Pav actually wrote something! Twilestia fans rejoice! · 4:29pm Oct 9th, 2015
So as long-time fans (you fools) have undoubtedly been aware, my writing progress has been slipping as of late. Some of it has been due to the usual "boo hoo I have a 9-5 job", but frankly, a lot of it chalked up to self-esteem issues. I was full of self-doubts and insecurity, taking 10,000+ word drafts and trashing them because they didn't measure up to my own impossible standards. At this point, I need to thank all my friends—in particular Skwerl, Ferret, Core joe? Co-ray-ho?, and Jax—for their constant praise and encouragement, offering their own stories of difficulty and adversity, and in general convincing me that I'm not a poopybutt.
Jaxie, whom you all may know better as the author of Would It Matter If I Strangled Everyone Who Wrote Another Damn Spinoff?, in particular came to me with an interesting proposal and I said yes. He pointed out that I had recently been subjecting myself to heavy, heady topics, in fics like All of It, for Her (*cough* recently featured by Titty Dragon and by The Royal Guard) and Thesis (<error comment not found>). All this high-brow stuff was getting myself wound too tightly. Why not take Thesis's shipping, and play with that in a more fun and irreverent environ?
And this suggestion got me thinking. I mean, I was thinking about his suggestion, to be sure. But I was also thinking about Jax himself and his writing process. He read Perfect for Me, saw that it was missing something important, and so he wrote I Forgot I Was There. He read Harmony, saw that it was missing something important, and wrote Siren Song and Daring Do.
My path was clear. In order to be a sucessful writer, I needed to steal a concept from Jax and improve it ten times over so that I could rub it in his face. It's the perfect crime, and my timing only adds to the irony. But which fic to improve, and how?
Modern Medicine was a fic of Jax's where an older version of Twilight arrives from the future with a terrible warning. The world is about to be overrun by an epidemic, for which older Twilight provides a cure, although younger Twilight questions her motives. It's this really introspective story about causality and time loops, various philosophical schools of ethical thinking, what it is like to walk in our forebearer's hoofsteps bla bla bla omg tl;dr. The story has a massive flaw. If future Twilight traveled back in time thousands of years...
CiG, I cannot ask for your forgiveness, only for your mercy.
...why didn't she take the opportunity to aggressively hit on the younger version of her lover, Celestia?
Celestia's morning has been difficult enough, between hearing Twilight's confession of love, and then breaking her heart as gently as possible. Mere moments later, her private chambers are rocked by the shockwaves of a time-traveling spell. This marks the arrival of Celestia's alleged lover from five thousand years in the future, Princess Twilight Sparkle—or as she insists on Celestia referring to her, Glitter-Flanks.
Armed with thousands of years of knowledge of which buttons to push and how to make her squirm, Glitter-Flanks has traveled back to this date for one singular purpose: to establish the closed time loop that sets the two of them up as a couple.
I blame Pav.
Also, more Thesis pls
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You merely issued the blame. I was born in it, molested by it.
3454982 Yet you don't deny you reveled in every second of it.
I saw this! And I can't wait to read it
A hearty diet of celestia and twilight is recommended by leading doctors, you know.
Hey hey hey, you're not allowed to do that! Not until at least I get to read them! You're robbing me of good reading, it's unfair. I demand you send all doomed stories my way before trashing. You must comply. Or else I will bug you for eternity.
(You dont want to test me on that one)
Definitely going to give that story a read when I have an hour or two to spare.
This is the one you were taunting me with, isn't it? <.< On a scale of 0 to -10, how much will I hate it?
Pav no
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This is that! While I was hemming and hawing about poking you, I ultimately decided to just go ahead and publish since I've been polishing this turd on and off for... wow, 5 months. Also, if you left like 200 comments of things that needed fixing, I srsly might cri.
This is the million dollar question, is it not? Just for you, Prefect-sama, I shall provide a Twilestia trigger warning list. Obviously like all trigger lists, this carries some significant spoilers, so avoid this list unless this particular pairing is a concern for you.
- Arguably this is The Point of the story, but there's a reversed power dynamic between Glitter-Flanks and Celestia, with Glitter-Flanks teasing and knocking her off her rhythm.
- That does include some teasing about the age gap / former student relationship, though most of the other teasing is of the eyebrow-wiggling and nuzzling variety.
- Serious discussion about the effect of a closed time loop involved in this story.
- Most likely the worst offender, present-day Twilight in lingerie, adorkably hitting on Celestia, to an apprehensive reaction.
- Nevertheless, a sentimental ending.
For a PP rating, I guess I'd say a -5 or -6? You'll probably be squirming at the worst offender bit unless you can manage to laugh along, but I'm hoping that the fic as a whole has enough self-awareness and sentimentality that you can make it through. All the same, I won't hate you if you pass.
So Twilight, an old alicorn, travels back thousands of years to hit on Celestia.
Is this granny porn
Because I am not okay with granny porn.
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Totally.
Rood.
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This is super gross and I'm gonna read it while eating lemons.
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Let's hear it for Pav not hating me! :V
3455653
I said I wouldn't hate you, not that I wouldn't silently judge you.
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You're judging me any harder than I am judging you. :V
*checks author description after reading My Little Chrono Trigger and checks out A Fork in Time*
...is that another FFXI player I see?
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NO YOU CAN'T HAVE REFRESH LEAVE ME ALONE >:(
I think you're actually the first person to get that reference, hee.
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It's OK, it's OK. I merited Dia III. :)
(RDM 75 first account, I main THF 99 nowadays on Ragnarok.)
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Nice! I had a handful of 75's... what, like, RDM PLD DRG PLD SCH DNC? Heh, played way too much of that game. Stopped playing during WotG tho, so never hit the 99 cap.
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Fortunately, Square-Enix cannot cast a "Want it-Need it" spell on their servers, so you're safe if you wanna be.
...if not, you'd have a 99 in no time and be gearing up shortly with a friendly LS afterwards. Heh heh heh....