• Member Since 23rd Dec, 2014
  • offline last seen Mar 29th, 2018

Violently Irrelevant


I write fics, I do talky-talk readings of fics. Find them on YouTube.

Comments ( 15 )

will I like this story

The protagonist is certainly a character but it was better than seeing a cardboard guy with no personality. Not sure why this got so many down votes, seems simple enough. Pervy farmboy gets caught, then shenanigans. The characterization of "You" with the daydreams and following 'clever paths' was a nice touch and made him seem fresh compared to other "You"s written by folks.

Constructive criticism wise, the beginning was a little vague, it felt like a long dream sequence almost with so much emphasis on thoughts and feelings rather the the surrounding setting, and the switch in paragraph format once he's found out seemed out of place.

5568374
Lovely. Thank you. This is a product of horrendous sleep-deprevation and will most likely be revised once I've had a good rest.
I'm happy to get some good critique and it will be put to good use. Thanks again, every tidbit helps!

5568459 I must say your story made a nice comeback

5569432
Cheerio. It's all little wobbly steps towards amusing people with the fiction I amuse myself with.

Interesting, would like to see more

5584136
There will be more.
There will also very probably be improvements to this part.
Thanks for reading!

5584537 Ofcourse, keep it up!

Please continue this! i want to know what happens next!

5633082
I will, it's in the works and works are slow but believe me, more is coming!
Thanks for reading.

Huh, I found this story one year after it was posted. No real reason to post this comment, just a thought that mildly entertained me.

6886091
Very happy to get comments. This one has been on the work-list forever...
Big thanks for reading and letting me know!

7199034
I probably should. I never abandon anything completely but there are alot of things on ice.
I'll look this one over again and put it back on the work-table.

V8

7199988
Any chance of this getting revived?

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