Octavia has been going out with Vinyl for a while, but now she doesn't feel like she can continue, so she writes Vinyl a letter to express the full extent of her feelings for Vinyl.
Chapters (3)
Liechtenstein
Joined 13th Feb, 2012 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- GhostieToastie · 9.2k words · 63 5 · 2.2k views
- ScarabCabinet · 3.8k words · 51 3 · 1.3k views
- WhirringGears · 3.6k words · 51 2 · 1.5k views
- Turai · 2.6k words · 50 3 · 1.4k views
- Sugar Moon · 676 words · 11 0 · 832 views
- Deathstrider · 11k words · 31 1 · 1.2k views
- Octavia777 · 3.4k words · 33 2 · 1.3k views
- Spot Light · 3.5k words · 53 9 · 2.4k views
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Stats
Page generated in 0.137 seconds
Total duration
968 users online
2,217,461 hits today, 2,280,440 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Well this got out of hand fast. I was downstairs, making my traditional hot chocolate when suddenly I thought of a way that someone could break up with someone whilst referring to their eyes being empty husks. This idea niggled at me and realised I could make this short story type thing to do with Octavia breaking up with Vinyl. I'm gonna leave this as incomplete, in case people actually like this story (which distracted me from updating my other, ongoing story) and think I could/should make another chapter. Also marking this teen to provide leeway if I choose to continue this.
480069 Not bad for a quick write, but some better spacing on the paragraphs in general will give a better flow and not make it so wall-of-text like.
But i enjoyed it, so thumbs up for you!
The formatting sucks but it is too good.....................
MY EYES
All my tears. Oh god.
Poor Vinyl
Good story though.
No more Wub?
Wow, really well done in my opinion... now if you don't mind I'm going to go cry somewhere
It.. It's so sad! I never even thought about anyone writing a fic where two characters broke up, but I think this one is a good one. It's short and bitter, and it leaves the reader wanting them to make it right. Bravo good brony, bravo.
http://equestrianbookclub.blogspot.com/
You may want to read this.
April 22nd
Oh goddess this is good. Realistic, and simply sad, just beautiful. Please do more, just so I can be hugged again. (Me --->
)
480640>>480645 this any better?
482398
Thank you. i would like to ask though, is the letter centering intentional? It seems kinda awkward. That's just a minor gripe though.
482596 Indeed it is. At the time I thought that centering the letter would make it look like letters in books do. At the time, though I forgot that despite being a written medium, centering the text on a webpage and centering the text in a book are two different things. Many of the examples of lettering in books I have seen have centred the words in the letter to show distinction from the text, with the exception of Bram Stoker's "Dracula", where the main bulk of the story being delivered through letters. I could easily change it if you think it would improve presentation, though; it is just a matter of deleting two things.
483341
Why does everyone format things like in books on.........
nvm lol....
my web nerd inside me is getting out of control
483353 because I am a part-web, part-literary nerd!
482018 I just read the review
I know it is short, but I didn't want to stretch out anything too much, I could've added more detail here and there, but all in all I think it does what I wanted to do
That . . . was good. But it really needed to be longer. Without context it didn't affect me or engage me at all. It felt like the climax to a story that was never written. I don't know, I'm not trying to be mean, but that's my opinion.
488513 Prepare for the worlds most lazy excuse in 3...
The whole story is kinda "in medias res", and I allude to a history which is never explicitly looked at. For the story I feel as if you can use any pre-existing notion/story about Tavi/Scratch, to kind of allow the reader to "fill in the gaps", as lazy as a trope that may be.
About the length, the whole story was based on one line that I thought up fairly late on at night, that line being "when I look into your eyes I see nothing". The whole thing kind of expanded on that concept, the concept of a total feeling to one's own partner. I did try to make it as long as I could, and as filled with detail but a lot of the times details I played with adding in seemed either completely arbitrary or unnatural, but that is probably my poor writing showing.
As for the ending I was a bit stuck on that myself; there was no obvious way to end it at the time. Truthfully I wanted this to be an epistolary story but soon realised the flaw in that. Instead I opted to end it in this way because I wanted to show that Vinyl was completely destroyed (as one is entitled to be at this point) and ending it with a "climax" seemed inappropriate given her current state. I also wanted to end it in such a way that it stood on its own as an (extremely) short story, but could also be added on to later, if the need arises.
Wonderful. I always enjoy Vinyl/Octavia, particularly when it is as well done as this story is. So is this completed, or will you be writing more? Not that it really matters, I added it to my favorites anyways and the ending works both ways, but I figured I might as well ask
491573 Well people seemed to enjoy it enough so presumably yes.
Of course I don't wanna rush anything out, so I'm playing around with a few ideas over how to write it. It is ostensibly a one-shot, so if it were to continue it would probably be only around 1 or 2 chapters of roughly the same length.
494042
Well I will keep an eye on that star icon, and the number beside it, which reside in my account bar then
Got to be strong...
Strong.... 
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooOoOOOOOOOOOOooo 
I'm alright now...
files.sharenator.com/funny_celebrity_pictures_swallow_sadness_like_a_boss_Meme_base_13-s500x372-156544-580.jpg
501222 I sense by your profile picture that Vinyl is unwilling to let go, and to her I say
images.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/10292090.jpg
Sadness :(
I put this in my 'read later' list, and finally got around to reading it. I'm so glad I did, this was really really nice. *O* I do hope you'll choose to continue with it. Tracking~!
pleeasee write more!!!!
I really like it... I hope you continue :D
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Finally got this out. Got a good idea of what to write yesterday, developed around it today. It probably isn't perfect; much like the last this is the product of a nights work. I will finish it, in a third and final chapter, expected to finish it in this chapter, but as you can see it is not finished. Enjoy, all.
*Gasp* I completely forgot about this.....
WHAAAAAT?! That's it?! (for now of course...) What a DISPLEASING CLIFFHANGER! GRRRRRRR! As always excellent work, although I cannot stand cliffhangers for any significant duration of time! This must be remedied
Just one small correction that threw me a bit: 'Do I know, oh' should be 'Do I now, oh' and maybe there should be a question mark after it or perhaps a semicolon... I'm not really sure 
So yeah, keep it up and I await the conclusion/continuation! 
Can't wait for the last part!
Oh and thanks for the story update no complaints on my part.
Good, the approach is new and interesting. Sometimes, the end may a beginning
Would love to read more.
So, there we have it. This is the end. Sorry it couldn't be better, sorry it couldn't be more timely. I may write a "sequel" of sorts, but for the main part I'm letting the reader decide how it ends. If I was you I'd include explosions and a carriage drag race. If anyone was actually waiting for the concluding chapter then I'm sorry it took so long, if you're one of the people who started reading after I finished then I apologise for nothing.
Truth be told I'm not entirely satisfied with this ending; it's too "optimistic", rushed and presumably all over the place, on account of how I wrote this basically paragraph by paragraph, but I, being the poor and uncreative mind that I am, couldn't think of a better way to write it. But, you know, I am a harsh bastard of a critic.
Happy reading.
How could a person POSSIBLY dislike this? I mean come ON!!!! It's a simplistic, yet emotional piece.
Here is a like, a fave, and a spike
Good luck on your future stories!!! I look forward to reading more from you!!!
It was a good chapter at all. However, it feels not related to the others. Well, still great idea in the fist place
"...couldn't think of a better way to write it."
Dude are you kidding me that was probably one of the best chapters I have ever read and if you'll forgive me I've seen some shit.
I am very sad to see that this is the end for this particular story. However you are entertaining the thought of a sequel which I hope you decide to write.
The best writers/authors/painters are usually their own worst critic.
You could have had Octavia brutally dump her, leaving Vinyl ultimately to suicide.
That'll get some heartstrings, i'm sure.
1126781 That was considered but it made me too depressed to write a pony suicide. I was also going to go with the slow slip into alcoholism resulting in liver problems, George Best style, before deciding upon the half arsed "open ended" ending. If it helps you could always pretend that's what happened hereafter. I'd plump for the overdose suicide option, because I can't picture where you'd get a gun from, or imagine Vinyl successfully knotting a rope.
I've been working my way through a backlog of stories, and after reading the last chapter in this after so long... let me say that it was simply awesome. I hope you find time to write more stories one day.
1128170 About the gun thing; it could be an import from the Griffin homelands.
1498706 As we all know, those griffins do not fuck around. i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/177/364/61922+-+Black_Lagoon+artist+john_joseco+crossover+gilda+gun+revy+voice_actress.png
I also hope that, but the college works us like mules, I'm writing a good two essays/exam questions, but I suppose that is my fault for taking what I did at A-Level, and this will only get worse as exam day and, in a years time, University applications approach.
Still, I should be able to work around revision and compulsory volunteering; especially since it's half term next week. Sweet, sweet respite.
1503793 Well, I wish you luck in your studies and for whatever you decide to write next. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Octavia2.png
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
*drowns in sad feels*
Poor Octavia. :(
5342988
really... really.... really? she performs what is generaly considered one of the top ten most selfish acts in history, and poor her?.....really?
and so Octavia comes to try and appease her guilty conscience, it's not that easy.
you know right now the one appropriate response from vinyl would be a slap to the face. Octavia decided to end it, with a letter no less, she doesn't get to decide when they talk, vinyl does.