• Member Since 19th Oct, 2012
  • offline last seen May 30th, 2021

Shadowflame


It's been a while, but I'm back home! Don't know when I'll write something for this site again, but enjoy my other stuff in the meantime!

T

The Midnight Game: This 'activity' starts by summoning a demon, called The Midnight Stallion, and allowing him into your home. In order to keep this demon at bay, you must carry a lit candlestick to light the darkness of the house. Your only task in this game is to survive the night from 12:00 AM until the Midnight Stallion leaves at 3:33 AM. Besides your candle, the only other item you can use is salt, where in an emergency, you may make a salt circle around yourself to keep the demon at bay.

Rules
-You must stay inside the house, and no other lights can be on except for your own candle.
-You must keep moving. Otherwise, the Midnight Stallion will be able to find you easily, and will snuff out your light.
-If your candle goes out, you have ten seconds to relight it. Any later, and you will fall prey to this demon.
-If you exceed ten seconds while attempting to relight your candle, then you must retreat into a salt circle to protect yourself from the demon. Failure to do so will result in your fate falling into the hooves of the Midnight Stallion.
-If you retreat to the salt circle, or if the Midnight Stallion catches you without the candle's light, then you lose the Midnight Game.

Applebloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo decide they want to play the game inside Carousel Boutique. They see no wrong in it, but like most pagan rituals... Almost everything is wrong with it.

Rated Teen for horror content.... Like actual, 'crap your pants in a dark room' content.

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 23 )

He... hehe... I ain't much of a chicken... but I wasn't planning to sleep anyway... hehe...

This some good stuff.

Please. You've never played the Midnight Game. :p

4188766
Please, you've never felt a demon nearby. :p

4191488 Please. I am a demon. :p

4191982 Please, I'm the half-brother of a demon. I know what it's like being in the presence of one.

4228145
Please, I'm a writer.:ajsmug::trollestia:

Twilight read off the final rules in quick succession, "DO NOT turn on any lights during the Midnight Game.

"DO NOT use a flashlight during the Midnight Game.

"DO NOT go to sleep during the Midnight Game.

"DO NOT use another pony's blood on your name.

"DO NOT use a lighter or magic to substitute for a candle. It will not work.

"DEFINITELY DO NOT attempt to provoke the Midnight Stallion in ANY WAY.

Don't eat sliced cheese, cubed is fine

Don't stomp around

Don't wave your flashlight in the air they take that as a challenge

Don't play your clarinet horribly

Don't wear a sombrero in a goofy fashion

Don't wear clown shoes

And whatever you do, don't EVER screech like a chimpanzee!

4665772
Dat Spongebob reference.

Will read another night (possibly tomorrow, when I don't have to wake up super early).

The name brought me here (cause its 11:30 pm here) but the description hooked me.

I wanna mention to ya though that I like how you seem'd to wait till the wee-late hours to post this, as it fits what the premise is.

Makes me think about camping trips and my first steps into the Slender blog/vlogs.

~AnimatedGamer

4695992
Thank you for that comment. Makes me feel actually smart for a change.

Truth is, I was just like,
"Hey, I got this chapter, and it hasn't been posted yet.:rainbowhuh: Why don't I just post it now?:yay:"

No other thoughts accompanied this statement.:scootangel:

Of course it's 11:40 when I see this:P
*reads*
That ending I guess was too happy, there should not be an ability to quit the game, maybe with the salt being a one-use save to re-light your candle with Sweetiebelle using it up at the start in her panic. There should never be a safe way out of the game except to win, which would make Scootaloo's determination to win make sense instead of just doing it out of pride which in a horror scenario does not make sense. You have to relate with the characters such as with Lyle who I could picture as myself at parts, Scotaloo, not so much because everyone, if they really were scared as a rational human being would be they would chicken out, I know I would. The actual horror part was too short, being 1 out of 3 chapters, there should be a very gradual descent into darkness, letting the tension build. The Mannequin bit was good, but Sweetiebelle was a bit slow to realise that ANYTHING out of place when playing a game like this usually means something really bad, but I guess that's just horror movie logic for ya. As soon as a weakling character such as a filly can muster the courage to stand up against a monstrosity the actual monster seems a lot less scary, come on, if a child can stand up against something surely a grown man could too (or woman, or teenager whatever like I said it's late)

Overall it was good, giving me a good shudder. The way it was written, language grammar etc was good, and I'm being serious that I was still given a few chills, but the story design is lacking as aforementioned. Seriously good though, it may seem like I'm writing in the negative, but I'm not since I can't exactly tell you step by step with what you did right because, well you did right XD
You have potential, but I don't want you to write creepy fic. You know why? BECAUSE I WANT TO SEE HOW THEY GO ON THEIR DATE. But besides that you could write creepy fic.

P.S. If this seems weird in any way, it's kinda late and it's a Tuesday, late night plus early morning plus late night messes up your mind

4697649
Well, thank you for the critique! It really helps, and I'm sure your feedback will greatly help if I write a small horror thing in one of my current stories. This was just an attempt, so I could get better in this type of area.

P.s: The date chapter is half done. It's almost here.

4915498
YES!! Finally, someone catches the reference!

At first I tho6ght it was just a mannequin just o scrw with sweetie belle but then I realized, Midnight Stallion more like SLENDERMANO! Oh well it was good that's what counts I guess.

SLENDY!!! :pinkiecrazy: OML that scared me so much. Given that I have had sledy nightmares (or should say night stallions?) for last month I should NOT have read this.
thanks for making me:pinkiecrazy: lololol

buck yer im reading this i love a good horror

"W-what did the-... It mean when it said it'd be watching."

Don't leave me hanging!

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