At the end of the world, Princess Twilight Sparkle is hidden away in order to survive. All that she has to keep herself sane is a single old computer-turned-journal, and she has no intention of giving in to madness just yet.
Thanks to NaarPuni for the cover art! (DeviantArt Link)
Now has a dramatic reading thanks to ObabScribbler!
Now has continuations: Fade and Falter
Warnings for apocalypse scenarios and strange grammatical choices.
This was written in about an hour for a myriad of reasons, including a want to actually get some writing done, a personal goal of trying to write a short story in about 1,000 words, and for fun.
This story has received some major edits as of April 22, including beefing up the content of several logs, adding some new logs, and other alterations throughout the story, both plot-wise and grammatical.
Well, if that ain't the most creepy, disconcerting way to end a story, I dunno what is.
Man, you done good here. It's not quite a full descent into madness yet, but the way it leaves off, I certainly seems like she's on the way out.
Nice touches with the strikes and hyphens. Adds to the creepy factor. Now I just have to wonder what happened.
Good read. Have a thumb
I like how you ended it, halfway through a sentence, indicating she disappeared too leaving an empty world behind.
April 13th, 2014
Apparently I'm following this author, no idea who he is honestly, might be losing it... found his story in my feed... I gave his story a read.
It was a good read... kinda depressing though, like most post apocalyptic tales I suppose, but good nonetheless.
Will give this mystery authors other story a read, Gilgamesh was a bro, can't be too bad if he's in it.
Signed,
Pyro The Faithful Reader
wow.....
...........
TAKE THEM ALL!
Creepy story is creepy...but well executed!
Fall Of An Empire - Omega
Faved. Just because of the ending.
This needs the best cover art to match the splendorous writing that is this story. Beautiful ending. Bravo.
A well-deserved like and favorite
Soo....................is there at least an idea of what was making them disappear? Best theory I've got is that the Producers decided to scrap the show and that caused them to fade into nothing, well most parts of the show anyways.
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Wow… thank you all so much for this! I honestly was not expecting there to be so much positivity over a story I literally wrote on a whim and a want to create something unnerving. I'm glad you all enjoyed it, and thank you all for the support!
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If you want my honest opinion, even I don't know exactly why the creatures are all disappearing. Part of my enjoyment in writing this was the ambiguity of the ending and scenario, so there is no set reason for why they have all vanished. Or even if they've vanished at all...
4233433 Huh. I suppose that does build up quite the suspense doesn't it? I suppose, also, that we'll have to stick with reasons inside our own heads, might even be more fun that anyways.
I don't care if this was written in an hour, I want more.
Well deserved.
*No guarantees, as this group gets plenty of recommendations, but it's worth a shot! I hope you hit pay-dirt!*
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Thank you again for putting in the time to recommend this story!
Awsome story, its fun imagining what is going to happen next
Oh wait did the sudden stop mean that Twilight disappeared too?
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You're quite welcome! I am happy to do it!
Is Twilight gone? Can you please please please please please please please please please please please please please please make a sequel or continuation?
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A small part of me wants to write more of this -- or, at the very least, more short stories like this one -- but I don't think it would really work with the overall story. The point of the ending is to be ambiguous, so that anyone reading it will come up with their own ending. Did Twilight disappear? Did the journal just break down after so long? Was it all just an elaborate prank by Celestia that will no doubt cost thousands of bits in therapy bills? Who can say? Like I said, I don't think I can continue this story without destroying that ambiguity and suspense that the end creates. So I'm sorry, but I doubt that I'll be writing a continuation or a sequel any time soon, if ever.
A few things about this bothered me (since when is "a journal" a device with a screen and a keyboard? I've never seen anything like that in Equstria, they use books) and the description of the disappearances not being noticed until very late rang wrong to me. A pattern of disappearances is going to get noticed fairly quickly by the authorities, at least, even if the general public doesn't realize what's going on right away.
On the other hand, those are small quibbles, and the mood of this is excellent. The slow decay of the keyboard running parallel to the decay of Twilight's mind can probably buy you a pass for the out of place technology (I just don't get why she calls it an old journal. Old journals in particular are books...)
And the ambiguous ending is way more scary than anything you could have said. It lets the reader come up with all kinds of scary possibilities. (My best/worst theory: Twilight herself was causing the disappearances, and the bit where she says Celestia has locked her in is the actual truth and not a delusion. The parts where she claims it's for her safety are the delusions.)
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I looked back over it, and changed a couple of words around to make more sense with the "journal." I honestly see it as more of an old computer which only has a typing interface and some basic functions (the strike-throughs, for example). The big question is "Why is there a computer in what is basically a dungeon?" Then again, it's likely that Twilight wasn't the first pony to go down there, and given that computers have been seen on the show before...
But wow, thank you for commenting, and for the positive feedback! I really appreciate it, and I'm glad that you enjoyed the story in spite of its flaws!
4273956 Awww. Okay then
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That's not to say that I won't be working in this universe again, of course. Who knows? If I get some good ideas, I may come back to write more stories like this one in the future. We'll just have to wait and see.
4279354 YAYYY!
Fucking beautiful. You get a like and favourite from me.
Not bad.
Not the most original thing I've ever read (pardon me for being so blunt), but entertaining nonetheless. That, and I adore dark stuff...
Have a like and fave!
Much improved. Have a ribbon:
i.imgur.com/6MrWqNZ.png
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Thank you! I'm glad I was able to make it more enjoyable, and thank you again for your original advice!
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You're very welcome
Hope the continuations shed some light on what is happening.
This was rather good.
So Twi just vanishes while she is typing... that's dark...
Still a good read though
HI there. I hope you don't mind, but I liked this fic so much I've put together an audio version on YouTube:
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Holy crap, thank you so much for this! I apologize if I'm about to go into a bit of a rant here, but seriously, this reading is absolutely incredible. When I first wrote this story, I never thought it'd get something like this. Hell, I wrote it just because I was having trouble motivating myself to work on my only other project at the time, and I needed something spontaneous. (When I wrote it, I had only a vague idea of the story planned out, but I already knew I wanted to use that ending.)
But this… seriously, I'm not sure what I can really say beyond thanking you profusely. The amount of work and effort that went into making this reading is positively amazing. I'm very proud with how far this story has gone, even if it was something so simple originally, and I'm extremely thankful to you and everyone else who worked on this reading. Seriously, you're incredible.
listened to scribbler's reading and... phew. boy howdy. Grim, yet i can still like it, aside from the fact that it means celestia made twilight go through all that stress to protect her, when it did nothing in the end and twilight could've been spending her final days with her friends and family.
Still liked this though, and looking forward to when scribbler releases her readings of the other two parts.
Forcing myself not to read them to avoid spoilers
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You're very welcome. I had a lot of fun reading it. ;)
Hey, I wrote a review for the three fics in this continuity. In case you are interested, they can be found here.
I just like it. Great job
This song by myuu sums this story up perfectly
Imagine if it was just a bad dream, and "disappearing" was just waking up.
Am I the only one who thought that she that both the computer breaking and her disappearing are possable
Will we ever know where they go to?