When Rainbow Dash finds herself strangely encountering one of Ponyville's most prominent recently deceased musicians, she and the sprit grow close. Then things get interesting...
Chapters (2)
psycho pony guy
Joined 29th Mar, 2012 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Kaidan · 30k words · 1,697 72 · 30k views
- PresentPerfect · 7.6k words · 315 24 · 8.4k views
- zombiesurvivor123 · 11k words · 36 3 · 8.1k views
- Golden Flare · 17k words · 74 7 · 2.4k views
- cesmaster644 · 25k words · 23 1 · 1.4k views
- CartsBeforeHorses · 8.6k words · 176 24 · 4.5k views
- DeiStar · 17k words · 204 6 · 4.3k views
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Stats
Page generated in 0.083 seconds
Total duration
1,107 users online
1,638,827 hits today, 1,872,792 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
When there is a spelling error in the description, you're usually off to a bad start.
Edit: Ok, read it, wasn't too bad.
However, there are a few problems that I'd like to point out.
Firstly, Ide isn't a word, it's I'd or I would.
Furthermore, you used than instead of then (that was the problem in the description).
Also, the shift from third person (with Dash) to first person (with Lyra) was pretty awkward, It is usually best to stick with the same perspective the whole way through.
I think the third person worked better for you, stick with that.
Other than that, there isn't anything else hugely wrong with it, a few grammatical and spelling errors, but It seems like an interesting prospect.
Finally, if you want an editor, I heard there's a board on ponychan which has good pre-readers, So go check that out ^^
hmmmm...sounds good.....tracking
Than things get interesting?
*Then
The writing is pretty okay. I'd recommend you go and find an editor though to help you with the kinks.
^^^^^^^^ i agree with them, especially the Brave and Mighty pepper (strange name xD)
ok, i fixed then, and ill try to stick to 3rd person if im better at that, but other than that, im excited about this project... it should be fun
622292 the advice is greatly appreceated
623135 i dont there is a "normal" name on the whole site, which is half the fun, non-normality i suppose
dat be true :O