Still no cl0p.

*sits in corner and crosses arms*

I can wait.

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Poor stupid thugs, if they had any inkling of what humanity was they would stay the buck away from us if we are in a fighting mood.

This got featured too. I guess I'll need to read this as well.

Warning: May contain up to 5% David Eddings by volume.

So The Belgariad minus The Malloreon, The Redemption of Althalus, and The Elder Gods?

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It got featured way back when I first published it, so it pops into the feature box every time I upload a new chapter now.

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Actually, The Elenium and The Tamuli, mostly. (Sparhawk is best Eddings hero! )

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Wow

Well I mean, he is an adult, so he could have pretty easily gotten a black belt as a teenager, I think it only takes like 4 or 5 years to get your first level black belt, so it's not a stretch to say he could handle himself in a street fight.

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The length of time it takes to reach that level generally depends on the style and the person's learning curve. So yes Darren likely has a black belt and can defend himself very well for the most part.

I love the way Lyra stepped in there at the end. It seem like something she might do.

Faran makes me happy.

I can't for the life of me remember who saved him. It wasn't Raindrops, as she is a Pegasus. Who do we know that is minty and had orange magic?

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Ironically enough, the answer's right below your comment.

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Ah, but can you be sure that they were changelings?

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I won't reveal whether you were right or not until the appropriate chapter.

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I seem to recall you having two stories that are plenty edgy with zero clop content. All good things in time i suppose.

Speaking of bars in Austin. I once went to the Copper Tank(?) where they brewed their own beer.

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Apparently, the Copper Tank closed in 2005. Sad really, but I never went there, so I guess I'm partially to blame.

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It's perhaps the most tired of tired old jokes.

Guess I need to come up with something new and original for the obligatory 'first' comment...

Also, my stories are edgy? Well, shit. I might as well roll out the red and black alicorn OCs then...

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Red and black alicorn OC, only if you've taken leave of your ever loving cotton pickin mind.

But seriously 'Slipstream' is my favorite story only because your first story hasn't been updated since the first half of forever.

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It was a long time ago. I had heard it closed, that was sad. They made a rather fine stout beer (Guinness?). Kinda reminds me of Dark Horse Breweries (up north) stout.

(Sparhawk is best Eddings hero!)

I'm not disagreeing, but I had a lot of fun with Althalus... even if Gher was some kind of Mini-Stu. Elenium and Tamuli do feel like they age better than the others.

Did you repeat the 'red herring' reference for emphasis, or could he just not come up with a different simile while drunk? Either way, that was interesting. The reference you went out on got a laugh from me. Speaking of which, he could probably use a prairie oyster about now.

Good ole Xeno!Lyra... even if several Leroverse authors have used her for their Worf... that's on them, not her.

The horn weakness thing has always kinda bugged me. It's lazy, sorta like the Saiyan tail thing that DBZ quickly got rid of (for the same reason, it's a lame, lazy way to give a character a weakness), or Kryponite if you want another example. Though I suppose that makes it a time-honored tradition. At least it wasn't "Be not!". ...Not Eddings' best moment, that one.

Other than that though, I felt like the fight went okay. I mean, you're always gonna kinda wonder when an average Joe takes down professional criminals. But protagonists tend to be on the lucky side, outside of tragic tales, so it's fine. And he did get lucky. If his opponent had just, say, thrown him fifty feet in an arc in a random direction... eh, maybe someone woulda caught him, maybe not. Bad time, indeed. He's also lucky these guys were weak. His fist knocked the dude out? We've seen ponies take much harder hits and shrug em off.

Between the prostitute and that club they passed... I'm guessing pony taboos are less about what you see, and more what gets hinted at? It's like the difference between a woman wearing a bikini to the beach, and the same woman wearing lingerie. Same amount of skin exposed, different connotation. That said, Derren has a ways to go. If he's pondering a hip check (and by the by, human women aren't shy about that one, come on man ), I can see why that prostitute freaked him out. I'm pretty sure he's nowhere near ready for whatever's in that club. Ironic that he's called out the relative primitive nature of pony technology; by their social standards, he's stuck in the Victorian era.

Weak, puny-human!

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Sadly, the only Eddings works I ever read were The Belgariad/The Malloreon and The Elenium/The Tamuli. Then again, it wasn't just Sparhawk that made the latter two series awesome. (Hence, why I "borrowed" Faran, gave him a sex-change operation and a sapient brain, and threw him/her into Equestria. )

could he just not come up with a different simile while drunk?

It's probably a mixture of that and me being a derpy author who doesn't always fully re-read what he's already written.

The horn weakness thing has always kinda bugged me. It's lazy, sorta like the Saiyan tail thing that DBZ quickly got rid of (for the same reason, it's a lame, lazy way to give a character a weakness), or Kryponite if you want another example.

True, but in a way, it's also part of show canon.
vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/mlp/images/4/4e/Sweetie_hits_Rarity%27s_horn_S2E23.png/revision/latest?cb=20140919191623

His fist knocked the dude out? We've seen ponies take much harder hits and shrug em off.

He was also trying to target a pressure point/weak spot, despite knowing little about pony anatomy. He got lucky, indeed.

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Yeah... same way that tail thing and the kryponite thing are canon to their respective fictions. It wasn't a knock at this fic, more a general comment on that use. Though, while Rarity might not overcome such a weakness (since she doesn't rely on magic in combat, or even focus on combat... despite being oddly adept), violent criminals might.

The Redemption of Althalus is just one book (though a rather large one). Worth your time if you want some good ole throwback Eddings. Conversely, I hated Regina's Song, and the Elder Gods series was very meh imo. It was so laughably predictable that even the characters were commenting on it. It was like Eddings was memeing himself.

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I hated Regina's Song,

FWIW, TV Tropes seems to think that The Losers is a "Randite propaganda piece," so I guess I didn't miss much by giving it a pass.

It was so laughably predictable that even the characters were commenting on it. It was like Eddings was memeing himself.

Then again, you also had characters in The Malloreon commenting all over the place about how many things in that series seemed to be repeating events in The Belgariad. Eddings was memeing himself before memeing was even a thing!

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Huh, I actually forgot about The Losers. Never read it; perhaps it's just as well. As to the Mallorean, you're right, no matter what he said about following the authors before him, he was a trendsetter. ... And knowing that, I still say what I do about Elder Gods... actually the Dreamers is the series name, Elder Gods is Book 1; I mixed them up. Anyway, it was Mallorean up to 11... and a half. Check the Deus ex Machina entry on his page that you linked... tvtropes knows what I'm saying

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Lyra has bright yellow magic. That was why I was confused.

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After some consideration, I changed the description of Lyra's magic to be more easily recognizable.

While it looked run-down and disreputable on the outside,The Whickered Stallionwas anything but on the inside.

That's how you know it's a good tavern.

only to succumb to a girlish giggle as I plucked it from her telekinetic field

That poor mare will be heartbroken to know he's already a taken man.

with mom’s spaghetti regurgitated

Before departing the stage, I placed the microphone back on its stand

Should have done a mic drop.

Suddenly, hands looked a lot less advantageous in the light of unicorn telekinesis.

Until he learns the secrets of unicorn horns from Lyra.

me swear off of donuts forever.

Sounds like he a bitch.

“Are you saying that she’s interested in me? Like, in a manner that might be considered unprofessional? Even though we’re twoverydifferent species?”

Like I said, all they need to do is fuck and get past this weirdness.

“For science, of course.”

Always for science.

My curiosity would have to be sated later. We moved on, as the alley we were looking for was on the far end of the pony-style titty bar.

Maybe he can convince Faran and Raindrops to be his personal titty dancers.

It was at that moment that I learned just how sensitive unicorn horns can be when channeling magic.

Or he could learn that way and not the fun way.

A mint colored blur soon emerged from behind Silverclaw. “Are you okay?” a somewhat familiar, angelic feminine voice inquired.

What is she doing here? I thought she’d decided to stay behind in Ponyville?

Mares always have to protect their stallion.

With what was no doubt a goofy grin on my face, I made a gun with my right hand, pointed it into the air, and pretended to shoot, eking out a gravelly “Bang” before surrendering to oblivion.

*Breathes in deeply*

BOI!

Looking at the comments, no-one seems to have pointed out the MASSIVE reference to the first Saints Row.

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Thank You! Someone other than my pre-readers recognized the reference at long last!

Please man, I just need more chapters ;(

And now the waiting begins

As of the writing of this comment, I have just finished reading all the current chapters to this story. And I must say, what I have read so far is fantastic! Even all the cringe-worthy foot in mouth moments for Meester Knox. I love how this story reads. It feels good and I found myself laughing a lot and wondering how things would turn out.

Another reason why I just HAD to read this, despite my trepidation to do so due to it being on hiatus, was because you mentioned inspirational draw from my favorite author of all time. David Eddings! I personally have read all of his books centered around the Belgarion universe. So delicious. I wish they made that a movie instead of Lord of the Rings. T~T

And so I wonder. Is there any sort of timeline on when this story might continue? You left me on quite the cliffhanger. And I am left feeling miffed.

Best wishes,
Lotus Blossom

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Sadly, I haven't touched this fic in almost a year, and there's a bit of a story behind that. There was originally a ninth chapter to this story - a dream sequence. Sadly, it didn't pan out like I'd hoped, culminating in a bit of a public meltdown on my part. I still plan on continuing the story at some point, though, as I think I may have come up with a way to rework the dream sequence in a manner that will get more positive attention. However, there's another fic that I've been writing off and on over the last couple of years that I'd like to get out the door first.

And as far as Eddings is concerned, well... The Belgariad (along with The Malloreon) was my gateway drug, but The Elenium and The Tamuli are my perennial favorites (as could probably be inferred from my use of a R63 version of Sparhawk's foul-tempered warhorse as a potential love interest for Derren. )

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That's good to hear. I hope it's soon though! I want to read more of your delicious writing. And maybe, one day when you're all done. I'll reward you by logging your tale into my bookshelf of stories I consider masterpieces.

And the Elenium and Tamuli are gateways huh? I'll have to check those out. My 10 book marathon that is Belgarion is my annual read. I wish I had the chance to send Eddings a letter of thanks before he passed. I missed the boat by a few months.

Once again, best wishes!
- Lotus Blossom

this. story. IS. DEAD!

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I really hope it’s not, this is a really good story

Good old street brawl. Nice to see our boy getting some figthing action

Is this history dead??

Love this!