• Member Since 14th Aug, 2011
  • offline last seen February 18th

Mindblower


"We are all born mad. Some remain so." -Estragon, Waiting for Godot

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When asked why she delves into the most ancient and treacherous temples in known and unknown Equestria, Daring's most likely response is a shrug and a casual, "Eh. It's a living."

At some points, however, the most petrifying ventures have the potential to be those merely within the complex ruins of the inner city. This is one of those ventures. Daring Do, with her heaviest load of cold hard cash strapped firmly to her back, must walk through the cold hard streets of Manehattan... at night.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 26 )

(though in this case she used the term ‘friend rather loosely)

Missed a second apostrophe, I believe. Otherwise, still good!

How do two ponies know about me... without me knowing them back?

That would make an interesting episode in and of itself :pinkiehappy:

I loved it! :pinkiehappy::rainbowkiss: That build-up had me on the edge of my seat!

That was a cool idea. I like when authors remember that even if they try and make things grim dark, it still turns out to be a grim dark cartoon. So it being a cartoon where the heroine Daring always makes it out alive doesn't necessarily preclude the dark nature of the universe befalling her companions. Obviously, after many years, at the tail end of her last journey when everything's catching up to her, and she is contemplating the precarious nature of her mortality, her mind will wander from guilt to bargaining to acceptance.

The ending was unexpected, but amusing. And now that I think about it, the fact that it all seemed to have happened in the context of a cartoon character not believing in a fictional character so she sent her disposable companion on what was supposed to be a wild goose chase just makes this an endlessly complicated cyclical sandwich.

one particularly artistic pony smashed his head on the piano for others’ amusement

twentypercentcooler.net/data/e1/60/e1605401859a650d0725a88b505de370.gif
Go home Scootaloo, you are drunk...

That ending though!

That was very unexpected! I quite enjoyed that. : )

Short and sweet too; I think this one works well as a single chapter, for sure.

Oh no, not the fan mail!:rainbowwild: A few points that I think might have been fixed up, but over-all, a good story. Some confusion around the poison dart section, due to the disconnect that occurred between the first person, and third person thoughts. You had said earlier that she had begun thinking about the ways they had died, but nothing gave the impression that she was still thinking about it, and that it would be shown in text. Placing it right after that sentence, and in a separate paragraph would help.

2602658 More or less sums up my illustrative process, yes. Except sometimes I tapdance on my tablet instead.

That unexpected ending. Shame that blog doesn't update more.
Prose was top-notch, as usual. The dialogue was also spot-on. Shorter than I would've liked, but an appropriate length I suppose.
Have a fitting emoti-pony.
:scootangel:

Y u not run this thru me

Just because I ignore you doesn't mean you should ignore me! ...Yeah, that makes sense.

Very clever ending with Scootaloo and NVG's. I enojyed the build up the most and love the descriptive side notes on how he cohorts died (perhaps that's a bit dark?) At any rate, wonderful job on it, another great read. Oh, and she should have taken this: :fluttershysad: : it's always dangerous to go alone. 4.5 out of 5, only due to some confusion when the cohorts deaths were being recalled by Daring. Bravo! :moustache:

Well written, but the ending was so out of nowhere that it threw the story off-balance. The plotting was good and thoroughly interesting, but the lack of closure makes this simply a good experience rather than a complete-feeling story. Still, that certainly isn't bad; thank you for sharing.

I know it defeats the purpose of the ending, but a sequel would be greatly appreciated.

Hm... Daring's not a particularly nice pony, is she?

Nice use of "Depeche" giving her that little "message." Bilingual bonus points.

Gee, that's a darker take on Daring than I was expecting. Then again, seeing how you wrote "The Story of My Life", I really shouldn't have been surprised. This story feels almost like a pilot, considering how many things were left as "a story for another time". Good atmosphere, good characterization, good suspense, and a good story on all fronts. The dark itself is feared indeed.

Huh. I don't think you ever told me about this one. If you did, man am I forgetful.

it took me awhile to realize the implications of scootaloo finding daring do, but hell yeah that was quite the metaphorical tug on the gut. :pinkiesick:

Indeed, the appeal of characters like Indiana Jones is that they're just regular people, not pulp heroes who eat danger for breakfast. A loud crack and sudden always portends fast-paced danger in fiction, but not always in the real world. In canon, Daring Do seems to be 100% fantasy hero, so it's only natural that we'd see a few stories that tear down the veil and replace it with a practical existence.

She is weak inside when faced with typical dangers that normal people sometimes encounter. Those normal dangers put into perspective how <i>extraordinary</i> her globe-trotting trouble is, but it also shows that neither one hardens her any more or less than the other. A real person - not a daring, two-fisted adventure hero - would be hard-pressed to be so warm and optimistic if they were forced to the lengths that heroes of fiction frequently are.

Great story, well-paced, and fine work building and releasing the tension in the end. The story's last few hundred words kinda smacked down most of what I've written here, but I'm fine with that.

During the day, grand adventures await in unperturbed ruins!
During the night, scandalous dealings prosper in poorly cared-for infrastructure. I mean, the lights on that street went out almost immediately to lightning.

Good story, but I didn't understand the ending... Is this pre or post the episode? Daring fears fan mail? Daring dated, dumped and is now hiding from Dash? A little help?

Ancient nations, she found, were fond of chemical warfare.

All in all, this is a great story. I like how it places the Indiana Jones like character of Daring Do as not a "Good Guy" type adventurer, but more of a criminal adventurer, selling to the black market. I could actually see that easier than a perfect good guy.

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