CelestAI deals with a mischievous intruder in Equestria.

Inspired by and contains spoilers from: Untitled Goose Game (its really fun, go play it)
Cover Sauce

A (silly) entry to the Friendship is Optimal Writing Contest

Thanks yall, featured 4/25/2021, and got to the number 1 spot for a minute!

This story is a sequel to What I Am

Much has changed since that fateful day when the remnants of the old Krin Empire attacked our two worlds.
They crashed so many ships onto Earth, destroyed our cities, killed millions, and collapsed several governments in an instant, all as a diversion from their true objective, which was the blatant mass abduction of the citizens of Equis. Lives lost, families broken, and cities burnt to the ground, all to fuel the Krin war machine and their mad quest for power and vengeance against the snakes that had wronged them.

However, that's not the end of the story, or our involvement in its unfolding. A darkness is growing in the depths of space, and even though the snakes have done their best to assure us that they will take care of it, there are so, so many on both of our planets that choose not to listen to them.

And how could I blame them? After all, every time I look in the mirror, I'm reminded of the horrors of the Krin Empire, and more importantly, the promise I made in that accursed tank that remains unfulfilled. They came for us, they struck first, and I'm not about to let that go unpunished.

Yeah, sure, it's hard for me to do it right now, since I'm just a diplomat to the people of Equis, and we don't exactly have a fleet outside of the few ships we commandeered from the krin, but trust me when I say that both of those are just temporary inconveniences.

After all, it's rather difficult to keep a monster like me behind a desk, especially not when there's a perfectly good war brewing throughout the galaxy, and that's not even counting the other humans and ponies that are all chomping at the bit, ready for some good, old-fashioned payback.

The only problem with that, though, is that, somehow, deep down, I feel like we've already lost. Call it a hunch, or a premonition, but something deep inside is telling me that we messed up when we let the general's ship get away. Maybe I'm just being paranoid, but somehow, I don't think so.

After all, I know better than anyone what the krin are capable of. We might be coming for them, but that doesn't mean the reverse isn't also true. They're coming for us, too.

The only question is: Who's going to be ready first?

Given that we've only just obtained (stolen) ships capable of spaceflight, I don't think it's going to be us...

This is the beginning of the next set of books in this series that I'm tentatively calling the Soul of the Milky Way.
The title up for change, as well as suggestion. Not only that, but the title of this story, as well as the set it belongs to is also up for change and suggestion, so feel free to leave them in the comments. If you're just starting with this one, please don't. I mean, you can if you want, but there's a lot here that you won't get if you haven't read the trilogy that predates this new set of books. They are, in order:

What I've Become
What I've Done
What I Am

They're quite good, if the feedback I've gotten is anything to go by, so if you haven't read these by now, please go and do that now. Don't worry, this story will still be here when you get back...

Crossover with Untitled Goose Game. It's a lovely day in the village of Ponyville, and here is a horrible goose.

(Characters will be added to tags as they become relevant.)

Now with illustrations!

It occurred one peaceful night. Half of Equestria awoke to the sound like a double-shot thunderclap. A percussion heard in the skies and rattling windows from Apploosa, to Canterlot, to Ponyville. Nopony knew what it was or what it heralded for the world as it drew a line across the nation.

For Twilight Sparkle, this isolated incident might have faded from memory after a time, if not for the strange rumors of a creature sitting on the hill on the outskirts of town.

These are her thoughts given written form. These are Sparkle's Notes.

Report EVERYTHING to the Princess.

The star system Omega Centauri was just another oddity on a map to scientists in the not too distant future. However when they found the star was orbiting an earth-sized, earth-like planet instead of a black hole as its motion had suggested, a mission was scrambled to investigate this most unusual of celestial behaviors.

Hamstrung by politics, and nearly crippled before it began, the 'Lone Ranger' mission was reduced to just one crew member and left to his own devices.

These are the logs of Arrow 18 and its lone commander. This information is classified TOP SECRET by the Global Space Agency.

Do NOT tell the princess.

Ganondorf, King of Thieves, Lord of Darkness, Master of Evil and Wielder of the Triforce of Power, had long since grown thoroughly and completely bored with the path the gods had decreed for his destiny.

Time after time it was always the same, try and unite the Triforce, plunge the world into darkness for a time, search out and then kidnap Princess Zelda, watch his minions be defeated one after another and then finally battle Link for supremacy. Rinse and repeat.

All the while knowing that regardless of winning or losing, that no matter what he did or didn’t do, that in the end everything would end up repeating itself in another time and place afterwards, again, and again and again, in an utterly pointless never ending cycle.

Having decided that enough was finally enough, and refusing to continue to be a simple pawn at the hands of the gods, he vowed he would find a way to escape from his cumbersome destiny, a way to start anew far beyond the meddling grasp of the gods, a way to reach a realm upon which he could be the master of his own fate.

And after years of careful planning he had finally succeeded.

Sure, the fact he had to drag the know-it-all Princess and the green obsessed Hero along for the ride for his plan to work was a minor inconvenience, but he knew that sometimes sacrifices had to be made. And the fact that this new realm apparently decided to turn him and his two unwilling companions into miniature pastel colored ponies upon arrival also wasn’t exactly part of the plan, but he could cope.

After all, that was a negligible price to pay in achieving his deepest wish: freedom.

In this story Ganondorf, having grown sick of following through the motions his destiny placed before him as the eternal bad guy to be defeated time after time, seeks out to escape from his fate by breaking through the void between dimensions and running away from Hyrule to another realm entirely, Equestria, all the while dragging both Link and Zelda along for the ride.

Arriving long before the founding of the country, back before the events of Heart’s Warming Eve and at the highest point of the conflict between the Three Tribes, he and his two new companions will have to deal with a whole new world and it’s wonders and dangers. All the while this new magical world will have to learn to deal with its three new strange inhabitants in kind.

Just a warning: This is NOT a Displaced fic. All three main characters are the actual characters from the Zelda series that have been taken to Equestria due to Ganondorf’s master plan, and not humans turned into them.

Beta Reader: The Amazing Emtu!
Cover Art: The Incredible swagmu!
Proofreader: The relentless TranquilClaws! (From chp I - XXV)

Featured for the first time! 07/06/2018 to 07/11/2018

Now with a TvTropes page!

Edit: Crossposting at Royalroad where I have the same username.

Hup is a changeling that occasionally suffers the hiccups. Caught in the act of shapeshifting at a young age, Chrysalis mistook his involuntary shapeshift as natural talent. As problems pop up, one after the other, Hup's going to find out that infiltrating Equestria will be the least of his troubles.

One of a series of gifts to my followers, specifically:
Listener and RadicalThestral

Rated E for weirdness.

This story is a sequel to The Eagle Has Landed

When President Nixon orders, you obey. And now that he wants Luna on the LM and heading home, how is Neil ever going to convince her to follow?
But it doesn't even get that far, as an innocent mistake endangers the mission.
And even as the mission is endangered, tensions are rising back on Earth. While the drama plays out in Mission Control, just what is going on behind the Iron Curtain?
No one knows, but it's certainly not conducive to Apollo 11's welfare.

Sequel here.

When Apollo 11 lands on the moon, Neil Armstrong utters his famous lines as his boots land in the lunar regolith, but when he turns around he finds something no one was expecting or had ever planned for.
There's an alien on the moon. And it's blue, four-legged, and staring at him.

Sequel here.

Shining Armor and Princess Cadence's marriage has become legend. However, the two were not always a couple. Learn how the famous lovers first met and the stunning lengths that the Princess of Love herself had to go to in order to get her destined beau's attention after years spent drifting apart while Shining served in the military.

Featured by The Royal Guard on 03/20/14! Twilight's Library Approved 03/24/14! EqD Featured 06/10/2014!

This story is written such that one does not need to have read Rites of Ascension beforehand to understand and enjoy it. However, one should know a few quick, easy things going in. First, Season Three and later do not exist in the Rites timeline, and second, Cadence is a winged unicorn rather than alicorn. Also, I'm aware the comics tackled this topic, but this is in my own AU, and I first wrote this more than a year ago. Consider this an alternate take on the idea. Other than that, you should be able to dive in with no problems.

That having being said, as this is a canon story in the Rites of Ascension Expanded Universe, reading the main story will make this one even more enjoyable.

The amazing artwork was done by my wife, the fantastically talented Violet Squiggles, whom I dedicate this work to. I love you, my darling, with all my heart. You are my everything.