Are you tired of edgy stories cutting you? Need a break from all that? Come laugh or cry at these puppies. (No actual puppies here.)
Spike has always dreamed about becoming a knight... but when he finally gets this chance will he burn out from all the hard work and training? Can he overcome the trials ahead in his journey to become the greatest knight in all of Equestria? Will he get actual advice from others? Is he even brave enough to be a warrior? The drawing is by Ricardo Frantz.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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So constructive criticism? Feedback? What do you guys think of it so far?
6628919 How about having more than 1 chapter be over 2,000 words long?
Having every chapter be around 1,100-1,500 words long is too short, you'd be better off combining several chapters together to create a better flow in your story.
This is a multi-chaptered story, chapters should have their own self-contained scenes as it were. They should have meaningful conclusions, or good cliffhangers to help readers along as they transition from chapter to chapter. Having chapters being too short just messes with their immersion, and that is among the worst things you can do to readers.
6631998 Thank you for the feedback. I will combine short chapters from now on so the immersion isn't broken.
Seems like a fun story and ofcoures I'le keep reading but for the flow of the story it would be nice if you wrote how he came to the dissision of wanting to become a knight what was the his breaking point. And sorry if you already explained that but whats with Celestia's potty mouth? (Not trying to be a jerk here but I think this story has potential )
7460389 I went back and fixed that plot point. And to further answer your question. She curses because she wants to let loose every once in a while. She is tired of being all prim and proper all the time. For the question about Spike, He is tired of being bottom of the barrel when it comes to solving problems in Equestria and defeating the villain of the week. He wants to have a bigger impact on Equestria. So he figures that becoming a knight will solve that problem.
Are you going to continue the story?