Dead Silence

by CristalGalaxy

Dead.

The only thing Pinkie remembered was screaming. She didn't remember whose it was though. Probably hers.

Yeah. It surely was her screaming.

It's obvious that when you're getting executed you scream right? Unless others scream for you in sorrow.

No pony screamed for me while crying that's for sure.

Pinkie kicked a pebble with her hoof.

What is wrong with these ponies? Ya kill one of your best friends and then, boom! You're dead. Executed by order of one of the princesses. Sheesh theses rulers don't know how to manage a country.

Pinkie looked around her.
Still no movement in the fog.

She was beginning to think that there wouldn't ever be any movement in this place. It had already been at least two hours.

Fog, a flat area of dead grass and a few occasional pony skulls was all there was to look at. And it went on forever.

Also there was the silence. A horrible, sickening silence that was making the pink baker's head go crazy.

And then, a sound.
It was faint but it was still a sound. Wings.
The noise of flapping wings.

It grew closer. And closer. And closer until she could make out a pony with huge wings coming down from the sky and clearing out a little bit of the grey fog.

The pony landed a few hooves away from Pinkie.
It folded his wings away and looked up at her with grey, expressionless eyes.

Everything about the pony was grey from his hooves to wings. It didn't even have a mane or tail.

Pinkemina Diane Pie was now staring directly at no other than Death himself.

It opened his mouth and spoke in a hollow voice :

"Miss. Pie? Death on the 14th of July ?"

"Uh... Yeah I guess."

"You are dead."

Pinkie snickered.

"I know that thanks you just told me."

"Do you know why you are dead Miss. Pie?" he continued, ignoring her mockeries.

"I don't know. I guess it has something to do with Dashie?"

"You killed her. Are you aware of the meaning of that word?"

"Listen I don't wanna talk about it."

"Are you aware of the meaning of 'killing some pony' Miss. Pie?" he repeated.

"Yeah now I do cuz others killed me."

"You deserved it."

"Well you certainly are very nice!" mumbled Pinkie with all the sarcasm she was capable of.

"And like you don't seem to have any regrets, I'm sure I can leave you here for eternity."

"Excuse me who are you exactly?"

"I am Death."

At that, Pinkie lost a little bit of her confidence.

"D... Death...?"

"Yes. Keeper of the doors of hell and heaven and ruler of the dead. I decide what your faith will be. I decide what will happen to you for eternity. And you, Miss. Pie, will stay here for the rest of your death... which will never end of course."

"What?!"

"You heard me. I do not need to repeat myself."

"You're kidding! I'm not staying here for ever!" said Pinkie, half laughing half scared.

"You really wish to leave to heaven after all that you have done?"

"Yes!"

Death sighted and his giant wings started to flap, clearing the thick fog around them.

Pinkie smiled to herself. I've got this!

Then she noticed something blue.
It was like some of the fog was turning blue a bit. And there was red. And purple. And... was that green, yellow and orange?

The coloured fog regrouped in one place and started to form something. A pony.
And a few seconds later, Rainbow Dash had appeared.

A shiver ran down Pinkie's spine.
What was her victim going to say, or worse to do to her?

Rainbow had her wings spread open and her head was high. Her magenta eyes showed nothing else but disgust, anger and power.

"Um... H... Hi Dashie!" exclaimed Pinkie Pie with a forced smile.

"Shut up" muttered Dash. "How can you still call me that after what you did to me?"

"Well, I'm still your friend!"

"In what way are you a friend to me?"

"I sewed you back together!"

"After cutting me to pieces and baking me into cupcakes" murmured the cyan mare.

"Yeah... But..."

"I just can't believe you!" suddenly screeched Rainbow, "Do you know how much pain you caused me?! And all our friends? You injured me both physically and mentally.
Because of you, I can't have fun. Because of you, I don't even know what's going to happen to Scootaloo! Because of you, I lost my coltfriend... And I'm going to make you regret that forever" Rainbow stamped on the ground with her hooves.

Those last few words were shouted and Pinkie could see tears in the eyes of one who had once been her friend.

"I... I'm so sorry Dashie..." murmured the pink mare.

"That isn't enough." said Rainbow, her voice calm again.

She turned to Death who had been silently watching with his expressionless grey eyes.

"Leave her here. Don't make her feel hunger or thirst. Don't even let her feel sleepy. I don't want her to be able to do anything here."

"You have spoken" said Death, bowing as he flapped his wings, lifting himself up in the air and blowing away Dash who disappeared.

"Wait!" screamed Pinkie, "Wait!"

But he didn't listen and soon, he was gone, the fog coming back.

Pinkie stood there for a while. She sat down and looked around her.

Nothing. There was nothing to do.
No pony would be her friend here. Only the silence would be her friend.
The Dead silence.

Author's Note:

In case you're wondering who Rainbow's coltfriend is, It's Soarin of course.

Comments

[Mocha Star]

Not bad.
+1

[SpiritOfDancingFlames]

Huh. I've seen a lot of Cupcakes follow-up fics, but I've never seen one quite like this before! ^-^ I love this ^-^
I give this a Muffin Rating of: Ten out of ten muffins!
~SoDF

[CristalGalaxy]

6923635 You're the best!

[SpiritOfDancingFlames]

6927732
No, you're the best! ^-^ and your stories prove it!

[CristalGalaxy]

6928120 Thank you!! *smiles so much her cheeks start aching*

[SpiritOfDancingFlames]

6928677
No, thank you for your wonderful works! ^-^

[Tide Hunter]

This is certainly a very good fic, but the only problem is that there are a few places which seem to have a spelling or grammar mistake, or it could just have better wording (unless it is actually meant to reflect her thoughts). I will point to a few.

It surely was her screaming.

There was no err in grammar or spelling, but could have better wording like "It was definitely her screaming." or "It had to be her screaming."

Sheesh theses rulers don't know how to manage a country.

I know this is Pinkie's thoughts, but would "Sheesh, these rulers..." be slightly better?

"Miss. Pie? Death on the 14th of July ?"

"Miss Pie? Death on the 14th of July?" Not much wrong, just an extra, unnecessary space and the period which you put at the end of miss throughout the whole story. Don't put a period at the end of the word miss unless it ends the sentence. The period goes at the end of Ms., Mrs., Mr., and a few other I can't remember, none of which is used in this fic.

"Do you know why you are dead Miss. Pie?"

"Do you know why you are dead, Miss Pie?"

"Listen I don't..."

"Listen, I don't..."

"which will never end of course."

"which will never end, of course." Okay, so there are a lot of places which should have commas. I'll try to avoid showing the rest unless it has another problem there.

"I just can't believe you!" suddenly screeched Rainbow, "Do you know how much pain you caused me?! And all our friends? You injured me both physically and mentally.
Because of you, I can't have fun. Because of you, I don't even know what's going to happen to Scootaloo! Because of you, I lost my coltfriend... And I'm going to make you regret that forever"

Either do this:
"I just can't believe you!" suddenly screeched Rainbow, "Do you know how much pain you caused me?! And to all of our friends? You injured me both physically and mentally. Because of you, I can't have fun. Because of you, I don't even know what's going to happen to Scootaloo! Because of you, I lost my coltfriend... And I'm going to make you regret that forever"
or this:
"I just can't believe you!" suddenly screeched Rainbow, "Do you know how much pain you caused me?! And to all of our friends? You injured me both physically and mentally.
"Because of you, I can't have fun. Because of you, I don't even know what's going to happen to Scootaloo! Because of you, I lost my coltfriend... And I'm going to make you regret that forever"

In case you're wondering who Rainbow's coltfriend is, It's Soarin of course.

For this, the only problem is the capitalization of the word "it's".

All in all, this is a very good fic, it just has a number of spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors. I will favorite it.

[Aegis Shield]

Keep practicing your writing. Try some original concepts that don't rely on the fame or success of stories that came before yours. You can do it.