Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves. -Henry Davis Thoreau. "I've heard that quote several times over the course of my life, but only now am I finally beginning to understand just what it meant as I wander through this God forsaken land."
"My thumb removes the holster’s guard, and I pull the pistol from its place on my hip and bring it up. My finger squeezes the trigger but all I hear is a soft click. The wolf’s ears perk forward as I do, and it leaps without warning..."
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Chapters (4)
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Just wanted to say i like this and look forward to another chapter.
6112962 Thank you, I worked pretty hard on this, but its fun! I'm starting on the next chapter tomorrow...
Everytime i come to your little language script thing i keep seeing 'welcome to eternity'
For that quote alone, you've earned The King of Pirates' attention. Thoreau was a magnificent bastard.
6113040 Close but no cigar. It is actually Equestria, but I'm sure you've thought of that too. It is an original language that a friend of mine and I came up with together. I created the symbols and their meanings corresponding letters. I have full alphabets for Pegacilian, Earthen, Unicornian, and Equestrian. I was bored. What an I say?
I'm all for this, though, he's being a bit dense. I mean if I was in that condition, I'd try and ask for food.
6135632 Indeed he is. He will grow to know who is the enemy and who is the friend soon enough. Love your profile avatar by the way!
6137157 Thank you, got it from Deviant Art.
Not Yet Cool Drawing
This is very good! I like the fact that you didnt instantly make him befriend the ponies.
Dis gud. I wanna see more. Do you have a schedule perhaps?
6237533 Next chapter should be out before Tuesday! Thank you for your interest; It only gets better from here!
6246138
Awsome!
I should have known it was you who was writing this, Jet. This is just as enthralling as Skies Ablaze.
One VERY important thing, however: you're mixing up past and present tenses during the narration. Stop that. Pick one or the other and run with it, not both.
So I believe Logan and the Crusaders are gonna cross paths, and there's gonna be a Diamond Dog kidnapping that he's gonna thwart by killing some dogs with his guns.
I hope it's not as cookie-cutter as it sounds like when you actually write it.
6271270 Well its nice to hear such a morale boosting comment, but I have to say that the tense transitions are intentional. I know its an unusual tactic, but its effective for the story. As I'm sure you know, the story's events are taking place in real time, not from a "storytelling" point of view. The past tense is used during the flashbacks because ...well its in the past.
Buuuut, after we find out what happened to get him to Equestria, there shouldn't be any more past tense..
6271452 I don't mean flashbacks, I'm talking about within present time itself. More accurately, when you switch away from Logan's POV to a third person perspective, you start writing in past tense. It'd be best to avoid that, just write the 3rd-person ones in present tense as well. It'll look good.
Though I thought I'd seen past and present jumbled within the same persent Logan POV section, that was a mental trap, so my bad. I wasn't remembering it right.
Boy, hope the rabbit isn't Angel...
But he had to do what he did to survive. He made the mistake of fleeing Fluttershy's home out of fear. Bad move. But people often make bad decision out of fear.
6271555 ...I won't lie, I did give that thought.
6271555
Apart from a missing S in "decisions", this deserves to be a VERY widespread quote.
6272961 ...Wut?
6288484 Fear makes people make dumb decisions, old boy.
Great story! Cant wait to read the rest of it!
6508173 Thank you! The next chapter is close to completion and I think you guys are gonna like what's in store...
Hurry with the next one!
Hopefully you'll write a chapter from his perspective explaining why he saved them and what he witnessed. It would make more sense that way, at any rate.
6529043 Quit reading my mind...
6531947 Sorry, just makes sense from one writer to another.
6514214 good story do more
6531947 more please
6529043 Funny you should mention that...
7848912 Squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee... where is it?!?!?!?!?
7850073 In the works and making great progress. My new year's resolution was to get back to writing and exploring my creativity again. Been going very well so far.