Avatar: The Last Alicorn. Book 4: Alicorn

by Jeweled Pen

Avatar shorty 2: Nightmare to Nightmare

Sweetie took a slow, deep breath as she nudged her food around her plate. The small, white unicorn occasionally glancing up at her elder sister, Rarity. Neither of them were wearing anything for their breakfast, but then again that was normal. Before long, Rarity would begin to attend to her duties as current ruler of the Water Nation and Sweetie would be left to do as she wished throughout the castle. Not that there was anything she wanted to particularly do.

Occasionally she'd go into the city and walk through the streets, or talk to the ponies there. Sometimes she'd join the soldiers in their training exercises. But more and more often she was finding herself shunned by the other ponies of the kingdom. Not angrily, of course. No, whenever she went anywhere, most ponies would quickly find a reason why they needed to be somewhere, anywhere else. Many still remembered who she had once been, a cold, merciless mare who could kill or destroy a pony at the slightest provocation.

It didn't matter to most that that wasn't who she was anymore. They'd keep their whispers and gossip to themselves, hiding it as best they could. But she knew how they felt. She could feel their eyes linger on her whenever she walked anywhere, feel the tension in the air increase dramatically whenever she entered a room. The baited breaths, the trembling hooves. The parents quickly trying to hide their children.

Meals with her sister were the one place where everypony didn't freak out around her. Namely because the two were the only ponies there. They occasionally had... guests, of course. But that often made it worse. She shuddered as she thought of the time Blueblood had joined them for a meal. Watching him nervously eying her. He'd never admit it, but she knew he was scared of her. Possibly even terrified. But then, who could blame him? If not for her, he'd never have lost his horn. During the war, and even after the war, he seemed willing to forgive her, but that fear still lingered.

“Sweetie? Darling?” Rarity asked. “Is something wrong? You've hardly touched your salad.”

Sweetie blinked and looked up. “Huh? Oh, it's nothing. I'm just... thinking,” she muttered softly. A slow, treacherous thought flowed into her mind. “I... think I might go see mother today. Would you like to join me?”

The current ruler cringed. “I'll... consider it.”

That was a no. Sweetie knew it, Rarity knew it, their mother probably knew it. Her sister was still frightened of their mother, not that she could blame her. So many years they'd lived under her abuse. Even if now she was free of that corruption, it could still be felt, the scars it left going far deeper than flesh and bone. But she knew the three of them had to face it eventually, they couldn't hide forever.

“Is Blueblood's visit going to be extended, again?”

Rarity's cheeks turned a soft, rosey red. “I... am not quite sure. He's... been discussing a number of different matters with me. Trading, rehabilitation, economic repairs.”

Sweetie smiled. “He's here so often, it's almost as if he's living here now.”

Her sister's cheeks turned bright red. “I-I have no idea what you could mean. He's the representative from the Fire Tribes, it's only natural that he'd be here for extended periods.”

“Mmmmm hmmmmm,” Sweetie said with a little smile. “Funny, the Earth Kingdom and Air Nomad representatives are usually only here for a few days, but I swear it's almost like he's here for weeks at a time.” The bright red cheeks made her grin and she went in for the kill. “I heard there was a disturbance the other night as well. Somepony apparently had gotten through the guards and was... serenading under your window? I couldn't imagine who would be doing that.”

“No idea!” Rarity said with great wide eyes. “None at all! Nope! None! Probably just rumors. Why, I should really get to work. There were not, nor are there, any ponies serenading under my window.” She stood up and started to trot off, only stopping when she felt a tug on her tail.

“Rarity? Big sis?” Sweetie said softly, her voice turning serious.

“Yes, dear?”

“Don't push yourself too hard. Trust me, there are always going to be ponies who hate and despise who you are and what you do, no matter who you fraternize with. Don't let that stop you. Don't burn yourself out trying to please everypony.”

Rarity gave a little smile before she started trotting away. “I have no idea what you could mean, but I will take those words under advisement.”

Sweetie sighed and looked down at her soup as the door closed behind her. Everything felt... different now. Her sister didn't seem to notice, but everything had changed. There hadn't been any assassination attempts past the first few weeks of the reign. Ponies everywhere just seemed... happier. Not all ponies, of course. Her mother had done a great job of putting the wickedest, cruelest ponies possible in charge of the military. But they'd managed to clean it out without much issue.

She was able to take quite a bit of credit for that. When she was controlling the military, she'd already done a little cleaning beforehoof. With her sister's aid and with quick movements, cleaning it almost completely had been almost simple. It had helped that the military itself was almost shattered and the mere idea of a civil war was impossible. After all, their current ruler was now seen as a hero, one of the ponies who had helped defeat the destructive Discord. What kind of foal would dare try to oppose her? The Shadowbolts had been there as well, ready to aid them at the slightest provocation, before the majority joined Harmony.

But now, everything just seemed good. Almost too good. She kept waiting for the attacks, assassination attempts, the disgruntled ponies, but none of them came. The hundred year war was over, night and day were back in cycle. Their country had almost been destroyed, but now it was rebuilding itself. It was a time of healing, of nurturing, of becoming friends once again with the three other nations. There were a few dissenters, of course. But none of them could get any traction. Too many ponies were tired of the constant fighting. They missed the sun, the light, the warmth. Discord's tyranny was still on their minds as well, a reminder of how bad things could be.

It was a strong, healthy peace and she couldn't stand it. Ponies were happy and it glimmered like a beacon of how horrible and awful she and her mother had been. She knew it wasn't fair to blame herself. After all, Discord had been almost all powerful, nopony could have expected them to fight off his corruption.

It didn't make the things they'd done right, though. It didn't make them innocent of all the death and destruction they'd caused. Because at the end of the day, she knew it was her fault. It may not have been completely the pony she was, but that was what she had been capable of. All it took was her desire to have her sister and then she turned into a monster. There was really only one pony she knew who could understand the pain she'd felt.

She got to her hooves and trotted out of the dining hall, leaving her food behind. She wasn't feeling hungry anymore, just mopey. She walked through the halls, glancing towards the ponies who looked to her, only for them to quickly look away or find excuses to leave. It didn't take her long to find her mother's 'prison'. The same one that had once housed their father.

It was a prison in name only, now. It didn't even have any guards anymore. The door that had once stood strong had been removed. Torches lined the stairway, shining their light across the thick carpet that coated the steps. Her hooves didn't make a sound as she walked down, looking around nervously as she went. The torches seemed almost dimmer, as if some magic was pushing down on them, trying to keep the light at bay.

The room at the bottom had been completely torn apart. Now there was a large, thick bed for their mother to lay on. A desk, a bookshelf filled with literature, even some paints. The floor was carpeted as well. The room was dimly lit with a few candles.

It didn't take her long to find the mare, the once feared Nightmare Moon, now the prisoner, Luna. She looked smaller, warmer. Her coat was no longer black, instead a dark purple. Her clear mane seemed to flow around her as if it had a life of its own. She sat in the corner, her head laid down between her legs.

Sweetie sighed and pushed the door. It wasn't even locked. There was no need, their mother's own guilt kept her here. “Hello, mother,” the princess said softly as she stepped inside, closing it behind herself.

The elder mare cringed. “You... shouldn't be here,”

“Neither should you. There's no need for you to waste away down here, you're more than welcome to come and join us for breakfast.” Sweetie looked down at the pile of dirty plates in the corner. Even the staff were afraid to come down here, so they avoided it when they could. She'd seen them drawing straws once to see who had to come. “You're not Nightmare Moon anymore. We could... everypony could use seeing you.”

Luna gave a soft sigh. “It is... better that I stay here. That I avoid... them. All of them,” she muttered softly. She looked up at her daughter with sad, moist eyes. “The pain I have caused... the suffering. It cannot be forgotten.”

“No, it can't,” Sweetie said as she trotted over and sat by the mare, leaning gently against her. “But it can be forgiven. You aren't that mare anymore. I'm not who I was either. You were under his control. We both know exactly how horrible it was. What it... turned us into.”

Luna gave a soft sigh. “Yes, but I was the face of our nation, for most of my life. Like my father. I could have changed things, but instead I fell into the same monstrous pit of hatred that he did. I may have been under Discord's sway, but it was my own selfishness that led to it.”

Sweetie cringed. She couldn't really argue with those words, after all, they were the same ones she had so often used. “We were, though.” She reached out and pat her back. “That's the important distinction. We aren't, now. We can change, try to fix the destruction we caused.”

“Sweetie, don't. I am--”

“You're not too far gone!” Sweetie said, tears beginning to well up in her eyes. “Because... because if you are then, so am I,” she said weakly, leaning against her mother as her hooves reached out.

“Honey...” Luna said softly, a hoof reaching out to wrap around her.

“I just... I just don't know what I'm doing anymore,” she said weakly. “I try my hardest, but I keep getting the looks, the stares. I know they don't forgive me. I know... a lot of them still hate me. And I... I can't blame them. Half the time I hate myself.”

The elder mare rested her head on her daughter's. “You're not too far gone, child. You're still young, you have a whole life time to create your legacy.”

“But look at all the pain and misery I caused. How many ponies... lost so much to me. All the conquering. The ponies I destroyed. I tore the countries apart.”

Luna nodded. “I know. We both did. It's what we... it's what we were trained for. Practically bred for. But... it wasn't you. It was Discord's taint, his control. His wickedness that flowed through you.”

“B-but you're right. It's... not just that. I felt it. Even now I... I still feel it. Sometimes I'll get mad and I'll want to... lash out. To hurt. To dehorn somepony. To kill them. To torture them. They'll say the wrong thing and I'll just... flash out. It's like I was under his control again. I catch myself, but what if one day I don't? What if one day somepony does something and... and I hurt them? Or worse?”

Luna closed her eyes and repositioned herself so she could wrap both hooves around her child. “I know. Trust me, I know. His... taint never quite leaves. It lingers on, a deep scar in our hearts. But that's not the pony you are, child. You are a kind, sweet mare who cares about her ponies. Even when I... when I changed you, when I filled you with his essence, you were still that. A mare who cared about the ponies under her command. I saw what you were doing. Removing ponies who you didn't trust, putting an earth pony in charge. Your use of the Fire Tribes. Bringing all those ponies together and guiding them. You're not too far gone,” she whispered softly. “Your life is just beginning.”

“Mother, I just... I don't...” She looked up at the mare. “I don't think I can do this alone. I'm so scared. I want to tell Rarity, but... but she has so much to do. Aunt Celestia doesn't even... come here that much anymore. I just...”

The once ruler leaned in and kissed the mare on the forehead. “I know, my daughter. You... are right. Perhaps I... have spent too long hiding in here, away from everypony. Hoping to avoid the shame and... humiliation of my fall.” She pulled back and looked at her daughter. “I can never, ever rule again. I lost that right when I hurt and nearly destroyed the ponies under my sway. But... perhaps now I can be something I should have been long ago. A mother.”

Sweetie gave a little whimper, gazing up at the mare. “Does... does that mean...”

“I'll take your advice,” she said with a deep breath. “I... may not...be welcomed by all. But I cannot hide away forever from ponies, while my children bear the weight of my mistakes.” She then leaned in again, her head laying on the young mare's head. “It's time that I returned to you. Even if I cannot rule, perhaps I can still be a guide. For both my children.” She gave another soft, gentle kiss to the mare's forehead.

Comments

[Jeweled Pen]

6371242 Sweeeet. I actually do have a role for Nyx now. Thankies. :)
6687918 Thanks. Was one of my favorite lines. :)
6688977 Eee hee hee hee. Actually, that wasn't fully Lin's group. There are multiples, this time. Lots of things are different from this series and the original(possibly the fact the fire benders aren't gone is the biggest), so a lot of different things are changed in the make up of the city. Hopefully these will all explain them. Happy to see your over views are back. <3

[GMZ_Casper]

...Poor Luna and Sweetie Belle. I want to hug them sooo much. Here's hoping that they get a whole more forgiveness from the others.

C&Cs will be PM.

[eric-emanwu]

6691286 Touche. But, to be fair, you've committed yourself to this unique take on both materials, so that means you get to push your creativity to its limits if you so desire.

Anyways, like Twilight, Sweetie was feeling an itch for something dangerous to happen. But in her case, that itch was hiding her own feelings of guilt and sadness. That she's the princess once again, and yet even more lonely than before now that Flower and Scoots are out helping the world. Though that bit with doing house cleaning on the military? Fun. Like I said, even when Sweetie was evil, she still had evil virtues like her commitment to fair play. And now that things are over, she's working to smooth out the military might of Water to something less vicious and more managable.

And the stares. Always the stares, because you don't go from being Azula to being Sweetie without a few neigh sayers cropping up in doubting your character shift. Not to mention your future brother in law is never gonna forget that YOU were the one to take off his horn. Though, all the dawwws. Blueblood went all Romeo and Juliet to Rarity by serenading her window. How sweet.

But anyways, trying to figure out a way to deal with the itch, Sweetie descended down to visit Luna. Luna for her part was now in an open prison. One without a wall, but still held there by her own shame. Though newly refurbished, with art supplies, reading materials, space to write her memoirs.

So the two talked. And it's interesting to see the role reversals that happens here, showing both logic and love from both sides. Sweetie's strength is in her logic. Her Azulogic if you will. She knows ideas, so she points out that Luna can still get back up there, stand up, show that she's not pure malice anymore. But when Luna started pushing back with her shame, something switched in the 2 of them. And where Logic once held power, now love does. Luna does love her daughter. Knows the scars that being discorded leaves on people, particularly them for so long.

And in the end, Sweetie lost her strong face, but won her goal. Both of them know what it's like to be judged for their pasts, but now, Luna's getting the courage to step up and show that she's more than just a cold past. Sort of a...lighter version of Ozai giving Zuko ruler advise. And it's kinda funny. Even though Rarity's false paradise will never happen, it looks like through courage and love, some of those ideals are still being reassembled in new and beautiful ways. Luna will carry wisdom from her pain at being evil. Sweetie will carry gentleness from her sharpness at cruelty. Celestia carries calm after the turbulence she was carried through. Rarity will hold compassion due to having so much ripped away for a while. And in time, they'll have a new family member, and the line of Belles and the cycle of water queens shall continue just like the Avatars do.