Despite my mixed feelings on the topic, there was really no avoiding a baby shower. After all, it was tradition. I had to abide by that and play the happy gracious host, even if I was grumpy, sore, bloated, and really didn’t want a bunch of other ponies around. However, I had to give in and let them do a baby shower of some sort, if only to avoid the prospect of Pinkie throwing a huge one for me. As it was, we had to wait until she was away on a map mission to hold a lower-key compromise party.
Don’t get me wrong, normally I love Pinkie parties. It’s just that quiet, restrained, low-energy parties with as few ponies as possible is pretty much the exact opposite of Pinkie’s partying instincts. I’m sure she would’ve made the effort if she knew it was what I wanted, but Pinkie’s just not Pinkie if she can’t be crazy and energetic.
In any case, we had a nice small, quiet friends-and-family gathering for the occasion. Star even managed to get some leave time to come down for the party. I thought about inviting Dad too, but it would be a lot harder for him to get time off, and baby showers have always kind of been a mares-only event. Seemed like one of those silly pointless rules about what mares and stallions are supposed to like, but I’m not the one who decided those kinds of things.
Despite me saying it was a small gathering, we had a pretty full house: Blossom, Eepy, Derpy and her kids, my cousins, Twilight, and Rainbow. I probably shouldn’t complain about the number of guests, considering all of them had brought presents. Rainbow being Rainbow, she was busy making sure her gift was the biggest and most prominently displayed, using the suspiciously book-shaped present Twilight had brought as an improvised pedestal for her own gift.
Other guests hadn’t brought me any proper gifts, but were doing their best to express their affection in more immediate ways. Namely, the slightly larger than she’d once been but still quite adorable Dinky, who remained firmly attached to my side hugging me with a contradictory mix of unrestrained glee and almost reverent caution for my preggo-belly. Fluttershy, who’d uncomplainingly shifted aside to make room for the little hug-monster, beamed down at both of us. No doubt she was judging this as proof of my maternal potential.
Rainbow flopped down next to me, grinning. “Hey Cloud, hey Dinks.” She grinned and ruffled Dinky’s mane, then gave me a quick hug. “Don’t worry Dinky, not stealing your territory. Cloud’s so huge, there’s room for two ponies to hug her.”
“Gee, thanks Rainbow.” I halfheartedly slugged her shoulder. “Can’t even hug me without making a crack about how huge I am.”
“You’re the one who never stops complaining about how fat and bloated you are,” Rainbow pointed out. “Considering we’re at your party, it’d be pretty rude for me to argue with you.” Her teasing grin faded away as she gave me a quick once-over. “So, you still hanging in there? Can’t be too much longer before the kid comes out.”
“Docs says it’ll just be a couple weeks.” I groaned and flopped against the couch. “So glad I’m almost done with this.” I grimaced and amended that. “So not looking forward to the end.”
Rainbow winced. “Yeah ... good luck with that. Maybe it’s not as bad as everypony says?”
Derpy looked up from her plate of muffins, grinning at us. “No, it’s not.” A mischievous glint entered her eye. “It’s worse. Much worse. Somepony who hasn’t gone through it can’t even begin to understand how painful it is.” She let that sink in for a bit, then smiled warmly at her daughter and rubbed her back. “But it’ll all be worth it in the end.”
Blossom smiled encouragingly. “I’m sure you’ll be fine, Cloud. You survived four years of Guard training, you can handle this. And I’ll be right there with you every step of the way.”
“Thanks.” I glanced Twilight’s way. “Did you have any luck finding any of those spells I asked you about?”
Twilight sighed and shook her head. “Not exactly. I did find one spell that would’ve taken all the pain away, but that one would permanently destroy your ability to feel pain, so it’s probably not a good idea.” She shot a sheepish grin my way. “Sorry, but it’s really hard to block out pain. Star Swirl the Bearded theorized that it’s actually a natural defense ponies evolved against illusion magic. It’s why he says the best way to snap somepony out of an illusion is to ‘smite them rightly ‘cross the cheek.’”
I briefly toyed with asking which set cheeks he suggested smiting, but the news was a bit too much of a downer to put me in a joking mood. “Figures.” Another idea popped into my head. “I don’t suppose there’s any way to—I dunno, transfer it? I mean, it is Blossom’s fault I’m in this mess.”
“Cloud!” Blossom yelped, glowering at me. “For the record, I’m pretty sure you had a role in this too.” She scowled for a bit longer, but it slowly faded to a thoughtful frown. “Though actually ... if you could split it, I guess that wouldn’t be so bad. Well, okay, it would be pretty bad, but I’d be willing to go through it if it’d help Cloud.” She paused, tapping her chin thoughtfully. “Actually, if you split the pain up into enough parts it would probably go down to something you’d barely even notice.”
Twilight shook her head again. “Sorry, not an option. Even if a spell like that does exist, it’s probably restricted. There are far too many ways it could be abused in the wrong hooves.” She smiled reassuringly. “Don’t worry, they’ve got plenty of conventional medicine at the hospital. I’m sure they’ll take good care of you.”
Fluttershy smiled hopefully. “Treesie sent some special incense to help too.”
Twilight frowned. “I really don’t see how incense is going to help Cloud with—”
I held up a hoof to forestall the potential argument. “I’m willing to try just about anything, as long as it's safe.” I normally wasn’t too big on Tree Hugger natural organic stuff, but I wasn’t going to turn down any potential pain relief.
“So long as it doesn’t make you as...” Rainbow waved her hooves in a vague motion next to her head.
“As what?” Fluttershy asked, sounding mostly innocent with just tiniest hint of warning archness in her tone.
“As loopy as Tree Hugger?” Sparkler suggested.
“I still don’t believe she’s as spacey as Sparks says,” Star chimed in. “I mean, I’ve seen a few pretty out-there ponies in Canterlot, but it sounds like she’s on a whole other level.”
“Treesie isn’t loopy,” Eepy mumbled under her breath. “She’s just very...” She trailed off, searching for the right word.
In a surprisingly effective display of diplomacy, Rainbow tried to hastily change the subject. “Does anypony want any snacks?”
I helped her out, mostly because while I privately agreed about how loopy Tree Hugger was I didn’t want to get on Eepy’s bad side. “Yeah, the little one wants some food.”
Rainbow had barely started getting up from the couch when a pink and yellow blur shot past us towards the snack table. I blinked, and when I opened my eyes again Fluttershy was hovering in front of me holding a plate that was absolutely loaded with food. “I hope I got the right things, I tried to get all your usual favorites. If you need anything else, just let me know.”
“I think that’ll be fine, Eepy.” I gave her a quick kiss on the cheek, then grinned and nudged Rainbow. “So, looks like someone’s faster than you.”
Rainbow rolled her eyes. “S’not a competition, Kicker. Besides, she caught me by surprise. If I’d been ready, there’s no way she would’ve been faster than me.”
“Of course,” Fluttershy assured her. “Sorry if I startled you. It’s just that with the foal so close, I’m getting really excited...”
“We all are,” Twilight chimed in. “It’s hard not to be when Cloud’s going to be a mom soon. I still can’t believe this is actually happening.” She chuckled softly and shook her head. “I just hope my mom doesn’t find out about this. She’s already been dropping hints about helping me find somepony, or how some of her friends have very nice sons and daughters who are right around my age. I’ve had a bit of a reprieve thanks to Cadance being pregnant, but if she finds out one of my friends is having a baby...”
I snickered and nudged her. “Guess your mom wants grandkids.” Not that I had much room to talk, with how pumped Dad was. He’d been way more excited about the whole thing than I was. Actually, just about everyone was happier about it than I was. Probably because none of them had to put up with being pregnant.
Still, might as well put on a happy face for the party.“Yeah, I’m real excited for it to be over.”
Fluttershy smiled and rubbed my shoulder. “I know it hasn’t been easy for you, but you’ve been doing a wonderful job so far.”
Rainbow nudged me and smirked. “Aside from your barf-bread experiments.”
Blossom rolled her eyes. “Be nice, Rainbow. She can’t help her cravings.”
Derpy nodded in understanding. “Cloud’s apple vinegar bread was pretty bad, but I still think my spinach, pickle, and thyme muffins were far worse.”
Twilight grimaced. “According to the last letter Shiny sent, Cadance has been putting blue cheese and chocolate sauce on almost everything she eats.”
“What, at the same time?” Sparkler thought it over for a second, then gagged. “I mean, they’re fine on their own used in the right context, but combining them and putting them on everything is just ... no.”
“Actually, blue cheese and chocolate sauce might be really good on haybacon...” A second later I realized everyone was staring at me with mingled shock, disgust, and horror. “What?”
Dinky was the first one to recover, probably because she’d gone through a couple phases of putting sugar on everything. “It’s not her fault her baby makes her want weird stuff.” She leaned down and nuzzled my belly. “But I won't blame ya either, ‘cause you can’t help it. I know I made Mommy hungry for funny stuff when I was in her tummy.”
“Yeah, I can’t blame the kid for any of this.” I winced as something happened that I might have blamed the unborn child for just a little bit. “Kid, I know you’re a Kicker, but do you think you could put a bit less effort into living up to the family name?”
“S’what you get for making the kid a Kicker,” Rainbow opined. “I’d be more surprised if it didn’t kick a lot. Speaking of ... you decide on the other half of her name yet?”
“We haven’t made a final decision,” Blossom told her. “We’ve been bouncing around ideas and narrowed the list down, but we’re still thinking it over.”
“Bunny was my favorite name,” Eepy opined, smiling and leaning against me.
Rainbow and Sparkler both snorted in near perfect unison. Star looked lost, until Sparkler leaned over and whispered something in her ear. Then she snickered and nodded.
Twilight tried to be a bit more diplomatic, putting a strained polite smile. “That’s, um, that’s certainly one option...”
Fluttershy frowned at the unexpected reactions. “What is it? I thought it was a cute name.”
Derpy cleared her throat. “Fluttershy, if the foal’s going to be part of Cloud’s clan ... well, try saying the full name out loud.”
“Bunny Kicker.” A second after that, her face fell. “Oh.” She bit her lip, then slowly shook her head. “That makes it sound like the foal would attack bunnies.”
Rainbow smirked and nodded. “Got it in one. Not that the world’s most ironically named rabbit couldn’t use a couple swift kicks to the head, but probably not the best pick for your kid’s name.”
“Angel’s not that bad,” Fluttershy murmured in her tartarus-spawned rabbit’s defense. “He’s just a little ... um...” She trailed off uncertainly.
Derpy quickly moved the conversation onward before things could get awkward. “Yeah. Anyway, I get what you were going for. Though even if there wasn’t that issue with Cloud’s family name, it’s ... well, remember the baby isn’t going to be a baby forever. Bunny’s the kind of name that might not fit as well when your child’s a full-grown adult.”
“So kinda like Dinky?” Rainbow asked, ruffling said filly’s mane. “Just saying, Dinky’s not quite as dinky as she used to be.”
Derpy rolled her eyes. “Considering you’re the one who helped come up with that name, you’ve got no room to talk, Rainbow.”
“But I like bein’ a Dinky,” the young mare in question opined. “I mean, I dunno what I’d be if I wasn’t a Dinky.” Her face screwed up in an expression of intense concentration. “But if I had a different name, would I like havin’ that name and think Dinky was silly?” Her eyes slowly began shift to opposite corners of their sockets as she pondered over this deep question. “I dungeddit. Anyway, I really liked Rainbow’s idea earlier, ‘cuz Vortex Kicker’s pretty cool.”
Rainbow beamed approvingly, snatching Dinky away for a quick hug. “See why I like this kid so much? She knows awesomeness when she hears it.”
Storm nodded slowly, breaking her near-total silence. “There is merit to that name, certainly. Though if you are at a loss, you could always name it after one of the heroes of our clan.”
Star tapped her chin thoughtfully. “Come to think of it, I don’t think there’s been a Shade or similar in the family for a while. Or you could go for something a bit more creative, like naming the kid Tenebrous Kicker or Umbra Kicker. Or how about Iskios or Skia?”
Sparkler rolled her eyes. “Star, I love you to bits, but you really need to work on some more creative names. Naming the kid after Shadow doesn’t get any less creative just because you do it in Old Unicornian or Old Pegasopolan.” She paused, then shot a half-serious glare at her girlfriend. “And if we ever get hitched and start thinking about kids, I’m just gonna nip this one in the bud. No. None of those names. Ever.”
Twilight, as one would expect from a Princess of Friendship, quickly moved things along to forestall any potential bickering between the young lovebirds. “You do have a lot of great ancestors other than Shadow to name a kid after. There’s always her children Gale and Ash. Or there’s Magnus Kicker—I did one of my research papers on the Battle of Two Magnuses”
“That had to be confusing,” Rainbow snarked. “Though I guess it was easy to say Magnus was gonna win that one.” She frowned, thinking it over a bit more seriously. “Personally, I think you you really need to go for something dynamic, bold, and in a word: awesome! Magnus kinda reminds me of Flash Magnus, so that could work.”
Sparkler opened her mouth, but didn’t actually say anything. She shot a couple looks my way, worrying at her lower lip and apparently mulling over whether she actually wanted to say anything. Star picked up on it, and nudged her. “If you’ve got an idea, Sparks, now’s the time.”
Sparkler took a deep breath then slowly trotted over and gave me a quick hug. “Um ... just my two bits, but I was thinking ... well ... ‘Nimbus Kicker’ rolls off the tongue really nice. Seems like a good way to ... y’know.” She coughed, then tried to put on a sassy grin to lighten the mood and move past the awkwardness. “Besides, if we tried to name your kid after a Kicker hero, we’d end up with Stoic Honorary Duty Pride of Clan Kicker, and nopony’s gonna be able to fit that onto a Hearthswarming card.”
Rainbow moved in on my other side, wrapping a wing around me while Dinky tightened her perpetual hug. I took a deep breath, slowly thinking it over. I liked the idea of honoring Mom and everything, but ... well, at the same time it was hard to deny that naming my kid after her seemed kinda weird. Not to mention it was a name that came with a ton of baggage for me. The last thing I wanted to do was pass some of my own mom issues to my kid, and naming it after my mother was definitely tempting fate on that front.
I got comfortable with all the different ponies who were hugging me. Finding a way for three ponies to hug you at the same time without making things crowded takes a bit of work, but thankfully there was a lot of me to hug, and I had experience with accommodating several partners for much more than just platonic hugs. “Nimbus ... it’s not a bad idea.” I ruffled Sparkler’s mane. “Thanks.”
“It is a pretty cool name,” Rainbow allowed. “Kinda feel bad about suggesting anything else, considering it’s...” She trailed off, giving me another squeeze with her wing.
“It’s fine.” I rubbed her back until she calmed down a bit. “I’m not gonna go to pieces every time I hear Mom’s name. It’s ... it’s been years since we lost her. I’m not gonna say it doesn’t still hurt sometimes, but I’m dealing. Anyway, what’s your idea, Dash?”
She grinned and shifted her wing off my back, striking a bit of a showmare-esque pose. “Well, I was thinking of something like Sonic Kicker, Vortex Kicker, Spectrum Kicker ... you know, really cool names with a bit more panache.”
“They do have impact to them,” Twilight agreed, grinning at Dash.
Fluttershy frowned, shuffling in place. “They sound a little ... aggressive.”
Sparkler smirked. “I’m just glad she stopped pushing for Rainbow Dash Jr, or some variant thereof. Awesome, Radical, or Cool Kicker would’ve been a bit on the nose too, but Rainbow’s ideas work just fine.”
Rainbow grinned and nudged me. “Hey, your kid’s going to be something special, I just know it. Might as well give them a name that reminds them of that.”
Star snickered and flopped down next to Sparkler. “We sure the kid is Blossom’s? Because Rainbow seems to be way more excited about picking out a name for it. Or is just some kind of subliminal vicarious thing...”
Blossom snorted and rolled her eyes. “I’m plenty excited, it’s just hard to build up the same level of enthusiasm when we’ve been debating about names for months. Especially since I haven’t exactly been brimming with suggestions.” She shrugged helplessly. “I guess I don’t really have the same base to work off of when it comes to name ideas.”
I pulled her in for a quick hug. “Just means you get to make a fresh start, instead of half the name ideas coming from your ancestors.” I poked her chest. “For all we know, a couple generations from now our grandkids will want to name their children after Blossomforth the Great.”
“Cloud...” Blossom sighed, but couldn’t keep a grin off her face. “I’m still adjusting to the idea of being a mom and starting a family. Let’s not start talking about what our hypothetical grandkids may or may not do.”
“Yes, dear.” I gave her a quick peck on the cheek, then settled back on the couch. I noticed Rainbow fidgeting a bit, and trying to hide the sort of eager impatience that reminded me of when she’d come up with a new trick and couldn’t wait to show it off. “Hmm, why do I feel like you’ve got one last ridiculously over-the-top name left to suggest?”
Blossom took one look at her and nodded. “Yeah, it looks like Rainbow’s got something big up her sleeve.”
Rainbow grinned at us, clearly relishing the attention and letting us stew for a bit before she revealed whatever she was planning. “Well, I do have one idea but I don’t know if I wanna share it or not. It might be so awesome that I might want to save it for myself later on. I mean, I might have kids someday, so I oughta save the best names for them.”
Twilight shot an amused smile her way. “Of course. But I’m sure you would come up with an equally awesome name if you needed to.”
“That’s true...” She grinned, buffing a hoof on her chest. “Well okay, I guess I could share it if you really want to know...”
“With how much you are building it up, it is hard not to be a little curious,” Storm confessed.
“Alright then...” She took a deep breath, and I could swear I heard her mutter, “pause for dramatic effect” under her breath. Finally, she delivered the goods. “The best name you could possibly give your kid would have to be ... Aurora Boreawesome!” She let out an excited squeak and grinned proudly at us.
“Aurora ... Boreawesome,” I repeated dully.
Fluttershy bit her lip. “It’s ... um ... it’s nice?”
“It’s the sort of name only Rainbow could come up with,” Blossom deadpanned.
Dinky stared up at Rainbow, her eyes wide and her mouth hanging open. “Whoooooaaa...” Her face lit up with a huge grin. “That’s perfect!”
Rainbow grinned and scooped Dinky up for another hug. “See? This kid has great taste!”
“Dinky is usually a good judge,” Derpy agreed diplomatically. “Though I’m not sure if that name would work with Cloud’s clan name.” She tapped her chin, frowning in thought. “Though actually Aurora Kicker sounds pretty good.”
“That definitely has potential,” Twilight agreed, seeming a bit relieved to have found a positive spin on Rainbow’s unique name.
Rainbow’s chest puffed out proudly. “See? Twilight, Derpy, and Dinky all agree! Knew it was great.” She turned to me with an expectant grin, waiting for my verdict.
“Aurora Kicker does sound pretty good,” I confessed. “But so were a lot of the other names I heard. You know how it is, this is a really big deal and I want to be sure I’m picking the right one. I’d hate to stick my kid with a name it’d hate.”
“Come ooooon,” Rainbow whined. “You know my names are great. I mean, no offense to anypony else, but nothing I heard comes close to Aurora Boreawesome!”
“We’ll definitely add it to the list of names we’re considering,” Blossom offered. Knowing her, she’d probably put it on the list right below poor Eepy’s suggestion of Bunny Kicker.
“Yeah, it’s definitely one of the standout names,” I assured her. It was technically true—nobody was going to forget a name like that anytime soon. I just wasn’t sure I wanted to inflict a name like that on any child. “‘Aurora Kicker’ sounds good too.”
Rainbow frowned, thinking it over. “I suppose we could always make Boreawesome her middle name.” Her frown slowly transformed into a grin. “Yeah, that would work. Normally middle names are totally lame and forgettable, so giving your kid the best one ever would be a great way to break the trend.”
Dinky nodded along eagerly. “Yeah-huh! I dun’ even remember what my middle name is!” She pondered over it, her eyes drifting apart as she concentrated.
“Diana,” Derpy reminded her. “Though I was briefly tempted to make it Muffin.”
“Oh yeah! I guess that’s okay, but it’s not as cool as Boreawesome! But part of why Rainbow’s so cool is that she can come up with such cool names, right?”
“That’s right!” Rainbow snagged one of the muffins off Derpy’s plate, and narrowly avoided a grisly death by quickly offering it to Dinky. Dinky wasted no time following her mother’s example and tearing into the baked good like a starving shark.
“So then, anyone else want to offer a suggestion that can compete with Nimbus Kicker or...” I took a deep breath to make sure I could say Rainbow’s suggestion with a straight face. “Aurora Boreawesome Kicker?”
“I still like Bunny,” Fluttershy murmured. “Maybe we could use the middle name to make it clear that baby won’t go around assaulting cute innocent rabbits?”
Star thought it over, frowning thoughtfully. “Well if Shade, Umbra, Tenebrous, and the rest are out, what about something like Silhouette or Pall?”
Sparkler rolled her eyes. “Or you could just go with ‘I worship Shadow because she’s the greatest pony ever of all time’ and remove all subtlety?” She teasingly poked her girlfriend. “Didn’t you read your hero’s memoirs? She hated when ponies named their kids after her.”
“Because she was so modest,” Star answered without a moment’s hesitation. “Really, she wouldn’t have been half so inspiring if she went around demanding ponies name their kids after her to honor her legacy.”
Sparkler answered that with a skeptical frown. “So ... you honor her incredible modesty by doing things she wouldn’t want you to do in order to aggrandize her reputation?”
Star shot a grumpy look her way, and I quickly leaned over to whisper in Sparkler’s ear. “Might want to drop it, unless you like the idea of getting exiled to the couch.”
Sparkler nodded, then leaned over and nuzzled Star. “Just teasing, love.”
Derpy cleared her throat and quickly got things back on topic. “I like Nimbus.”
Blossom smiled and nodded along. “I think naming the foal after Cloud’s mother sounds like a really sweet tribute.”
Storm tapped her chin thoughtfully. “And come to think of it, Nimbus Kicker was a war hero during the Lunar Rebellion as well.”
Star shot a half-serious glower her sister’s way. “Kinda taking the magic out of the moment, Skunky.”
Twilight promptly rose to guard’s defense. “What? She brought up a good point. It’s naming Cloud’s foal after her own mother, who was probably named after the war hero.” The princess cleared her throat. “Anyway, I really liked Aurora.”
Star frowned thoughtfully. “Well, I’ve got a dilemma now. On the one hoof, I could make Skunky look bad by agreeing with her princess when she didn’t. Buuut that’d mean going against what Sparkler suggested, which could cost me girlfriend points. Damn, trapped between my two greatest desires.”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “Just because Storm works for me doesn’t mean she’s not allowed to have her own opinion. And really, you should know better than to try and stir up trouble between us after what happened during your pranking spree.”
Star grimaced and nodded. “Okay, point. Having every single one of my tracking gems loudly announce its presence was not fun. Not to mention what Princess Luna had to say when she found out about some of your prank plans.”
“I was going to put the moon back once I was done,” Twilight mumbled sheepishly.
Blossom pointedly cleared her throat to get things back on track. “We’ve got some good suggestions to go through, at least.”
“They were all very nice names,” Fluttershy agreed.
“Hmph.” Rainbow pouted, clearly still a bit put out that Aurora Boreawesome hadn’t gained instant and unanimous acceptance. Admittedly, I was starting feel far more tempted by the name than any sane mare should. Or maybe it was just that I really wasn’t sure about naming the kid Nimbus, and Aurora seemed to be the next most popular suggestion.
Derpy grinned and playfully nudged Rainbow. “We all know that you’ll hug the child relentlessly no matter what Cloud names it. I swear, there were times when Rainbow got more time with Dinky than I did.”
Sparkler snickered and nodded: “Yeah, I remember how long it took for you to convince me that Rainbow wasn’t Dinky’s second mom.”
“But she is my godmom!” Dinky chirped happily, trotting over to give Rainbow a hug. “And now she’s gonna be Aurora Boreawesome’s godmom too.” She paused, her face screwing up in fillyish ponderance. “Wait ... if Rainbow’s my godmom and Aurora’s godmom ... does that mean that me an’ Aurora are sisters?”
“I suppose you are, in a manner of speaking.” Derpy ruffled her daughter’s mane, then grinned at me. “I thought I had it rough. Between Rainbow and Dinky you’ll probably never even see your foal until it’s full-grown.”
Twilight chuckled softly. “I also want a chance to hold the foal eventually.”
Sparkler snorted. “Get in line, sis.”
“It’s going to be a long one.” Blossom smirked and pulled out a notebook. “I’ve been thinking about selling tickets to decide who gets to hug the foal first. From the way everypony’s been talking, we could take care of the kid’s college fund before its first birthday. Just haven’t decided what a fair price would be. I was figuring we’d base it off how much Rainbow makes, since she’d spend all her spare cash to get extra spots in line.”
Rainbow scoffed and rolled her eyes. “I would not. Besides, being the kid’s godmother means I’m allowed to have free hugs.”
“She’s not wrong.” I grinned, perfectly willing to leave my pronouns ambiguous so I could hold the safe middle ground. “Anyway ... I think we’ve spent enough time talking about names. I’ve got lots of presents left to open.”
Twilight nodded and used her magic to quickly extract her own suspiciously book-shaped present from beneath Rainbow’s gift. “That’s right!” The rest of the gifts hovered over, neatly arranging themselves on the table in front of me, with Twilight’s gift now on top of the pile. She lifted her own present up giving it a little shake and unleashing the most adorably hopeful and eager to please smile that I just couldn’t say no to.
“Alright, let’s see what we’ve got...” I unwrapped the first of many gifts.
So, I'mma guess Bunny, and it'll be a colt. A very stalliony-colt, who after constant teasing his entire life, becomes evil and tries to take over the world[1] and has to be defeated by the mane six or something in some terribly messy drama, 'cos that's how Cloud's life goes, am I right, folks?
Right?
Right?
*crickets*
Ehehe, ah... - look there, a distracting thing!
*runs for cover*
[1]I'd say hiding his true name, but actually... Kinda wouldn't need to and oh my Lichemaster, I started this being facetious, but actually Bunny Kicker the villain is way too on the nose and makes you wonder if that subconsious talent predicition that ensures ponies have names than match their talent is a real thing and this is how accidents (and Sombras) happen...
I feel like all of Rainbow’s suggestions sounded like “Original Character, Donut Steel” names lmao
Aurora or Nimbus would be cool.
(btw, who was Nimbus Kicker in the Lunar Rebellion again? I thiiiiiiink she was the one who married a unicorn and then got killed while pregnant, but I’m not entirely sure. Oh well, time to read the WHOLE THING again )
Hey... hey wait. Chengar. Chengar what are you doing.
Got to say, Aurora Kicker has a nice ring to it. Though I think it would be hilarious if the foal turned out to be a boy and they had to think of all new names. XD Also, Dinky getting so excited about Rainbows suggestion is the most adorable thing ever!
I like Aurora, personally, and it certainly sounds like there weren't a lot of negatives to that. Naming it after the mother you had a complicated relationship with, or making it sound like they kick bunnies, or sounding 500 years old...
But, of course, it's up to Cloud to decide, really.
Given the way the foal's behaving now, "Rib Kicker" should've been joked about :-p
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It was
I'm with Twilight. "Aurora Kicker"s got a nice ring to it.
Gotta go with Aurora Boreawesome Kicker. Too good a name to pass up.
Perhaps Aurora Nimbus Kicker is the better option.
Yes, Bunny kicker is back! I'm licking Aurora for the name.
SO close to having Pinkie in this story with Dash. And Dash is actually considering the idea of kids where is Pinkie to capitalize on that!
As for name I like Aurora but I feel that Dash and Pinkie should be able to keep that name for themselves because I think Pinkie is crazy enough to use the whole thing and appreciate the pun.
COME ON PLEASE GIVE ME A SCENE WITH PINKIE AND DASH! Even just a little Easter egg. THey started this whole set of stories it would be great to see how far they have come and honestly this sort of situation with Cloudkicker having a child I could see being an important moment of them as a sort of "oh that could be us in the future, do we want that?".
A colt named Sue?
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I could totally go for Aurora Nimbus Kicker. Give the kid her own name but give her a middle name in honor of a past hero. :) Totally what I did when I had my kid.
And Fluttershy can call her Bunny as a nickname if she wants.
Ash? I take it this child of Shadow's is going to show up in the Midnight stories? This is the one that no one knew the sire of, right?
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If overthrowing Equestria does not pan out, he could, as 8790381 mentioned, make a proper mint as an Equestrian country singer with his multi-patnium hit "A Colt Named Bunny"...
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A bit later and the thought struck me... Bunny Kicker and Flurry Heart.
That's a terrifying thought...
A true supervillain team-up in the making. Bunny Kicker being the loyal minon, of course, to the Princess of Destruction...
And you just know it's all gonna be Flurry being "you have failed me once again! Take him to the dungeon to await his punishment!" where that means "her sex dungeon" where they have weird villain sex, because son of Cloud Kicker and daughter of Cadance, you KNOW they're going to be into all kinds of freaky stuff...
Dammit, I really want to see this now, with Bunny Kicker being, like, the Anti-Dinky...
Oh ye gods, I just realised I implied a Poof/Foop sort of scenario and one that could actually work...
Stop me, everyone, before I do more thinking!
Anyone think we can twist Chengar's (or maybe Ponibus)'s arm into writing a noncanon spin-off...?
Throw my support behind Aurora Kicker as well. Very nice name.
Aurora Bunny Kicker (ABK to her friends).
Nimbus is a nice idea, but Cloud is right she has a lot of baggage with that name ...
My votes on Vortex Kicker.
Was going to suggest other swirly wind patterns, but I think both Hurricane and Tornado kicker are both already taken and still alive.
Shame that neither Cloud, Flutters or Blossom have shown any interest in the Neighponese language, as Tatsumaki Kicker or Shobosha Kicker would be awesome, especially the latter if the whole "Name influences talent" plays out
I'll throw another vote in the hat for Aurora Nimbus. Middle names are apparently a not-just-Pinkie thing in the Winningverse, so it works. The kid gets named after Cloud's mom without Cloud having to be reminded of that every time she says their name. And the name-set is very pegasus, very weather-pony.
Maybe Rainbow could be brought around by mentioning that "Aurora Kicker" would reduce to the same initials that a certain awesome archaeologist's alter ego sports?
A nice quiet chapter filled with lots of RD shenanigans ^^
My personal favourite is Aurora Kicker (maybe with Nimbus as a middle name, or as a first name with Aurora as middle name). It's pretty much free of any sort of baggage, unlike what Nimbus would be.
And is it just me, or was Blossom not very present in this chapter? She spoke a little, but was silent for the vast majority of time, unlike pretty much everyone.
What about a colt named Loin?
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"Fine! Do you really want to know? We made
sweet love,had sex, rutted! Hot, sticky, steamy sex all night long! We did things that would make your hooves curl, things they do not have names for and would get you excommunicated from 3 major religions and 6 minor ones. They will have to invent new similes for this level of exuberant rutting! We made rabbits look inadequate! It was so passionate the neighbours smoked a cigarette when we were done. We ploughed each other so vigorously, so thoroughly, I am surprised we can see straight, let alone walk! IT. WAS. AWESOME!""...Really?"
"Nah. We just played Parcheesi and then we went to bed."
Nimbus is quite a nice tribute indeed, but I really like Aurora.
Not the "Boreawesome" bit, but Aurora is nice.
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Grandfoal Fruit. Fruit of Loin.
Aurora Nimbus Kicker gets my vote.
It may not be a pony name, but I would go with Richard, if only because the shorthand way of saying Richard is “Dick”, and no one is gonna be messing with a kid called Dick Kicker!
It's too bad Blossom isn't a donkey, because there'd be an unavoidable, obvious, awesome name ready to go right there.
Yay little Ass Kicker! You're gonna grow up to be so tough!
This does seem like the calm before the storm. Still, it was a fun little chapter. I suppose they'll end up going with either Aurora or Nimbus in the end, if something doesn't go really wrong. I'm just glad there's been a little time skip or else at this rate I would be old and gray when the baby is actually born. Unless Chengar Qordath is planning to throw a major curveball our way. Perhaps the baby being stillborn would be a bit too dark, but it's entirely possible it's born with some disability for the sake of drama, even if it's something minor like with Nemo from Finding Nemo having a smaller fin than usual. Or maybe I'm worrying too much and the baby will come out completely healthy. We shall see. I just can't help but feel something is still about to catch us off-guard.
According to my calculations, The Cutie Re-Mark should be coming up pretty soon, which means Starlight Glimmer is about to join the cast. I wonder how that will change things, considering Cloud is now working in Twilight's castle and Starlight will be living in Twilight's castle. Here's a really dark thought: Starlight causes Cloud to have an abortion due to kicking her in the stomach or something in order to get access to the castle and then when she's "forgiven" Cloud refuses to be anywhere near her and ends up having to leave her job and possibly even Ponyville. Okay, that probably won't happen, unless Chengar has become a complete sadist all of a sudden. Or maybe he really hates Starlight Glimmer, which considering how many people hate her, I wouldn't even be surprised by.
Anyway, I for one hope that this story won't become quite this dark. So far it's been a pretty light story, so for it to suddenly change the tone this drastically would be quite jarring. I'm looking forward to the next chapter, as always.
Bunny Kicker will live on!!
Yikes.
"Special" incense.
Vortex Kicker isn't actually that bad, even if it's a Dash suggestion. Makes me think of Tornado Kicker.
Yeah, same.
Hey, sure.
Her?
Is that a mistake by Rainbow, or did Chengar accidentally let something slip?
Because everyone else is still using neutral pronouns.
And Dinky is doing it too.
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I think it’s because, in the Winningverse, foals conceived by same-sex couples are typically the same gender as their parents. They are likely just assuming the goal will be a filly. Though it has been heavily implied that Blossome was gender swapped at the time of conception, so that may make the odds a little more shaky.
Honestly I don't like Nimbus, Cloud never really got along with her and no one else really knew her. Aurora is actually a great name, it rolls off the tongue better as well.
8805759
So there is same-sex conception in this continuity? I've assumed her partners' transformation was what led to Cloud getting pregnant in the first place.
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In the Winningverse, female pairings are able to conceive due to the Magic of Love. Male pairings can reproduce as well, but that requires the gender-bending magic that Cloud, Blossom and Fluttershy made use of. Albeit for different reasons 😏
Aurora's a good name. One of the few good things your Rainbow Dash has ever said ever. (Not the Boreawesome part).
Nimbus Aurora Kicker... or Aurora Nimbus Kicker. Best of all worlds.
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The foal is most likely to be female regardless of conception method. In the winningverse females significantly outnumber males, which means it is always a good guess that you'll get a daughter rather than a son.
Which does beg the question, how do they keep their population stable? Love magic conception seems to be somewhat rare since most of the ponies in the story have a father rather than just two mothers. And families are generally small.
I'm guessing it'll be either Aurora Kicker or Nimbus Kicker. But I think that BlossomKicker has a nice ring to it. That might leave Fluttershy feeling left out though. Or maybe Crotch Kicker if they want the males to stay off her when she gets older.
I'd say they should wait until the kid is born, some ponies are named with a nod to their appearance after all. Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie were probably named after they were born.
I'm guessing that the foal is female given how they talk about her. Sure the audience doesn't know, but Cloud ought to have found out by now, and correcting her friends on the pronouns if the foal was male.
Still no idea if it is a pegasus or not, it seems most likely since both parents are pegasii. We know there is a small chance that Cloud will give birth to a unicorn because of Star. However we know nothing about Blossom's parents, so even earth pony is possible.
My guess is a yellow coated pegaus female, I hope it will be Aurora Kicker in that case. Because I agree with Cloud, naming the child after her mother will be a bit awkward.
Though even if it was an Earth Pony colt named Ground Kicker I'd still love to read more. Predictable can be boring after all. I'm to freaking curious!
When can we expect the next chapter
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Probably within the next week or so.
You can always check my publishing schedule on my profile page.
Alright, I will admit, this chapter got me happy.
I am hoping for Aurora Kicker. It is nice, and does not carry the huge weigh that comes with Nimbus.