• Published 30th Mar 2012
  • 2,516 Views, 36 Comments

Bonfire - Diceman



BonBon candy experiment goes horribly wrong

  • ...
9
 36
 2,516
This story has been marked as having adult content. Please click below to confirm you are of legal age to view adult material in your country.

Confirm
Comments ( 31 )

Hope yall don't judge me to hard on my first try at fic writing.:derpytongue2:

LOVED IT! :pinkiehappy:

Well , at least a few liked it. I'm planning a follow up to this but kinds short on ideas. Twifire maybe?:rainbowhuh:

skipped though it still liked it

A slow start, and I saw the word "arm" in there, but a good end.

387700

yeah I kinda did a all nighter on that one. Dyslexia started seriously kicking in from 5-9k words area and editing was a nightmare in a half. Still not bad for no pre-readers or editors.

390613

Thank you. The follow up is on its way ^^:pinkiehappy:

390917You welcome and okay.:eeyup:

394546

Suggest improvements if you would please? :rainbowhuh:

What did applebloom do!?!

396729

reread that part, the page number changed when it was taken away from her. :pinkiehappy:

420110

Glad you enjoyed it :pinkiehappy: hope you enjoy my next fic which is based on this but with Soarin/Dash

Dude, you oughta write a bonus chapter for this story. A chapter that tells us what happens between Twilight and Spitfire.

447201

I thought about it but "Soaring hearts" is awaiting approval which contains RD/Soarin/lyra/spitfire orgy. Its kinda long at 17kish words but it is the follow up to this. Lets just leave Twifire / firesparkle to the imagination eh?

ps: don't forget to follow or ya might miss the follow up :p

Huh, that's too bad. Oh well, the images of Twilight and Spitfire are MUCH better when you leave it to the imagination. There's no limits.

CLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOPCLOP
:rainbowwild::rainbowwild::rainbowwild::rainbowwild::rainbowwild::rainbowwild::rainbowwild::rainbowwild::rainbowwild::rainbowwild::rainbowwild::rainbowwild::rainbowwild:

Here was me before I read this chapter: :eeyup:
Now here is me through the hole in the wall: :moustache:

447215

I took your request to heart, SpitSparkle is on its way :p

I vote for more SparkleFire.
We need more of that shipping NOW!

464000

It's on the way. It's about 3/4 done atm

Good for your first fic. Dialogue seems a little dry and sometimes corny. Also it makes it easier for the reader if you give each segment of dialogue it's own line. Anyways, this is definitely better than most people's first fics, keep it up.
Also, love the pairing choice

Makes the first two chapters completely useless to be honest. Cut those out and you have a nice clopfic. :rainbowkiss:

The newborn chilver had fur of silver.

(A chilver is a female lamb.)

1086760

Huh didn't think of either of those. Is chilver another language or old english?

1088127

Regular English, just rare.

Amusingly, you can actually justify Zecora knowing both: A sporange is part of a fern's reproductive systems, thus something she would know about. Meanwhile, in Equestria it would be likely for many people to know the various terms for ungulates of given species, age and sex.

That was pretty awesome.

I enjoyed this!
Good, logical set up, funny, easy to believe story. Great for 4 hours of work, bro!
If you plan on writing more clops, this obviously has TONS of room to expand on (friendly reminder).

A question for other readers, does anyone else imagine these scenes with humanized characters? or at least anthro?

384097
Twifire = Sails Forever.

Login or register to comment