A New Stall in the Square

by Night Music

Applejack

It was the strangest day in Ponyville today. Not because Discord had done anything, no quite the contrary in fact, Discord literally did nothing today. But that's not why today was weird. It was weird because there was a newcomer to Ponyville market square. But he wasn't a pony, he was a giant hairless ape, and he stood maybe a head taller than the princesses. So, ponies had been wary of him. But he just stood there, behind his stand that had appeared with him. And from that stand of his came the most heavenly aroma, taunting everypony to come closer. And one brave soul had done so to find out what he was selling from his stand.

"Hello?" The earthpony known as Applejack had said with a little uncertainty in her voice.

"Hey, how ya doin'?" He replied picking up a pair of metal tongs.

Applejack had looked up at the ape with questioning eyes. And the ape looked back with an emotionless face.

"So, ya going to order or what?" The ape asked. Applejack had jumped a bit startled by the question. She had looked back at the crowd of ponies that had been hiding around the corner and watching with awe as the brave pony had approached the new vendor.

"Uhm, what are ya sellin'?"

The tall ape replied with pointing a finger to the small banner that had adorned his vendor.

"Hot... Dogs? What are hotdogs? You sell puppies or somethin'?" Applejack asked with concern, she had not heard any puppies in the time she was next to the vendor. He shook his head.

"Than, what are ya selling?"

"Would you like a sample?" He asked, holding the tongs above a opening in the vendor.

"..."

"...?"

"Sure..." Applejack finally said.

He then stuck his hand into the opening and pulled out a tube made of dark brown stuff, he then stuck it between two slices of connected bread. Looking down at Applejack he then asked.

"What do you want on your dog?"

A look of horror made its way onto Applejacks face as she stared at the thing in his hands.

"That's sick! Why in Equestria would you kill and cook dogs?!" Applejack yelled.

"They're not actually dogs, ya know? just the name, ya see?."

"Then what are they?" She asked as she continued to look at the thing in his hands.

"Look, at this rate, it's gonna get cold, and cold dogs are just gross, what do you want on it? We have ketchup, mustard, onions, beans, cheese, bacon, and for the weirdos, veggie bacon." He gagged at the last one.

"Ketchup, I guess..." Applejack said.

"A classic, not my favorite, but a classic none the less." He said as he whipped a red container and squirted a stream of ketchup onto the hot dog.

"So, what's ya name?" He asked before wrapping the dog up in a small napkin.

"Applejack." She replied as she took the food in her hoof. She stared at it, wondering if it would do anything now that she had it.

"So, what's this place called?" He said as he began to make another hotdog and spread beans and onions on it, along with pieces of bacon. He then began to eat it.

"Ponyville." Applejack said before she took a small bite out of the food in her hoof. She chewed for a good minute and swallowed. A small smile spread across her face as she devoured the rest. A hearty smile appeared on the vendor's face.

"Glad ya like them, now, how about we talk payment."

"How much for the one and maybe another for the road?"

All he had replied with was four fingers. Applejack took a saddle bag and tossed him four bits. He looked down at the gold coins, picked one up, and tested to see if what fake."This can't be real gold... Oh well, the coin is real."

"So, what do you want on this one?" He said as he put the bits away.

"Surprise me." Applejack smiled. The ape shrugged lifted another dog onto the piece of bread. spreading beans, onions, mustard, and finally, ketchup. Before wrapping it and handing it to her.

"Here ya go, the whole shebang."

"Thank ya kindly." Applejack said as she took the dog in her hoof and began to eat. "So, ya never told your name..." She said with a full mouth.

"Vinnie, Vinnie Abate." He said with a small smile.

"Where are ya from Vinnie?"

"The Bronx, New York, bad neighborhood, good people." He said, the smile on his face growing by a small amount. Remember his old job in New York.

"You mean Neigh York?"

"Yeah, whateva'." He said shaking his head. "I hate puns, and now, I have to live in one." He thought as he watched the small pony eat the tube of meat.

"What did ya do there? If I might ask."

"I worked for a group of people, nothing much else to say." Applejack shrugged and continued to eat.

"So, what is actually in these things? I think I want to try and make 'em."

"Eh~, You got your common dogs that are filled with various things." He said as he looked around at the crowd of ponies that have been inching closer and closer to them.

"Like what?"

"Ya got pigs, cows, and maybe a little bit of horse." Vinnie said nonchalantly.

And at that moment, the dog that had been in her hoof, hit the ground, and so did the one she had earlier.

Comments

[DominiusTWD]

ok that was kinda funny, but im curious as to where he got horse from, hot dogs dont commonly have horse meat in em.

[The_Machinist]

Fuck yeah, hotdogs!

[LtMajorDude]

Aww man! Insta-fav!
Update please!!!

[Endlessshadow]

I think Apple Jacks soul just died that day

[OF29]

Moar please!

[Flare Rain]

Yep, definetly got the accent down-packed. I like the the story so far.

[PokemonVirus]

Poor applejack!

[PokemonVirus]

:pinkiepiesmile:

[PokemonVirus]

I mean

[Shocks]

Damn. Dropped the bomb right then and there.

[Night Music]

5671485 Shock, can't have a comedy without a little dark humor.

5671493 Hell yeah! Hot Dogs!

5671702 I'm glad you liked it!

5671784 I'm pretty sure it did...

5671912 Moar is coming soon... soon.jpeg

5671952 I'm glad you liked it, I kind of winged it, accents aren't my strong suit, but I'm glad I did okay.

5672396 Just wait, it won't be just Applejack! Mwuahahahaheha!

5672522 Couldn't resist...

Honestly, thank you all for the amazing feedback, I'm trying to thank the people who come here and read my stories more often, I have no clue why I didn't before, but really, thank you all! And if you have some criticisms for me, don't hold back! Just leave me a comment, and I will read it. Guaranteed.

[King Kenya]

Pigs and cows in a hot dog? So they're not real hot dogs then, with hooves and lips and miscellaneous off-cuttings and various other theoretical animal parts, which might at one time have possibly been in the same room as a pig? Pity.

[Raven]

I tell people I like Mayo and Ketchup on hotdogs and they look at me funny...

[Endlessshadow]

5672824
You just had to put that in the comment didn't you?

[Night Music]

5673292 I... I don't get it.

[Night Music]

5672846 No judgement here. This is a place of friendship and magi- naw! I was just kidding, you're pretty weird. I kid, I kid.

[Night Music]

5672743 Thank you, all kinds of feedback help.

[Endlessshadow]

5673335
King Kenya's comment about the miscellaneous cuts from the pig and cow added to the hot dog :P

[Raven]

5673341 Ouch man. That hurts. Right in the spleen or maybe the upper colon.

[Hard Cider]

ALL OF MY LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Asheram]

5671485 I can already hear the explanation. "Hey, I don't make the stuff, I just sell it."

[King Kenya]

5673292

What? Just because I enjoy the genuine Sausage Inna Bun Experience...

If I may quote one of the great authors:

There are platonic burgers made of beef instead of cow lips and hooves. There are fish 'n' chips where the fish is more than just a white goo lurking at the bottom of a batter casing and you can't use the chips to shave with. There are hot dog fillings which have more in common with meat than mere pinkness, whose lucky consumers don't apply mustard because that would spoil the taste. It's just that people can be trained to prefer the other sort and seek it out. It's as if Machiavelli had written a cookery book.

discworldemporium.com/image/cache/data/Printed%20Ephemera/cmot%20dibbler%20sticker-850x850.jpg

[Aurora Dimmet]

5673335

Kenya complaining about Pink Slime or whatever.

I don't care as long as it's tasty.

[Ekhidna]

Fucking.....yes.

Now bring Shining Armor and let them engage in an epic war ofHot Dogs vs Corn Dogs!

[Asheram]

5675339 Bucking hell. C.M.O.T Dibbler in Equestria, this needs to be written! God help us if he ever met the Flim Flam brothers.

[Night Music]

5676668 ... You are a genius, would you mind if I actually wrote that?

[Endlessshadow]

5675339
And that is why I prefer to eat at home

[Ekhidna]

5677045 By all means, do so!

[Night Music]

5677674 Awesome, gonna start writing, I got the whole weekend to finish the next chapter and start that one!

[Apocryphal Frost]

5672824 I've never understood this. Surely it's at least mostly pig meat, it can't be that much cheaper to use other animals.

[JEFFERY8U]

I found this relevant.

5678122

[Night Music]

5678836 And I found it hilarious! And some cool music. Vinnie's gonna get ya.

[MustacheMerlin]

5672846 dude, putting fry sauce on anything is perfectly okay and usually delicious. Anyone who tells you otherwise obviously has either never done it or isn't doing it right. (Fry sauce is what happens when you mix ketchup and mayo)

I speak my opinion and therefore it is true!

[Zanec]

So, ponies had been wary of him. But he just stood there, behind his vendor that had appeared with him. And from that vendor of his came the most heavenly aroma, taunting everypony to come closer. And one brave soul had done so to find out what he was selling from his vendor.

I believe you mean the stand, the vendor is the person behind the stand.

[WorldWalker128]

5671485
You know, I don't think I've ever eaten horse. What's it taste like? Don't say chicken. Literally nothing tastes like chicken except chicken.