SwampShy

by Bootsy Slickmane

First and Last Day

Fluttershy stirred slightly in her bed, eyes slowly opening to greet the new day. A soft smile came to her as she caught sight of the rainbows cascading by just outside her window. Beyond the prismatic mist persisting outside was the western edge of Equestria. On a clear day such as this one, one could see all the way to the ocean through that window. The hotel staff had told her that this was one of the best rooms they had to offer, and she was quite inclined to agree. Every time she looked out that window, the view took her breath away. She was so glad she'd chosen Rainbow Falls as the place for her honeymoon.

Speaking of hotel staff, the door opened at that moment to let in a unicorn mare. A metal cart slid in behind her, the handle gripped in the blue aura of her magic. Atop the cart sat a tray containing two silver-domed dining plates and a nice selection of silverware. “Breakfast,” the unicorn said cheerfully.

Fluttershy sat up, pulling the covers up to her chest at the sudden entry. She calmed after seeing who it was, though. "Oh, uh, thank you." Fluttershy gave a tiny wave at the other mare as she walked out of the room, closing the door behind her. The pegasus sighed, turning to the lump lying in bed beside her. “Honey, breakfast is here.”

A dull grumbling came from under the blanket, and Fluttershy responded, "I know you like to sleep in, but we do have a lot to do today."

With a groan, the covers were pulled back. Swamp Thing sat up, blinking his beady eyes tiredly as he scanned the room. His gaze settled on the cart of food, and a bizarre gurgling sound came from his mouth.

"I'll go check." Fluttershy slid from the bed and trotted to the cart, lifting up one of the silver domes that covered their breakfast. "Looks like a Detrot Salad for me," she said, putting the dome aside and opening the second one. She grimaced, putting the plate cover back quickly. "And, um, minced rats for you, just like we ordered."

Swamp Thing removed himself from the bed as well, leaving green-stained sheets behind. He stomped over to the cart, swampy feet sticking to the carpet slightly, and picked up his plate. He tossed the lid away, grabbed up a handful of bloody rat chunks, and crammed them into his mouth. He hummed, smiling and nodding his head.

Fluttershy’s hooves flew to her mouth as he shoveled in another swampy handful. He made a few more gurgling sounds, rat blood leaking out of his mouth and down his chest, and her face started to turn as green as his. “Um,” she said, pausing to wretch, “don't you think that's enough, Swampy?”

Swamp Thing turned to her, one of his leafy brows raised. He looked over at the half-finished plate of rat bits, then down to his own prodigious girth. He reached down a hand, patting his gut as he gurgled thoughtfully.

Meanwhile, Fluttershy was heading for the door. "I think I'll just skip breakfast for now, if that's okay. I have to go take care of something. I'll be back in an hour, okay, honey?"

Swamp Thing made another noise, waving a vine-covered hand at her, and she disappeared through the doorway. He dropped his hand, looking back down at his belly. He had gained a bit of weight since they first started going out. Perhaps he should do something about that.

About a minute later, Swamp Thing stepped out into the hallway, a towel draped over his neck. He adjusted the sweat bands wrapped around his wrists and forehead before walking off down the hall.

Ten minutes and one journey around the whole hotel later, and he was completely lost. He wasn't even sure which floor he was on anymore. He puts his hands on his hips as he stood in an intersection, looking down each hall and trying to figure out where he was, when something caught his eye. A door opened a little ways down one corridor, and a white stallion was shoved out through it by a trio of variously-colored hooves. The stallion seemed to be in a daze as he adjusted his little red vest and rubbed a hoof against his hindquarters with wince, the door slamming shut beside him.

Coming to the conclusion that the stallion worked at the hotel, Swamp Thing jogged down the hallway toward him. He stopped a few feet from the stallion, gurgling at him unintelligibly.

"Hmm, what?" The stallion turned to face Swamp Thing. "Oh, right, you must be that swamp guy. How can I help you, sir?"

Swamp Thing gurgled at him again.

The hotel worked leaned forward a little. "I'm sorry, what?"

Swamp Thing gurgled some more, waving his arms about.

"Sorry, but I can't understand you, Mr. Thing."

Swamp Thing held up the towel. Then he pointed to his sweat bands. Then he started running in place.

"Oh, are you looking for the gym?"

Swampy stopped jogging and gurgled, nodding his head.

"It's on the first floor, right across from the lobby. You have to go through the pool room to get to it, though. A lot of people don't notice it there."

Swamp Thing made another noise and jogged off for the nearest staircase. He pushed open the stairwell door and quickly moved inside. He wasted no time in heading down the stairs, since he'd already wasted enough getting lost. Down to the first floor and out the door he went, jogging his way down the hall toward what he thought was the lobby.

Another five minutes of wandering finally brought him to the lobby. Green swamp sweat was already collecting on his forehead as he shoved his way into the pool room. He was greeted by the terrified cries of swimming fillies, but he paid them no mind. He was used to little ponies screaming in terror at the sight of him, after all. He grabbed onto the knob and swung open the door to the gym. It took him a moment to free his sticky swamp hand from the knob, but once he did, he turned to survey the room.

Exercise machines littered the floor. Wow, what a surprise. He moved over to the nearest open treadmill, slapping his towel down on the control panel as he stepped onto the old-fashioned rubber track. He stared vacuously at the array of big, brightly-colored buttons before him, unable to read Equestrian. He reached a finger up and tapped one. The machine beeped, making him jump slightly.

Growling quietly, he turned to watch another pony as they entered the room. The pale pink mare stepped onto a treadmill, pushed a couple of buttons, and the machine started up. He turned back to his own machine, imitating what the other pony had done. The treadmill started, pulling his feet away from the console. He took a few lumbering steps, looking over at the other pony again as she hit a button a few times and increased her pace. Swamp Thing knew he didn't have much time, so he poked like the wind, ramping up the speed.

Soon, he was at a jog, then a run. His eyes moved to the clock briefly, and he hit the button again. He only had about forty minutes before Fluttershy got back, so he had to make the most of his time. He hit the button again.

The rubbery track shuddered with each step he took, his sticky swamp feet pulling on it as he sprinted in place. Swamp sweat was pouring down from his body, sticking to everything it touched. His wheezing breaths grew more and more labored, a metallic taste building in his mouth. He leaned forward, gripping the control panel for support, his heart thumping in his ear holes.

The other mare he'd watched for guidance stopped her jogging session and stepped off her treadmill, only to freeze in place as she saw Swamp Thing running at full tilt, flinging green swamp sweat all over. She stared, mesmerized by the sight of him. "Hey, Golden," she said, "check this out."

Golden walked over, dabbing her forehead with a towel. "What is it, Holly?" The pink mare pointed at the swampy beast, and Golden said, "Oh, that's Swamp Thing. He lives in Ponyville. I'm pretty sure he's on vacation with Fluttershy, whom he married just yesterday. You wouldn't believe how they first met. You see—"

"No, no, that's not what I meant," Holly said. "Look at how fast he's going!" She raised herself up on the tips of her hooves, looking at the control panel he was leaning on. "And he's been going at it for almost an hour! That's crazy!"

Swamp Thing made an inquisitive gurgle and checked the clock. His gaze swept sideways, looking out into the lobby through the gym's tall windows. With near-perfect timing, Fluttershy stepped into the hotel, a little brown box tucked under one wing. She looked right, looked left, and then trotted off down a hallway.

Swamp Thing looked down at the controls, unsure of how to stop. He tried to reach for one of the buttons, but found his right hand wouldn't move. He tugged a little, but it was stuck in place. He tried the other, but that one wouldn't budge, either. Both his hands were glued to the console by his sticky swamp sweat. He turned to the watching pair of mares. He gurgled at them, and Holly tilted her head.

"What did he say?" Holly asked.

"I dunno," Golden replied, "I don't speak his language. I think Fluttershy is the only one who can understand him."

"Weird." Holly turned her head slightly, waving to another mare as she entered the pool room. She trotted to the door, pushing it open and calling out, "Hey, Derpy, come and check out how fast this guy is going!"

Swamp Thing turned back to the windows, swamp sweat continuing to pour down his body as though he were in a swamp shower. Fluttershy's tail slid just out of sight, no doubt headed to their shared suite. He groaned, wrenching his hands desperately against the console, but they stayed where they were. His legs burned beneath him, the constant strain becoming too much for his swampy muscles. He leaned his head back, spewing swamp saliva as he called for help, but nopony could understand his alien swamp gurgles.

A crowd began to form as he ran on, Holly leaning out and calling more ponies in to see how fast Swamp Thing could run. Minutes went by, and he turned to them, groaning at the crowd. They responded by cheering him on.

He turned back to console, banging his head against it in the hopes of stopping the infernal machine. Alas, it did nothing but give him a headache. The ponies around him began to chant his name.

Finally, he could take no more. With a gargled scream, his heart exploded in his chest, and he went limp. The rubber track ground into his swampy body, spraying swamp bits across the crowd of ponies, some of whom puked in response.

"Is he okay?" Golden asked.

Holly hopped over to the machine and pressed a hoof to emergency stop button, shutting the machine down. The green-stained track ground to a halt under the swampy corpse, and Holly reached a hoof down. "Hey, swamp guy, are you okay?"

No response.

"Uh oh…."

"Um, excuse me," came a soft voice from behind the crowd. Everypony turned to the yellow pegasus standing in the doorway. Fluttershy inquired, “Has anypony seen my husband? He's tall, green, and covered…” but she trailed off as the crowd parted to reveal the fallen swamp monster.

Fluttershy stepped through the clustered ponies in silence, stopping a few feet from the treadmill. "Swampy?" she whimpered, tears filling her eyes. She collapsed to her knees. "Swampy, no…."

She pulled the dead creature into a sticky embrace and wept. They'd had so little time together, and they'd never have any more. Never again would she find comfort in his swampy vines, wrapping around her as he gurgled that everything would be alright.

Because it wouldn't be. Not anymore.

Author's Note:

Blame Telaros. He's the one who suggested this (though he was probably joking).

Comments

[Telaros]

Want to buy prequel. I want to see more Swampshy.

[azednew]

Swamp Thing

[MIKEANTHONY321]

I think I just puked a little.

[Bootsy Slickmane]

4800580
Can't get enough swamp love, eh? Perhaps one day.

4801054
This is my new favorite comment. Congrats!

[Telaros]

4801071 Well, the two just make SENSE. Shame so many seem to take so much offense to this beautiful coupling here. Haters gonna hate, right?

EDIT: You credited that as artwork? You didn't have to credit me the coverart xD just didn't want it being empty is all. lol

EDIT2: Damn, Shy, looking closer I can see why you fell for fernmossman there. That chiseled oak chin is so manly. You broke a lot of bronies' hearts after choosing such green perfection.

[Samey90]

I had to check who was this guy. He'd really get on well with Fluttershy...

[Bootsy Slickmane]

4803586
Kinda seems like, it yeah.

[Magenta Cat]

I want to look away.
I want to just ignore this an leave it in peace.
I don't mean any harm or hard feelings on this fiction's author.
But I have to ask:
What was the meaning of this story? Why does this exists?
Look, I'm not gonna down vote this. Instead I will say it directly:
I didn't liked it.
Not because of the paring and not because of the random. Look I'm not against random fics, I actually enjoy them from once in a while. The same goes for pairing Sawmp Thing with Fluttershy. I'm okay with it.

I didn't liked it because it literally ignores everything about a character that deserves better. I'm not even a hard fan of the character but I know that something as big and long-lasting like the Swamp Thing deserves way more respect that the one showed here.

If the writer's intention was to disgust any comic book fan that happens to like or at least respect the Swamp Thing, mission accomplished, hope you feel proud for this.

[Bootsy Slickmane]

4827815
Ahh, that explains it. It seems I've accidentally become a troll. My apologies. I'm glad you decided to drop this comment here, because I was a little confused. Since you asked, allow me to explain why this story exists.

As the author note mentioned, I knew virtually nothing about Swamp Thing before writing this. It all began on a Skype chat with some friends of mine. It was jokingly suggested by a friend that someone should write about Swamp Thing being shipped with Fluttershy, and that he should die in a ridiculous manner. First, I suggested choking on a peanut, but then this idea came to me. I didn't even know what Swamp Thing was, and kinda got it mixed up with other swamp creatures. Anyway, months passed, and I got bored and decided to actually write this story, basically as a joke. I did some brief research about the character, then wrote this.

Obviously, yeah, pretty much everything presented here is off (though I wasn't able to find much on what he eats). Apparently, Swamp Thing can't actually die as long as there is vegetable matter somewhere in the universe, even it's its dried tobacco. And, sometimes, he can actually speak. And he probably doesn't sweat. Yes, I knowingly threw all of that out the window for the sake of the story. An in-universe explanation? Equestria clearly has different physical laws than our universe does (the moon itself brings about night), so I don't think it's too much of a stretch to say that Swamp Thing's powers might not work properly. Even if they did in the comics, I'm just gonna say that it would be kinda absurd (like this story in general). Also, written Equestrian only vaguely resembles English, so it may actually a different language that's just being spoken to us as English for convenience, and Swamp Thing might not know the language.

I mean no real offense to comic book fans, but I've never had much respect for old comics because they never seem to make much sense. It's like nobody cared about plot holes, or gaps in logic. Maybe I'm just not looking hard enough, but so many plotlines and powers I've seen seemed just plain ridiculous (and this is coming from a guy who came up with a superpowers like "Fart Factory" and "Oatmeal-kinesis"). So no, I don't like old comics, but I didn't intend to offend anyone with this work of fiction. I wasn't trying to send a message or anything. It was just a borderline-retarded story that made liberal use of the Random tag, written mostly as a gift for a friend. I'm sorry if this bothered you, and feel free to downvote it.

If I do actually write a prequel for this that explores how they met and grew to love one another, I promise to treat the character with more respect, and actually go about explaining how his powers interact with the magic in Equestria. It'll still be a crack fic, but I should at least do right by the character. Can't do anything to this story without completely destroying it, though.

As pride goes, I actually have a little for this. If someone ever comes up to me and asks, "Are you the idiot who wrote SwampShy?" I'll strike a Superman-esque pose and reply, "Damn right I am." But I'm a touch insane.

[Magenta Cat]

Oh man, unknowingly you just followed Len Wein's exact steps when he created the character.

It's good to see that you weren't trying to troll anyone. Although you could put a disclaimer in the description.

I'm not asking for a rewrite or an expansion, and I support your decision of no changing the story. But if you ever try to write Swamp Thing again, please don't be afraid to ask. The guys on both, the DC, DC/Marvel and Crossover groups are very willing to help.

And when I said I hoped you felt proud, it wasn't sarcasm. Everybody should be proud of their work, regardless of said work's reception. If you put a real effort on something you can be proud of it, like this guy:
i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/777/872/e6c.gif

[Bootsy Slickmane]

4829957
A disclaimer might be a good idea, yeah. And I'll keep that in mind if I need some help researching the character.

[G-AB Acid]

Exercise machines littered the floor. Wow, what a surprise.

I fuckin' love you, man!