• Member Since 21st Apr, 2013
  • offline last seen Yesterday

Rikkity


T

(REWRITE IN PROGRESS!)

A modern mage transports himself to Equestria in an attempt to flee from those who would destroy him. His escape to this world of ponies might be the best thing he ever did. Or will it be the worst since another like him seems to have made his way there as well?

Not everything is as simple as he would have liked to put it, and he will learn that isolation may not be his friend this time around.

This fic will no longer be set in Ungrounded's universe! (WILL UNDERGO A REWRITE)

Chapters (7)
Comments ( 64 )

Pretty cool stuff there, duder. Keep on writing.:twilightsmile::rainbowkiss:

I am the merry model of a modern mage-er general. :pinkiehappy::heart:

I am here however because a story under 100+likes was submitted to The Good HIE List and didn't follow the rules of submission. :trixieshiftright: I read your chapter, I saw what you got, and I shall continue to see. There's ways this could end up out by the ignorance of our rules alone but the group is for stories not for governmental management. So I'll give it a watch and talk to the other admins about it.

But please, if there’s any story you want to submit, read the rules. They're there for a reason. I even made a gif for that for crying out loud. You can't miss it.:rainbowhuh:

So anyway, it's considered, but it's not in our folders for the moment. See ya around.:unsuresweetie:
:

4070101

Oh okay, my bad. I was kinda putting it in folders today, I didn't realize I put it there. I'll go look at the rules.

Again, sorry.

I am not seeking to put this there in the list. I normally go through there to read the fics that do have that kind of reputation. I am not a big time writer, so I may not even make it in there any time soon.

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I don't think there's any big time writer here. Only many that like one type of story. Good stories are not always recognized. That's maybe the best point of the group.:ajsmug:

4070379

Well, let's hope mine qualifies for good then :twilightsmile:

Okay, this has great potential. Keep it up bro~!:ajsmug:
... AJ is best pony...

4079909

Eeyup!

And thanks!

I'm going to get started on chapter two soon. I gotta finish getting it outlined.

A pretty good start. If you can keep it up you might get this story to start an entire Ungroundedverse area here.

4105400

Yeah, we're gonna try and make it a thing :P

4106207 For the record, I'm floating around in there somewhere too. I gave him the metal to forge Harmony after all.

4106699 Chapter 10. The note was me. Just a handy reference if you don't remember.

Cool stuff, duder! Keep on knocking out those chapters.

It's good, but I wonder if you are writing this on your own, or are working in conjunction with Sandcroft?

4559931

I am in fact writing in conjunction with sandcroft. Any of the dialogue or actions done by Aiden are written by me. Lucien is also written by Sandcroft due to the fact that it is his OC, and I don't want to do anything that would make him seem OOC.

Anything else written is what we both had written are scenarios we thought might work. I really hope to not screw this one up though.

You did show what Aiden is capable of quite nicely. Looking forward to more. :pinkiesmile:

I demand more to be posted... in the meantime, I will now read chapter 4

Hmm... this story seems to be lacking a fifth chapter...

Aiden can do better than A FILTHY DAMN MUD PONY!!!!!!!!!!!. Super cool though.

I can't help but wonder why they would be after Aiden, but not go after Lucien? What does Aiden possess that Lucien lacks? (aside from a sense of proportions *snickers*)

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Oh how dare you, sir! We shall settle this like gentlemen. :moustache:

4755252

Stuff that is to be revealed pretty soon.

4755350 Well that's good. The suspense is terrible. (I hope it lasts! :rainbowkiss:)

4755349 *hands Jake a vorpal sword*

Can Aiden summon a new familiar? Wouldn't it be awesome if he contracted a deity or something cool like a powerful spirit or legendary warrior/creature? Maybe he should try summoning a new familiar, if the rules of his magic allow for it. It might help Aiden deal with all the issues he has. I don't know, I guess I'm suggesting this because I've seen anime like Fate/Zero and played games like Brave Frontier recently. I wonder what the author thinks about this.

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It's probably not a bad idea. I'll definitely consider it, but it's going to be tricky to pull off. I can't just do something like that on a whim.

Thanks for the food for thought.

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No problem. Although, if you'd let me suggest one more thing, I'd like to submit the soul of Starswirl the Bearded or possibly Clover the Clever as possible Equestrian Summons if you decide to pick someone from Equestrian lore. However, I would prefer to see what original idea you could create for such an addition to your roster of characters, should you decide on a familiar from Aiden's home dimension (and associated attached realms/planes of existence). Good luck and great job.

Knocking them out pretty quick! Keep up the awesome work.

Great story! I'd love to see more!

That...was...wonderfully sad. :fluttercry: Bravo you magnificent bastard! (And I do mean that in the best possible way!) Bravo!

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Thank you! :twilightsmile:

I really enjoyed writing that scene, and made every last moment of it count.

Is this alive? Or should I get a defribulator?

5592971

It is alive and well. I am currently finishing, and editing a few scenes right now. Then I can put a proper ending on it. I have been really busy for a while too. It'll be up, I hope tonight.

5593277 IT LIVES!!!!! HURRAY!!!

5593297

Of course it does. It's better for something to come out good than to have it rushed.

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Should also mention that most of the chapter is a big flashback as a means to give more back story on him.

5593319 Thanks for the mention. Also but no offense...but why does Aiden act so...soft and essentially takes dispproportionate blame for his actions without complaint? He was assaulted in his own home twice, condemned as a criminal just because he defended himself from a slightly cuckoo older wizard and condemned as a threat to ponies despite living isolated and alone in monster infested woods for three years while never acting hostile and obeying the laws. It just seems wrong that he didn't adequately defend himself and is letting them judge him unfairly just because of his species. Also how did he lie to the bearers? From what I got out of the story, he barely if ever talked about his past, was a pony when interacting with them due to his potions, and just either never responded to certain questions or deflected them... so why are the bearers acting as if he betrayed them and did something unforgivably evil?

5593401

1. He acts so soft as means to not stir up conflict.

2. He doesn't adequately fight back because that can put him in a much worse position. Remember, Celestia and Luna are very powerful beings.

3. He lied about who he actually was. If he had actually overcame his fear of what could happen if he gets involved with the ponies directly, it can mean trouble for everyone. He does overcome that anyway in the future. You can say it's already happened, but there is more to come.

The answers are there, but I guess I was a bit vague here and there. I made Aiden as a very docile character, but he can fight back if his life was truly on the line. In any of the three cases mentioned, he is quite fragile. He killed his own friend in order to save him, and his ex-familiar sacrificed herself so he could get away from the hunters. He doesn't know exactly what to do.

If you read Ungrounded (Sandcroft's fic) you'd know exactly how they'd react to Aiden appearing in Equestria. This is something he also wanted to avoid. He wanted to avoid confrontation with the princesses at all costs as a means to remain isolated. If you take into account what he has been through so far, you'll have a better understanding of how he approaches things.

Part of his mindset due to his past experiences is "Stay under the radar."

ok I really like the story, but is this a sequel to another book because it seems that there is some info that needs addressing.

again I really enjoyed this chapter, but again, there are so many plot holes.
I am not tryin' to insult your work, Ah'm just wanderin' when, and why did the main six got magical weapons and got trained to kill.:applejackconfused:

5635302 wait, *reads first chapter of the book Underground, makes connection* oooooohh:derpyderp1: now it makes since. Ok now the only question is why didn't you tell us that this is a sequel?

4562612 ok now things are making since, sorry if I insulted your work your a great writer.

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