Chapter 85 - Reexamine
One moment, Trixie was having a nice time playing with Dinky, keeping the foal entertained while she waited her turn in the waiting room. The next found Derpy and Trixie exchanging a few innocent words, only for Derpy to panickingly grab the filly and take off. In her haste, Derpy had nearly knocked Trixie off of her hooves.
She tried to go over what she’d said to Derpy to upset her so much, but it didn’t make sense. All she spoke about to Derpy was the muffin, and she had left that behind. Though it was possible she left it behind because Derpy thought Trixie wanted it. Derpy couldn't have thought Trixie was trying to rob her, could she?
Looking down at the muffin in her hooves, Trixie felt her chest ache. She had just tried to be nice to Dinky and Derpy, but it somehow backfired again. Why is it so difficult? Trixie didn’t even do anything wrong this time.
“Trixie?” Nurse Red called out, drawing Trixie out of her thoughts.
She had almost forgotten the nurse was there. “Huh, yes?” Trixie blinked slowly, then raised her gaze up from the muffin to Nurse Redheart. To Trixie’s surpise, there was a very dark look on the nurse’s face, sending a chill down her spine.
“What is wrong with you? Picking on Derpy, of all ponies? She gets enough of that without you helping out!” Nurse Redheart snapped, the anger clear in her voice. “She told me such awful things about you, that I was sure you had a doppelganger, but here you are! I have half a mind to kick you out right now.”
Trixie’s eyes widened as Nurse Redheart yelled at her, and pushed herself as far back in her chair as possible. This was supposed to be a great day, but everything just kept going wrong. It was just too much for Trixie. She broke down. The image of the mare’s angry face started to blur. “T-Trixie didn’t do a-anything!” She choked out, feeling the tears run down her cheeks.
Freezing mid rant, Nurse Redheart quickly took two steps back. From the look on her face, she had been prepared for an argument, not this. She still shot back, but much of the venom had dropped from her voice. “W-what do you mean, you didn’t? I saw you, didn’t I?”
“S-saw Trixie do what?” She tried to wipe her eyes with her wrist as she spoke, but failed to make much headway in keeping her vision clear. “T-Trixie was just doing tricks for Dinky! Why does everypony keep thinking the worst of Trixie? Or saying Trixie’s done things she hasn’t?!”
It wasn’t fair at all. The list of supposed crimes Trixie had committed against ponykind just kept growing, but she knew she’d not done anything wrong. It was nearly enough to make her doubt her own sanity. At least if she was a psychopath this whole thing would make sense.
Nurse Redheart hesitated for a moment, but finally spoke. “I saw how worried Dinky was, why did you say you were going to make her disappear?”
“B-but Trixie never said that.” Trixie hiccupped, and held up the muffin for Nurse Redheart to see. “Trixie said muffin, not Dinky. This one, see? They don’t even sound the same.”
For a moment, Nurse Redheart was silent, but her expression ran through a gambit of emotions, first was shock, then came barely suppressed mirth, and finally, it settled on concern. “Oh Celestia. I-I guess that’s plausible… Well, If that’s true, than this was all a misunderstanding…” Though it sounded good, something in the mare’s voice betrayed she was not entirely convinced. Still, she offered a hoof to Trixie, and smiled kindly. “You look like you’re in need of a refill. How about we get you some water, would you like that?”
Though on some level, Trixie knew Nurse Redheart was trying to help, she loathed being condescended to. “Trixie is not a small foal,” she growled, and rubbed her eyes again. This was probably not her most intimidating moment, as proven by the very unimpressed look Nurse Redheart gave her. “…water sounds good.”
As it turned out, some water really did do Trixie a lot of good. It calmed her down, and gave her some time to compose herself, before Nurse Redheart led her into the examination room. There was no further talk of the misunderstanding, as neither of them were comfortable bringing it up again. It suited Trixie just fine, Redheart was not the one she wanted to talk to about it anyway.
The physical examination was not much more interesting to Trixie than the magical one had been. However, she had to admit it was a lot more complicated.
It started off with a few simple questions about her age and weight, and, after a skeptical look from Nurse Redheart, an actual weighing. The results were subject to a hefty protest, and swearing Redheart to secrecy on penalty of death.
Shockingly, not getting much exercise for a couple of weeks, coupled with eating better than Trixie was used to, had left her just a bit greater than she would have liked.
The first actual tests involved Nurse Redheart shining a little light in her eyes, ears, and mouth. Once Redheart was apparently satisfied, she moved on to testing reflexes with a small hammer, followed by asking Trixie to cough while she listened to her chest.
Though Trixie would never say so out loud, she kind of enjoyed the attention. It gave a nice feeling, to be touched. Even if it was completely mundane, it left a tingling feeling that made her want to swing by that spa again after this and get an actual massage.
That sounds pretty good actually.
Once the thought had entered Trixie’s mind, there was no getting rid of it. She barely took notice of the rest of the exam, and merely imagined herself laying down while those two spa ponies worked on her back. Though at some point during the fantasy, that Trixie could not remember, they had morphed into Dash and Fluttershy.
All too soon, Nurse Redheart’s voice ruined it. “Trixie? Hello? I said: We’re done.”
“Oh, right. Trixie knew that.” Feeling her face flush, Trixie quickly trotted to the door. “Well, goodbye!”
“Errr… Don’t you want to know the results?” Nurse Redheart called after her.
Trixie froze in her tracks. Of course, how could she have forgotten about that? “Oh, uhm, Trixie assumed it would be like the magic exam. You know, analyze date, err data! Results pending, all that.” She turned around sheepishly to trot back to Redheart.
Nurse Redheart shook her head. “You really were out of it. I already told you Doctor Shot would bring his results in any moment. He actually came in, greeted you, gave me the report and walked out!”
“Err, T-Trixie was, erm, preoccupied.”
Sighing, Redheart laid a file down on the table, flicking through the pages. “Clearly you were. Well, I can already tell you that, physically, you are in good health. Especially when considering you have pretty much just been lying in bed the past couple of weeks. Most earth ponies I examine would be jealous.”
Grinning, Trixie puffed up her chest with pride. “Well, Trixie is pretty amazing. She used to travel all around Equestria, you know, pulling a whole stage-cart no less.” It was a little strange to be boasting about doing physical labor that she hated, but any port in a storm.
Nurse Redheart rolled her eyes, but kept smiling. “Yes, well good news then, you are healing well. So well in fact, that you are now officially cleared for using basic level magic. You keep this up and you’ll be back on the road in a few weeks!”
“Hah!” Trixie cheered. “Trixie knew it! Magic at last!” Her first thought was to levitate the nearest object and swing it around in celebration, but the prognosis stopped her in her tracks. “…back on the road in a few weeks?”
“Well, yes. I know, you are in a hurry to leave, but I’m sorry I really cannot in good conscious clear you to take a trip like that as you are. But don’t worry, it won’t be long now. You will get to leave all this nasty business behind you soon.”
Trixie folded her ears back. “H-heh… yeah… Trixie can’t wait to get out of this one-horse town...”
“Now, I just want to stress that while you are recovering well, you are still especially vulnerable to blows to the head. Everypony is of course, but it is especially dangerous if you’re still recovering from a concussion. If you need a visualization, an easy rule of hoof is to just assume anything will hit you twice as hard.”
Trixie no longer had her full attention on the conversation, instead she couldn’t help lingering on those words. A few weeks….
Fortunately, the important stuff that Redheart tried to tell Trixie were all things that she already knew, thanks to Fluttershy. Even better, her trip here had proven that she was not in danger from minor impacts anymore, and the lack of a headache following the Derpy incidents indicated that stress was no longer going to bring about migraines either. “Trixie knows. Is there anything else?”
Nurse Redheart shook her head. “Nothing worth mentioning right now, just keep eating healthy, and try to get a little more exercise in. You can tell Fluttershy it’s ‘doctors orders’ if she tries to stop you, but don’t overdo it.”
“Trixie just wants to make sure, everything we discussed, you are not allowed to say a word about it, right?”
“Yes, everything we talk about, and your medical information, all of it is confidential.”
This was good, the less ponies had any real idea of what kind of shape she was in the better. Though there was not really a guarantee. Redheart could let something slip unintentionally, but more importantly than that, someone with sufficient authority could simply look into her file. “That is acceptable. That’s all then. Do you think Trixie could use a shower?”
Redheart looked caught by surprise, her eyes briefly ran over Trixie then she shook her head slowly. “Uhm, no? You look clean, and you smelled fine. N-not that it’s something I pay attention to! Just some patients have a, uhm, ‘musk’.”
Trixie blinked. It took a moment for the bit to drop, but once it did she drug a hoof down her face. “Ugh, not like that! Trixie is asking permission to use a shower!”
Redhearts snow-white fur did absolutely nothing to hide her embarrassment, the red in her face shone through like a beacon. “Oh. Oh! Yes, of course. Go right ahead!” She made a vague gesture with her hoof towards the door leading back to the waiting room. “Just keep going and take the second door on the right.” She seemed very eager to get rid of Trixie.
“Thank you.” Sniggering, Trixie made her way towards the door. Pausing at the threshold, she looked over her shoulder. As casual as she could, she asked her question, “Oh, uh, one more thing… Why did the letter refer to Trixie as ‘Lulamoon’?” This was it, she was going to find out just who was behind this, pulling unknown strings.
“Oh, well...” Nurse Redheart paged through the file and held out one of the pages.
Trixie recognized it as her patient chart, though it was marred with hoofprints and creases from the tough time it had when it was used to chase Rainbow Dash out of her room.
Trixie Doe.‘The Great and Powerful’ Lulamoon
Suspected Trauma, Stress and Magic induced Brain Damage.
Coma, keep under observation.
In case of change alert Nurse Redheart.
KEEP RAINBOW DASH OUT!!
It was mostly the same as Trixie remembered it, and a small grin played on her lips as she read the command to keep Dash at bay. It had not done much good. What drew her attention the most though was the fresh addition to her name, the most edited part of the chart by far.
“It was Nurse Manners’ idea. She felt just awful about what happened, and she was telling me about the argument you had with her. You know, before you left. She remembered you were upset that she called you ‘Doe’, and said it was the least she could do for you.”
Trixie looked down at the chart, then up at Redheart, then finally back down at the chart, staring at her corrected name, just as she had demanded. At last she had discovered who the mastermind was that knew her real name.
It was official, she was an idiot.
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Nurse Redheart, get your mind out of the gutter.
4968783
I have no idea how you reached this conclusion.
4968879 Pffft. I guess my mind was in the gutter. I stand by what I said.
I guess that was my last slip up, before my birthday.
4968930
Naughty.
Happy Birthday!
4968783 oh my god, I didn't even think of it like that!
4968934 Thanks
Gonna be 24, and I have a interview the following day.
4968944
My bad, I think I started a gutter chain reaction.
4968958 we all have those moments, I know I have. Good luck with your interview.
4968958
4969023
"A dirty mind is a joy forever."
Good luck on the interview.
4969023 Thanks
4969037 Thanks
Gonna have to be professional Michael. Anything Mike like, will jeopardise the interview. Cause for some odd reason, people seem to have a low sense of humor around Rochester.
4969037
Channeling your inner immaturity typically wields excellent results.
4969119
Well, that just gave a new and frighting meaning to "Get in touch with your inner child."
4969125
*shudder* I guess we're really in pretty deep now. I wonder how deep the rabbit hole goes?
I was kinda hoping for Trixie to run out of the hospital, crying he head off, then Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash, in a fit of hysterical rage, begin knocking some heads in.
4969331
That possibility may have been part of why Redheart changed her tune.
I actually played with the idea of having RD return at the time, but that was just a little too conveniently timed if I did that, right after an unfortunate bit of timing with Derpy. ^^
Heh, Freudian slip
I hope Trixie gets things cleared up with Derpy soon
Random side note: Hey Crows, remember how one of the ships I was considering doing for the competition was Derpfoot? Well...
also, how cute is this...
th01.deviantart.net/fs71/PRE/i/2013/039/c/7/cadet_derpy_by_baumkuchenpony-d5u8nw8.png
Just got me thinking about it
fimfiction-static.net/images/story_images/28196.png?1337908093
After thinking about the last few chapters, I'm really curious about those Trixie rumors. Not sure how much of a storm it's gonna bring, for poor Trixie.
4969373
Just so I'm clear, where?
Derpy looks awesome, but I do not believe for a second that is anything other than a nightmare night costume.
Daww teen Scootaloo. Oh my goodness that's just cute.
Why do I feel like Dash is dead and Scoots is living her dream.
4969386
They'd have to find her first, and she's cunningly disguised as herself!
... There may be trouble.
4969421
4969418 You know, with the whole shower thing, I figured it was intentional, espically consider your conversation with Mike and the use of the line 'sometimes a cigar is just a cigar'.
Why ya gotta keep Derpy down? Though you're probably right
She is such a cutie, while I'm not 100% sure yet... I think she may be my favourite filly
Jesus, that got dark quickly
4969331
They just come in like: 'Is Rainbow Dash gonna have ta choke a bitch?'
4969365 T'woulda made for excellent drama
4969463 Hahaha I could see her saying that too!
4969463
It might not have been intentional.
The misunderstanding, yes, though I'm not sure where the Freudian slip is.
I'm a total ableist.
I don't think I could pick a fav filly, cause that means picking a fav crusader, which is just plain impossible cause they are all so cute.
My bad, I meant to say she's living RD's dream, not that she's living in a dream. Like, following her path.
4969489
Indeed it would have.
Ultimately it was more trouble than it was worth though, since absolutely nothing would get done.
Except maybe that romantic day of beating ponies up together that Trixie imagined.
Besides, quite a few parts of the story involve very specific timing already, I don't want to over do it and risk it becoming unbelievable.
4969516 Good point ... BUT DA DRAMA!
4969503 Keep in mind a Freudian slip isn't just people saying like PENIS, then they're like 'oh shit, why'd I say that'
a Freudian slip is any dialog, memory or action that is interfered with by the subconscious, so when Nurse Redheart thought something might be going on *wink* *wink* that's a Freudian slip. (I maaaaay have taken Psychology in school 
)
I'm still not sure if I could pick a favourite filly, while I don't particularly care about non crusader fillies (except Dinky, she's cute
) I do find it hard to pick between the crusaders. I'm always like 'It's Scootaloo... no Applebloom... no Sweetie Belle... I don't know!' 
I was referring to the part about Dash being dead! I mean if Scoots is 8 and Rainbow 21, that means she's 13 years older. How young does Dash die in your world?
4969943
Oh, I will keep that in mind, heh.
Psychology sounds like it would be fun to have in school.
Fav Filly: CMC
There, all done. We can just make them into some kind of Trinity right? No need to choose.
Oh, well clearly RD didn't die of old age. Perhaps a disease, or accident, or noble sacrifice, or vanished, or vanquished.
It's just that expression on her face that makes me feel that way.
4970126
It was really fun
though difficult as hell 
Sounds good to me
though now I feel like Twilight's gonna come out of nowhere and say 'deciding not to choose isn't a decision'. Damn you Twilight, you magnificent mare 
This is just getting darker and darker! I show you a cute picture of Scootaloo in a wonderbolts suit, and you start speculating how Rainbow Dash died?!
4970196
Ya know, I never really agreed with that.
Choosing not to choose either of two options, and going with a third is definitely a choice.
Well, I do have a Drama Queen title to uphold.
4970286
Yeah, but that only really counts if ya make a decision but go with a new option, but deciding to do nothing about it is kinda something else, ya know?
Of course, your highness
this is a first for me i'm not commenting on the story but the author note at the end. "Sometimes a cigar is just a Cigar."?
was that connected to the story in someway because i don't understand.
4980631
I do not claim to understand what went through my mind at five in the morning.
Earth
_____________
But sometimes a cigars a bubble gum. Or a high yeild explosive to help with a persons nuklear arthritis. I hope she isn't going to do something stupd like say she cant do magic for months. And is perminantly injured. She should be truthful. At least in the fact that she can do magic, and needs excercise.
5365681
I'm not sure if I should capitalize Earth pony if I am not capitalizing unicorn or pegasus? For consistancy.
5365699
It'd be more consistent if you did, since you had it capped in an earlier chapter. And technically you could get away with capitalizing Pegasi and Unicorns ... it's one of those weird things I've seen both ways. As both capped and lower cased.
I'm surprised the massage Trixie fantasized about didn't involve jam.
Corrections;
uncapitalize 'Her' in 'but Her expression ran through'
and
'Redhearts snow-white fur' should be 'Redheart's snow white fur'
Comments;
Because schadenfreude.
Half the mind, double the fun.
Trixie "Woobie" Lulamoon.
Best line in the history of forever.
This pony gets it.
The unimpressed look on Redheart's face must have been priceless.
And in all the wrong places too!
Viiiiirgiiiiin.
You should try writing some porn, Trixie. I'm getting the idea you'd be great at it.
Trixie really needs to get laid.
You say that and then pirates swoop down on you to steal your all your booty.
Isn't the nearest object Redheart? I'd have loved to see that.
"Attention to all hooves, mouth opening. I repeat..."
It's also the only edited part.
Quoted for Truth.
5810663
After three months of silence, I was almost sure that final Derpy crack was one too many for you and you'd abandoned fic. Glad to see that I will have to try harder.
You'd think Trixie would know that, being from Europe and all.
I actually lost three hours when I googled this and ended up on TV tropes. I think I got off lightly.
But it certainly does fit Trixie, especially some of the variants. Heck, she's even specifically mentioned as an example a couple times. Trixie is more famous than she thinks.
Cue chapter 88