Suds
"Of all the trans-matter markets in all the world, you walk into mine."
With a sigh, I glance aside at him. "I swear, Aynrandy, are you stalking me?"
He smirks from the other side of the aisle. "Now that wouldn't make me a very good gentleman." He twirls a scan card between his fingers while easy listening music warbles through the speakers of the store overhead. "It's a small Sprawl, sweetheart. What's got you into a shopping mood?"
"Believe it or not, I've got a stomach, neighbor."
"Hey heyyyyy... just a question. No reason to go Jeffrey Dahmer the Second on me."
"Oh please." I roll my eyes and chuckle. "The clone was nothing like the source."
"Yeah, well, his pop songs made me wanna execute him all the same." Ayrandy points across the store. "Oatmeal is in the section thattaways."
"I'm not shopping for oatmeal," I say, grasping one card after another off the rungs of the shelf in front of me. "It's Internet dinners for me, thank you very much."
"Don't you have a pony to feed?"
"Ayn, we've been through this." I glance up at him. "According to the rules of the contract, I'm not allowed to feed her anything from this plane. I mean... until some further research is done, who's to tell what kind of horrible side effects she might endure?"
"You've gotta be shitting me."
"Hell, no. You think she's some kind of test subject? She's got as many rights as you or me."
"Pffft! What's the Testing Council so afraid of? Montezuma's Revenge on an omniversal scale?"
"Something like that. I'm sure."
"I still don't see why—like—you can't at least feed her an apple or something."
I giggle. Then I giggle again.
Aynrandy raises his eyebrow. "What's so funny, buddy?"
"Believe me, Ayn..." I take a handful of cards and walk over to the processing wall. "Where she comes from, she's got her fill of apples."
"I bet she's got stories to tell." Ayn shuffles behind me. "Hell, maybe I can come over and she can tell me herself!"
"Damn, if you aren't persistent." I slip the first of many cards into a slot beside a translucent screen.
"Just because I want one really bad!"
"What, an apple?"
"A pony, you Zoram-damned nincompluto!" He chuckles. "You practically radiate with happiness as of late. If I could somehow get half-as-much cheer in my life..."
"Ayn, it's not just about being happy," I say. With tired eyes, I watch through the screen as a series of metallic arms lower down with pinpoint lasers and ribbon a frozen package into existence from the outside in. "It's about bridging communication from our plane to theirs. It's about sharing knowledge and prosperity and extending a hand of peace and comfort and—"
"Soooooo... what you're saying is—"
"Nnnngh..." My head slaps against the processing console "Okay, so maybe it is all about happiness."
"Ha! See what I'm getting at? And you know what? I totally get it! Since day one when they announced testing!" He tosses his card up and curls his wrist around to catch it oddly behind his back. "That's why I just recently threw my hat into the mix!"
I blink, then turn to squint at him. "What do you mean?"
"Haven't you heard, pal? They're initiating a second wave of testers. No doubt based on the data you've given them. Version 0.035 is what they're calling this line of articles! And apparently there's gonna be at least two dozen transfers! Talk about good odds, huh?"
My lips purse. I stare into the hazy bright glow of the shop. "Is... is it all within the company?"
"Pfft. Please. Like the Viking could afford that big a piece of the pie. Nah, this is for the whole network. Apparently there's a huge contract signed with the big cybercheese at the top. If this thing hits it off, it could mean an enormous financial boom for the entire moon!"
"Huh..."
"Finally, we can have something to rub in Io's uptight faces and..." Aynrandy pauses to blink at me. "Hey. What's the matter?"
"What? Oh... uhm... nothing..."
He smiles gently. "Awwwwww. Don't look so sad! What, did you think that you and your pony were going to be the sole pioneers forever?"
"Well..." I sigh towards the processor. "Kinda..."
He places his hand on my shoulder and gives it a loving squeeze. "Nothing about this makes your little friendship any less special, ya hear? I mean—think about it—what this really means is that your cantering gal pal can maybe bring her friends over to see the sights and sounds of this place too! Wouldn't that be smexy?"
"Yeah..." I smile faintly as the food package finishes processing with a ding! "I guess so..."
"Well, I know so!" Aynrandy gives my shoulder a final squeeze and backs up, waving "laser guns" with his pointed fingers. "And just you wait! One of these days, I'm gonna out-cute you at twenty paces!"
"You've got quite the deficit to make up!"
"Ow! Owwwwwww! You wound me!"
"Heh... see you tomorrow morning."
"Wouldn't miss the hoverbus for anything in the world!"
He leaves, and I grab my food and put it in a carrying case. After a few more cardswipes, I collect all of my groceries, pay with digital beijings, and shuffle my way home. It's a long and lurching stride that takes me back to my apartment. I'm no longer hungry, and the weight of the food in my container almost anchors me to the ground.
My mind flickers back to the first day, when I was summoned to the office and greeted by one of the project's lab technicians. I remember feeling very awkward, nervous, and even a bit scared. All of that changed weeks later, when the last of several messages were transferred beyond the rift, and the article was used to its full potential for the first time. She appeared in a flash of golden light. There were no less than twenty scientists in the chamber, and yet somehow—I swear to this day—the first and only person she smiled at was me.
Since then, I must admit, I've felt something. All my life, I believed that I was just one among billions on this moon. The labor and grind of my work had only magnified that sensation in recent years. But recently, when I see her innocent face, hear her guffawing laugh, or feel her sleeping smallness in my embrace—I feel like I'm just one soul in the universe, and she's a soul from another. And it's unlike anything I've ever been a part of before. And the reason for that, I feel, is because—for better or for worse—we are two of a kind, and very blessed and lucky to be so.
But now, that fortune and luck is spreading. I suppose I've always known this, just as I've known that good things—even the best of things—can't last forever. I've never really given it much consideration, to be honest. It's not that I've had no reason to, it's just that I'm so damn distracted with being happy to contemplate feeling sad. Especially lately. Maybe that's what my existence has long needed. I wonder if it's the same for her.
Nahhh...
That's a stupid thought.
She comes from a land of Galloping Galas and birthday celebrations and Winter Wrap-Ups. What more could she possibly want than what she already has?
And suddenly, I'm at the door to my apartment. I wonder if Aynrandy's gotten back yet next door, or if he's still bouncing around from street to street, bragging to everyone in the Sprawl about an opportunity he only thinks he's gotten.
Ew... is that jealousy rumbling in my stomach? Yuck. I gotta get inside. I gotta...
As soon as the door opens to my holo-key, my face is assaulted by a throng of bubbles. I double-back, blinking, then stroll briskly into my apartment... where I find more bubbles... and more and more and more.
They're all emanating from the kitchen. The scent of soap tickles my nose. Naturally, I head towards it.
"Wait! J-just wait for one cotton-pickin' second!" A series of tiny hooves pitter-patter across the carpet. Applejack skids to a stop in my shadow. She's panting, and I see that her hoodie is thoroughly damp in several places. "Okay, now y'all have every reason to be mad at me. And I dun rightly bl-blame ya. If I c-came home to somethin' like this, I'd be plum ticked-off too! But first just allow me to explain with the honest-to-Celestia truth."
"Uhhhh... Applejack?" I slowly place down the bag of foodstuffs and squint towards the far end of my apartment. "Why's there a bubble bath in my kitchen?"
"So I woke up with this comfy blanket spread all over me, not to mention this here hoodie was bein' charged to full juice n'all. So I figured you had done somethin' nice instead of botherin' to wake me up from my nap. I wanted to return the favor, and so I thought 'Shucks, I bet that there washin' machine hasn't been scrubbed in forever!' So I fetched me some soap and a few gallons of water from the fancy spicket in yer kitchen and... erm... well..."
I'm already walking into the next room. I have to brace myself against the walls or else my feet will instantly slide across the tile floor. Right now, I'm gawking at a winter wonderland of soap suds and frothy bubbles.
I hear her voice behind me, and the drawl has mutated into a stretched whimper. "Ohhhh shoot. I've done messed up big time, haven't I? I swear, when I clean up around the house at home, nothin' like this ever happens!"
I can't help it. This is a marvel of freakystance. I simply stand here, gawking at the sea of bubbles as it actually spreads. "It's a sonic washer, Applejack," I stammer like a sentry of Jupiter. "You're not supposed to get water or soap within a mile of it."
"And I figured that out! Problem is, I figured it too late." I hear a shuddering sound. I turn to see her grasping an invisible hat to lower it to her chest. "Land's sakes, if I dun feel like a clumsy little dragon whelp havin' messed up a simple task real bad." She sniffles. "I know yer mad. It's alright to be mad." Those green eyes turn misty for the first time since I've seen them. "If... if it'll make thangs any better, I'll... uh... I-I'll just leave..."
Suddenly, she gasps. It may have something to do with having been scooped up in my arms.
"Applejack, there is no way in all of Ganymede that I could be mad with you," I say, holding her close and running a hand through her mane. "Do you hear me?"
She sniffles again, biting her lip. "You mean... you ain't mad?"
I smile. "Not even remotely. Besides..." I glance aside and suppress a giggle, failing. "This—heehee—is pretty damn funny."
Applejack gulps, wipes her cheek, and gives a freckled smile as she lies with curled hooves in my arms. "It's almost... almost l-like I let loose a wild herd of windigos in yer kitchen, huh?"
"Heh heh heh heh... hehhhhhh..." I sigh through a drunken smile. "I have no friggin' clue what that means."
"For real? Well, then me either!"
"Liar."
"No, honest—" Applejack's eyes cross as she's suddenly the recipient of tickling fingers against her hooves. "Aaack! Tarnation! Quit it, you!"
"Liar, liar, saddle on fire!"
"But I don't—haah haah—wear a—hee hee—saddddle!"
"Well, you certainly don't wear a halo."
"Awwwww... now yer just bein' cruel."
"Hee hee hee..."
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Uh oh. I know I've heard that somewhere before...
brutalgamer.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/deadspace23view1.jpg
Okay... now I'm getting a sinking feeling about the hoodie situation...
4396754
"EVERYONE GET OUT OF THE SPRAWL BEFORE IT'S...."
"RRRRRRROOOOOOAARRRRR.....!"
"Oh. Fuck."
Oh Applejack...
oh screw you for taken a pot shot at Spike
More cuteness in the form of washer antics. Nice
How does a sonic dishwasher work anyway? You stick a dish in and it uses vibrations to scrub somehow without shattering a dish?
4397245
it runs off of WUBS! WUB WUB WUB WUB WUB WUB
I hope that those hoodies are water-proof.
Also, the fact that their currency is beijings seems almost prophetic.
4397245
Actually, yes. They've experimented with the tech before. Basically vibrates all the food particles off and leaves the dish pristine. Supposedly.
4397912 Of course to make it a viable product, the plates need to not be weakened.....and it needs to not strip your skin off if you accidentally touch it
4396754
Well hopefully it's a re-built sprawl. or an alternate universe where they never found the markers.
INCOMING FLUTTERSHY PREDICTED!
AW YEAH!
We're Ganymede or Europa or Callisto or a small moon, then.
4397368
THEY SAID I COULDN'T MAKE A DISHWASHER THAT COULD CLEAN DISHES WITH WUBS
AND I SAID "SCREW THAT I'M VINYL SCRATCH!"
4426765 I think it is more like the sonic screwdriver
4460254 The agreeing of whovians has commenced
This fic has officially earned the title of "Jackabetes-inducing".
Have some cute AJ.
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4396754 Really? Huh, my first thought was Neuromancer.
4513200 Cute? She looks hung over.
No, wait, that IS cute.
4705655
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Suds~ AJ needs to learn how to future 8'D
Heheheh. nice job!
And here I thought we'd be 3d printing our hamburgers or at least having groceries dropped off by drones in the future. Nope, just a massive interplanetary supermarket.
6286468 Well, to be fair, it seems to be a supermarket that 3-D prints the food. Unless that was a he author editing a variation of your idea in?