Separated by Penguin

by Pump It Up

Your Reaction to the Title is Expected; or, Ridiculousness

“Hey guys!” Rainbow Dash said as she flew towards her friends.

“Pinkie, you can’t be serious.”

“Oh, but I am, Twilight! Pumpkin Cherry Surprise is really tasty!”

“Guys?” Rainbow said as she landed.

“Hey AJ—” Pinkie Pie bounced over to Applejack “—do you wanna try Pumpkin Cherry Surprise?”

“Pinkie, what Ah really need t’ do is get back t’ work. Ah don’t rightly know why we’re all jus’ standin’ ‘round.”

“Neither do I, now that you mention it.” Twilight brought up a hoof in contemplation.

“Hey guys!” Rainbow literally jumped up and down. “Anypony? I’m here!”

When nopony responded, the pegasus groaned in frustration. “If you guys won’t talk to me, I’ll— I’ll go see Zecora! Yeah, I’m going to see Zecora!” She stuck out her tongue at the other three and stormed off.

“Anypony else feel that? Maybe it’s somepony wanting to try my new shake!”

“Pinkie…”

◊◊◊◊◊

“Who must this be, knocking on my tree?”

“Zecora? Are you home?” Rainbow Dash yelled as she pounded on the door.

“I am always home. I was just munching on this honeycomb.” Zecora set down the honeycomb and opened the door. She quickly side-stepped as Rainbow flew in. The blue pegasus pulled a 180 in order to prevent crashing.

“What a pleasant surprise Rainbow Dash! I am glad you didn’t crash.”

“So am I.” Rainbow touched down, blurting, “Zecora, all my friends are ignoring me!”

“Is this true? See all of them, did you?” Zecora asked as she sat down.

“Uh… no. Fluttershy and Rarity weren’t there.”

“And how long has this been going on? A week ago or this dawn?”

“Just this morning.” Rainbow Dash looked sheepish. “Maybe I was a bit quick in rushing off.”

“You were indeed very quick. Did you try and give them a flick?”

“You mean poke them?”

Zecora nodded.

“No. Is it wrong if I think it’s a curse?”

“Not at all, my blue friend. One more thing before this visit will end.”

Zecora continued to speak, but her voice changed; it became deeper, more throaty, and Australian (although Rainbow didn’t know the accent). “You have t’ find out what exactly it is about you or about what you’re doin’ that makes them not respond t’ ya. There must be some element. You need to overcome that element so you can be reunited with your friends.”

Rainbow Dash shrank back. “What happened to your voice? And what kind of advice was that? My friends like me!”

“I know not what to say,” Zecora said in her normal voice, “it just came out that way.”

“Uh, well, thanks Zecora. See ya!” the pegasus flew away.

“That was strange indeed. To my help, she paid no heed. But in the long-run, that is alright, for helped not, it might."

◊◊◊◊◊

Rainbow landed near her friends, who were strangely still in the same place.

“…and so Pound tried to eat the rug, but it wasn’t working…”

Rainbow ignored Pinkie Pie. She wasn't her target, anyway. Rainbow reached out to poke Twilight.

Her hoof stopped short.

“…and so I said, ‘No Poundie! Those are breakfast cupcakes, not snack cupcakes!’”

Rainbow’s eyes widened as she tried, unsuccessfully, to poke Twilight.

“Hey guys! Want me to sing a song?”

“Pinkie, again, Ah need t’ get back t’ work! Last time Ah tried, Apple Bloom nearly bowled me over!”

“Why was she in the orchard?” asked Twilight.

“Ah think she said somethin’ ‘bout earthworms…”

Rainbow Dash quickly looked around for something to throw. She spotted a table nearby, and while she swore it wasn't there before, it worked.

She put her hooves around it and flapped her wings, lifting it into the air, and dropped it.

It never hit the trio.

With slack jaw, Rainbow watched as the table stopped a few feet above their heads and set itself down not to far away.

“Wha— Bu— This can't—” She shook her head. “You know what? I’m going to say something so irresistible, they’ll have to pay attention to me. Uh…” She thought for a moment. “Cardboard unicorn,” she said slowly. “Blue rhinoceros. Cherry stapler. Strawberry fajita.”

Pinkie Pie gasped. “Did somepony say ‘strawberry fajita’?!”

“Pinkie, what the hay is—”

“Don’t stop me, Applejack, or the consequences will never be the same!”

“What?”

Rainbow Dash repeated, “Strawberry fajita.”

“Strawberry fajita!” the pink mare repeated as she bounced over.

“Strawberry fajita.” Rainbow landed.

“Strawberry fajita!”

“Strawberry fajita.”

“Strawberry fajita!”

Pinkie came closer and closer, until she was close enough that the blue pegasus tapped her on the snout.

“Oh hey, Dashie! Where have you been all day?”

With a crack of thunder (although the sky was clear), the two were flung apart. Rainbow Dash hit a tree and felt the breath knocked from her. Gasping, she looked up to see—

“A penguin?!”

Indeed, a penguin (who looked big and plushy) came towards her. He got in her face and didn’t speak for a few long seconds.

“Vhy did you break my curse?”

“So it was a curse.” Rainbow would have said it with more enthusiasm, but she was in shock from being thrown up against a tree. That, and the penguin’s voice.

“I spent veeks un veeks on zat curse! And you just brrroke it!”

She managed to get to her hooves. “Uh, who are you exactly?”

“Third grade? You invited everyone to your birthday pahty except me.”

Rainbow's puzzled expression remained for a split second more before she exclaimed, “I remember you! You’re the Penguin!”

“Yes, but I was known by a different name.” He paused dramatically. “Penguin.”

“I said that.”

“Yes, but you said it a little differently.”

“The reason why I never invited you is because you never showed to school. You’re a penguin for crying out loud, penguins can’t walk on clouds!” Rainbow argued.

“Zat is a lie! I most zertainly attended classes!"

"Tell me one thing you learned!"

"Well, I remember— Wait, what is happening?”

Penguin was enveloped in a purple aura and shoved off to the side.

“So let me get this straight,” Twilight said, trotting forward. “You, Mr. Penguin—“

“Penguin.”

“—whatever, put a curse on Rainbow here because she didn’t invite you to her birthday party in third grade?”

“Yes!”

With a bemused expression, Twilight flung Penguin away.

“Ahhh!” Penguin’s voice faded away.

"Dear Celestia, the nerve of some creatures..."

“Twilight!" Rainbow Dash enveloped her unicorn friend in a hug. "You saved me!”

“Rainbow, he was a stuffed penguin.” Twilight rolled her eyes. “The worst he could have done was waddle at you.”

“Aw, I wanted to hug him!”

“Pinkie…”

Comments

[electreXcessive]

I thought you were no longer in the one-shotober challenge?

[Pump It Up]

3329516
I never quit; others did, but not I!

[Smirkythread]

October is going to be the death of my sanity.

[pegasistershorty]

i have lost every bit of sanity. first i am saddled being mickey mouse for halloween, second, one-shotober has many random stories

[Nope Not Happening]

My sanity has gone out the window This was funny, but if this is what One-shotober is gonna be like... oy vey. October's gonna be the vein of my existence lol. Nah jk, this pretty funny, but a little messed up. There's a little bit that you could have improved on, but I didn't mind it

[Zeyon The Green]

Nobody expects the Penguin. He'll be back with a vengeance.
static3.fjcdn.com/thumbnails/comments/Futurama+anyone+_3726ca14a386cca3667285d35f447deb.jpg
So was Zecora trying to say that it was a Penguin Elemental?

[Nyperold]

Would a strawberry fajita be related to a chimicherrychanga?

[deletingthisaccount]

Hah! I have no idea what just happened, but it was pretty cute!

[Pump It Up]

3331260
No. That was a line from Black Piraka is Lonely.

3331411
Not sure. I don't know what that is.

3331784
Thanks!

[That_G3_Obsessive]

What... Just... Happened...

[Pump It Up]

3337798
Stuff.

[That_G3_Obsessive]

3337824 Naturally.

[Nyperold]

Well no wonder, because Pinkie Pie made it up! (Nevertheless, some fans have taken the concept and made it into a real foodstuff; I suspect the same could be done with Rainbow Dash's "strawberry fajita".)

[Pump It Up]

3341884
Yeah, but IDK how tasty it might be; here's a picture of one:
upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/f/f9/Flickr_elisart_324248450--Beef_and_chicken_fajitas.jpg
Yeah... It'd take a lot to make it work.

I did look at the cherry thingy... It looks pretty good!

[TheWraithWriter]

I don't... what?

Anyway, just read everything but dialogue in Morgan Freeman's voice for a good time. Read dialogue in his voice for an even better time.

[Eskerata]

Inspired lunacy. Upvote from me.

[Cromegas_Flare]

Your story has been Reviewed!
This link here!

[Pump It Up]

3716726
Thanks.

[AkemiTheSunbro]

Alright then. That managed to kill like 7 minutes.

[Pump It Up]

3795165

[AkemiTheSunbro]

3796195

[MissingLink]

fc03.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/060/f/5/princess_celestia_approved_by_ambris-d4rftlj.png

Approved for Celestia's Library.

Approver's Note: Wha-what did I just read? *in a good way*

[Pump It Up]

3796890
You don't know how much I like reading the reactions of those who read this.

Thanks.

[Pump It Up]

3931061
Thanks!

[Flash_Magnus]

So random it's good!

[Pump It Up]

4272995

[ColdGoldLazarus]

What.

[Pump It Up]

6250794

I take it you've never watched the Jaller series before?

[ColdGoldLazarus]

6251838 Jaller series? No, I don't believe so.

[Pump It Up]

6251851
As you probably saw, I put a some links to three episodes in the description. It's all one big series with different, random shorts, all revolving around Jaller Inika (who is an idiot), Hewkii (his slightly less of an idiot brother), Axon (their uncle because reasons), Kyle (an Ehylek who only speaks in grunts), Black Piraka (who, up until the episodes in the description and another episode, couldn't interact with anyone), and after a certain point, Hoo (a Swedish-sounding Mark Surge 2.0). It's very random but hilarious and does not adhere to BIONICLE canon at all with the exception of the names (excluding Nuparu, who was called Hahli, Photok being called Juaquen(?), and Black Piraka, obviously) .

[ColdGoldLazarus]

6251930 Huh, interesting. I'll have to check it out sometime!

[Pump It Up]

6252081
You very much ought to! It's great.

[Andy Ray]

Welp... There could have been more drama to this story. I'm sad to say, you wasted a good plot .

[Pump It Up]

9439352
To be fair, I wrote this too heavily relying on the source material, and this was during One-Shotober, when I was trying to get a lot of stories out. I was also a lot younger when I wrote this, and I had a tendency to focus more on dialogue than anything else then.

[Andy Ray]

9441633
Understood. I tried to write a simple one-shot myself... but ended up writing three decent-length chapters ... Can't get a hold of the characters, who make the plot go on. But the dialogue really pushes the plot forward, that's for sure. Nothing like a dialogue-driven plot!.. One doesn't just make it through thanks to dialogues, though.