This story is a sequel to Blueblood's Ascension; or, Alicorns Just Aren't What They Used to Be
Braeburn's a pioneer. Rugged terrain is his home. Apples are his lifeblood. Path-finding is his mandate. But then he ascends to alicornhood, and things shift. Suddenly, he's a Prince of Equestria, a noble in name and deed.
Romance probably wasn't the first thing to pop into his head when a horn popped out of it.
Pinkie is a pony who needs no introduction, but she would insist on one. Where there is cake, she will be baking it. Where there are parties, she will take part. Whenever a pony needs a friend, she's the first in line.
To her, Braeburn feels... a little different.
When the two ponies meet semi-officially, change takes place. Friendships are strengthened, bonds are challenged, and at least one evil enchantress seeks to crash the party. As far as Pinkie's concerned, it sounds like a Tuesday.
All things considered, though, it's going to be an interesting courtship.
*Sees a story with Cheese Sandwhich*
*Clicks*
*Braeburn's an alicorn*
NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE
Oh Jeeze not one but TWO levels of beautiful crackyness. Up voted for concept alone. Will read later.
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Braeburn's an alicorn, yes. So is Blueblood, Lightning Dust, Redheart, Lyra Heartstrings, Vinyl Scratch, Trixie Lulamoon, Flim Flimflam, Donut Joe, Soarin, Granny Smith, Derpy Hooves, Peachbottom, Hoity Toity, Mrs. Cake, Cadenza, Luna, Celestia, Twilight Sparkle, and Sombra.
Braeburn as an alicorn is not the strangest thing about the series.
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I've been writing about ponies becoming alicorns for so long I forgot just how cracky it is! Ha!
So yeah, this is gonna be just a little crazy, but fun.
I hope you like it once you read it!
I'm pretty sure we faved each other's stories within thirty seconds of each other. Either way, keep writing because I really liked the Blueblood story and am looking forward to this one!
Oh, start at the end then take us to the beginning, a fun way to start off a story!
Those two were definitely bratty toddlers.
I was honestly surprised by an omniscient narrator that wasn't interrupted by Pinkie Pie.
A 1930s comic reference? I guess we're going for highbrow and obscure.
Full name accepted into headcanon!
I love it. I wonder if he's told Pinkie she has a Sentais de Rose.
Yes, lots of tremors, Tremors indeed. I'm pretty sure this makes Braeburn Kevin Bacon, and I'm ok with that.
Ah, I thought Braeburn was gonna pull the same trick Kevin Bacon did, and stomp on the ground next to the canyon until the worm tunneled right out and fell.
Oh hell yes! I assume Cheese Sandwich was wearing a Caribou helmet at this point, and that Appleloosans will make this Taztlwurm-Stomping day a yearly tradition!
Nice, no pulling a thorn out of its paw, Braeburn's gotta do this the hard way.
You gotta be careful with how awesome you are making Cheese Sandwich, otherwise the question will start being asked about why Big Mac still gets to be Best Colt, cousin or no cousin.
"little something" is 40 proof, right?
I gotta say, I really appreciated the use of "to share and to care" in their wedding vows.
Damn, Braeburn. Apparently it was time for some thrilling heroics, and our boy here really stepped up.
It's interesting that this is just the second ascension, or at least the second stallion ascension, that puts us pretty far back in the overall timeline of the series.
He's too sexy to be a prince
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I saw that!
Great minds think alike.
This one's gonna be super-fun. I'm already giggling about the next chapter.
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It's like the most relaxed in medias res you'll ever see.
Yes, but they still have their sweet moments. When they're not eating the furniture or phasing through the walls.
I thought about it, but that is the single deadest dead horse joke on the entire website. In the entire fandom. I couldn't think of anything fresh to do with it. So we'll have to settle for the general shenanigans of putting Pinkie, Cheese, and Braeburn in the same room.
Life is hard.
My paper still runs Blondie. I had no idea how obscure I was being. You young kids have heard of Snoopy, right? Right?
Now to fervently pray I didn't accidentally steal it from someone.
Braeburn... as played by Kevin Bacon...
No. No, the world is not ready. It's just not ready!
It's to be expected!
I'm telling you, that's the story of Braeburn's life.
You gotta bear with me, this is the first time I've written Cheese. I've got a lot of excess awesome pent up inside me that can only be channeled through writing third-best pony. Big Mac'll get his moment to eeyup.
I was thinking whatever ponies call Tylenol, but that works.
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I thought it was a nice touch.
This is a direct sequel to Blueblood's Ascension Part I. Braeburn was already an alicorn in both Background Ascension and Part II. Coincidentally, this also starts the story in late season three of the show...
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He's too sexy to not be a prince! That mane, man. That cutie mark. That smile. Hoo, baby.
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Knowing when not to use a joke? That's advanced comedy. I liked it, my expectations were confounded.
Of course, he sold me my dental insurance.
Well I can prove Braeburn is Kevin Bacon: Does Appleloosa still ban dancing? No? Ipso facto Braeburn is Kevin Bacon. If only I knew enough about his VA to do six degrees...
In my dreams I see the glorious spiked boots of the foals!
If it weren't for hard luck he wouldn't have no luck at all.
Sooooo, your solution to making Cheese excessively awesome is to compensate by also making Big Mac extremely awesome?
I like this plan! Also, I now need to know 1st and 2nd best ponies.
Ugh, who mixes Tylenol into their coffee?
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I'm noticing a conspicuous lack of Cadence in that list...
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I look forward to seeing your "confounded" become "compounded."
Of course, in Imperial Equestria, it becomes Six Degrees of Leaven Baking, from whom Braeburn has two degrees of separation, since he and Braeburn's mom went to school together.
I am gonna have to remember to use that line in my daily life.
All signs point to "yes," but you'll have to tell me if the plan gets executed properly.
Pinkie Pie is the tippy-top, since her attitude in the "Smile, Smile, Smile" song is the kinda person I aspire to be. When she's written right, she's an unstoppable force of fuzzy warm feelings.
Rainbow Dash, while being in the same tier, is second. She's the most fun to write, and every word out of her mouth makes me smile. Sometimes it's a sad smile when her bullheadedness shows through, but it's there.
Cheese Sandwich, also in the same tier, hold a special place in my heart because he's The Gosh Darn Weird Al. And the scene when he reveals his troubled past to Pinkie warmed my heart something fierce.
I don't drink coffee, so not me.
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Aghast! Egad! This is a wrong that must be righted. I'll just edit that straightaway.
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Am I bad person for assuming that Leaven Baking is an earth pony, since he has a food name? But I believe he has a unicorn daughter (well currently human daughter) just based on her hair.
Just remember I stole it from either a Steven King novel or a country song.
I await the Mac Attack.
Yeah, she's definitely a one-pony condensed form of why so many of us got into the fandom in the first place.
Rainbow has never been my favorite, except when she's near Scootaloo (one reason I love your Rainbow so much is she's so often Scootaloo adjacent, using her bluster for inspirational purposes rather than ego-gratification). I suspect so many writers love her because that ego makes her fun to write, like a certain other pony
Can't argue with you there. I saw that Radio Shack commercial he did and I was like "How is that not one giant Cheese Sandwich reference?" He even has a shout out to an obvious brony!
That was so touching, it makes you wonder if Albert Yakovich was himself quite the shy lad before he picked up the accordion.
Oh man, Big Mac is gonna have to come out to Appleloosa just to inform Braeburn about "Cousin Pinkie!" Sure, 4th cousins are kissin' cousins, but he still deserves to know...
Cheese Sandwich is Weird Al pony. He's that good.
As did I. Yeah, that wasn't Pinkie's best moment.
Did, Cheese Sandwich just throw a giant pie in a Tatzlwurm's face. Wow. I, just wow.
He did.
Technically, it tells him where ponies are going to throw a party, since he IS a professional Party planner.
Eeyup.
Wait, now I want to read about Nurse Redheart!
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Lucky for you then! She's the main character in the first Background Ascension short-story, she's a side-character in Blueblood's Ascension Part II, and she's one of the mains again in Blueblood's Ascension Part III! I hope they're as fun as you hope!
What a cheesy party.
Oh you clever pony. And it's gotcha.
Wanna bet? Also, since Braeburn is Pinkie's husband, maybe her relationship with Cheese is either as friends, friendly rivals, or maybe like siblings in a way? The latter would be kinda cute, but, eh, your fic.
I love this pony!
Somepony got a schoolfilly crush?
*snerk*
OH GOD MY SIDES!
It's not impossible, but, it depends on what you consider fun.
Good sirs and madams on this site, could I bother any of you to help me look for my sides? I seem to have misplaced them.
Well, you did inspire him, and he's Weird Al pony.
HAH!
Rarity used cockblock! It's Super Effective!
To you maybe.
PINKIE PIE!
I sense a disturbance in the plot, as if Rarity was about to meddle.
Exactly.
Eeeyup.
Hay is for horses. I'm sorry, I had to, but here' it's be hEy, with an E.
You were saying?
RUN!
It's glad to see this rapidly-rolling barrel of laughs moving forward again. This chapter is all about how awesome Rarity is in every way, whether it is snarky Rarity, classy Rarity, or meddlesome Rarity.
5790443 Has already pointed out how awesome Rarity's lines are here, but I wanted to focus on the difference between Applejack and Big Mac's answer here. The Apple family grows and loves apples, but they are able to enjoy plenty of other fruits and flavors, they don't mono-maniacally focus only on apple-flavored treats to the extent of all kinds.... Well, with one exception (FF#10,
will not eat non-apple pie!)
Jeeze Rainbow, what makes you think Rarity could possible fall for some skinny, lanky pony who travels from town to town and is always seen at fun and Trendy events?
Yes, yes the ship is strong in this one!
But Rarity, what would Cadance say? You are attending a coronation party for the only single Prince in existence you don't despise, and you are neither setting youreself nor any of your friends up with him? Tsk tsk. Cadance would already have sent Fluttershy over to ask this prince if he's befriended any strange animals in his wanderings, told Pinkie Pie to compare parasprite-repelling stories with that handsome marching band stallion, and still found time to insinuate to Rainbow Dash that this is the perfect time to challenge Big Mac to a hoof-wrestling contest! You still have much to learn 
I should point out that the yelling and bad manners should inspire less fear in Fluttershy and more shame, but I suppose the effect is the same.
That's not a craze Pinkie, that's just you!
Can you imagine if the CMC had gone with the Mane 6 to Appleloosa the first time and been kidnapped instead of Spike?
There would have been no peace settlement, the ponies would just show up the next day to find the desert somehow on fire and a note from the buffalo saying they were moving to the badlands, it's safer there.
Everything in its proper time and order, after all.
Rainbow's crushing on Mac, eh? I don't remember from future stories if that goes anywhere or not, though I suppose future chapters of this one will probably clear that up.
Heh.
Wait, no, the chaos of an unplanned anything!
Uh oh, Rarity's going matchmaking.
Fun dynamic between Braeburn and Blueblood. I can definitely see where Blue is coming from, being the sole prince in a land of princesses probably comes with a set of issues.
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Quite. The ham comes later.
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Huh. So it is. I kinda figured it was a funny made up word that didn't have a proper spelling. I guess it's a funny made up word with proper spelling.
A little bit. Maybe a mix of all three. Granted, they haven't actually met yet so their relationship is "Distant Admirer, Oblivious Target."
Maybe just a little.
The Code of Rarity:
There is no awkwardness, there is only cuteness
There is no embarrassment, there are only blushes
There is no obliviousness, there is only unawares
There is no unrequited, there is only potential
There is no lust, there is only passion
There is no anger, there is only forgiveness
There is no meddling, there is only shipping
There is no loneliness, there is only love
Yeah, I know. I just do it because it's another excuse to get away with a lame pun. I have gotten away with it until now.
When faced with a choice between grammatical correctness and a lame pun, the lame pun always wins out.
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I also hold a deep appreciation for inspired Rarity, distraught Rarity, and romantic Rarity.
Really, she's one of my favorites. That shouldn't surprise you, though.
Big Mac also hates cherry pie. Nothing against Cherry Pie, but cherry pie can burn for all he cares.
I like to imagine Applejack as an apple zealot, who seeks to advertise her farm and produce at every opportunity (even amongst friends). She's got the mark of a businessmare, after all.
Here's the funny thing: Rarity's going to meet Dark Shadow Lightning before she meets Trenderhoof, meaning that the episode in question did not happen as it did in canon. The guy still had an attempted romantic rendezvous with Applejack, and she still rebuffed him, but sadly, Rarity did not go berserk trying to be Applejack.
And lest you forget, Dark has a heck of a lot more muscle on his rump than Trenderhoof.
She knows this prince. It's Braeburn "Appleloosa!" Apple. They've all interacted with him a little bit. She probably thinks he's in a relationship with Little Strongheart, or that he's too familiar to think of as a potential romantic partner.
I mean, just speculating here. She might be aiming Cheese Sandwich in Pinkie's direction so that she can have Braeburn all to herself. Everypony's happy!
That's going to be even more clear next chapter.
The yelling and bad manners she's referring to are from the time he yelled at her. After she placed the last straw on his back and he exploded.
Fear would totally be the reaction.
And they still wouldn't have gotten their cutie marks, darn it! They're running out of civilizations to destroy and ecosystems to demolish.
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They never ever interacted in the other stories. Seriously, not a single scene was shared between the two. They never even mentioned each other. Big Mac only appeared in one scene* in Even Alicorns Have Dreams, and at the end he got a kiss from Luna.
But that's no reason to fear. Trust me when I say this subplot gets bonkers.
*Technically two, but he didn't have much presence in the second.
Yessireebob. This subplot gets pretty bonkers.
A set of issues that gets foggier with each stallion that ascends.
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I think we all love Rarity stuffing herself with ice cream.
Oh schemey Rarity, you another one of my favorites.
Oh yeah. Forgot that Fluttershy helped push Blueie on the path to some character growth, back in the day.
They'be be like the original Dragonball series, where Goku was sent to earth as a baby to basically wreck the planet in a tantrum. Cutie Mark Crusaders get launched inside a probe into the heart of the changling hive, within 3 hours there are no survivors except 3 fillies wandering out of the entrance, arguing over whether the changling goo they are covered in is similar to tree sap.
Was about to call her a liar before I remembered that she dodged her own coronation.
Why was this cancelled?
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A combination of bad timing and bad planning. It was a mercy cancellation. Merciful to my readers and to me.
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You can read about it in more detail here.