Soarin is dreading the arrival of the Wonderbolts new recruit. Not only because he was not notified as to who this new pony is. He also learns they are fighting for his position! 
my first story
This is going to be a tug-a-war.
WARNING: THIS IS MY FIRST STORY, IT'S PRETTY BAD ...
i'd like it if you'd leave some comment making fun of it down below 
TRIGGER WARNING: Soarin and Rainbow dash shipping. i don't really ship it anymore, that's why i cancelled it( that and the terrible writing! but just to be on the safe side.
Chapters (3)
awesome story so far!!!!!
Seriously?
Awesome so far
5817738
it is greatly appreaciated.
Thx so much for the suppportive comments
5817433
It's not perfect ... But if you have any ideas how i could improve it, then please enlighten me 
Sorry if you didn't like my story.
5816894
thank you very much, I hope to improve the next chapter though to make it more discriptive.
5819057
I didn't even read it. I was pointing out an incredibly obvious (to most people) error in the story description itself, and you still haven't fixed it.
You don't even see the issue, do you? It's not supposed to be spelled "Wonderblots".
5819484
Its fixed!
Sorry! i didnt notice. thanks for pointing it out.
Ooh! I am interested!
My reaction-
*ahem*……WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTT
5860139
Lol, somepony has some explain ing to do...
5860649 and boy do they
The cringes tho!
5861575
IKR
LOL Surprise was there instead of Dash ha ha ha
The story was too painful to actually read... but by Celestia's mane... that story concept!
This could be a brilliant story, so lets start with what you need to fix.
A) You're word choice and word flow needs to change drastically.
For example you have
Try Something along the lines of
'Soarin trotted along the pavement of the Wonderbolts training fields, relishing in the small clip-clops his hooves made against the ground. It was an experience he rarely enjoyed. The sound of his hooves made when as they hit something other then clouds, the feeling of pavement and dirt against his frogs, all simple pleasures he normally couldn't enjoy living in Cloudsdale.'
First, I was able to say everything you were with less words. This is always good. Second, it doesn't start out awkwardly, giving you a place and setting to imagine immediately. When starting with sound effects, that's all the reader can hear, despite not knowing where those sound effects came from or why they are important.
Some other things, make sure you capitalization are done correctly. Its one thing to mess up on comma's, its another thing to not have the proper words capitalized. In your author notes, capitalize the first words of each statement and put a period at the end. Also, make sure that everyone's name is properly capitalized.
Remember, its Silver Lining, Fire Streak. They aren't one word, and they look awkward and unpleasant when they are.
Next.... always, always, always remember to go through and re-edit your work. I'm horrid because I give my second draft to my editor rather then my fourth, but you should NEVER post up a 1st draft. You have words like safety and blushed misspelled that could have been caught if you had just done a second edit.
Also ... this line
... that doesn't hurt your eyes to read?
You have a great idea here, but its worthless if you can't even make it readable. I'd love to see you take this story down, re-edit it, turn into something that looks good and post it back up.
5873135
Thank you so much for your feedback!
I will do my best to fix this, I am still learning about such in school. This helps me out so much, thank you.
OMFG!
Nice so far, even if you could use an editor, but I've seen worse!
thanks, i know its bad
. so im going to cancel it and work on another story.
this one was more to test the waters. i wish to take on new techniques and get an editor. but i appreciate you're comment
. i will do my best to improve. but i am still learning.
6205565
5908535
ik the editing is so bad it makes me laugh too!
SILVER LINING YOUR TOO OLD AND HAVE A WIFE!!!
continue plz