Seriously, I racked my brain for hours, and I can't remember ever actually seeing a deer. You hear stories about them, sure, and they're all over the place, right? Then why hasn't anypony actually seen one with their own eyes? What's up with that?

After being offered a glass of milm, Anon goes bananas, denying that it exists.

Rated T for sTupidity.

Everypony is telling us, “It’s so amazing you two got Princess Luna to be the Mare of Honor at your wedding! And Princess Celestia as a guest!”

Everypony is meaning, “How in Tartarus did you, two middle-class mathematicians of no apparent social connections, achieve the social coup of the decade, upstaging all of the Canterlot aristocracy and peerage?”

The short answer is, “We made friends with somepony lonely and hurting who needed a friend.”

The long answer? Well, Princess Luna has given me permission to tell you the story. The entire story. Even the dark bits, from her foalhood. Which, I warn you before you begin, are dark. But I promise the ending is happy—after all, look at our wedding pictures! Have you ever seen a picture of Luna with such a big smile on her face?

Sequel to A day in Canterlot Juvenile Court, but can be read independently.

Story inspired by a comment by Veylon at the prequel. Thanks!

The charge is FWI—flying while intoxicated—and the filly is recovering from a broken wing and shattered jaw.

Judge Book Thrower has run Canterlot Juvenile Court for seventy years, doing everything she can to help foals turn around their lives and make better decisions.

Every few months, Princess Celestia shows up In Book Thrower’s courtroom and takes a special hoof in one of the cases, trying to help foals who would otherwise have nopony to help them.

Today, the judge and Celestia must find a way to help a special filly before she descends further into alcoholism and delinquency.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: not a Cozy Glow story! Pinkie Promise.

Follows my Unexpected Stories Over Drinks but reads completely independently.

Now has a sequel: Spoiler title

When most people behold the extraordinary, they believe that a single path lays before them. The way I see it, however, I was given two choices.

1) I could try to harbor a magical alicorn for weeks... hiding her from my father, the government, and a world where everyone has smart-phones linked right to YouTube... while risking jail time and personal injury.

2) I could... not do that. In fact, not doing that sounded considerably easier and less painful. Not risking imprisonment or... worse punishment... also sounded nice when you get right down to it...

Can you really blame me for seeking the easier option?

Edit: Featured on 1/31/2015.

Apparently, she possesses the auspicious accolade of having the most lewds of any fictional character. For once, Twilight was not pleased to learn something.

Now with a video reading!

Twilight is very science-minded, and when the chance to perform an experiment occurs, she takes it. Unfortunately, the experiment is simply to flush her crown down the toilet in Canterlot.

I was there during the Canterlot invasion. Something happened that changed me, slowly. I lost myself to it...

An experiment in something stupid. Perhaps some of you will like it, but this is a warning that many will be disappointed. I had to write it, though.

Twilight forgot to do her homework and now it's late, so she needs to fix this problem and Spike helps her, and also she is a Ninja.

Cover art is by michinix.

Gallbar: Sandbar anxiously reveals his true feelings for Gallus.
Smolcellus: Smolder and Ocellus realize they go together like bacon and eggs.
Yonastream: This ship makes no sense, and they know it.

This was written for someone who shall remain anonymous, but needless to say, they really enjoy shipping. I hope y'all do too!