Alexandrite Ward
Joined 1st Feb, 2013 ·
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Beautiful.
A nice little blurb of emotions, but your readers won't be expecting humans - especially based off of the picture.
I remember reading the Opera Phantom Discord story but never finished. It was a nice surprise tonight to see your stuff again, just from looking randomly in the new story section.
One thing - and I'm pretty sure it's intentional - is when you repeat certain phrases over and over. I know that's for effect, but personally I find it distracting, and because it happens so much, it makes the story's descriptions feel superfluous and "stuck".
Fluttershy being a monster herself is a nice take on this ship. I'm not aware if Discord has the same powers here as he does normally, but I'm assuming he'd be the victim either way.
Again, nice short story.
This reminds me a lot of "Once Upon a Time" in the Beauty and the Beast episode. The dialogue is very similar.
Very Yes
3871946
I was watching it a few days ago and it did give me ideas, hopefully it's not to similar? I'll have to take a look, I didn't want to pull much from it, it originally reminded me of a scene from Phantom Opera Discord and not so much from Once Upon a Time but it was the original spark for this.
I've changed the dialogue a but, this was a rough draft when posted, and I took what you said into account, so if you want to take a look hopefully it will feel more original. I always appreciate your comments! :)
3871872
I'll take your idea into consideration and take another look at my story, I may not need a lot of repeating to get my ideas across (but I also need 1000 words xD) The key to this story is change, and change is a scary thing, for Discord and Fluttershy.
I've changed things around a bit if you want to take a look :) I wasn't able to get rid of a lot of the repetition though, was there any spot you felt was really bad? I'd be happy to clean that up. I want the story to flow as good as possible.
3872040
Thank you!
3871812
Thanks! I'm glad you liked it!
3873776 Nah, it's really fine. I pointed out all the things I could find in my last post, though I did have trouble trying to figure out the setting and what was supposed to be going on. But I think that assisted it in a weird way. Good job with your story!
So beautiful
Love it keep doing your best
Will always be waiting for another story
I hope you make something like phantom of the opera discord. Like try to get it with blueblood fighting for fluttershy's love . Pretty please even through I wanted to back hoof him every chapter but the stories made me cry. U and Disney fanatic has inspired me to write a story of my own I hope it comes out by summer and I hope u will read it any way lively and so passionate storie
I was rooting for her to pull something like this during that scene.
It....it..... him..... they..... I'm crying....
Sweet Luna!
I really hate this ship, but dear god did you write this well.
Because I'm lazy, I'm just going to paste in bits of my blog review here:
This utterly blindsided me. It is far and away the best FlutterCord [Romance] story I have read. Admittedly, many such fics are absolute tripe, but this one is genuinely excellent – and quite beautifully written, too. Even if you despise the pairing, you'll probably get something out of the quality of the prose. If you only ever read one FlutterCord shipfic, make it this thousand-word gem.
7398598 Thank you very much! I always love it when people enjoy my stories.
7400704 Well, who doesn't? But this one was wonderful. I wish I'd read it much sooner.
7128723
HOW DARE YOU? it IS ONE OF THE BEST SHIPS IN THE UNIVERSE!!!WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!!!???
8021739
I don't see Discord as having anything in common with mortals, let alone the ability to connect with them the a deep, emotional level needed for true romance.
Also, it's just so obvious a ship. There's no challenge in it, no effort needed to put these two together. It's just like SoarinFire that way, gross and boring.
Great job! You did a beautiful job in writing these characters! It's very emotional, I love how you wrote Discord's emotion in this situation. Amazing job!
Such a sweet little drabble of one of my favorite stories of all time!
I love this and I can see the Rumbelle influences from OUAT episodes “Skin Deep” I wish Belle had reacted this way.
Mmmm deliciously emotional. 1000/10 stars.