V - Another World
Dear Journal,
What can we do to deal with an unstoppable change? Should we learn to live alongside it even when it's painful? Or throw ourselves in against all odds and try to inhibit its process?
These past eighteen months have taught me that change can be beneficial more often than not. I'm proud of the pony that I've been molded into, but getting to this point involved fighting and succeeding against impossible odds. If I could conquer the song of a Goddess, would it not be illogical to think I could right any wrongs that have adapted into my life?
I have two homes now, and one of them often makes me feel as though I'm going through another curse. I've tried to find happiness in my old home of Canterlot, and it's there, but the distance and silence of the situation keeps it obscured. After all I've been through, with all said and done...
How can one adapt to so much without getting lost in the wreckage left in her stead?
"Just twenty more minutes!" Bon Bon exclaimed from my left. Her scarf shook under the two hooves she held on her cheeks. "I've never seen a play in Canterlot before! I'm so excited!"
"You and me both!" I adjusted the sleeves of Rarity's refurbished sweater. "It's been years since I've seen a production from around here, and ponies I know are going to be up there this time!" The seated crowd around us were oblivious to our words. Each adjacent conversation might as well have been a loud jumble.
"Ohhh, poor Fluttershy," Bon Bon said with a dip of her gaze. "She must be worried sick backstage. I hope she does alright."
"She'll do fine!" I said. "By the time Fluttershy steadies into her comfort zone, she becomes just as sociable as any other pony! I'm sure I've mentioned that time she helped me with Al, and the parasprites." I rubbed my chin. "Although acting in a play doesn't really involve animals... Eh, she'll be fine. I have a feeling."
She giggled. "Do you? Well then, I guess I have no choice but to trust the instinct of she who brought Princess Aria home."
"Oh, stop it," I said, blushing.
"Something's on my mind, though," Bon Bon began.
"Hmm?"
"The tradition is that every town across Equestria has a pageant for Hearth's Warming, right?"
"Yeah, I believe so," I replied.
"Well, what about Ponyville? I've heard nothing about a play of any sort back home, and a lot of Ponyvilleans are here because of Celestia's cast choices." She pointed to Caramel and Wind Whistler a few rows up. "Not that that's a bad thing."
"The Ponyville pageant was actually cancelled this year."
We both turned to see a certain red-maned photographer who was a seat to Bon Bon's left just a row behind us. "Oh! Hey there, Scarlet!" I waved a hoof. "Was it? That's unfortunate. I'll bet the Mayor had something to say about that."
Scarlet laughed. "Mom was pretty furious when we got the letter, but I kept her under control. Almost everypony from our little town made train plans for Canterlot when Twilight went public with the news, and so it was decided that the royal pageant would serve as Ponyville's as well. I'd imagine that's why they changed the booking to Madison's Saddle Garden. There's more than enough seats here for the occasion." She laughed again. "Aptly named, don't you think?"
"Ha, it is!" I replied. "I never thought of that."
"Where is Mayor Mare, anyway?" Bon Bon's question was answered as soon as she voiced it.
"I've got the flower bits, Scarlet!" The Mayor squeezed through several seated ponies. "Two bags! This should be good for the whole play by my count."
Bon Bon and I giggled. "Enjoy the show, you two," I said.
"Thanks, and you girls as well!" Scarlet replied.
I put my gaze back on the stage as Bon Bon spoke past me. "So how have you been, Nova? Are you as excited for the play as we are?"
"Hmm?" Mom looked distantly towards my friend. "Oh. I've been fine, and yes. I can't wait to see Twilight." Her eyes rolled down to the floor. "If you girls would excuse me, I'll be back." She stood and squeezed her way out of the row.
Bon Bon watched her go through the exit with a raised eyebrow. "What was...?" I shook my head, running a hoof over my face before I felt her gentle touch on my shoulder. "Hey, is everything okay?" Bon Bon asked in a hushed tone.
"The split-up," I said while looking down. "She hasn't been taking it well since I re-entered her life. I thought coming back home with her for a little while after our week-long celebration would lift her spirits, but it didn't." I rubbed my forehead with a frustrated hoof. "Dad isn't here with us for the holidays because of how she's acting. Why does it have to be like this?"
"Shhhh..." Bon Bon ran a hoof along my back. "This is a rather unique situation they're going through, Lyra. The light of their lives was snuffed out without warning for almost two years. I don't know why they drifted apart, or if there's any chance of them coming back together, but I do know that your mother will come around eventually." She nuzzled me close. "All you have to do is support her in any way you can, and be patient." I sniffled before returning her nuzzle with a smile. "And I'm always here for you if you need to talk. We all are." She gestured towards the stage.
"I know," I said. "It's just difficult to process that after how long the Firmaments held me. To realize I'm no longer alone." I remembered when Dad came to Ponyville with Scarlet. "I'm so used to my words getting lost in time, and letting everything out to Al and no one else. Part of me can't believe I've even made it this far. I wake up some mornings hysterical like I used to when I was cursed, before realizing I can't hear the Nocturne."
"Lyra..."
"I feel like I'm losing my mind," I continued. "And Mom is distant, Dad is still traveling around Equestria... I know Mom will get better with time, as you've said, but what about me? What if there's some kind of long-term damage from the degeneration my mind was subjected to?" I gulped. "What if I'm slipping?"
"Lyra..." She had two hooves on my shoulders. "It's okay. I think you're giving all this a bit more worry than it's worth. We've all seen that you still talk, laugh and function just as any pony should." Bon Bon smiled while stroking my mane. "If this curse had any lasting effects, they would have been more prominent by now. You've been through a lot in a relatively short amount of time, and I don't think this is anything more than the stress of both old and new events piling up."
I stared into her blue eyes, letting out a sigh.
"And I'm thinking, how about you and Al stay with me for a little while when you come back to Ponyville after Hearth's Warming is all wrapped up?" she suggested. "I think you could do with a change of scenery from that cabin you were cooped up in all those months."
I rubbed the back of my neck. "Bon Bon, I don't want to be a burden to-"
"You won't be! Really!" she said with a giggle. "I've seen how well you take care of your own place, and I could do with some company myself. I just want you to be okay, Lyra, and I feel getting out of that cabin for a little bit could help you."
She kept her hooves on my shoulders with an unrelenting smile. How could I say no? With how my former home of Canterlot had treated me since I'd broken the curse, it felt like I was being saved again. "Alright. For a little while. I could help you with the baking, and maybe spruce up your shop a bit with some music? N-not that it isn't already spruce-y enough..."
Bon Bon giggled. "Yes. That sounds wonderful. I'd love it!"
"Yeah," I replied. "It does sound wonderful." Right there in the crowd, I threw my hooves around Bon Bon and held her in the same fashion as she had me nearly three months before. She returned the gesture without hesitation, stroking my mane again without a thought of the ponies around us. "Th-thank you for everything, Bon Bon."
We separated at the sound of a little dragon's amplified voice. "Attention, everypony! Our journey through history will begin in just ten minutes!" Dead silence filled the air. "Uhh, you all excited?"
A few ponies cheered with claps of their hooves.
"Great! Uhh, we'll see you soon!" He retreated backstage, and we both giggled.
"Maybe Fluttershy isn't the only one we should be worried about," Bon Bon joked. Her eyes opened wider, and she gestured behind me. Mom was trudging back through the row, turning a blind eye to the other seated ponies. She plopped into her seat with a sigh. Dry streaks covered her cheeks.
I smiled, taking her hoof and wiping one of her fresh tears away. "It's okay, Mommy. I'm here."
She returned my smile, moving close for a nuzzle. "And thank goodness for that," she said. I put a hoof around her, and the three of us sat in comfortable silence awaiting curtain call. Not a few moments later, however, something caught my eye.
Two radiant circles appeared straight ahead, brightening near the stage. They turned a blinding violet and moved above the audience, vanishing near the far right wall. I took a quick glimpse around. Nopony seemed to bat an eye.
"Umm," I said to my company. "Did you guys see that?"
"Hmm?" Bon Bon tilted her head. "See what?"
"Did somepony peek through the curtains?" Mom asked.
"I think so, actually." The right-side doorway entered my sight. "I'll be right back."
"Lyra?" Bon Bon grabbed my hoof. "What's going on?"
"There's someone who wants to see me," I replied. "I'll be quick. Don't worry."
Bon Bon let me go, and I was soon excusing myself as I moved up the aisle. The hallway on the right was empty, with the exception of a crinkling poster ad for some group called Iron Mare Den. "Hello?" I trotted past the ad and was hit by a cool winter draft. One of the balcony doors was opened, and her thin figure stood just outside against the crimson sunset.
"There you are." My legs shivered as I crunched through the snow to her side. "Hi there, Aria."
She gave me a nod with her eyes towards the sun, the cool wind whistling in the distance. "Lyra Heartstrings," she said in greeting. "I apologize for reaching out in this way. I was unsure of how to approach you directly."
I scraped a hoof in the snow as the crowd's faces filled my vision. "Yeah, I don't blame you for that." I giggled. "You look great, Princess." Her figure was filling in, as was her black coat, obscuring the runes burned into her flesh. Even her wings showed a hint of feathers. "You have your mother's mane."
Her gaze was on me at last, and she smiled. "My sisters have me on a 'diet', as it's called. They want me to be as healthy as can be. It unfortunately doesn't involve that wonderful cake substance the pink one gifted me, but it's good. I... I feel alive." She flapped her wings, smiling bigger as her ethereal violet mane flowed in the breeze. "I never thanked you, Lyra Heartstrings."
"Oh!" I fiddled with my sleeves. "It was nothing, Princess. Really. I just did what I had to do."
"You thought you were going to die here, didn't you?" Aria asked.
I gasped, stepping back through the all-too-familiar chills. "Huh?"
"When we came here to Canterlot," she said. "You thought you wouldn't make it, but you wanted to see us reunited if it was the last thing you did. How is that 'nothing?'"
"Well," I cleared my throat. "I-I didn't exactly have a choice, your highness."
"And that's my fault," she said, looking away. "Things would have been different if I hadn't intervened when you first met with Celestia."
"Uhh..."
"And if I hadn't interrupted Alabaster Comethoof..." Her voice trailed off, and she turned towards me before speaking again. "Despite all that, you still went on with me here in Canterlot to guide the way and be there by my side, after everything I did to keep you confined. After I hurt so many." Aria moved down to my eye-level. "So thank you for helping me to see the error of my ways, Lyra Heartstrings. We're all grateful for the sacrifices you've made."
I stared at her, my cheeks flushed. She blinked at my silence. "Did I say something wrong?"
"No! Of course not." I ran a hoof through my mane and let out an awkward giggle. "This is just so much, and so sudden."
"I see," she said. "Forgive me. I'm still getting used to conversing."
"Yeah, I'm having a bit of trouble myself after everything." I thought of Al's tear-smeared fur, and of Bon Bon. "You're doing just fine, Princess. Don't worry about the times you used your spell. Given your situation, it was beyond your control."
She paused for a moment, her ethereal mane flowing. "Call me 'Aria,'" she said with another smile.
I snickered. "Okay, Aria." My hoof scraped at the snow again. "Oh! I just had an idea!"
She moved back at my sudden realization. "What?"
"I could write you!" I said. "Kind of like how Twilight sends letters to Celestia! We're both trying to get used to everything after how long we were gone. I myself still haven't fully grasped that I can talk to ponies again without my words falling on deaf ears." I stepped closer. "We could learn and re-learn together. What do you say?"
She blinked. "It sounds appealing, as many concepts are foreign to me. My sisters have been helping me to learn how to write, as well."
I giggled. "I'll try to keep everything short. No promises." The sunset glimmered behind her. "So what have you been up to since your second visit to Ponyville? What's been going on at the Royal Palace?"
She eyed the most prominent structure on the beautiful horizon. "Well, through much trial and error, we've managed to unlock some secrets of my alicorn magic that the Firmaments kept obscured."
"Have you?" I asked. "What's come of that? What can you do?"
"Well," Aria began. "It seems that I'm capable of entering another plane. I can enter a realm that holds those who have passed on from this world." She looked up towards the lone, bright star that twinkled in the dim sky. "It's similar to how Luna can enter the realm of dreams. Some ponies have needed guidance and understanding in regards to their morality, which is what I provide. Rather than just caring for those who had been affected by the song, I now calm and soothe all who have passed with what this world has taught me. Through exercise of our magic, we were able to move those who served as my choir to this realm for their overdue rest." She looked me in the eye again. "This is how I know of your thoughts from just weeks ago, Lyra. That morning, you were close to this place, but you held on thanks to your sheer will and my mother's song."
A strong chill had settled within me, and it wasn't from the breeze. "Wow," I said. "Well, that's something. You definitely need to come back to Ponyville with Luna on the next Nightmare Night. The foals would have a blast."
She nodded. "Luna has already made me aware of this Nightmare Night. It sounds fun, as she says." She took a slow step in the snow as her expression became blank. "There was something else. One stallion in particular approached me when I made myself known. He'd inquired about a certain mare who'd visited him several times in his final days; a mare he'd forgotten about until weeks after his passing." There was a glint in her eyes as she smiled warmer. "His name was Granite Shuffle."
A bittersweet, unexpected note was plucked deep in my soul, striking me speechless. Something as beautiful and happy as this was the last thing I'd expected all throughout my cursed months. I stood there, melting under a single warm tear as Aria spoke on.
"Both he and his companion wanted to thank you for giving him the most memorable days he'd had in years. I told him what it was that led to your omission from his mind, and he felt that a part of your visits broke through the curse and resonated with him. You lifted his spirits before the end, and he couldn't be more grateful, in his words."
I hadn't realized how much I'd needed that until just then, to know that Granite was okay and with Grace. Aria crunched closer and placed an unsure hoof on my shoulder. "I wanted you to know."
I took her hoof and held it close. "Thank you, Aria. You have n-no idea how much this means to me."
She gave me a silent nuzzle until I was composed, in the same way she had the other lost ones before breaking their chains.
The other lost ones...
"You said there were other cursed ponies wandering the world besides Alabaster and me, back when we first spoke." I sniffled. "What happened to them? I haven't noticed anypony new or out of the ordinary since coming back."
She sighed. "Most of them were taken to the choir shortly after hearing the song. None of them lingered in the world as long as you or Comethoof," Aria said. "We've had reports of ponies reintegrating into society, but these are few and far between. The majority have been put to rest with those who were on the choir." She looked towards the side of Canterlot that Twilight and I used to live on. "Have you not heard? We're planning on having a memorial placed in the Alabaster District."
My ears perked up. "No, I haven't! That sounds amazing, but I thought you said there was 'no number' regarding those who were cursed. How do you plan on immortalizing them all?"
"Oh, there's a number," she said. "83,932."
I blinked.
"The Firmaments were rather selective all throughout history, resulting in a much lower amount of lost ones than we'd anticipated. It was easier to keep track of those in the unsung once we got them out. All of their names will be engraved, and Luna herself has made plans to have a sculpture of Alabaster Comethoof constructed, holding the Nightbringer."
"Wow!" I said. "When will everything be finished?"
"Two years at most," she said. "We wanted to have something featuring you as well, perhaps a sculpture of your own?"
I raised a hoof, picturing what Alabaster would look like in my mind's eye. "It's okay. I think my friend deserves the spotlight for this one. It was his actions that ultimately led to the curse's end."
Aria smiled. "Well, we're still going to name you on the engraving. You were a part of bringing their names back to history, after all."
I giggled. "Okay, that I can handle."
"Lyra?" I heard Bon Bon calling my name from the hallway. "Where are you? It's almost-" She stopped at sight of the opened balcony door and joined us outside.
"Hey there, Bon Bon," I said. "You've met Princess Aria."
"Oh! Hello, your highness! You look well." Bon Bon gave her a slight bow, and Aria replied with a nod.
"Is it almost time for curtain call?" I asked. Bon Bon turned my way and nodded. "Forgive me, Aria, but I don't want to miss a second-"
"It's fine. I enjoyed the time we had to talk," she said. "You are going to write, correct?"
"Of course!" I replied. "I'll send you a letter every week! Mail from Ponyville to Canterlot doesn't take too long. And once you get good enough yourself, you can send me letters of your own!"
She smiled and let out a hint of a snicker.
"Are you here to watch the play, Aria?" Bon Bon asked.
"Yes. Celestia said it would be important for me to see this part of Equestria's history." She looked over both her shoulders and spoke in a lower tone. "The three of us are sitting just above the audience, all the way in the back behind an invisibility spell. Don't tell anypony. Celestia doesn't want our presence to affect those on stage."
I snickered. "We won't, Aria. It was good seeing you again. I'll write." She nodded, and with a brilliant glow of her horn, she was gone. "Alright, let's head back."
We stepped onto the red carpet. "Is everything alright?" Bon Bon asked.
I imagined a middle-aged Granite Shuffle dancing with Grace as other ponies looked on with glee. I pictured what the stone sculpture of Alabaster would look like with the etched slabs around him. In light of it all, I saw myself at my mother's side, and playing an old rendition back in Ponyville at Bon Bon's shop. "Yeah," I said. "Everything is perfect."
"Once upon a time, long before the peaceful rule of Celestia..."
"It's starting!" I said.
"Hurry!" We both broke into a trot.
"...and before ponies discovered our beautiful land of Equestria, ponies did not know harmony. It was a strange and dark time. A time when ponies were torn apart...by hatred!"
We reached our seats just as the entire crowd gasped. I threw a hoof around Mom as Spike continued the introduction.
While some odds might be conquerable by sheer will and determination alone,
"...cared not for what befell the other tribes, but only for their own welfare."
...there are others that just can't be swayed in your favor no matter how hard you try to fix things. What I need to focus on is helping the ponies who have been affected by these odds while grasping that I myself don't have to keep everything inside anymore.
"The normally industrious Earth ponies were unable to farm their land."
Bon Bon, Twilight, Moondancer, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rarity... They're all here now to help me see the way through this wreckage. With their help, I in turn can be there for ponies like my mother, like Aria, who are scared and afraid in this world that I've spent the past 18 months observing.
"And so it was decided that a grand summit would be held to figure out a way to cope with the blizzard."
We cheered when Pinkie, Rainbow and Rarity came on-stage. A violet radiance shone from behind, and I looked to see the Princess of Twilight up in her seat. Nopony else turned around. Her eyes met mine, and she closed one of them in a wink. I returned it.
No matter what life throws at me, be it the ancient forgotten song of a goddess or a fissure that couldn't be averted, I'll always do my best to support and save those ponies around me who have lost sight of the music in their lives, and seek support for myself when the going gets tough.
Yours, as real as she is harmonious,
-Lyra Heartstrings.
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Awesome. I'm a sucker for a happy ending.
Great to see this here Malckeor. You've no doubt polished the fuck out of it, and it's a real treat to see in it's finality. Great work!
Wow I am happy somebody did this. Haven't read it yet.. It has been a while since I've read BP (it's one of my favorites) so I think I will go back and re-read that first beforehand.
As unexpected as this was, I can honestly say that I liked it. Excellent work putting a happy spin on the train wreck of feels.
Another alt ending found! Posted in the comments of the comic's re-uploading
Looks like that one was made sometime around or before September 2013
I'm a sucker for the happy ending, too... and find it much better and less convoluted than 'canon' BGP.
5004547 Believe me, it does. Thank you.
I like it a lot. Very good ending of a great "Background Pony".
So... I happened across this a little while back and thought it would only be right for me to re-read all of Background Pony before giving this a read.
So now that I have... What do I think?
Well... In a lot of ways, I actually like this, and not just because it's a happy ending.
I'll be honest and say that to spite how much I love SS&Es writing, I have a certain distaste for it's ending, but not because the ending was tragic. Heck, I even feel like the decision Lyra made in the canon ending was better than the other options that Princess Aria presented, given the circumstances Lyra found herself in. What I did find unsatisfactory were those particular proposed circumstances, and once again I'll state that It's not because I found it to be too cruel.
Thing is... I found the whole idea that reality would tear itself apart if the Cosmic Matriarch remembered Aria to be plain out dumb and contrived. For all the build up the Matriarch has throughout the fic as something grand and powerful, it feels rather underwhelming to have THAT be the reason for Lyra's curse. Honestly, ever since I read the 19th chapter of Background Pony the first time, I've had my view of the Cosmic Matriarch degenerated to this: A naive child who can't cope with loss.
Now... As realistic as it is to depict a mother's anguish at having given birth to a dead child, it comes across as completely underwhelming given just who the Cosmic Matriarch is. It just feels stupid to me that all of reality could be torn apart just because the Creator is throwing what some might equate to a tantrum.
So erm... Now that I'm done with that tangent. Time to get back to what I thought of this proposed alternate ending.
First off, the writing is quite nice on the whole technical spelling and grammar end. And you ended a large number of the open plot threads quite nicely. I'd say that there are only a few things I can think of that I wish were expanded on a tad bit more, but first I want to address what Authority2 mentioned in that this story as whole was bit excessive on "crying" and perhaps a tad bit too pandering to the folks who wanted a happy ending.
So about the few things I wish had been brought up or expanded on a little more. Honestly, perhaps it's not what a lot of people think of, but I would honestly have liked there to be some more conversing between Lyra and Caramel. I know you did bring it up, but given that Caramel did save Lyra upon the brink of suicide attempt, I was hoping that there would be some more dialogue between them.
Second, I personally can't help but wonder what would become of Lyra's journal. Now that the effects of the curse have been lifted, it would be possible for anypony to read it. Would the journal be kept entirely to herself, only something for her to read? Or would she be willing to share with others her literal story, depicting her struggle against the frigid frosts of Aria's curse, and all the good the endeavored to do, in spite of it all? Granted in your alternate ending, she had done that a number of times by word of mouth. But I imagine that Lyra may have glossed over numerous details in her recounting of it. Having her fellow ponies read the journal she had wrote in the midst of it all, in my opinion at least, some how feels more personal.
Heck, what of Alabaster's Journal? Now that I think of it, I bet Twilight would get a definite kick (to the heart) from reading it.
And one last thing. What about Discord? I actually feel that the set up you have presented here actually presents a much more plausible possibility for Discord to be reformed than his reformation in the actual canon of the show. Perhaps you may not of thought of it, but now that Princess Aria is back in the mortal realm, would it actually make sense for them to free Discord from his stone imprisonment? Would Discord be just as angry as before, given that Aria did banish him from her realm. Or would Aria and Discord's love trump all the hate that had built up in his heart?
All and all, I still feel this alternate ending covered a lot angles and was believable and well written enough to deserve a like, a favorite, and this little review.
5609706 Wow, you've sure given me a lot of thoughts. Heh, I'm glad you enjoyed it!
I'd originally wanted to have a written exchange with Caramel, but as the months-long process went on throughout that bittersweet summer that feels like it was a lifetime ago, I began to understand just how much stuff was going to be condensed into the project by the time it reached finality, and it unfortunately wound up getting cut. Along with my doubt at the time that I'd be able to do justice to what would no doubt be an extremely emotion-driven piece of dialogue, I just couldn't find a place to fit the exchange as there were other threads that I felt had much more of an impact on the overall story (Moondancer and Morning Dew come to mind as characters who I felt needed more thread-tying due to how they were handled in the original fic, in contrast with Mayor Mare and Scarlet who were reunited and happy, or Caramel and Wind Whistler who were happily married and didn't speak with Lyra practically at all outside of the second chapter; you could say that Morning Dew was happy with Ambrosia, yes, but the chapter featuring Morning in the original fic was much meatier than the second chapter featuring Caramel; he got so much development through his communication with Lyra that I felt it would be a disservice to NOT give Morning Dew and Ambrosia some kind of explicit exchange with our little unicorn during the party scene), so I opted for a minor mention of an exchange between Lyra and Caramel behind the scenes. Perhaps if I were to revisit the project and restructure a few things, I'd be able to find a place for a full-on exchange; I'm definitely feeling like a much better writer than I was five months ago, but in the words of Edna from The Incredibles, "I never look back, darling. It distracts from the now."
Maybe she did have them read it? She had the journal with her when she met with the musicians during the party, after all. ;)
I'll be honest, I combed the hell out of the original story when I was working on this (I might as well have re-read it two times over it with how many times I went back to study certain passages), and Alabaster's journal seems to have squeezed through my fingers. I never thought to do anything with it, even after re-reading several parts of chapter 11. Crap. Ah well; I probably would have done something small, like have Aria mention featuring a few of his written passages on the monument in Canterlot, or some other equivalent minor mention that doesn't involve disregarding the guy's privacy, but alas, Past Me seems to have overlooked this little thread. Heh.
Well, when I was jotting things down in the trusty notebook early in the process, I thought of it this way: the final two chapters of the original fic were published on the same day as the season 3 premiere if you can believe it, around two months before Keep Calm and Flutter On aired. The "latest" canon event referenced in the fic was the season 2 finale (in the twentieth chapter, when Lyra, IIRC, writes about recognizing Shining Armor's name in the royal wedding's announcement, and later being questioned by guards regarding changelings), and I really liked the premise that I had going with Aria and the Matriarch, so with this being an adaptation of the fanfiction more than the show, I pretty much wound up disregarding all post-season 2 canon entirely when considering the likelihood of inconsistencies with the cartoon itself. As for the later episodes of season 2 following the pageant, I'd imagined Aria either wouldn't be out as much as her sisters due to her nature and persisting social awkwardness in such a relatively short amount of time, or she would more often than not be too busy counseling the dead to partake in ceremonies such as a royal wedding; heck, Luna herself hardly had a presence during the wedding, even when the changelings went berserk, so I don't think it's too much of a stretch. Heh. :P
Regarding Discord's reformation, however, I myself would be able to suspend my disbelief enough to believe that the latter of your hypotheses would be the more likely outcome, if the series were to continue on from this point in the same fashion with Aria present. But that's me.
Anyways, thank you so much for your thoughts and the review, and the favorite of course. It helps a lot to see my work looked at from an outside perspective!
A very enjoyable read, and thank you for sharing it. While a few things were a bit awkward, overall it's a very good tale, and I did like where you diverted the story. A fanfic about a fanfic, but much as I had enjoyed the original, I felt it started wavering around the second half, and was wondering if someone would try to present a different view on how things could've gone.
5760394 Glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for your thoughts!
Oh...I haven't finished BP yet , but already checked Internet for alternate happy-ending. And I'm really happy , that I found it , but I'm more sad , because it's not translated on my language , so I can't read it (looks like joke , but it's not cool ;c). I hope one day I will find translation(btw I'm talking about Russian :p)
Brilliant. I bestow upon this tale the highest honor possible for anything... being liked by me.
Just got this linked to me on a Reddit thread, and I'm so glad I did. It's the best alternative ending to BP I've seen. There are some 'off' bits, but I genuinely think you manage to catch the 'Skirts' style of writing. It's a shame more people haven't seen this story.
6211741 Thanks! Wow! My notifications are going a bit nuts at the moment. May I ask that you link the thread in question? I'd like to take a look at what led to its linking and all that, for science. :P
6212782 Here you go . The thread was the mlp subreddit xpost of fallout equestrias subreddit getting SRotD
6213970 Ah. I haven't been on the subreddit lately as I've been busy with my next project and being addicted to Binding of Isaac Rebirth. Thanks for the link, and thanks again for the thoughts! I'm so glad you enjoyed it!
I think I needed to read this alternate ending, the originals been tearing me up.
Necroposting like a boss...
Thank you. The original ending was, as you said, lacking. The story, the mythos, and the way Skirts put everything together in the buildup was beautiful. But it honestly felt like he ended it in Act 2. Several parts of the "why" Lyra couldn't come back didn't work for me and didn't make sense given what had been previously established. I was hoping someone would reassemble those pieces into the happy ending Lyra deserved.
But you did more than that. You wove an ending that was beautiful, complete, and made me just as emotional as Background Pony did. In my headcanon, Background Pony is act one and two, and Crimson Sunrise is act three of a single great tale. You took a world another had established, with rules, characters, and a mythos, and brought it together in a way that fits perfectly with the original. For that, if nothing else, this is a masterful work of fanfiction.
I can only hope that one day I can write like you can.
6515729 Thank you so much for the kind words! All you've gotta do is keep at it, and you'll see yourself improving drastically in no time. I myself have a lot more to learn and can feel myself improving as we speak as I meticulously write throughout the months between my uploads, heh. The act of doing is super important for improvement, but observing is just as important. Take in as much media as you can from any medium, be it books, games, TV series, animation, etc. and let them inspire you. High literature snobs will try to tell you that you won't get anywhere unless you read snore-fest closed-minded books on writing 24/7, or be considered 'good' unless you experience a specific set of stories (Ulysses, Isaac Asimov, and so on), but while they're no doubt well-written works that are necessary at times, and in increments, literature and fiction is just way too subjective and diverse a medium to be simplified to such a formula; storytelling is so diverse nowadays that you can find incredible works of art just about anywhere. It's about what resonates with you the most.
I personally believe that the only thing 'objective' about creative writing is grammar, but even that is bendable to a degree as Tolkien, for example, has demonstrated in his Middle Earth novels (his editors rewrote 'elvish' to 'elfish' in one of the earliest renditions of Lord of the Rings, but later editions are fixed as Tolkien intended for the words to look as they did with the whole language system he developed). Other people are free to believe what they believe as long as they don't decree their uninformed opinions as 'objective' in order to undermine your own (like an insecure ex-friend of mine recently felt the need to), but nothing is ever set in stone; it doesn't matter if Shakespeare or Asimov or Tolkien said something. Bend it to your will and show everyone your own good story.
TL;DR: Enjoy what you want. Be inspired by what you want. Do what you want. Don't let anyone discourage you.
"Nothing is an absolute reality; all is permitted." -Vladimir Bartol, Alamut
Also, stick around with me if you'd like. I've got a lot more stories in the works.
Nice work.
6563274 Glad you enjoyed! Thanks for the chapter-by-chapter write-up. :)
Dear Malckeor,
Thank you. Thank you so, so much. When I finished Background Pony, I couldn't accept it. It was such a beautiful story, but I can't survive an ending like that. When I finally found an alternate ending, I immediately clicked on it. I felt as if Lyra didn't deserve the original ending, and she deserved to be remembered. When I finally got to the good part, I think I actually cheered, and when Lyra finally met her parents, I actually teared up. All in all, this is the most beautiful ending to a story that deserves an ending as phenomenal as this. To repeat myself, THANK YOU.
Your newest fan,
)
The 72nd Hunter
(not to be confused with Hunter #1-71
8136793 You're so welcome. I'm glad I could help you feel such happiness and closure. :)
Let me say first that I am so, so grateful for what you have done. Background Pony is one of the most beautiful stories I had ever heard and I had loved every chapter. Even the ending that was so tragic. Yes, you could guess long before that it will end that way and I get what they were trying to covey. Still, I did not find it only sad, I found it genuinely terrifying, enough to give me an existential crisis. (No seriously. I could barely move or eat. Lucky for me that I was not working that day.)
Then, months later, by pure coincidence, I found your alternative ending. It was such a relief after I had read it. I did not know I needed it. But what I mean is that it is not only a happier ending, you had made one of excellent quality.
You did your best to stay faithful to the poetic style of shortskirtandexplosion and that's no easy task. But the part I like the most is the resolution who was very in the spirit of MLP. It was her friends that gave her the spark of inspiration and with it, combined with her growth of heart she acquired during her journey, she managed to find a harmonious solution. Yet, after all is done, you make it clear that even if the curse is gone, it had still left marks on Lyra and she had to deal with the changes which make that conclusion realistic.
I know some had complained that Lyra was crying too much in Crimson Sunrise. But I say, no, this is psychologically coherent. The smiles she was giving in the past was a brave face she was putting up and now that she is in what she believes the last stretch, there is no more reason to hold back her true feelings.
You did a very good job and all can see that you had put a lot of efforts and thoughts. And once again, thank you Malckeor for that alternative ending that made us feel all better but still managed to honor that legend that is Background Pony.
5609706
Hoesntly, the original story did have a bit of parts that were lower points, mostly in the second half of the fic(though I do feel that some of the strongest chapters were there, namely 16, 11, and 12), though even as the Cosmic Martiarch created with a song, she is the first being created from Creation and despite the strong connections to song, I think her closer to something like gods like Zeus or Hera, where they aren't emotionally mature but incredibly powerful regardless.
As to how the Matriach destroys the universe(possibly multi-verse if you take discord's mention of worlds as something bigger), not only has she done so as mentioned in chapter 19 from emotional turmoil(in the way Discord is influenced heavily by his emotions and also does so near the end of Lyra's fight with him), and while this is also mre headcanon, I feel that in the same way that the Martiarch disliked the chaos and hence created a world there, she has something like a inclination to preserve creation conflicting with her besides motherly affection that makes her unable to truly accept Aria as she varies more towards a chaotic nature than either of her sisters.
10454423
Thanks for the thoughts and I'm glad I could brighten your day! Sorry for the late reply. Things have been crazy but I'm planning on returning to MLP fanfiction in the not so distant future. I've been working on something (unrelated to MLP) for the past few years and it's nearing completion. Once I'm done with that, I've got some ideas.
Fun times ahead.
10756210
Oho. That's good to hear. Can't wait to see what you have in store. Also, by the way, you will be happy to know that I had recently recomended your fanfic at the Official Recommended Stories Thread of The writter's group. Hopefully, it wil help to get The Crimson Sunrise more recognition.
10756569
Hey, thanks! Much appreciated! <3
10822015
By the gods I hadn't even noticed.
Background Pony was a beautiful story with a poetic and soul-crushingly depressing ending that I could never bring myself to re-read, as great as it was. I remembered the story today and was curious if anyone had ever written a happier ending, and saw yours in a comment.
You deserve a lot of praise for creating an alternate ending that fit in so well with the style and canon of the original. You called back to all sorts of key events from the original. It was so seamless that after nearly 8 years, I can finally imagine a world where Lyra wasn't doomed to fade into obscurity, but allowed to live her life after recovering from a curse that was truly worse than death.
10976309
Glad you enjoyed and I'm glad people are still finding this all these years later! I was like a lot of you when I originally finished the story, stuck in a loop of sadness that just wouldn't relent. It was on a turn around the corner two streets from home that the ideas started to flow, and I got to jotting it all down in a journal and eventually got to writing.
It took me the entire summer of 2014, the most difficult year of my life (for reasons separate from reading Background Pony, haha), and this was the result. A lot of writers, and artists in general, have a habit of resenting their earlier works, but that ain't me. I'm still proud of how this turned out, even in spite of everything I've learned and improved upon since.
Anywho, I'm hoping to return to MLP someday as I have a few ideas that have been bouncing around this mostly-vacant cranium of mine. Main reason I haven't gotten around to it is that I fell out of the show around season 6 and never went back to finish it, but I'll get around to it eventually!
I actually just recently put out my first story in a few years based on the video game NieR:Automata, so I'm doing my best to keep busy. I'm very much a leaf in the wind and tend to change my plans on a whim depending on how strongly something inspires me. We'll see what comes tomorrow! Haha.
The original left me utterly despondent like nothing I had encountered before.
This made me cry again - but in the opposite way.
You have no idea how much I needed this.
Thank you.
11367347
You're welcome! Glad you enjoyed! :)
Finally, Background Pony but good.
Jokes aside, as one of seemingly many who felt the ending of the original to be lacking, I'm glad this exists. I can't say I fully understand the method behind breaking the curse, admittedly since I personally wasn't as interested in that part, but the resolution and loose-thread-tying-up afterwards makes up for it all. I don't really have any criticisms of this story, especially since other comments have already made theirs, but in the...9 years (jesus christ) since this story was published I imagine there's been much improvement. Overall I think you did a good job of capturing the vibe of the original (without excessive philosophy), down to the text colors. (Though I noticed they aren't 100% exact accurate to the colors in the original. Deliberate choice or just couldn't get it perfect?).
If you're still lurking enough to see this comment, you have my gratitude
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My pleasure! Glad you enjoyed! And yeah, I couldn't get the colors 100% exact at the time I wrote this; honestly after working on this all summer back in 2014 I really just wanted to get it published and thus did the colors real quick on and off and with a few rewrites; I remember originally when I published I didn't even bother breaking it into chapters and there were a lot of amateur formatting and grammar mistakes notably with the transitioning from quotations back to prose. I fixed all that and gave it a tune-up in the weeks following and have pretty much left it as-is since.
Thanks for this.
Background Pony was, and is, a fantastic, enjoyable story that left me felling a bit disappointed when I reached the end. Now Lyra can finally just live her life. Just like anyone/pony should be able to.
11840004
Of course! Glad you enjoyed! <3
To be honest. I didn't fisnish Background Pony. I read several chapters, they were good, but dragged on. I read the last chapter to know if there was any payoff. There wasn't.
Then I think "maybe there is a fanfic of this fanfic". There was.
Thank you for writting this and giving me the payoff I needed. The cursed broken and my beloved Lyra can find peace.
11867983
This story really needs more attention. It should be advertised as medication for those who have endured Background Pony.