Princess Luna's foray into an independent village near Equestria's border turns up an old friend of Twilight's. And a new hope for Luna.
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articunos bitch
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90% of the story is undeserved ripping on every princess but Luna, by a character who has little idea about what she's talking about, while bending what actually happened in the series beyond recognition to try to support it, and the story expects us to agree with it?
Downvoted, I'm sorry to say.
6917315 Thank you for an honest review.
I see it as a ripping that should have happened and no-one else gave, and or even sees. What rips bothered you the most? I admit I added a few noncanon details that shown new light on them, but I do want to make this better if you want to help.
6917315 Lol. Undeserved. You might as well have not read the story, because you clearly didn't understand a single word.
6917422
Well, first, there was the stuff completely made up:
1: Luna moving the stars (when the show has shown that the stars just stay there like in real life, and she only moves the moon).
2: Celestia rotating the planet (when not only does she move the sun and not the planet, but her rotating the planet would remove the need for Luna to move ths moon in tbe first place).
3: Cadance apparently being written as a psychopath, with the same going for Celestia since she knows of what Cadance is doing.
4: Celestia supposedly rejecting Changelings for hundreds of years, just to invent a reason for her to look bad.
Then, there's the things that Trixie has no idea what she's talking about, or making criticisms that make no sense:
5: Trixie blaming Celestia for getting more praise than Luna did, when that's the fault of the citizens, not Celestia, and claiming that Celestia purposefully ignored Luna for hundreds of years (yeah right).
6: Trixie calling Nightmare Moon a "temper tantrum" amd that she was having a "private discussion" with Celestia, when Nightmare Moon was actually trying to murder her sister, take over the nation, and deprive Equestria of the sun forever.
7: Trixie claiming that Celestia's use of the elements was unjust; what was she supposed to do, let herself be murdered and risk subjecting her citizens to eons of tyranny? That's ridiculous.
8: Trixie claiming that the Changelings only wanted to eat, when it's extremely obvious that Queen Chrysalis wanted power for its own sake, not that she wanted to feed her poor, starving subjects. As obvious as it already was that Chrysalis was evil and power-mad in her debut, the recent finale explicitly confirmed it.
9: If Twilight had known what Celestia wanted her to do for Nightmare Moon, she would have failed, because she had no understanding of friendship, and would have started up interviews for the elements or something. You can't force friendship, and that's exactly what Twilight would have tried to do.
10: There is a huge difference between what Twilight was doing for Saddle Arabia, and what Trixie was doing in Boast Busters. Twilight was using her powers to harmlessly entertain other ponies (horses?), while Trixie was self-aggrandizing herself, lying about her abilities, and humiliating her audience under the guise. Twilight did nothing wrong there.
11: Celestia didn't "give" Twilight her wings; Twilight transformed herself into an alicorn using Starswirl's completed spell to realize her destiny. Twilight was destined for alicornship, as shown by the Tree of Harmony, and she earned her princess status by demonstrating exemplary leadership, strength of character, and service to the country.
12: Twilight hasn't been a yes-man (yes-woman? Yes-pony?) to Celestia since The Crystal Empire, when she learned how to go against Celestia's commands if necessity called for it. Twilight often goes along with what Celestia says even now, but that's because they're friends, and Twilight trusts her as both her senior in age and in princess-ship. There's no evidence that Cadance is such a pony any more than Twilight is, either.
Then, Trixie completely ignores all of their good traits, actions, and sacrifices they made for the good of others, like how Celestia dearly loves her sister, had to put up with personally banishing her for a thousand years, and in that time frame, shouldered both Luna's and her own duties while still leading Equestria, a beacon of harmony and happiness (barring the odd invasion), how Twilight led the force that saved Equestria multiple times, formed a network of close friends, and brought several actual sociopaths the light of friendship, or how Cadance saved the country from being sucked dry by power-hungry bugs and led the crystal ponies out of their oppression under Sombra into happiness.
Finally, I noticed Trixie completely neglected to mention Luna almost dooming Equestria when she created the Tantabus. I mean, she kept talking about things she has no way of knowing the details of with so much confidence, she should know about that too, especially since all of Ponyville witnessed it, right?
They're not perfect (Celestia screws up her plans sometimes, like with Tirek, Twilight is high-strung and a bit neurotic, and Cadance seems kind of useless against threats to Equestria when her domain of love isn't suited for the job), but all four princesses are wonderful bastions of good moral fiber and competence, and are ponies almost any pony could use as role models.
6917455
I understood that the story invented so many crimes and foolish mistakes out of whole cloth for the three princesses that they're not even the same characters anymore, and that it used a half dozen other misconstrued or biased tellings of events to make additional invalid criticisms.
It'd be no different if I made a story where Luna regularly killed and ate foals, then had someone call her out on it. The Luna in my story isn't even close to the actual Luna, nullifying the criticisms of the show character entirely.
6917579 1: I haven't seen that the stars are stationary. I might have missed something, but that's something I made similar to our world.
2: Would it make more sense to rotate the planet on it's axis or spin the sun around the world in a 93 million mile radius every day? Yeah, surely that makes more sense. The moon still goes through it's phases, and our world turns but the moon still rotates around our world.
3: My brother/sister scene was shamelessly ripped off from Twilight's flashback of Cadance's spreading love. We knew nothing about the ponies she cast her spell on, and who knows what she did to them. If she's doing you would think Celestia knows about it.
4: I find it hard to believe the Changelings had nothing better to do then invade Equestria in a plan that made no sense. A large scale invasion to feed on love smells like desperation. I gave them a reason to pick a bone with Celestia.
5: If Celestia wasn't ignoring Luna then why did she offer Luna her friendship upon her return? That tells me she was nothing like a friend. And if they were living and working together, there were countless opportunities to be friendly, so why does she offer unless she didn't give Luna any?
6: Luna snapped. She was as much a Princess as Celestia and no-one cared about her. She took her frustration out on Celestia, who she was jealous of. Maybe if Celestia stepped aside and let Luna rule alone she would have let her be. Also, we've seen an Equestria without sunlight for years. Vegetation is growing, ponies aren't freezing to death, it looks like a stable government, they even have tourist coming to the castle. Life without sunlight seems fine, if different.
7: Her use of the Elements was stupid. They are powered by Friendship(or whatever), and shouldn't be used by a single person. Celestia might as well have killed her sister and ruled for eons.
8: A queen is not supposed to find food for her people? Did you notice how thing the Changelings are? They're skin and bone. And, if her people were spurred by Celestia for centuries, she and the Changelings would have a judge and prejudice against all ponies. That doesn't make it right, but it's a motivation.
9: I did read somewhere the L. Faust said Celestia knew(without defining even to herself how) she had to send Twilight to Ponyville to stop nightmare Moon. You can't force friendship on someone, but Twilight had no interest in it(but she's in school, she does have studies, which do come before friends in school), and friendships is a basic social skill Celestia, Cadance, Mom, Dad and Brother should have taught her long before adulthood. And she did to various degrees depending on which Season you're in. Back on track, Celestia should have told Twilight 'make some friends, and dealing with Nightmare will be that much easier.'
10: That's a fair point. I can still see Trixie being bitter about it when it happens.
11: Twilight only got wings when Celestia cast that spell on her. And that whole episode was a clusterbuck with a few good songs(True, True Friend only had good lyrics when Applejack sang a different verse to the same tune, the way a song should be instead of the chorus five times in a row). Starswirl's spell switched the Elements, that's it. And since when are spells cast verbally? It's always been lighting of a horn. What does the tree of harmony have to do with it? And Cadance's baby is already an alicorn in the leaked footage, how does that fit in?
12: Twilight has worshiped Celestia since seeing her raise the sun as a Blank Flank. Cadance is a unrepentant, shameless Mary Sue. It's easy to imagine them as Yes-Men.
This is my real reply below. I hope I have explained myself well enough. Thank you for your input again.
The Tantabus: I actually wrote this after noticing something: Luna's creation of the Tantabus was beyond stupid. And if the subject of her guilt ever came up in a discussion with friends, they would tell her not to be hard on herself. That they forgive her(Celestia was up again in seconds 1000 years ago, and no-one was hurt from Nightmare's return, so where's all this misery she caused?) and she should forgive herself. She never did until the episode, telling me she never spoke about it.
Celestia offered her friendship, implying they would spend time getting to know each other better and having adventures and whatnot. Four months later(Nightmare Night), she was still talking with Canterlocks. I suppose it was not to be used between Princesses since she didn't use it when she returned. Why did Celestia not tell her "We don't shout at the public anymore?" Did they spend any time together? And that was the first time Twilight had seen Luna since her return. Celestia told her 'make some friends', but I suppose Luna was not to be included? Twilight had five good friends, did she not have time to befriend a Man out of Time, a pony who knew no-one except her jailer from all those years ago, someone socially awkward who needed a friendly face herself? How can Twilight possibly be a Princess of Friendship when she ignores the pony who needs a friend the most? A pony who lives with her teacher, who she writes to often? Did she never ask 'How's your sister doing?' THIS is the pony who bore the Element of Friendship? I had no clue how to include all this from Trixie's point of view, so I left out the main point I was trying to make: Celestia and Twilight are a pair of crappy pretend friends to Luna.
Tirek: That is actually something I think worked out exactly as planned, by Discord, with help from Celestia. The items the Mane Six got opened the chest and Twilight would not have figured even that out if Discord had not bookmarked them in their shared diary. Discord planned on Tirek trying to recruit and betray him, and knew Twilight could fight him to a standstill with all four alicorns' magic combined. He played Tirek and Twilight like violins.
Personally I'm intrigued by this story in the concept as a whole. While I do agree with Fwelin that ripping seems to be undeserved in the concept of character portrayal it's done perfect. Let me explain. We only see Trixie perspective of the whole issue and while she tries to be open minded she actually only receive info mostly from one source. Namely the ponies that have been wronged.
It's clear she never once had brought this matter before with either of the 3 other princess. So a perspective of the opposite is never added. That leaves only guess work to fill the gabs and of course that reveals a rather negative image on the whole thing. I would love to see sequels from this story and see how this all will play out. But only if positive and negative things are balanced out. In other words don't make the stories good v.s. evil but add lots of gray in it. If you catch my drift. Make it so that each of the princesses in their own minds can justify their own actions, yes sure ignorance is a major key here but if the author plays his cards right there could be more going then meets the eye.
If the author can make such an entire plot then consider me sold.
But as a single story so far? Hmmm I still give it a votes up. Because even from a single standpoint the arguments do hold water.
6917869
1: Whenever we actually see someone raise the sun/moon (Twilight in Twilight's Kingdom, Discord in Return of Harmony, Celestia/Luna in Princess Twilight Sparkle), the stars are always completely stationary. That means that Luna doesn't raise or lower them with the moon (nor does Celestia with the Sun).
2: When moving the sun is easy enough for a half dozen unicorns can do it (even if it permanently drains their power), I'd say that moving the sun is a lot easier than rotating the earth. It's also been specifically stated that Celestia raises the sun whenever it gets talked about it, and when Twilight had control of her magic, she was raising the sun and moon in a pattern that would be pretty ridiculous to imagine it being due to rotating the planet.
3: We don't know anything about them, but Cadance is a smart and good enough pony to know not to make ponies fall in love with each other willy nilly. I thought it was fairly obvious that she was merely helping two ponies in a relationship forget their argument for a while, given that she's not in jail or punished for doing what she does.
4: Why does it make no sense? They're predators to ponies, so taking over their nation so that they have an unlimited source of love whenever and wherever they want sounds like a great idea (if they can pull it off). Not once does Chrysalis ever talk about hunger when it comes to love; every time she mentions her goals, she talks about power. We don't even know if Changelings even need love to live; it's entirely possible that they can eat normal things, and eating love just makes them stronger.
5: Celestia offered friendship because Nightmare Moon just got finished trying to take over the nation (again!), and Luna could have been worried that she'd get punishment instead of acceptance. Celestia offering friendship was a sign that she had forgiven Luna completely, and makes no implication that they weren't friends before she turned into Nightmare Moon. Heck, Celestia was crying when she banished her sister; that's not something she'd have been doing if she wasn't close to her.
6: It was never said that no-one was paying attention to her personally; it was said that she got jealous because ponies were sleeping during her night, instead of being awake and productive during Celestia's day. None of that is Celestia's fault, since ponies are biologically designed to sleep during the night. Celestia abdicating just because her sister couldn't let her feelings of jealousy go is a horrible idea for many reasons (even ignoring that a ruler that tries to overthrow the current ruler just because they want to feel glorified isn't fit to be a ruler). First, Nightmare Moon is, mentally, different from Luna; for all Celestia knew, Nightmare Moon was going to abuse every pony until they spend hours exalting her night, and she banished Celestia, a completely innocent pony, into the moon just to get her out of the way. The only part of Nightmare Moon's rule we saw was her castle, which of course she's going to keep in good condition. Keep in mind that under her rule, the Everfree Forest had expanded greatly to cover Ponyville, which doesn't bode well for how much she actually cares about the rest of the country.
7: Somepony who was officially connected to have of them using them as a last resort to stop a tyrant is a lot better than the alternative. Celestia didn't have a choice.
8: Nothing whatsoever in either episode remotely implied that her people were hungry, or even that they need love to live. Her changelings were skinny because they're designed on bugs, not because they're starving; look at the perfectly happy Changeling in Slice of Life, who is just as skinny as all the rest.
9: Twilight had already been given a chance at real friendship many times before, but she spurned it every time (such as her Canterlot "friends", who she seemed to basically only barely put up with, if the picture of her reading and ignoring everything is anything to go by. It was clear by then that the only way Twilight was going to get true friends is if circumstances forced it; Celestia suggesting that she should get friends would have almost certainly been ignored by Twilight in her quest against Nightmare Moon (though it probably wouldn't have hurt her quest, either).
11: Celestia didn't cast any spells at all. Her horn wasn't glowing, she didn't say any incantations, and I believe the writers have said this as well. All she did was send Twilight the book and greet Twilight in the other realm to mentally prepare her for the next step in her life. Theincomplete version of the spell changed the elements of harmony, but Twilight cast it again after she completed it with her revelation after True True Friends. The completed version of the spell used the Elements of Harmony to transform her. What did the spell do when it was incomplete? It altered the true selves of her friends in a negative way. The completed version of the spell would thus alter the true self of someone in a positive way, and voila; Twilight became an alicorn after casting the completed spell. As shown by Twilight's cutie mark being on the Tree of Harmony in the central position, it's clear that, in terms of the Tree of Harmony, she was destined for something great. Spells can be cast verbally just as much as with the horn, as the series shows. Both the complete and incomplete version of Starswirl's spell were cast that way, and so was Inspiration Manifestation (which didn't light Rarity's horn up either). Cadance transformed herself into an alicorn, as well, with no assistance from Celestia. As for Cadance's daughter, what does that matter? We've known for a long time that alicorns can either be born (like is implied for Celestia and Luna), or they can ascend (like Twilight and Cadance). Cadance's daughter just means that alicorns can be born if at least one of their parents is an alicorn, and ascended alicorns count.
12: Twilight idolized Celestia ridiculously, and could easily be called a yes-man before The Crystal Empire, but she grew out of it as a part of her character development in that episode. Cadance has never been shown interacting with Celestia in such a way, and thus to claim it of her has no evidence behind it.
Old speak (like Luna was doing in Luna Eclipsed) is only used by monarchs like her when speaking to those who are their social lessers. They wouldn't have been using it in their conversations between the two of them, only when Luna speaks to normal ponies. Look at after Luna was cleaned of NMM; she spoke completely normally to Celestia, because she wasn't one of her subjects.
Whose to say that Twilight didn't ask about Luna? There are many friendship reports that are sent off screen that we never see, and Twilight does lots of things offscreen as well. For example, it's stated that Twilight met with her brother several during season 1 and 2 without us ever seeing it. Plus, Twilight was still learning about friendship in season one; she wasn't ready to become the Princess of Friendship until much later. Luna seems to have been very weak and fragile in her appearance in season one; perhaps she didn't feel ready to go outside of the castle and make friends with ponies other than her sister.
There is absolutely zero chance that Discord had planned the Tirek incident out, for many reasons. First, it was stated that the keys only manifest when said pony teaches a major lesson to somepony else; if Discord had planned it, it wouldn't have been an actual lesson, and the key wouldn't have appeared. Second, Discord isn't that in-control of his own emotions, as shown by Keep Calm and Fluter On, and Make New Friends but Keep Discord. It's easy to see that Discord was feeling completely genuine sadness, regret, and betrayal when he betrays the mane six and then gets betrayed in turn. He's a clever guy, but he has very little in terms of wisdom. Third, why would he or Celestia risk the kingdom to try to get the box open earlier? It's not like this was the last chance for Twilight to get her key, and Discord could have easily captured Tirek when they first met. Twilight getting the castle and map could have waited a couple months. There's also the fact that the Tree of Harmony's magic is the biggest counter in the series to Discord's magic; if he couldn't just open the box himself, how would he know what's inside it, and that it could defeat Tirek?
Nah, not really feeling it. Parts of it are strong like the potential nightmare fuel from Cadance's love spell since the scene we get of that she doesn't actually do any background check, she just uses it on what looks like a couple. Other parts aren't so strong, not to mention that it's implausible that Trixie would hear about some of these things, even in a link of Pinkie > Maud > Trixie. There's still other incidents in canon that could have been used to make a much stronger case, like say Celestia giving Twilight a crown presumably less than a year after Twilight cast a mind-control spell that ended up affecting most of a town, or the case of Cadance and Shining Armor becoming rulers of the Crystal Empire...because somehow.
I have my problems with this but overall it was a good use of my time to read
also
6917579
Was gonna post the same thing until I read your comment, I couldn't have said it better myself.
What?! BUT THE PRINCESSES ARE THE LAW!
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Wow, this is an amazing story! Somehow without any of us noticing, you managed to secretly replace the Great and Powerful Trixie with a duck!
[youtube=https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hLpgxry542M]
-Mass Effect 2, the marine sergeant dressing down the recruit on the Citadel
Oh my goddess why does every Trixie one shot say all the things I want to say!? *Spams the like button*
I love coming back to reread this exposure of the princesses. There are so few but I love the ones I read. Especially when they target the mane six or Sunbutt.
I've also read the comments seeing a lot of twilights' in the chat.