Zero Room

by FiveyWhooves

Just Act Natural

And suddenly. . .dragons.

The Doctor expected to see another pony as he approached the treehouse library and knocked on the door. However, that wasn't the case. A short, stubby, and lavender/green mini-reptile without wings responded instead.

A dragon.

Okay, the Doctor has seen weirder.

"You must be. . .Twilight?" the Doctor guessed as the small creature opened the door.

"Nope, I'm Spike," the small dragon replied. "Twilight's out for the day with her friends. Whad'ya need?" The Doctor blinked.

"Well," he said, trying to think of an excuse to hide his real intentions, "I'm an anthro--ahem, sorry--equinologist just passing through town and somepony told me that this library was excellently equipped with resources. If you don't mind, I'd like to borrow a couple books?" Spike gave the Doctor a weird look at first, but believed him anyways.

"Sure, why not? Come on in." The Doctor entered the treehouse to find the entire place was hallowed out, the internal rings giving pattern to the walls. Notches were cut out of the tree as well to serve as bookshelves. Based on the shelves at the end of the room, the Doctor figured the library went a couple of stories up.

He wasn't too impressed with the size, but a library was a library.

The Doctor looked around the main room, mainly at the decorative wooden horse-head, a sleeping owl on a perch in one other corner, and very odd posters and blueprints that were plastered to the walls.

"Oh, that's just Princess Twilight's new focus of study," said Spike, noticing the Doctor was looking at the blueprints of an oddly-shaped box. "You know how she is, always finding something new to freak out and go OCD over."

"Hm, interesting," the Doctor replied. "So this is the home of your ruler."

"What?"

"You said Twilight was a princess, or monarch, of some kind," continued the Doctor. "She lives here? Or she just studies here?"

Spike gave the Doctor a look that made the Timepony feel uncomfortable.

"What, no. . .Twilight kinda has power, but I mean, she's just kind of a princess, and yeah she is Princess Celestia's prodigy, but that doesn't mean Celestia lives here, she still lives in Canterlot with Luna," Spike rambled. The Doctor bit his tongue. Now the conversation was getting really weird. . .and beyond his knowledge.

"Oh, yes, of course, how silly of me to forget about. . .that," he stuttered. The Doctor cleared his throat. "Well, as you know I come from very far away and I haven't got much time, so if you could-"

"You come from far away?" asked Spike as he showed a childish enthusiasm. "Cool! Where?"

"Farther than you've been, I'm sure."

"Try me, I've been to the outskirts of Equestria, or at least my friends have."

"That's just it. I'm not from Equestria," replied the Doctor. Spike's eyes widened.

"Whoa! That's like, impossible! There's no way that-"

"If you please," interrupted the Doctor, closing his eyes in irritation, "I would really like to get on with my studies."

"Okay okay, geez," Spike grumbled. "And I thought I was going to have a free day from a study-freak." The little dragon walked over to a door next to the front one. He opened it to reveal another wing of the library.

"Pony anatomy books are on the left side," he said. "There ya go." The Doctor nodded and proceeded to the wing. He then mentally decided that conversation with Spike should stop. He didn't seem like he was in the mood to deal with a rather confused Timepony.

The Doctor skimmed through the shelves, searching for various titles that would relate to his specific topic. It was difficult, especially when there were many of the books at his eye level were not what he had hoped to find, however any volumes higher up were a little fuzzy to read. He groaned internally at the thought that his brainy specs were still in his old coat pocket back at Rarity's shop. Truth be told, although the main purpose of the glasses were to make him seem more genius-like, they still had a purpose to serve.

The confused stallion looked around the room before spotting a ladder. That would help him, although he was just only accustomed to walking on hooves. Climbing the wooden rungs of a ladder would be a disaster. And there was no way the Doctor was going to disturb Spike, who was currently in the main room putting other books away. He didn't want to upset the dragon any further than he had.

I wonder if there is anything in Rarity's bag I could use, thought the Doctor as he shoved the white saddlebag off of his back. Struggling to grab the flap of the sack with the tips of his front hooves, he hardly managed to open it. The Doctor shoved his face inside the bag and was then struck with a twinge of bewilderment. Inside the bag. . .a gnarled wad of shoestring, a couple of safety pins, a red cricket ball, a magnifying glass, a notepad, and his very own brainy specs. . .everything that had been in his coat pockets!

How did these get in here. . .and when?! gasped the Doctor's mind. He drew to an inference that Rarity must have emptied his coat pockets and threw the items in the bag. That's either strangely convenient. . .or slightly frightening. The minute I get my tailoring done I may want to avoid that pony. . .

The Doctor then found a more puzzling thought: how was he going to get the specs on his head?

He slid the glasses out of the bag, the object then sitting in front of him on the floor.

Maybe if I just. . . the Doctor thought as he tapped the specs with his hooves and fumbled his feet to get a grip on the glasses. It was much more difficult without fingers.

Well that won't work, he then told himself. Perhaps. . . and the Doctor knelt down and picked up the specs in the edge of his teeth. He managed to angle them upwards, but the specs only tapped the end of his muzzle. The simplest task seemed impossible.

Until the Doctor came up with an impossible solution.

His mind set on his clever little plan, the Doctor took a deep breath. With the flick of his head, he snapped his chin up and let go of the specs. They swirled in the air before the Doctor positioned his eyes right below their landing destination. Crookedly, the glasses plopped on the Doctor's face. He pushed them into place with his hoof before giving himself a mental compliment on how ingenious he was.

The Doctor was able to see to the very tops of the shelves. He made out a few words on the spines of the books resting on the said shelves, with words relating to "anatomy" and "biology" of ponies. Bingo.

There was only one last obstacle. . .getting them down.

"You need help?" came Spike's voice from the doorway. The dragon was covered by a tall stack of books, his little lavender feet sticking out from underneath.

"No, I can manage, thank you," said the Doctor, slightly stubborn in his own pride. He had gotten so far with the glasses, so really, he was on a roll. How hard would it be to get a book from a shelf? Besides, the little Spike looked busy anyhow.

"Well, alright," Spike stated as he head for the ladder. The dragon easily climbed the wooden thing with the stack of books, and then carefully, like the volumes were glass, put the books carefully in their proper places.

Drat, thought the Doctor as his only resource was taken away. He now didn't have the ladder, yet Spike was taking a long time to sort the books, and the Doctor really just wanted to see if he could get the books himself, plus he was getting slightly impatient, what with Nyssa and Tegan that he still needed to rejoin and all the other things. . .

I wonder what it's like to jump. . . pondered the Doctor. It was a dangerous ponder. . .but the Doctor was a pony now so it seemed like anything could be possible. Hesitantly, the Timepony recoiled his legs. Silently half of him hoped that his glasses wouldn't fall off his face after his splendid trick he used to get them on. The other half of him knew for sure that the jump was going to end in a mess. And yet still, the Doctor made up a third half of himself just to ignore the fact the second half believed in.

Would a simple jump really end so poorly?

The answer came in two seconds.

Instantly when the Doctor jumped off of his hind hooves (which was really quite a clumsy jump) he strained his neck in hopes that maybe he could grasp one of the anatomy books in his mouth. He did. . .but as he fell back on his flank he shook the shelves and ricocheted all of the books down with him. There were many loud thuds of books and a stallion hitting the ground that filled the room with an awful momentary din. Spike, who had at that moment placed the last book in its place, stopped midway down the ladder and just dared to glance over at a pile of books that had toppled all over the floor.

"Um. . ." Spike muttered aloud. The Doctor's head, along with his blonde mop of hair, popped out of the books. He was amazingly still wearing his specs and holding a pony anatomy book firmly in his teeth. Spike just looked at him awkwardly. The Doctor grinned with equal the awkwardness and tried to appear innocent, even when he was surrounded in the effects of his misbehavior.

"Very sorry," the Doctor apologized through his teeth. Spike slowly stepped down to the floor, still giving the Doctor a look as if he really wanted to say "WHAT THE HECK DID YOU JUST DO?!". But instead, he froze and barely let out a few words.

"Can you. . .can you just ask me for help next time? Please?" he said, trying to hold back his dreadful shock. The Doctor nodded awkwardly. Spike walked over to the pile of books.

"How about you just read the books you need and. . .go home or something. . ." Spike continued.

"Sounds. . .good," said the Doctor as he stepped out of the massive mountain of volumes. Some of them scattered further on the floor. The Doctor and Spike just spent a couple moments. . .staring. . .at the books.

"Would you like some help?" the Doctor spoke with the book in his mouth.

"No!" said Spike suddenly. "I mean. . .no," he repeated calmly. "Just. . .read your book, alright? I'll clean it up."

"Are you su-"

"Yes!"

Author's Note:

Because from now on the two different Doctors in the story will be running about various places, and sometimes there may not enough context clues when this happens, the Doctors will be identified further as either "the Doctor(5)" or "the Doctor(10)" when they first appear or when they reappear in the chapters to come.