Chapter 1
The negotiations with the Forest States were going slow, and little progress was made to resolving the pressing issues. The disputed lands held little value outside of gas that Equstria had no interest in, and little water that the deer needed. That didn’t stop both from claiming it as their own, it simply lacked the passion or urgency many of these disputes were often associated with. Flying back to Canterlot after a day of talks, Princess Luna figured she should have something to eat if she didn’t want to be too grouchy arriving home. She was flying above the very territory she had bickered over all day when she noticed a small settlement.
The town couldn’t have held more than two hundred ponies. The sun was just setting now, she wouldn’t have to take time out to raise the moon for an hour or so according to her pocket watch, enough time for a bite to eat and a walk around town center. Princess Luna landed down the main road to avoid the fuss ponies normally went to when her sister or Princess Cadance arrived somewhere unexpectedly. She did get a unique reception, but not one she was accustomed to, nor understood.
Strolling past a couriers office silenced the two mares gossiping by the entrance while they narrowed their eyes at her. Her eye caught a curious poster advertising spell lessons, ‘Inquire at Sheriff’s Office.’ A pack of ponies gathered quickly around a well with their backs to it, almost as if they didn’t want Luna to draw from it, and a pegasis flew over her with what looked like a particularly heavy rain cloud threatening to burst. The Princess stopped in the middle of a road when she noticed the rude behavior she was getting from all sides, and found it trumped when a colt directly in front of her spit on the ground at her hooves.
A crowd gathered around her. Taking a deep breath she pressed onward until a mare stepped forward and ran around in front of her, spreading her wings. Her tan coat and dirty brown mane somehow reminded Luna of her sister from another time, her words did not. “My name is Combustible. You are trespassing in the town of Murky’s Dream. Leave at once Princess!”
Her voice did not falter, her eyes did not leave Luna’s. As bold as she bellowed, Luna would not be driven off so easily. “Good mare, I have not been in your fair village but a minute. Whatever have I done to deserve your contempt?” As much as she wanted to drive them to cower with her Canterlot Voice, there was bad blood here, and it would not do to tempt anything.
“We came here to get away from the Equestrian crown. We want no quarrel with you and have no business with you. You are not welcome here!”
An azure unicorn mare with a sliver mane stepped out of from the crowd and barked out, “Okay ponies, back to business! Go on, I’ll take care of our guest. You’ve had a long day, get some sleep.” She turned to stare face to face with Luna who was struck by a sense of déjà vu. “I’m afraid she’s right Princess. You are not a welcome sight here. I doubt you’re planning to cause trouble for us, but let’s keep things simple for everyone and just leave us alone. Okay?”
Luna tilted her head, and suddenly the answer came to her. “What is your name? The Great and Powerful Trixie I believe?"
The unicorns eyes bugged before her ears drooped and head tilted downward. “Princess,” she began. “I’m serious. You have to go. If you want to talk we can at my own home, but let’s get out of here now.” She threw her left leg around Luna’s right and teleported the two of them away.
Blinking, her eyes adjusting to the sudden darkness of the forest around them, Luna saw a small cottage before her as the door slid open on well-oiled hinges. Trixie stepped inside and sparked a gas lantern to life before lighting the fireplace and placing two cups on the table. “Come on in Princess. I’m sorry I don’t have much to offer, I don’t get visitors. I do have water, dried grass and some canned vegetables. Which strikes your fancy?”
“Do you happen to have maize? Or corn?”
“Two cans of maize coming up. I’m going to stick to grass myself. Do you want them warmed or room temperature?”
“Warmed would be nice. And if you are to host me I would like water as well.” Taking her seat on a white cushion worn to grey at the table, Luna took in the details of Trixie’s home: an unmade bed with bleach white sheets and a very thin pillow in the corner, a stone fireplace near the foot of the bed, the table she sat at stood in the middle two meters from the fire, a cluttered desk and several locked trunks dotted the corners, and a trapped door on the floor, presumably leading to a basement sat opposite the fireplace. The only pictures she saw were a poster for a traveling magician named Presto hung over the bed, and four photographs of Trixie and a mare she resembled over the fireplace from different stages of her life.
Trixie tossed several sliced carrots into a cooking pot sitting over the fire and began laying out plates and filling their cups with water. “So, you had something you wanted to ask me Princess Luna,” she asked cordially.
“Yes. I was asking if you were the Great and Powerful Trixie I heard about. Traveling magician extraordinaire?”
“No Princess. I was the Great and Powerful Trixie, but that is in the past, and just a stage name. My real name is Beatrix Lulamoon. My title now is Sheriff of the humble settlement of Murky’s Dream, or at least the closest thing we have to sheriff. You already met the mayor, Combustible. Despite the moniker and her attitude to you, she really does have a cool and collected head on her shoulders. That’s not a trait shared by most ponies in town, so that sets her, and she says myself apart. Short version is she decides who is allowed in town and who’s not, and what their limits are. She treats folks fair; I make sure folks treat each other fair, we try to get along. And it works for us for the time being.”
“Beatrix, could you tell me why I am one of those folks she does not treat fair? She said everypony moved out here to get away from the Crown.”
Pouring a recently opened can into the pot in the fireplace, Beatrix continued talking. “Princess, Murky’s Dream was founded by ponies who have some kind of ax to grind against you. By you I mean the Princesses and other ‘ruling class’ in general. There is no ‘ruling class’, I know, but that’s the mentality of this town. They see many governors and bureaucrats as their Ruling Class. Lording down from their ivory towers on high, above the law, ordering the serfs to collect food for them from their own fields, demanding coal for their railroads and lumber for ships, all stolen from the people, yada, yada, you know where this is going. Well, some ponies like to rebel against that with actions, some ponies accept their place as serfs, and some run away. This town is the last.
“For the record, I know their perception of you is not the case. Then you have your tax cheats and criminal elements. We don’t permit them to live here, they run further, into the Forest States. We don’t want their trouble, our issues are personal.”
“The Crown takes the law seriously. If governors or other state employees violate the trust of the people, we handle it in an orderly, transparent, swift and just fashion. What grievances have we overlooked?” Luna explained.
“Many, Princess.” Stirring the pot, Beatrix finished setting the table and took a seat across from Luna. “Let me tell you a story: One day, a certain mare who lives in this town was arguing with a certain stallion she knew in Canterlot. They were supposed to meet her mother for dinner and she wanted her hooves done first. He told her she wouldn’t have time to do that and meet up when they said they would. They went back and forth, and both of them have loud voices you see. It attracted the attention of a Princess, Mi Amore Cadenza to be exact. She cast her ‘love spell’ on her and this stallion. She instantly became infatuated with him. She didn’t get her hooves done that afternoon, nor did they see her mother that evening. They got a hotel room for the night and…The next day was the worst day of her life. The love spell lost its effect on them, and they remembered who they were. Luna, that stallion was her brother. A mare was arguing with her brother in public, full brother at that, the one she had known and looked up to all her life, and Cadance thought they needed some love. So she cast a spell knowing nothing about these two ponies.
“Princess, she loved her brother, as a brother! She’s so ashamed of what they did, she hasn’t been able to speak to him since. She gets letters from him now and then, and she just tosses them into a box unopened, and writes back that she can’t read them just yet. He was her best friend, friends argue. Brothers and sisters argue. Princess Cadance ruined her life, and did Faust knows what to him, and she continues doing it to this day. A Crystal Pony who was in town just last week said she keeps doing just that whenever she sees someone arguing, and she doesn’t limit herself the stallion/mare either. Anyone will do in her eyes. Do you think that’s acceptable behavior, for anyone? Least of all a Princess who ponies should be able to admire?”
Luna was dumbstruck. She had never seen Cadance do such a thing, but Celestia had mentioned she spreads love wherever she goes. That could not be what she meant, surely.
After pouring Luna’s maize and carrots into the bowl in front of her, Beatrix finally took a bite of her own grass. Chewing casually, Luna went over everything she heard. “I never thought she would do something like that. I didn’t think she could, and…my sister, I think she knew.”
Beatrix giggled. “Your sister is the big one in this town. Everypony hates her. Nopony trusts her.” She took an especially big bite of grass.
“And what of you Beatrix. Do you hate my sister? Do you trust her? What is your problem with my sister?”
A gentle tap on the tin roof sounded like rain to Luna as Beatrix chewed and swallowed her mouthful. “Me? I think,” Her eyes wandered the room in thought. “…I think every one of you are fools. You have your high points, you have your low points. You make mistakes, you Princesses are ponies just like everyone else. BUT, that means you are expected to learn from your mistakes as well. You make poor choices again and again. And some of you don’t learn. And if you are in a position of authority and can’t stop making mistakes, you should step aside for someone better suited for the office. But you don’t learn, and no-one seems ready to step aside. Not when I left for this town, and not today. I don’t want to live in a nation run by fools, so here I am.”
Two incidents came to her mind when Beatrix called her a fool, she would not dispute the claim on either. But she needed to know more. “So, what did Cadance do to make you call her a fool. Did you think that before you meet that mare you told me about or…”
“It’s your sister more than anything Luna. May I call you Luna?” She nodded. “Tell me, how long was it from the time you declared yourself to be the only rightful Princess until you were banished? I am of course talking about the whole Nightmare Moon thing.”
“It was…I’m not sure. My sense of time is thrown off whenever I think about it. The whole experience could have been a dream I had during a nap before sunrise, it could have been a thousand years I was awake for. But Twilight Sparkle told me it was about five minutes.”
“Exactly Princess. You were bitter and jealous of your sister getting all that attention for rotating the planet. While you moved the entire moon one kilometer a second, every second of the month. Not to mention how you decorate the night sky with the stars, not just above Equestria but all over the world. You do ten times as much work, and that’s being generous to Celestia, you split royal duties evenly, and she is loved, adored, and worshiped. You are feared, shunned, even hated and vilified. You deserve more praise than her, and she soaks it up like a sponge. Add to that-“
“Watch your tongue Commoner! That is your Princess you speak ill about in front of another!” Her snap brought a smirk to Beatrix’s face before Luna sat down.
“Did this occur when you took the Throne Luna? Or did this happen over a period of years? Perhaps centuries even?”
Luna stared at her dinner, half eaten despite Beatrix doing most of the talking. Few ponies had seen her face look as pained as when she said, “Four hundred eighty-six years, to the day that my sister and I were crowned was when I became Nightmare Moon. It was on her birthday too.”
“So, you kept your mouth shut and went along with it. You wanted to be loved no different than your sister, but that would not happen as things were going. So you threw a temper tantrum. Immature? Without a doubt. Uncalled for? Yes. But in context, understandable. And, in a private discussion between two sister, you were justified to lose your temper after bearing such a burden I believe. Then what happened?”
Luna exclaimed, “My sister tried to use the Elements of Harmony to exorcise the bitterness from my heart. She told me that herself the day I returned. I would have done the same thing had the situations been reversed!”
Beatrix chuckled. “Then you have just proven to be a fool yourself. The Elements are to be used together, by that I mean the people being the Elements must work together. One by itself won’t do much good, if it does anything at all. Princess Luna, your sister wielded three Elements, and tried to use all of them herself. That’s not the way it works. So then what happened?”
She sighed. “There was a burst of magic, and I was banished to the moon. That was not her intent, as she told me.”
“It back fired Princess." Beatrix was growing impassioned. "The Elements are some of the most powerful magical artifacts in the known world. That is why they must be used properly, every time. You do not eyeball your target, you wait for the magic to do what you know it must do. They can be used as weapons of mass destruction! She is not some cowpony shooting from the hip!
“But she did Luna. She was a fool who thought she could use the Elements a way they were never meant to be. And YOU paid for her mistake. Not only with your banishment, but also with ponies thinking you deserved a thousand year banishment, because Princess Celestia would never do something so unjust. Would she? Like she would never ignore a sister who was ignored and feared for hundreds of years before she snapped.” Luna kept here eyes on the floor.
“Your banishment was the worst thing ever to happen to Equestria. Your sister is the only Princess ponies have known for a thousand years. Her legend is immortal, invincible, every word she speaks is law, her every thought Good. She is above our understanding. The ponies of Equestria would be lost without her, she is their mother and they are adults who never weaned off Mothers Milk. Can you imagine what would happen if Celestia stepped down from the Throne? Ponies would beg her return, ponies would find someone to blame, maybe you, the mysterious alicorn from frightening bedtime stories who threatened to shroud the world in eternal night. You would be hated by many despite how little involvement you had in your sisters resignation, and few would ever believe you. Generations later ponies would tell tales of the beautiful, wonderful Princess Celestia who was cast down from her rightful seat by her evil sister. No matter what you do Luna, you are not Celestia. They will accept no-one in her place. They would be lost without her. They praise her no different than their ancestors did, just because they did. The people of Equestria can’t survive with their Princess. And it’s not you, or Cadance, or Twilight Sparkle. They honor Celestia, even if it’s through you.””
Luna finished her dinner in silence.
Beatrix pushed her plate away and drained her water glass. “That was a thousand years ago, and Celestia would have become wiser since then. But what happened at the Changeling invasion? She told Twilight to get to the Elements. Why? The Changelings were hungry and were trying to eat. What was out of Harmony? The Elements only restore Harmony and would do nothing to the ‘Lings, beings trying to eat like all beings and animals do. Princess Celestia tried using the Elements improperly again. Why would she do that if she learned from her past mistake Princess Luna?”
“Beatrix, my sister…She was desperate for a quick end that would harm as few ponies as possible. And she was injured, she wasn’t thinking clearly.” Princess Luna poured herself more water.
“Are you aware that the Changelings had been trying to gain asylum to Equestria for three hundred years before Catnerlot? But Celestia wouldn’t even receive letters from them? Do you have any clue what they did for Celestia to deny them diplomatic ties?” The Princess shook her head. “Nothing. The Changelings did absolutely nothing to wrong Equestria or Celestia. And yet she treated them like garbage for centuries. There are millions of ‘Lings in across the world, and only a few thousand tired struck Canterlot in an invasion that made no sense at all. Luna, they were starving, and she had the audacity to call Equestria and herself victims. Your sister is a liar and manipulator. Ohhh, there’s another story you may not be aware of either. Do you want to hear it?”
Princess Luna stared at her.
“So Celestia sends a letter to Twilight Sparkle, telling her not to worry about Nightmare Moon. Saying she needs to go to Ponyville and make some friends. She did as she was told, you showed up, Twilight and her friends found the Elements and exorcised you, and Celestia set things into motion for it. Your sister manipulated Twilight into making friends and freeing you, but she could have told Twilight what to do as well. No, Twilight was not to know what she was doing, and could have made any number of mistakes along the way, while doing what Celestia should have done so long ago. Princess, your sister has proven herself to be a manipulative, sly, underhanded master of deception. She can’t be trusted. I can’t imagine why anyone does.”
Biting her lip, Luna asked, “Beatrix, you have given the matter a great deal of thought and consideration. I ask, what grievances do you have against Twilight Sparkle, or me?”
Pushing the table aside to sit on the floor, Beatrix gave a soft smile. “I used to admire Twilight Sparkle. I first meet her when I was a traveling magician, trying to be like Presto.” She pointed to the poster on her wall. “I lied about defeating an Ursa Major, so some idiot local boys went into the woods and found an Ursa, leading it to town for me to defeat. I could have given them a speech about not looking for trouble, but it was huge, and I woke up a minute ago. I tried my usual bag of parlor tricks, nothing worked, no surprise there. Then Twilight Sparkle ran up, lulled it to sleep and drifted it away to its cave. Turns out, the beast we saw in town was an Ursa Minor, and it was cranky, not rampaging.
“I tried to save some face and hightailed it out of town. After that I gave up on my magic career for a while and found work on a rock farm. There I meet Maud Pie, one of the most caring ponies you’ll ever meet. She's still a boatload of fun though. Her sister was in Ponyville when I was, she’s the one who told me about Celestia’s manipulation of Twilight. We became fast friends, if that seems likely. One morning I was going through a newspaper and saw an advertisement for The Alicorn Amulet, an uber powerful artifact that is supposed to boost the magical capabilities of ponies was on display at a nearby shop. I said how I wanted it and bragged about everything I could do with it, then Maud and I had to get working.
“That evening she presented the very amulet I saw that morning. She wanted to see my magic improve and grow, I think she also had a thing for me. So I practiced and practiced every moment I could. Soon, I grew confident enough to match Twilight Sparkle, so I took some time off to go to Ponyville and show her my new skills. Impress her, as she impressed me. Neither Maud nor I knew the corrupting influence it would have on me. By the time I got to town I wanted to One Up Twilight Sparkle, not just show her my improvement.
“You can take the story from there. Needless to say, she saved me from the amulet, but I noticed how she showed off her magic for the Saddle Arabian visitors. She was doing what she chastised me for doing just because Celestia wanted it. I learned more about her fear of failing Celestia from a Crystal Pony here in Murky’s Dream. Twilight Sparkle isn’t so much a Princess of her own domain as much as Celestia’s Yes Mare. Princess Luna, how do you feel knowing Celestia gave a pony wings and a crown because she follows orders well enough? She was supposed to be her student, not a puppet. Twilight Sparkle is a nothing more than thug with a title and magic. From what I hear, Cadance is even worse about asking ‘How high’ when Celstia says ‘jump’.”
Processing everything about Beatrix’s tale, Luna asked her final question. “And what of me Beatrix Lulamoon? What have I ever done to be called a fool?”
She emptied her water glass. “Nothing at all Princess. You have done nothing, and that means you are a fool. You have not contradicted a word I said. You know everything I’ve mentioned is accurate. You see it for yourself, and more in Canterlot and the Crystal Empire and Ponyville. You know what’s wrong, and when do you step in and prevent something from occurring? You just let it happen. You are either compliant in foolishness and incompetence, or a fool to not see it for what it is. You are at once the least and greatest among them. That’s my problem with you Princess Luna.”
Beatrix’s voice was going hoarse, she had not spoken so much in a while, and it was tiring. Pouring herself more water, Luna remained on the floor while Beatrix went to her outhouse. Scant minutes later, “Have I answered your questions Princess Luna?”
“Everything I asked, yes. Although,” she sighed. “I do not have to be anywhere tonight. Would you mind if I were to stay nearby and speak to you in the morning?”
“About what?”
“I haven’t decided yet.”
“Don’t go into town and you’ll be fine.”
“Thank you Beatrix. I will find a cloud nearby and rest for a bit.” With that, she ducked her head and stepped out the door.
** ** **
The thick cloud cover that morning was enough to keep temperatures low, and Beatrix had to hold in a shiver as she padded her way on the path to her shack back from the town well. Forgoing her magic this morning, she was thinking about making another trip when a voice boomed behind her. “A good morning to you Beatrix Lulamoon.”
Nearly stumbling, the azure unicorn regained her balance and tilted her head. “Princess Luna. I see you’re still around," ignoring the small splashes at her hooves.
“Yes, indeed. I must ask, do you want help?” Leaping off her cloud, she levitated it over to Beatrix.
“No, thank you Princess. I’m almost done. Shouldn’t you be getting back to Canterlot or Avlee or somewhere,” she asked as her shack came into view.
“I have no pressing engagements today. But I do have an answer for you.” She tossed the cloud up in the air and opened the door for Beatrix.
“An answer?”
“You asked me last night why I let Celestia do what she does if I know it’s going to be a disaster. I know why.”
“I don’t think I did ask that, Princess. But perhaps I should have. Thank you for the door.” She set her full water buckets in their place by her stove.
“Well I can tell you why: Shame.” Beatrix cocked an eye, turned around and sat on her haunches as Luna bowed her head. “Jealousy drove me to be consumed by bitterness, leading to Nightmare Moon. Shame and guilt at my actions lead me to create the Tantabus, and it was only upon seeing that guilt as its fuel that I was able to stop it. I had ponies who trusted me, and that allowed me to destroy it. But I still bear the guilt of everything I’ve done. It’s a look in every pony’s eye: they see me, they know what I’ve done, and I can never forget it. And when my sister does something I don’t agree with, I keep my mouth shut. I think, ‘What do I know? Everyone’s seen what I’ve done before, so why should I bother?’”
“Princess, if you need to say something, say it. You have a perspective no-one else does. Not just as an individual, but as a prodigal. You did wrong, and now here you are, back doing right. The difference is Celestia and Cadance don’t see the damage they cause, or if they do they don’t care. You are invaluable, and do yourself a great discredit by selling yourself short like that. And you do your sister a disservice for keeping quiet. You need to be more assertive. Pony up!”
Luna sighed. “Even if she tells me to shut up and sit quietly in the corner?”
“She won’t tell you to shut up if she listens to what you say. And if she won’t, make her listen. Tell her where she has gone wrong. If Celestia doesn’t learn from her mistakes, then you learn from them.” Beatrix padded Luna on the shoulder.
The Princess’s gaze jumped from her host back to the floor. “I could…Beatrix, are you content here?”
Taken aback by the change of conversation, “Um. I guess.”
“No, that doesn’t work. You were a traveling magician. Then you worked on a rock farm. Then you came here and became sheriff. Can you see yourself still in this town five years from now? Are you happy doing this now? Will you be then? If not, why not?”
Stumbling over her answer, Beatrix hesitated. “Ub, uh, I suppose I would have found something else in the meantime. I was a fruit salesmare before I became the Great and Powerful Trixie, so I have worn several different hats in my time. And I AM happy here now. But no, I will not always be.”
A grin spread across Luna’s face. “Tell me Beatrix, what does make you happy. Really happy. Excitement? Adventure? Meeting new ponies and learning new things? Intrigue? Challenges?”
“Uh, Princess Luna? Where are you going with this?”
She continued to smirk. “You are sheriff of a town of dissidents to the crown. You are also living on contested land, land the Forest States could cede to Equestria any day. Your behavior encouraged two colts to bring an Ursa to town where you lost your wagon. Then you returned to that town with a grudge and had to be rescued by the mare you called your enemy. Even now, when confronted by a Princess, you don’t fear me. You don’t seem upset by your challenges and changes. You strike me as a rather joyful pony Beatrix.”
Avoiding eye contact, she shrugged. “I…have never been called joyful like that Princess. And I’m not always joyful.”
“Joy is not synonymous with happiness. It’s a state of mind; you know life is hard, but you appreciate what you do have more. You can see opportunity in the tragedy…Forgive me Beatrix. My sister is the orator, not I.” Her hooves twisted in nervous excitement.
“Joyful? Do you really mean that Princess? You think so?”
“Yes I do. I also think you make sure the ponies you watch over here are able to protect themselves.” She thought of the poster she saw when she first arrived. “You don’t leave them out in the cold. Tell me, are you here to look after the ponies in Murky’s Dream, or the town itself?”
Looking at an empty corner of the shack gave her no answers. “You can’t really have a town without ponies. I wouldn’t say I’ve made friends or they are dependent on me, but I am here for the ponies.”
Luna gave her a knowing smile. “As I suspected you did. Beatrix, you remind me of the mare I wanted to be when I was a child. You are honest, loyal, joyful, and brave. You are already a great mare Beatrix, and so young. You have had your stumbles, yet you keep on trekking. If you were to stay here, the foals would look up to you, you would have a deputy or three before you knew it. But I think you would be better suited for another office.
“Beatrix Lulamoon, I want you to come to Canterlot with me. You could be my apprentice, as Celestia had Twilight. You could also serve as my councilor when the need arises.”
Beatrix tilted her head and stared as Luna went on. “You will sit next to me at Princess Councils, I will teach you Dreamwalking so you might join me in expelling nightmares, you will even speak with my voice when I send you elsewhere. It will be a life of service, not just to me, but in part to millions of ponies, but you seem don’t strike me as one to balk at servitude.”
Beatrix’s eyes shifted to the floor and around her cabin before settling on Luna. “Princess, I- couldn’t accept that. My place is here…”
“You are a Wanderer Beatrix. Perhaps you should settle in a place where your talents are fully appreciated and put to use. I have confidence in you. And you could help me clean up the Crown. Celestia does have her talents, as do I, Twilight Sparkle, and you. Working together, we can root out foolish ideas and practices that hurt more than help. Will you join me Beatrix?”
“…I couldn’t just pack up and leave. I have to speak to Combustible, the house came with the title Sheriff, I have a training class to teach this afternoon. I need time Princess.”
Luna straightened herself before speaking. “You will call me Princess Luna from now on. I expect to see in in Centerlot Castle one week from today. I shall let the guards know to let you through and guide you to my office chambers. I usually sleep during day hours but I shall meet with you at any time, and we can discuss details of your apprenticeship from there. Will you join me?”
“I will join you Princess Luna without any more hesitation! I want to thank you for this opportunity, I never expected it, and I won’t let you down.”
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90% of the story is undeserved ripping on every princess but Luna, by a character who has little idea about what she's talking about, while bending what actually happened in the series beyond recognition to try to support it, and the story expects us to agree with it?
Downvoted, I'm sorry to say.
6917315 Thank you for an honest review.
I see it as a ripping that should have happened and no-one else gave, and or even sees. What rips bothered you the most? I admit I added a few noncanon details that shown new light on them, but I do want to make this better if you want to help.
6917315 Lol. Undeserved. You might as well have not read the story, because you clearly didn't understand a single word.
6917422
Well, first, there was the stuff completely made up:
1: Luna moving the stars (when the show has shown that the stars just stay there like in real life, and she only moves the moon).
2: Celestia rotating the planet (when not only does she move the sun and not the planet, but her rotating the planet would remove the need for Luna to move ths moon in tbe first place).
3: Cadance apparently being written as a psychopath, with the same going for Celestia since she knows of what Cadance is doing.
4: Celestia supposedly rejecting Changelings for hundreds of years, just to invent a reason for her to look bad.
Then, there's the things that Trixie has no idea what she's talking about, or making criticisms that make no sense:
5: Trixie blaming Celestia for getting more praise than Luna did, when that's the fault of the citizens, not Celestia, and claiming that Celestia purposefully ignored Luna for hundreds of years (yeah right).
6: Trixie calling Nightmare Moon a "temper tantrum" amd that she was having a "private discussion" with Celestia, when Nightmare Moon was actually trying to murder her sister, take over the nation, and deprive Equestria of the sun forever.
7: Trixie claiming that Celestia's use of the elements was unjust; what was she supposed to do, let herself be murdered and risk subjecting her citizens to eons of tyranny? That's ridiculous.
8: Trixie claiming that the Changelings only wanted to eat, when it's extremely obvious that Queen Chrysalis wanted power for its own sake, not that she wanted to feed her poor, starving subjects. As obvious as it already was that Chrysalis was evil and power-mad in her debut, the recent finale explicitly confirmed it.
9: If Twilight had known what Celestia wanted her to do for Nightmare Moon, she would have failed, because she had no understanding of friendship, and would have started up interviews for the elements or something. You can't force friendship, and that's exactly what Twilight would have tried to do.
10: There is a huge difference between what Twilight was doing for Saddle Arabia, and what Trixie was doing in Boast Busters. Twilight was using her powers to harmlessly entertain other ponies (horses?), while Trixie was self-aggrandizing herself, lying about her abilities, and humiliating her audience under the guise. Twilight did nothing wrong there.
11: Celestia didn't "give" Twilight her wings; Twilight transformed herself into an alicorn using Starswirl's completed spell to realize her destiny. Twilight was destined for alicornship, as shown by the Tree of Harmony, and she earned her princess status by demonstrating exemplary leadership, strength of character, and service to the country.
12: Twilight hasn't been a yes-man (yes-woman? Yes-pony?) to Celestia since The Crystal Empire, when she learned how to go against Celestia's commands if necessity called for it. Twilight often goes along with what Celestia says even now, but that's because they're friends, and Twilight trusts her as both her senior in age and in princess-ship. There's no evidence that Cadance is such a pony any more than Twilight is, either.
Then, Trixie completely ignores all of their good traits, actions, and sacrifices they made for the good of others, like how Celestia dearly loves her sister, had to put up with personally banishing her for a thousand years, and in that time frame, shouldered both Luna's and her own duties while still leading Equestria, a beacon of harmony and happiness (barring the odd invasion), how Twilight led the force that saved Equestria multiple times, formed a network of close friends, and brought several actual sociopaths the light of friendship, or how Cadance saved the country from being sucked dry by power-hungry bugs and led the crystal ponies out of their oppression under Sombra into happiness.
Finally, I noticed Trixie completely neglected to mention Luna almost dooming Equestria when she created the Tantabus. I mean, she kept talking about things she has no way of knowing the details of with so much confidence, she should know about that too, especially since all of Ponyville witnessed it, right?
They're not perfect (Celestia screws up her plans sometimes, like with Tirek, Twilight is high-strung and a bit neurotic, and Cadance seems kind of useless against threats to Equestria when her domain of love isn't suited for the job), but all four princesses are wonderful bastions of good moral fiber and competence, and are ponies almost any pony could use as role models.
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I understood that the story invented so many crimes and foolish mistakes out of whole cloth for the three princesses that they're not even the same characters anymore, and that it used a half dozen other misconstrued or biased tellings of events to make additional invalid criticisms.
It'd be no different if I made a story where Luna regularly killed and ate foals, then had someone call her out on it. The Luna in my story isn't even close to the actual Luna, nullifying the criticisms of the show character entirely.
6917579 1: I haven't seen that the stars are stationary. I might have missed something, but that's something I made similar to our world.
2: Would it make more sense to rotate the planet on it's axis or spin the sun around the world in a 93 million mile radius every day? Yeah, surely that makes more sense. The moon still goes through it's phases, and our world turns but the moon still rotates around our world.
3: My brother/sister scene was shamelessly ripped off from Twilight's flashback of Cadance's spreading love. We knew nothing about the ponies she cast her spell on, and who knows what she did to them. If she's doing you would think Celestia knows about it.
4: I find it hard to believe the Changelings had nothing better to do then invade Equestria in a plan that made no sense. A large scale invasion to feed on love smells like desperation. I gave them a reason to pick a bone with Celestia.
5: If Celestia wasn't ignoring Luna then why did she offer Luna her friendship upon her return? That tells me she was nothing like a friend. And if they were living and working together, there were countless opportunities to be friendly, so why does she offer unless she didn't give Luna any?
6: Luna snapped. She was as much a Princess as Celestia and no-one cared about her. She took her frustration out on Celestia, who she was jealous of. Maybe if Celestia stepped aside and let Luna rule alone she would have let her be. Also, we've seen an Equestria without sunlight for years. Vegetation is growing, ponies aren't freezing to death, it looks like a stable government, they even have tourist coming to the castle. Life without sunlight seems fine, if different.
7: Her use of the Elements was stupid. They are powered by Friendship(or whatever), and shouldn't be used by a single person. Celestia might as well have killed her sister and ruled for eons.
8: A queen is not supposed to find food for her people? Did you notice how thing the Changelings are? They're skin and bone. And, if her people were spurred by Celestia for centuries, she and the Changelings would have a judge and prejudice against all ponies. That doesn't make it right, but it's a motivation.
9: I did read somewhere the L. Faust said Celestia knew(without defining even to herself how) she had to send Twilight to Ponyville to stop nightmare Moon. You can't force friendship on someone, but Twilight had no interest in it(but she's in school, she does have studies, which do come before friends in school), and friendships is a basic social skill Celestia, Cadance, Mom, Dad and Brother should have taught her long before adulthood. And she did to various degrees depending on which Season you're in. Back on track, Celestia should have told Twilight 'make some friends, and dealing with Nightmare will be that much easier.'
10: That's a fair point. I can still see Trixie being bitter about it when it happens.
11: Twilight only got wings when Celestia cast that spell on her. And that whole episode was a clusterbuck with a few good songs(True, True Friend only had good lyrics when Applejack sang a different verse to the same tune, the way a song should be instead of the chorus five times in a row). Starswirl's spell switched the Elements, that's it. And since when are spells cast verbally? It's always been lighting of a horn. What does the tree of harmony have to do with it? And Cadance's baby is already an alicorn in the leaked footage, how does that fit in?
12: Twilight has worshiped Celestia since seeing her raise the sun as a Blank Flank. Cadance is a unrepentant, shameless Mary Sue. It's easy to imagine them as Yes-Men.
This is my real reply below. I hope I have explained myself well enough. Thank you for your input again.
The Tantabus: I actually wrote this after noticing something: Luna's creation of the Tantabus was beyond stupid. And if the subject of her guilt ever came up in a discussion with friends, they would tell her not to be hard on herself. That they forgive her(Celestia was up again in seconds 1000 years ago, and no-one was hurt from Nightmare's return, so where's all this misery she caused?) and she should forgive herself. She never did until the episode, telling me she never spoke about it.
Celestia offered her friendship, implying they would spend time getting to know each other better and having adventures and whatnot. Four months later(Nightmare Night), she was still talking with Canterlocks. I suppose it was not to be used between Princesses since she didn't use it when she returned. Why did Celestia not tell her "We don't shout at the public anymore?" Did they spend any time together? And that was the first time Twilight had seen Luna since her return. Celestia told her 'make some friends', but I suppose Luna was not to be included? Twilight had five good friends, did she not have time to befriend a Man out of Time, a pony who knew no-one except her jailer from all those years ago, someone socially awkward who needed a friendly face herself? How can Twilight possibly be a Princess of Friendship when she ignores the pony who needs a friend the most? A pony who lives with her teacher, who she writes to often? Did she never ask 'How's your sister doing?' THIS is the pony who bore the Element of Friendship? I had no clue how to include all this from Trixie's point of view, so I left out the main point I was trying to make: Celestia and Twilight are a pair of crappy pretend friends to Luna.
Tirek: That is actually something I think worked out exactly as planned, by Discord, with help from Celestia. The items the Mane Six got opened the chest and Twilight would not have figured even that out if Discord had not bookmarked them in their shared diary. Discord planned on Tirek trying to recruit and betray him, and knew Twilight could fight him to a standstill with all four alicorns' magic combined. He played Tirek and Twilight like violins.
Personally I'm intrigued by this story in the concept as a whole. While I do agree with Fwelin that ripping seems to be undeserved in the concept of character portrayal it's done perfect. Let me explain. We only see Trixie perspective of the whole issue and while she tries to be open minded she actually only receive info mostly from one source. Namely the ponies that have been wronged.
It's clear she never once had brought this matter before with either of the 3 other princess. So a perspective of the opposite is never added. That leaves only guess work to fill the gabs and of course that reveals a rather negative image on the whole thing. I would love to see sequels from this story and see how this all will play out. But only if positive and negative things are balanced out. In other words don't make the stories good v.s. evil but add lots of gray in it. If you catch my drift. Make it so that each of the princesses in their own minds can justify their own actions, yes sure ignorance is a major key here but if the author plays his cards right there could be more going then meets the eye.
If the author can make such an entire plot then consider me sold.
But as a single story so far? Hmmm I still give it a votes up. Because even from a single standpoint the arguments do hold water.
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1: Whenever we actually see someone raise the sun/moon (Twilight in Twilight's Kingdom, Discord in Return of Harmony, Celestia/Luna in Princess Twilight Sparkle), the stars are always completely stationary. That means that Luna doesn't raise or lower them with the moon (nor does Celestia with the Sun).
2: When moving the sun is easy enough for a half dozen unicorns can do it (even if it permanently drains their power), I'd say that moving the sun is a lot easier than rotating the earth. It's also been specifically stated that Celestia raises the sun whenever it gets talked about it, and when Twilight had control of her magic, she was raising the sun and moon in a pattern that would be pretty ridiculous to imagine it being due to rotating the planet.
3: We don't know anything about them, but Cadance is a smart and good enough pony to know not to make ponies fall in love with each other willy nilly. I thought it was fairly obvious that she was merely helping two ponies in a relationship forget their argument for a while, given that she's not in jail or punished for doing what she does.
4: Why does it make no sense? They're predators to ponies, so taking over their nation so that they have an unlimited source of love whenever and wherever they want sounds like a great idea (if they can pull it off). Not once does Chrysalis ever talk about hunger when it comes to love; every time she mentions her goals, she talks about power. We don't even know if Changelings even need love to live; it's entirely possible that they can eat normal things, and eating love just makes them stronger.
5: Celestia offered friendship because Nightmare Moon just got finished trying to take over the nation (again!), and Luna could have been worried that she'd get punishment instead of acceptance. Celestia offering friendship was a sign that she had forgiven Luna completely, and makes no implication that they weren't friends before she turned into Nightmare Moon. Heck, Celestia was crying when she banished her sister; that's not something she'd have been doing if she wasn't close to her.
6: It was never said that no-one was paying attention to her personally; it was said that she got jealous because ponies were sleeping during her night, instead of being awake and productive during Celestia's day. None of that is Celestia's fault, since ponies are biologically designed to sleep during the night. Celestia abdicating just because her sister couldn't let her feelings of jealousy go is a horrible idea for many reasons (even ignoring that a ruler that tries to overthrow the current ruler just because they want to feel glorified isn't fit to be a ruler). First, Nightmare Moon is, mentally, different from Luna; for all Celestia knew, Nightmare Moon was going to abuse every pony until they spend hours exalting her night, and she banished Celestia, a completely innocent pony, into the moon just to get her out of the way. The only part of Nightmare Moon's rule we saw was her castle, which of course she's going to keep in good condition. Keep in mind that under her rule, the Everfree Forest had expanded greatly to cover Ponyville, which doesn't bode well for how much she actually cares about the rest of the country.
7: Somepony who was officially connected to have of them using them as a last resort to stop a tyrant is a lot better than the alternative. Celestia didn't have a choice.
8: Nothing whatsoever in either episode remotely implied that her people were hungry, or even that they need love to live. Her changelings were skinny because they're designed on bugs, not because they're starving; look at the perfectly happy Changeling in Slice of Life, who is just as skinny as all the rest.
9: Twilight had already been given a chance at real friendship many times before, but she spurned it every time (such as her Canterlot "friends", who she seemed to basically only barely put up with, if the picture of her reading and ignoring everything is anything to go by. It was clear by then that the only way Twilight was going to get true friends is if circumstances forced it; Celestia suggesting that she should get friends would have almost certainly been ignored by Twilight in her quest against Nightmare Moon (though it probably wouldn't have hurt her quest, either).
11: Celestia didn't cast any spells at all. Her horn wasn't glowing, she didn't say any incantations, and I believe the writers have said this as well. All she did was send Twilight the book and greet Twilight in the other realm to mentally prepare her for the next step in her life. Theincomplete version of the spell changed the elements of harmony, but Twilight cast it again after she completed it with her revelation after True True Friends. The completed version of the spell used the Elements of Harmony to transform her. What did the spell do when it was incomplete? It altered the true selves of her friends in a negative way. The completed version of the spell would thus alter the true self of someone in a positive way, and voila; Twilight became an alicorn after casting the completed spell. As shown by Twilight's cutie mark being on the Tree of Harmony in the central position, it's clear that, in terms of the Tree of Harmony, she was destined for something great. Spells can be cast verbally just as much as with the horn, as the series shows. Both the complete and incomplete version of Starswirl's spell were cast that way, and so was Inspiration Manifestation (which didn't light Rarity's horn up either). Cadance transformed herself into an alicorn, as well, with no assistance from Celestia. As for Cadance's daughter, what does that matter? We've known for a long time that alicorns can either be born (like is implied for Celestia and Luna), or they can ascend (like Twilight and Cadance). Cadance's daughter just means that alicorns can be born if at least one of their parents is an alicorn, and ascended alicorns count.
12: Twilight idolized Celestia ridiculously, and could easily be called a yes-man before The Crystal Empire, but she grew out of it as a part of her character development in that episode. Cadance has never been shown interacting with Celestia in such a way, and thus to claim it of her has no evidence behind it.
Old speak (like Luna was doing in Luna Eclipsed) is only used by monarchs like her when speaking to those who are their social lessers. They wouldn't have been using it in their conversations between the two of them, only when Luna speaks to normal ponies. Look at after Luna was cleaned of NMM; she spoke completely normally to Celestia, because she wasn't one of her subjects.
Whose to say that Twilight didn't ask about Luna? There are many friendship reports that are sent off screen that we never see, and Twilight does lots of things offscreen as well. For example, it's stated that Twilight met with her brother several during season 1 and 2 without us ever seeing it. Plus, Twilight was still learning about friendship in season one; she wasn't ready to become the Princess of Friendship until much later. Luna seems to have been very weak and fragile in her appearance in season one; perhaps she didn't feel ready to go outside of the castle and make friends with ponies other than her sister.
There is absolutely zero chance that Discord had planned the Tirek incident out, for many reasons. First, it was stated that the keys only manifest when said pony teaches a major lesson to somepony else; if Discord had planned it, it wouldn't have been an actual lesson, and the key wouldn't have appeared. Second, Discord isn't that in-control of his own emotions, as shown by Keep Calm and Fluter On, and Make New Friends but Keep Discord. It's easy to see that Discord was feeling completely genuine sadness, regret, and betrayal when he betrays the mane six and then gets betrayed in turn. He's a clever guy, but he has very little in terms of wisdom. Third, why would he or Celestia risk the kingdom to try to get the box open earlier? It's not like this was the last chance for Twilight to get her key, and Discord could have easily captured Tirek when they first met. Twilight getting the castle and map could have waited a couple months. There's also the fact that the Tree of Harmony's magic is the biggest counter in the series to Discord's magic; if he couldn't just open the box himself, how would he know what's inside it, and that it could defeat Tirek?
Nah, not really feeling it. Parts of it are strong like the potential nightmare fuel from Cadance's love spell since the scene we get of that she doesn't actually do any background check, she just uses it on what looks like a couple. Other parts aren't so strong, not to mention that it's implausible that Trixie would hear about some of these things, even in a link of Pinkie > Maud > Trixie. There's still other incidents in canon that could have been used to make a much stronger case, like say Celestia giving Twilight a crown presumably less than a year after Twilight cast a mind-control spell that ended up affecting most of a town, or the case of Cadance and Shining Armor becoming rulers of the Crystal Empire...because somehow.
I have my problems with this but overall it was a good use of my time to read
also
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Was gonna post the same thing until I read your comment, I couldn't have said it better myself.
What?! BUT THE PRINCESSES ARE THE LAW!
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Wow, this is an amazing story! Somehow without any of us noticing, you managed to secretly replace the Great and Powerful Trixie with a duck!
[youtube=https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hLpgxry542M]
-Mass Effect 2, the marine sergeant dressing down the recruit on the Citadel
Oh my goddess why does every Trixie one shot say all the things I want to say!? *Spams the like button*
I love coming back to reread this exposure of the princesses. There are so few but I love the ones I read. Especially when they target the mane six or Sunbutt.
I've also read the comments seeing a lot of twilights' in the chat.