Crossover with Untitled Goose Game. It's a lovely day in the village of Ponyville, and here is a horrible goose.
(Characters will be added to tags as they become relevant.)
Now with illustrations!
Chapters (2)
- Member Since 11th Oct, 2013
- offline last seen 7 hours ago
alarajrogers
Okay, I admit it, I'm probably not your mom. But odds are I'm old enough to be. Now with Patreon account (under alarajrogers) and short stories on Amazon (under Alara Rogers).
alarajrogers
Joined 11th Oct, 2013 ·
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...Would that include genre tags, too?
I'm totally looking forward to where this wackiness goes. There better be a rake in a lake by the end of this.
Oh noes, oh that...
Mild annoyance has come to town.
Me when I saw this story:
Bring it
This is sure to be magnificent in all the worst ways. Looking forward to it. And Fluttershy's reaction when she hears about the mayhem. Sure, at first she'll give the goose the benefit of the doubt. But as the evidence piles up...
I swear I can hear that little goosen's feet from here...
My partner is very depressed because their primary partner was arrested today for bullshit reasons.
They absolutely love the untitled Goose Game. I can’t wait to watch their face light up when I read this to them over video chat tonight.
i.ibb.co/bLQb6m7/goose.jpg
HONK!
I have not yet played Untitled Goose Game, it's top of my Christmas wishlist. Will this include spoilers for the game?
THE GOOSE
IS LOOSE
Aw man I love this game XD
Peace was never an option.
As someone who plays a lot of videogames and likes seeing how people interpret them in writing form, this first chapter already is an absolute treat. The way the prose flows and how you describe everything reminds me a lot of some of the books I used to read when I was younger - Paddington-esqe, for lack of a better term, and it feels like it fits the concept of UGG very well. Vivid and descriptive, but in a very... observant way, I guess I'd say? Which makes a lot of sense from the perspective of a goose looking to cause some mischief.
...maybe I'm overthinking this, now that I'm reading this comment over again, but hey, I gotta say what my brain is feeling.
Anyway, really excited to see where this goes next!
love how the to do list enforced the be nice to fluttershy rule.
Here comes the Mischievous Goose. Let's hope Ponyville is still standing by the end. And if not, ah well, they've rebuilt it before.
I guess someone had to do it, AJ is not going to like this!
Yes... Just, yes.
Should you not tag this with Crossover?
To do list for the goose:
Bother the heck out of these ponies
At the end, Twilight blasts the goose away, but appearing from the smoke is the same goose, unaffected... Only that it has Celestia's mane, a horn on its forehead, and wore a golden necklace & crown. It is the long forgotten princess herself... PRINCESS GOOSE!!!
Honk!
9888467
Thanks, this is awesome! How'd you do that?
HONK!!
9889179
https://untitled-goose-meme.glitch.me/
9888592
Depends on how you define "spoilers". I'm going to redefine game mechanics for prose and MLP universe (so, for example, the goose lifts a wing to see the to-do list; in game, you hit tab, or at least you do in the Epic version), and none of the puzzles will be identical. But thematically, there will be a lot of similarities between the stuff the goose pulls in the game and the stuff it pulls in this story, so it could definitely give you hints on strategy.
You've seen Estee's "Goosed!" story, right?
Two things...
1. Of course Fluttershy is off limits, she is just too nice to animals to be bothered by the Untitled Goose. She is characterized quite well and will likely become a point of conflict once this gets going.
2. How in the world did this game get so popular that in weeks we already have fanfiction for it on this site? I swear it blew up faster than most indie horror games that come out nowadays. It's probably Mini Ladd and Jack's fault.
Ah whatever, this will be fun regardless. I think this is worth it, the poor Apple Family is at the mercy of the Untitled Goose.
9889377
I have. That one is about the evils of Canadian geese (who I'm rendering as Yakyakistan geese for purposes of my MLP universe.) The goose from Untitled Goose Game is a domestic goose. They are slightly less evil, in part because it is very hard for them to fly, though I have seen video proving it's possible.
9889384
I think it succeeded on its own merits. It's a cartoony game where you wreak havoc as one of the northern hemisphere's top havoc-wreakers.
9889497
Your right and that's why everyone loves to play or watch it. It's just funny to watch.
I loved this, at first while reading I was a bit disappointed because there was a 'don't mess with Fluttershy' bit, and I immediately though "why not, it's THE goose, it does what it wants" But then I thought of it like a sequel or a spin off, with Fluttershy being sort of like a hub section, with healing and sort of just a breather area. Meaning higher stakes and bigger action! XD but really it made it feel like a second installment, which made up for that, and was genius.
I feel like the to do list could use a bit of work, in the game there's always one esoteric item, such as 'rake in the lake' so I was thinking it'd be interesting to replace "Make the apples fall on the ground, not in the barrel" with something like "Issac Newton" or something similar that relates to an apple falling.
As well "Make either the mare or the stallion miss the tree" can easily be "Make somepony miss the tree"
For "Lock the farm stallion in the barn" and "Take the farm mare’s hat" remove 'farm' since it's a bit more succinct that way.
Similarly "Roll a barrel of apples down the hill" can have 'of apples' removed.
And finally "Trip a pony with the mare’s lasso" you can take out "mare's"
Hopefully that came across more as helpful than nitpicky, I just love the simplicity of Goose Game, and want this fic to be on par in that regard, it's such an amazing idea and I regret not having it before you, XD
9889564
I think you're absolutely right regarding the to-do list and I feel like I should revise it.
As for Fluttershy... there is no one like Fluttershy living in a small village in England. Fluttershy can communicate with animals and is well known throughout the Everfree as the place to go for food, care, help finding a mate... so I think it would be fair to assume that geese have a standing goose-internal-rule to not mess with Fluttershy.
Besides, I dunno how far in the game you've played, but (refers to pub level):
You can't do anything to the pub ladies. You perform for them, they give you a flower. You can't take it, you can't upset them... they'll look for you if you come through with the bell, but you can't hassle them personally. So I think the game establishes that there can be categories of people who are nice to the goose and therefore the goose doesn't mess with them.
Alondro eye-narrows at the goose, "I've dealt with your kind before... crapping all over sidewalks... scaring away ducks... fouling our formerly clean cedar lakes..." Infects the goose with transgenic bird flu.... which also wipes out 15% of all life forms with lungs... but at least the goose was cooked! SUPER EFFECTIVE!! GOAL ACHIEVED!!
9889589
I know the game inside and out, don't worry about spoilers for me specifically (though it's good for others reading) The thing is though that in the game there's nobody that you're specifically told not to mess with, that's what i was getting at. And as you, the player, would you accept ever being told you can't do something? no, XD of course not, you're a goose, you defy rules and honk infinitely while walking around in a circle beside who you're told not to mess with.
Honestly it's fine, it's your story and I won't tell you to change it, I do like what you've done after all. If I were to do this story though, I probably would have had the Goose figure out why not to mess with Fluttershy during it's interaction with her, instead of being told from the get go. So it'd start with a single item on the todo list, or not one at all, and the goose is like "WTF, mate" but goes along with it and meets Fluttershy, attempts to be annoying, and learns that the yellow pony is not only patient, but nice and likes the goose. Then the conversation happens and the goose, refreshed at meeting a pony that's worth it's time, goes on to torment the foolish mortal farmer that aren't best pony like the yellow one.
But that's just me, XD
I've never played that game (nor even heard of it), but I'm guessing that goose (or is it a gander?) is going to be a complete dick.
9889690
It's never described as anything other than a goose, but in addition to being the feminine that's also the generic (kind of like dog is both the generic and masculine term for the animal, and then bitch is specifically female), so it's up to the reader what gender the goose is. We never see it with another goose, so there's no way to guess whether it's male or female.
It does like flowers and pretty ribbons, though, so if it's a gander, it's very confident in its own masculinity. :-)
And yes. The goose is a dick.
So excited about this. I can't wait to find out who the colt with the glasses is.
Oh man, I just realized what the model village translates too. But object can the goose steal from the cutie map?
9889690
To give you the best example of what the game is, its the game's tagline:
That alone is exactly what the game is all about.
Oh my gosh, this is exactly what I needed after the series finale/end of MLP
Some untitled Goose game placed in the world of MLP, this is brilliant and random and hilarious
I love how from the moment that the goose saw Fluttershy, they were like "Yep, it's official. She's off limits"XD Oh my gosh, that is too funnyXD I also love how the list thing is still a thing with the goose, maybe the reason why he can't fly is because he's a magic goose and summoning the list is part of his magic;) Lol, they're probably not but why not "theorize" about this?;) XD I wouldn't be surprised if Discord created this little troll;)XD Maybe that's why he's magic and why Fluttershy is off limits;)XD Lol! Either way, an interaction between this goose and Discord will be just a hootXD I was hoping that the next pony that the goose meets after Fluttershy would be either Twilight or ApplejackXD And ooooohhh boooyyyy, our goosey friend is going to cause soooo much chaos at the farmXD And there's so much that goosey can do at the farm that it could take up two chapters worth essentiallyXD Lol! I can't wait for there to be fanfic readings of this story^^!
My only critique for this story is to have some read over it and help you break up your long sentences and make those sentences shorter. You also need to use more commas & other punctuations to help break up your long sentences. You also need to separate the character's dialogue from the big action and/or description paragraph so that way it's easier for the readers to read and process the dialogue. The dialogue for Fluttershy needs a bit more polishing and again her sentences need to be broken up & thus be shorter. I'm bringing these points up because these are things I struggle with too, believe meXD
Keep up the good work and I can't wait for the next chapter^^<3!
9889564
Oh that's a great idea, I love the idea of Fluttershy's place be like a healing center for the goose:D That should totally be in the story:D It'll be a fun way to make this story different from the Untitled Goose game since the original game doesn't have that feature.
soo, the goose has a magical to-do list and Fluttershy is off limits.
Smells like Discord's behind this.
I am HERE FOR THIS.
X'D
9889564
Updated to-do list because your suggestions made more sense.
Honk Honk
If that asshole goose came to my town, he'd be quartered, sectioned, dipped in egg batter and deep-fried to a golden, crispy brown. Crunchy on the outside, tender and juicy on the inside, with sweet-and-sour sauce for dipping.
Maybe wash him down with a nice pale ale or a pilsner.
...now I'm hungry. When's lunch?