Lightning Flash is an alicorn with the extraordinary power of lightning and thunder. He is the son of one of celestia's friends who sadly come to pass when he was only a baby. His father abandoned the family before his birth, Celestia raised him like a son and grew to love him. He was sent to trottingham as a colt however to attend one of its most prestigious schools. It has been a long time since he had left and he is now returning home, Celestia has requested the mane 6 to help her welcome him home. (cover art made by me)
Chapters (2)
Oh ahit! Just by the description, it could already attract a lot of downvotes.
2691805 How so?
Hehe nice idea!! I especially Love it ;-)
Brilliant chapter and can't wait to find out what happens to little Lightning next!!
Good Luck,
Brony and Dashing Proud,
LightningFlashCJ
2691835
You have a male alicorn oc raised by Celestia, that's how.
Also just reading through your very first paragraph I can say you need some editing. For starters Equestria and Canterlot both need to be capital.
2691835 What 2691858 said.
I think you should do a little capitalization, my good sir.
2691858 Im sorry about that im still actually getting use to grammar, punctuation and things of that nature..ill go fix that and i might just have someone edit for me.
2691835 I think this need a rewrite. Make the alicorn into an earth pony and change the name to something else. Something more subtle like... uh... Light Streak or something. I don't know. Anything but Lightning Flash, though. It sounds like a super hero. Also, please have the character progressively get stronger. Like he's able to conjure sparks as a colt, but when he is grown he can summon the power of Thor himself. That kind of thing. It's just that usually this kind of story is best in that format instead of the way Captain Marvel did it where as the protagonist gets godlike abilities at a young age.
Or I'm just spewing shit like a fountain on overdrive.
Either way, just change the OC and everything will clear up. A Gary Stu is to be avoided at all costs. This has amazing potential. Editors might also help.
2769493
I like the name Lightning Flash thank you very much....
2769688 Well, that's just my opinion. And as such, it is only morally right to accept yours.
2769493 My intentions will be shown in dear time, this story is just beginning dear friend. Our characters story has not been told completely! Just wait, and see where this story takes us.
2770312 Yeah, I sounded a little too demanding with my previous statement... I should have said 'if'. Yeah, continue on. Also, I commend you for not using the pony creator. Anybody who doesn't use it as the story cover is good in my book.
2769924
I know, and I'm sorry. I was just saying I liked it that's all.
I like this story it has potential to become awesome