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  • E Shotgun Wedding

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  • E The Stolen Date

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  • E Temptation

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Blog Posts101

  • Monday
    Everything is fine

    The crime rate in the United States, and indeed, most of the developed world has been plummeting since the early 1990s, with a 50%+ decline across the board, from property crime to murder.

    Globally, the rate of death from infectious disease has plummeted over time; the present-day Ebola outbreak in West Africa has killed about a fifth as many people as die of the flu in the United States alone every year.

    The number of deaths in wars worldwide have been falling dramatically; even since the 1980s, the per capita death rate from war has declined by over 90%.

    People are living longer, healthier lives than ever before, and we are growing increasingly wealthy, both as individuals and as people on the whole; the global GDP has continued to rise, and every one of us has within our home a computer which acts as a television, typewriter, telephone, radio, encyclopedia, library, reference manual, and numerous things which simply didn't exist or were accessible in the past. A computer today is faster and more useful than the best supercomputers in the world 20 years ago, and you carry around in your pocket a device which has more computing power than entire rooms full of millions of dollars worth of equipment did in the 1960s.

    Not thirty years ago, sodomy was illegal in much of the world; today, gay marriage is legal in 15 countries and in over half of the United States, and will likely be legal everywhere here soon.

    So when you hear about how awful the world is, remember: it was much worse 20 years ago than it is today. And it will probably be much better than it is today 20 years from now.

    Things may not be perfect, but no matter how much the world may seem to be closing in around you according to the news, remember: on the whole, everything is fine, and getting better.

    19 comments · 108 views
  • Saturday
    TD writes a Koan

    One semi-tradition in the Writeoff Association is to do silly little "story remixes", where someone combines the title of two stories in the contest and posits some silly story which is a combination of the two stories whose titles were combined.

    As a result of this, I ended up writing a koan, which is a traditional story which is meant to have the student discard their illusions about reality as a result of hearing the tale, and thereby coming closer to enlightenment. It also happens to be a drabble, which is a story which is exactly 100 words long, though, alas, FIMFiction disagrees and claims it is 112.

    I have added the story to my short story collection; it is called The Wrong Answer. I hope you enjoy it.

    1 comments · 35 views
  • Thursday
    Patterns and Memory

    13 comments · 127 views
  • 1w, 1d
    Write-Off Reviews - Just Over The Horizon

    2 comments · 79 views
  • 1w, 3d
    Review and Discuss: Ardensfax's Under The Aurora

    4 comments · 97 views
  • ...
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Maud Pie has written thousands of poems.

Here are some of her poems.

They're about rocks.

First Published
17th Mar 2014
Last Modified
17th Mar 2014
#1 · 31w, 18h ago · 1 · · Geology ·

Love it.:pinkiehappy:

#2 · 31w, 18h ago · · 2 · Geology ·

How hilarious! I need to give this to my science teacher for extra credit :eeyup:

#3 · 31w, 18h ago · 11 · · A Rock in Dirt ·

Deep, man

#4 · 31w, 18h ago · 7 · · Halite ·

I love these things. They rock

#5 · 31w, 17h ago · 16 · · Boulder ·

D'awwww! :pinkiehappy:

#6 · 31w, 17h ago · 10 · · Quartz ·

Or when in a muffin basket, apparently.  I'll bet quartz was the decor on Rarity's godawful hat.:raritydespair:

#7 · 31w, 17h ago · 19 · · Farming Rocks ·

Pink rocks, right? :pinkiesad2:

#8 · 31w, 17h ago · 1 · · Geology ·

beautifull :fluttercry:

#9 · 31w, 17h ago · 14 · · Geology ·

This poetry is totally underground.

It is also on top of the ground,

And sometimes is the ground.

Poetry of the ground,

It rocks.

#10 · 31w, 17h ago · 1 · · Farming Rocks ·

>>4095801 Of course. :heart:

#11 · 31w, 17h ago · · · Geology ·

I shall never take you for granite, Titanium.

take my like.

#12 · 31w, 17h ago · 19 · · Farming Rocks ·

Reading rock poems for a laugh.

I laughed, reading rock poems.

Until I read this one.

Then there were surprise feels.

This poem was not about rocks.

#13 · 31w, 17h ago · 3 · · Geology ·

These are:

     Absolutely grand.

                Mike

#14 · 31w, 17h ago · · · Smooth Rocks ·

Hmm, this one actually reads nicely for a poem. I dig it!

#15 · 31w, 16h ago · · · Farming Rocks ·

Rocks. 2edgy4me. Especially this one.

#16 · 31w, 16h ago · 5 · · Geology ·

This has been oddly addictive and like eating a chip, you can't just read one.

Shame there wasn't a poem about obsidian lava rock (aka the sharp shiny black rock that Aztec weapons were made from), obsidian is awesome.

#17 · 31w, 16h ago · 8 · · Smooth Rocks ·

Okay, now I'm reading them aloud in Maud's voice...

#18 · 31w, 15h ago · 13 · · Boulder ·

That's cute... :heart:

#19 · 31w, 15h ago · 1 · · Farming Rocks ·

This poem.  So many feels.

#20 · 31w, 15h ago · · · Farming Rocks ·

This one is my favourite :pinkiesad2:

#21 · 31w, 15h ago · 1 · · Geology ·

Those were all spectacular. :pinkiehappy:

I especially liked "Sand" and "Understanding Rocks" :twilightsmile:

Very entertaining, insightful, and heart wrenching. :pinkiesad2:

Looking forward to more. I also wrote a few poems about rocks. I'd be delighted if you were to check them out. :scootangel:

#22 · 31w, 15h ago · 21 · · Granite ·

Don't take it for granite!

I'll see myself out.

#23 · 31w, 15h ago · 1 · · Rock Music ·

Truer words were never written. :rainbowlaugh:

#24 · 31w, 15h ago · · · Land ·

The best one yet:pinkiesmile:

#25 · 31w, 15h ago · 1 · · Farming Rocks ·

:pinkiesad2::pinkiehappy:

#26 · 31w, 15h ago · 2 · · Farming Rocks ·

Best one, definitely the best one. :pinkiesad2:

#27 · 31w, 15h ago · 6 · · Metamorphic Rock ·

Didn't Pinkie metamorphosisize, in a way?

#28 · 31w, 15h ago · 4 · · Farming Rocks ·

Families.

#29 · 31w, 15h ago · 1 · · Sand ·

da meaning....

#30 · 31w, 15h ago · 1 · · Geology ·

Brilliant! All of them! Number fourteen (can't remember the title) was the best. The first couple made me laugh, but the fourteenth one made me think and gave me feels.

#31 · 31w, 14h ago · · · Rock Music ·

This was an especially brilliant one. :pinkiehappy:

#32 · 31w, 14h ago · 1 · · Geology ·

This reminds me quite a bit of "Alberto Caeiro", one of the personas of the portuguese poet Fernando Pessoa. A bunch were surprisingly good and insightful, but even the others had a very unique and interesting flow.

#33 · 31w, 14h ago · · · Farming Rocks ·

This was genuinely sweet.

#34 · 31w, 14h ago · 2 · · Land ·

For a moment I thought this was a Minecraft reference.

#35 · 31w, 14h ago · · · Geology ·

This is good. Have a thumbs up and a fav.

#36 · 31w, 14h ago · 9 · · Rock Music ·

Heavy metal is loud

They should have called it rock.

Bu metals are not rocks

So they shouldn't call it rock.

#38 · 31w, 13h ago · · 1 · Geology ·

i like rocks and some one shuld make a poetry about rock music and a song a bout rocks. i made a poem about rocks

Rocks are rocks

They rock

Like a rock

They're a rock

I like rocks.

:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:

#39 · 31w, 13h ago · · · Farming Rocks ·

I teared up a bit. So sweet.

#40 · 31w, 13h ago · 7 · · Understanding Rocks ·

This is so deep it's practically bedrock.

#42 · 31w, 13h ago · 3 · · Soil (Experimental Poem) ·

This one is my favorite. That Author's Note... :rainbowlaugh: TD, you're the best.

#43 · 31w, 13h ago · 7 · · Granite ·

"Thank you granite." was a simple stroke of genius.

#44 · 31w, 13h ago · · · Geology ·

I enjoyed these poems.

#45 · 31w, 13h ago · 3 · · Geology ·

Here I was, reading through these and laughing along... I was not ready for #14.

Very nice collection--very Maud-esque.  It made for a nice Monday follow-up to the episode!

#46 · 31w, 12h ago · 3 · · If Rocks Could Talk ·

*Snaps fingers*

End.

#47 · 31w, 8h ago · 7 · · Soil (Experimental Poem) ·

Holy shit! I did not know soil was made of rocks.

Rocks that have died, decayed and turned to something new.

More experiments should be made, Maude- err, TD. There is constant life from the death of a rock, and more life from the death of the soil... a cycle, eternal.

Wait... rock>soil>mud

Mud=Maud?

Maud=rock?

#48 · 31w, 8h ago · 11 · · Farming Rocks ·

This is my favorite poem

but

it isn't really about rocks, is it?

#49 · 31w, 8h ago · 19 · · Boulder ·

Not gonna lie, got this idea from another Maud story, but isn't it possible that Boulder once could have been a boulder?

A boulder gets shoved around as the earth shifts, knocking chunks of it off until it eventually lands in a river, where it lands in a river with a great ker-splash! over time, the river manages, with great effort and much flooding at where its banks were once narrow, to roll the boulder off into a waterfall. The boulder lands at the base of the waterfall, where it lands at it's base, splashing water everywhere.

The boulder stays at the bottom of the waterfall for a long time, constantly pelted with water and heavier debris, like other apathetic rocks who have slowly drifted down the river to cause their own eras of mass flooding. Over time, the boulder is scratched at and worn down into a small pebble until it's half the size of a hoof.

Eventually, the half-hoof-sized rock floats down the rest of the river to a bank, where it's constantly eroded and eaten further. After another eternity (although not as long as the previous), it gets lodged in the muddy banks of a calm fork in the river, buried deep in it.

Another eternity later, that mud is dug up and hauled to the Pie rock farm, where it is found much later by a small grey filly who was digging in the dry, chaffing dirt. She sniffs and observes the small abrasions and scratches, each one telling a story of the pebble's life. A dim spark of interest lights up in the filly's head.

With not an upturn of the corners of her eyes or mouth, nor even the sound of a girly squeal of excitement, she takes up the pebble in her mouth with all the grace of a grazing rhino and trudges to her room calmly.

Inside, her heart is beating a bajillion miles per hour, excitement and happiness soaking her over her and over.

She sets the pebble on the table in her room "I'm going to name you boulder."  There is the slightest raising of pitch from her normally gravel-like voice as she smiles for the briefest of moments.

Inside, her heart's still pounding with joy.

#50 · 31w, 8h ago · 1 · · Quartz ·

>>4095793

Yet it yielded a lot of nutritional value, I guess.

What was once art is now food. Maximum value, those clothes made from fruit leather be damned.

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