening.

Before you can formulate a full thought, a loud clash of thunder forces its way through the windows. Fluttershy draws back instantly to her side of the bed, curling up into a ball and pulling the duvet over her head.

A few seconds pass as your brain catches up, and you shake your head slightly to wipe away your daze.

As you regain control of your senses, you notice a whimpering sound coming from in front of you. Shuffling closer to the lump under the duvet, you're just able to make out the sound of soft, incessant apologies.

"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry..."

She sounds weak and pitiful, and it breaks your heart. You can't bear to hear it.

Reaching over, you slowly pull the duvet down, revealing Fluttershy with her face pointing down and as close to her chest as possible, hooves covering her head as if she feared she was about to be beaten.

“I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry..."

You place your hoof underneath her chin and gently lift her head up. Her eyelids tighten at your touch, but with her face once more level with yours she peeks out from behind them.

“I-I’m sorry! I didn’t mean- I don’t know why- when you said- I’m- I’m-“

You silence her by gently touching her lips with your hoof. She continues to mumble behind it until her teal eyes lock with yours.

You remove your hoof, lean forward, close your eyes and delicately kiss her, much softer than she had done previously. You hear her give a muffled gasp at the contact, followed by a soft moan as she pushes her lips against yours.

After a few seconds, you pull back, her lips following yours until the two of you break apart.

You open your eyes. Upon Fluttershy's face rests a questioning look, mingled with apprehension. Her eyes, however, sparkle with a gleam of hope. You can easily tell that whatever your next words will be are of dire importance to her; they could bring untold amounts of joy to her or shatter her entirely. In a situation like this, you'd plan your next words carefully. Fortunately, you already know what you're going to say; the words come to you as if you'd said them a thousand times.

“You have nothing to apologise for Fluttershy. You have nothing to fear either – you could never do anything that would make me think less of you. Besides… I feel the same way.”

That gleam of hope in her beautiful eyes brightens. “You… you do?”

You give a small nod. “I don’t know why it took me so long to realise it, but…”

She leans forward, her hopeful eyes a pair of teal flames, eagerly anticipating what you say next.

“I love you, Fluttershy.”

She’s upon you once more, lips locked in a tight embrace with your own. This time there is no shock, no moment of surprise-induced paralysis; this time you respond to her with all your thoughts and all your emotions, channelling them into the kiss as you push back.

Somehow, you find yourself on your back with Fluttershy on top of you, pressing her body into yours as her tongue forces its way into your mouth.

How you got into that position doesn’t matter. The storm outside doesn’t matter. The world doesn’t matter. All that matters right now is the mare above you.

You’re vaguely aware that room is darkening, the moonlight being stolen away by the clouds.

That doesn’t matter either. You aren’t going to need it anyway.

7,409 views

148

Comments ( 35 )

Viewing 1 - 50 of 35
- Newest First
- Oldest First

TimbukTurnip

TimbukTurnip #1 · Jun 2nd, 2012 · 1 · ·

This god awful piece of messy writing is a failed experiement gone horribly wrong that I got tired of looking at and gave up on. In hindsight, considering I had not written sappy or second person before this, it was probably a bad idea to jump straight into both at once. Additionally, it was probably a bad idea to try writing something in the middle of exams.

I kept changing my mind between telling the reader what they should feel and letting them decide for themselves. I prefer the latter, as doing the former makes it feel less like a second person story and more like an oc story. Messed that up too though.

For some reason, I also seem unable to write a oneshot longer than 3000 words.

Despite all this, any criticism is still greatly appreciated. Considering how bad this turned out, I'll probably never try something like it again, but any comments and pointers people give all help me to improve, even if it's just by a little bit.

Distrance

Distrance #2 · Jun 3rd, 2012 · 1 · ·

685574

I always find it funny when writer's downplay their works in order to receive higher praise in turn that their fic is actually good..... and this was good. A commendable work, lad. Good job.

ThatHandsomeDevil

ThatHandsomeDevil #3 · Jun 3rd, 2012 · 1 · ·

685574
This writing isn't god-awful, it's bucking beautiful. The only criticism I can offer is the slight tinge of cliche-ness in the scene in the bedroom when the moonlight shines across Fluttershy. Your descriptions and the story itself were good, though, and quite heartwarming. Good show, lad

Thunder Facade

Thunder Facade #4 · Jun 3rd, 2012 · 1 · ·

just what i dreamt last night, are you god mister?

HeartBeat

HeartBeat #5 · Jun 3rd, 2012 · 1 · ·

this was beautiful!

Kody910

Kody910 #6 · Jun 3rd, 2012 · 1 · ·

Short, sweet, and played enough with emotions for it to work and be believable. I enjoyed this, and wouldn't mind seeing more from you.
As for pointers, more sensory details could help. What did the room smell like? How did the tea taste? How did the kiss taste?
Either way, this was good.

chavis54

chavis54 #7 · Jun 3rd, 2012 · 1 · ·

I think I'm love with another author
this was very nice!
good job mr turnip!

RichieDash47

RichieDash47 #8 · Jun 3rd, 2012 · 1 · ·

Good Written, kinda reminded me of a happy version of the Goosebumps show, but...
myfacewhen.net/uploads/3132-fluttershy-nigga-please.png

Himmler GZ

Himmler GZ #9 · Jun 3rd, 2012 · 1 · ·

685574 Definately not a failed experiment. Not close to that at all! You did a pretty good job!

Glassed

Glassed #10 · Jun 3rd, 2012 · 1 · ·

I have only one word that can describe this: Cute.
I loved it, short, sweet and freaking adorable!dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Bonbon_OMG_LOVE.png
-Glassed

BR #11 · Jun 3rd, 2012 · 1 · ·

I am so jealous of the main character.... oh wait, its me!!!

Johnjohns

Johnjohns #12 · Jun 3rd, 2012 · · ·

Don't say that. Your story is wonderful!

BronyPie

BronyPie #13 · Jun 4th, 2012 · · ·

Fantastic!

SigmatheAwesome

SigmatheAwesome #14 · Jun 4th, 2012 · · ·

That... was adorable. And quite well written. You seriously don't need to downplay yourself.

artsofallkinds

artsofallkinds #15 · Jun 4th, 2012 · · ·

This is Fluttershipping, so I already like it. It's well written, so there's a plus. I only wish it were longer. Not only because I like your writing, but because a full-fledged story that goes from "maybe more then friends" to "I love you" would never actually happen in < 3,000 words. Then again, this is shipping; the likelihood of it happening at all isn't exactly huge anyway. All things considered...
I was perfectly happy to read and enjoy your fic.
Total score: /
mylittleponycollecting.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/clapping.gif

ombranox

ombranox #16 · Jun 4th, 2012 · · ·

Stealing this from the reader a few spots before me, butmylittleponycollecting.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/clapping.gif . Well done, well done. Have some happy faces.

TimbukTurnip

TimbukTurnip #17 · Jun 4th, 2012 · · ·

691056 Actually, I downplay it so that people know what flaws I know it has and so don't waste their time pointing out things I already know, but instead (hopefully) use it to give me pointers on how I could improve those points.

If that makes sense. I know what I mean.

691102 694162 I was worried it would come out a bit cliche-y. I do need to work on finding new ways of describing things.

691130 Not typically

691140 Thanks for the tips! I'll keep them in mind for whenever I next write something. Hell, I'll probably come back to this and lengthen it at some point, including those pointers when I do so. This story is far too short at the moment.

691218 I never watched Goosebumps, so I'll take your word for it

That picture is great though.

692599 Indeed, its length is one of my main troubles with this story. Not just because of the reasons you put either; to date, the only thing I have written and uploaded on its own was the first chapter of a story that I've not yet continued past the second chapter almost half a year ago.

As I said above though, if I get some free time I plan to lengthen this story a bit. It will be far from perfect, but it will at least be over 3000 words and hopefully make everything seem just a tiny bit more believeable.

691133 691169 691278 691380 691611 691872 691934 694334
Cheers for the kind words! This story could've been a lot better, but I'm mostly content if at least some people liked it

Mr V

Mr V #18 · Jun 4th, 2012 · 1 · ·

Hm, tasty.
Like a fic version of candy.
I love those.

imapony

imapony #19 · Jun 5th, 2012 · 1 · ·

honestly if i dated a pony, it would be fluttershy. Great job
fluttershy: " Why thank you mister "
me: " ur just so awesome "

Pony Knight

Pony Knight #20 · Jun 6th, 2012 · · ·

You know most Fluttershy romance fictions that I have read which has only been 3 so far, I had personally thought this was going to be straight out sex. But it is nice to read a story like this that just has that awe feeling for the main or all characters.

So please take it from me this story is just freaking awesome.iambrony.jsmart.web.id/mlp/gif/my-little-pony-friendship-is-magic-brony-then-and-now.gif

AIRFIGHTER

AIRFIGHTER #21 · Jun 6th, 2012 · · ·

good this ain't a clopfic or else google.com/imgres?hl=en&biw=1366&bih=667&gbv=2&tbm=isch&tbnid=QyXNZQJL8dd83M:&imgrefurl=http://www.backyardchickens.com/t/547485/mlp-fim-fanclub/180&docid=nOzPxBaMkzLXlM&imgurl=http://www.backyardchickens.com/forum/uploads/64972_fus_ro_dah.png&w=625&h=494&ei=AbLPT6auJoHi2gXYscjLDA&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=591&vpy=149&dur=2780&hovh=200&hovw=253&tx=128&ty=105&sig=103946476326524002850&page=1&tbnh=140&tbnw=177&start=0&ndsp=19&ved=1t:429,r:2,s:0,i:78

BorderPatrol

BorderPatrol #22 · Jun 13th, 2012 · · ·

I liked it I hope you continue it.

TimbukTurnip

TimbukTurnip #23 · Jun 13th, 2012 · · ·

704132 706071 I honestly freaked myself out a bit when I wrote the ending scene, so even if I had wanted this to become a clopfic, I never would've been able to do it

740735 I have no idea how I would continue this if I ever chose to. I intend to lengthen this at some point when I have free time, but beyond that, I have no plans for it. Maybe in the future I might do stories like this for the rest of the mane six or something, but who knows.

ThisAccountisDead420