50% through, so far so good. The whole "IRON WILL" thing I did not see coming at all. Personally I think you're the first to use iron will. idk, but so far I'l liking this. I had to re-read chapter 3 to refresh myself. So I've read quiet a bit today, whew I need a nap.
1342620 all will be revealed, besides atm orion is too scared to ask silver out even if its obvious to everypony hes into her in a big way. *spoiler* it will take something big to make the wise cracking colt admit to his feelings and pony up so to speak. btw ive had a random message saying orion is too strong... not convinced myself as this chapter he nearly died twice, what you guys think?
1344606 Strong? Physically no. Is he very well equipped? He now has a minigun that shoots AP rounds 24/7, a sniper rifle that I am guessing has some other enchantments on it (maybe fire), a magic laser sword, a customized PipBuck with an AI and now SATS, Plus he has that freaky snow power. And then he is friends with a steel ranger with a Gauss rifle, a gun obsessed mare who can fix and upgrade almost any weapon, and has an alicorn filly that has a crush on him. Oh, and he just made friends with a minotaur (one of the strongest, if not the strongest, creatures in the wasteland), and an entire group of Reavers. And this is only 4 chapters in. If his power continues to increase at this level, he is going to eventually get a cybernetic augmentation that allows him to fire balefire bombs with his eyelids. He himself isn't strong, he just seems to stumble upon the most powerful loot in the world, and meet some of the most powerful people in the area. That could be attributed to his luck, but still. Good story though, and nice chapter.
1351550 lol well hes got some nice gear ill admit. Vengeance isnt a minigun though, its two assault carbines fitted with drum magazines. Silver is pretty powerless, i mean her magic is a weak healing spell and the ability to teleport another pony all of three feet his snow power is pretty much basic Pegasus weather magic on a smaller scale. as for the luck? well his talent is blind luck not good luck... not to give too much away but his luck can and will turn.
Very nice chapter. I didn't saw Iron Will in FoE so far, that was nice. The dress thing? Great. Orion recording Ironclad? Brilliant. But there are some things in this story I have issues with. First... I can't help but see Orion as a little bit of a mary sue character. Sure, I like this story, but reading about a blank flank that takes out an alicorn... Sure, he was incredibly lucky, but still, he had killed one of the most dangerous enemies on the wasteland. He has some really unique and IMO overpowered EQ for such a young and new to the wasteland character. I'd understood if this story was, I don't know, a 100 000 words long and Orion was a high-level character. But he is not one. I just sit here, reading the 4th chapter, asking myself "What will be next? A power armor? Cybernetics? Maybe whole army of fanatic hellhounds worshiping Orion as a god?". Also... he's a teenager who was brutally pulled out from his comfortable life in the pod to cruel wasteland... and he just kind of shrugs it of. Like he doesn't care. It's quite weird, if you ask me. I doubt he's just too stupid to understand what happen, so... I think there will be a point in the story when he will break. Even if this whole "not caring" thing is kind of a young mind defense system (I hope you know what I'm talking about), it can't be perfect. He's just to happy. He's living in a world full of danger, he had killed ponies, his parents are dead... You know what I mean, right? Okay, his special talent is blind luck. But so far it seems like his SPECIAL stats in luck is 20. Steel Ranger with a Gauss who treats the little pegasus like a young brother? Seriously? On the other hoof, it's a very nice story, and I will contiune reading it. Please, don't take this as an attack or a "I don't like it, it's bad" message. Story is good, only... it could be better. Especially when it comes to Orion's luck, skill, firepower and increasing impossible (imo), eternal good mood. Just one more thing, if you're still reading this. A common spelling mistake among English native speakers... In many situations you should write "you're", not "your". Just saing. Woah, I wrote quite a lot in here. Sorry for bad English (it's not my first language...) and good luck with writing more of this. It's a good story, and I hope it will become even better ;-)
1360645oh dont worry dude, his insane luck is there for a reason. Blind luck, hes been on the good end for a while and got alot out of it. how bad you think things will get when that luck turns the other way?
i started to read this a couple of months ago and i was hooked first chapter like you i am a noob writer and i havent done shit with my story but i hope this gets updated soon
1725140 the biggest issue you will have dude is harsh critics. one very talented writer kind of took me under his wing and gave me a lot of great advice. i love that you like my writing dude, but dont lose faith in your own. find a style thats fun to write and you will rock it like a boss
1787625 well im pretty close to finishing the current chapter but my free times almost non existent right now with work. personal path... well lets just say something is coming up that's gonna be epic, if i can pull the writing off lol
Hooooooooly crap that's a lot of words! It might take me a few days to get through this, but I'm pretty sure I can do it.
1332927 i did warn you in another blog it was twice the normal size
still when you see the amount of stuff in there...
and the guest star...
1332970 PINKIE WHYYYYYYY!!!!!??????!!!!!!!
50% through, so far so good. The whole "IRON WILL" thing I did not see coming at all. Personally I think you're the first to use iron will. idk, but so far I'l liking this. I had to re-read chapter 3 to refresh myself. So I've read quiet a bit today, whew I need a nap.
1339432 well i needed somepony with a big personality and who fits the bill better. plus hes freaking huge!
1342620 all will be revealed, besides atm orion is too scared to ask silver out even if its obvious to everypony hes into her in a big way.
*spoiler* it will take something big to make the wise cracking colt admit to his feelings and pony up so to speak.
btw ive had a random message saying orion is too strong... not convinced myself as this chapter he nearly died twice, what you guys think?
1344606 Ehh I would just say that he is very, and I mean VERY, lucky....
1344606
Strong? Physically no. Is he very well equipped? He now has a minigun that shoots AP rounds 24/7, a sniper rifle that I am guessing has some other enchantments on it (maybe fire), a magic laser sword, a customized PipBuck with an AI and now SATS, Plus he has that freaky snow power. And then he is friends with a steel ranger with a Gauss rifle, a gun obsessed mare who can fix and upgrade almost any weapon, and has an alicorn filly that has a crush on him. Oh, and he just made friends with a minotaur (one of the strongest, if not the strongest, creatures in the wasteland), and an entire group of Reavers.
And this is only 4 chapters in. If his power continues to increase at this level, he is going to eventually get a cybernetic augmentation that allows him to fire balefire bombs with his eyelids.
He himself isn't strong, he just seems to stumble upon the most powerful loot in the world, and meet some of the most powerful people in the area. That could be attributed to his luck, but still.
Good story though, and nice chapter.
1351550 lol well hes got some nice gear ill admit. Vengeance isnt a minigun though, its two assault carbines fitted with drum magazines.
Silver is pretty powerless, i mean her magic is a weak healing spell and the ability to teleport another pony all of three feet
his snow power is pretty much basic Pegasus weather magic on a smaller scale.
as for the luck? well his talent is blind luck not good luck...
not to give too much away but his luck can and will turn.
Very nice chapter. I didn't saw Iron Will in FoE so far, that was nice. The dress thing? Great. Orion recording Ironclad? Brilliant. But there are some things in this story I have issues with. First...
I can't help but see Orion as a little bit of a mary sue character.
Sure, I like this story, but reading about a blank flank that takes out an alicorn... Sure, he was incredibly lucky, but still, he had killed one of the most dangerous enemies on the wasteland.
He has some really unique and IMO overpowered EQ for such a young and new to the wasteland character. I'd understood if this story was, I don't know, a 100 000 words long and Orion was a high-level character. But he is not one.
I just sit here, reading the 4th chapter, asking myself "What will be next? A power armor? Cybernetics? Maybe whole army of fanatic hellhounds worshiping Orion as a god?".
Also... he's a teenager who was brutally pulled out from his comfortable life in the pod to cruel wasteland... and he just kind of shrugs it of. Like he doesn't care. It's quite weird, if you ask me. I doubt he's just too stupid to understand what happen, so... I think there will be a point in the story when he will break. Even if this whole "not caring" thing is kind of a young mind defense system (I hope you know what I'm talking about), it can't be perfect. He's just to happy. He's living in a world full of danger, he had killed ponies, his parents are dead... You know what I mean, right?
Okay, his special talent is blind luck. But so far it seems like his SPECIAL stats in luck is 20. Steel Ranger with a Gauss who treats the little pegasus like a young brother? Seriously?
On the other hoof, it's a very nice story, and I will contiune reading it. Please, don't take this as an attack or a "I don't like it, it's bad" message. Story is good, only... it could be better. Especially when it comes to Orion's luck, skill, firepower and increasing impossible (imo), eternal good mood.
Just one more thing, if you're still reading this. A common spelling mistake among English native speakers... In many situations you should write "you're", not "your".
Just saing. Woah, I wrote quite a lot in here. Sorry for bad English (it's not my first language...) and good luck with writing more of this. It's a good story, and I hope it will become even better ;-)
1360645oh dont worry dude, his insane luck is there for a reason. Blind luck, hes been on the good end for a while and got alot out of it. how bad you think things will get when that luck turns the other way?
I diiiiid it! And might i say this was a very lovely chapter! I liked it a lot, look forward to the next one bro. /)
1386279 thanks :D
1386683 thanks man!
thanks to noakwolf too, its kind of mindblowing to a noob writer like me to get these kinds of feedback
He doesn't like his new dress?! Orion have not learned the golden rule: Expensive stitches gets the bitches.sphotos-h.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/230561_419528764761681_1499792419_n.jpg
Good chapter, finally finished.
Where the story heads now, I have no clue.
With the way Orion's luck is going, he's probably going to find a Luna plushy somewhere...
He'd probably end up giving it to Silver as a present, too.
LOVED IT *ahem* sorry but man, you need to make more of this series! this is most definitely fluttershy approved
1531338
im trying dude but im suffering with pneumonia atm, life's out to get me lol
1531379
Get Well man! hopefully youll be back on all 4 hoofs soon
i started to read this a couple of months ago and i was hooked first chapter like you i am a noob writer and i havent done shit with my story but i hope this gets updated soon
1725140 the biggest issue you will have dude is harsh critics. one very talented writer kind of took me under his wing and gave me a lot of great advice. i love that you like my writing dude, but dont lose faith in your own. find a style thats fun to write and you will rock it like a boss
1787625 well im pretty close to finishing the current chapter but my free times almost non existent right now with work.
personal path... well lets just say something is coming up that's gonna be epic, if i can pull the writing off lol