1. Member Since 25th Jan, 2012
  2. offline for 21h, 9m

Corejo


A good story isn't measured by how long it is, but by how long it stays with you.


The Cool Kids' Lunch Table

790 members follow Corejo

Corejo follows 22 members

My Sad Stories

  • Transcendence Scootaloo learns the wonders of flight. by Corejo 66,282 words · 10,757 views · 714 likes · 38 dislikes
  • Lyrid The Muse searches for lost love. by Corejo 2,251 words · 1,063 views · 116 likes · 4 dislikes

My Happy/Comedy Stories

  • The Night Mare's Nightmare Night Nightmare Luna fights politics to save Nightmare Night. by Corejo 19,824 words · 2,510 views · 150 likes · 7 dislikes
  • Reading Rainbow When Twilight is admitted to the Ponyville hospital, Rainbow Dash is there for her. by Corejo 7,354 words · 43,135 views · 3,441 likes · 51 dislikes
  • Working as Intended Twilight casts a spell that doesn't turn out as planned. by Corejo 4,943 words · 3,297 views · 208 likes · 9 dislikes
  • Sprinkles Twilight and Pinkie Pie bake cupcakes. by Corejo 3,073 words · 2,424 views · 206 likes · 3 dislikes
  • Lyra vs. Goldfish Lyra eats a Goldfish. by Corejo 1,478 words · 1,923 views · 123 likes · 3 dislikes

My Dark Stories

  • For the Benefit of Mr. Kite Twilight seeks freedom from the web of spells woven by a pony hell bent on her destruction. by Corejo 50,390 words · 1,314 views · 75 likes · 16 dislikes
  • Darkness Beckons Twilight descends into nightmare. by Corejo 7,618 words · 1,085 views · 37 likes · 2 dislikes

Stuff I Really Like

  • Grossly Incandescent Thrust headlong into a strange new world, Solaire of Astora must make amends before he can continue with his mission. Unbeknownst to them all, a shadow from his past approaches. by Crack Javelin 59,370 words · 10,411 views · 1,746 likes · 28 dislikes
  • The Glass Blower A young artist in love will do whatever it takes to satisfy his heart. by Cold in Gardez 10,489 words · 12,476 views · 964 likes · 20 dislikes
  • Naked Singularity Twilight attempts to write a sensual romance novel. by Cold in Gardez 10,524 words · 51,571 views · 2,532 likes · 45 dislikes
  • A Wake of Mist and Flame A day in the life of Princess Celestia, as seen through the eyes of one of her guards. by heliopause 13,730 words · 3,931 views · 572 likes · 8 dislikes
  • Somewhere Only We Know Every night, in a little stable just outside of town, an old mare lays down to sleep. Every night she has the same dream of rainbows and open sky... by PatchworkPoltergeist 4,721 words · 9,223 views · 638 likes · 14 dislikes

Other Stuff I Like

  • An Imaginative Performance Apple Bloom pretends the play she's in is actually happening. by Bob From Bottles 24,548 words · 1,210 views · 116 likes · 0 dislikes
  • A Game of Twits Fluttershy and Twilight enter a chess tournament to pay off a debt by Cassius 7,699 words · 5,537 views · 175 likes · 8 dislikes
  • The Contest Fluttershy returns to defend her title as Quiet Game world champion. by Cold in Gardez 6,714 words · 31,362 views · 1,639 likes · 24 dislikes
  • For Those We Left Behind When Twilight's mother passes away unexpectedly, she reflects on a parent she neglected. by Drakmire 5,514 words · 7,429 views · 451 likes · 7 dislikes
  • Not All Who Wander Are Lost Scootaloo embarks on a quest to bring her fallen idol back to the land of the living by RazedRainbow 91,785 words · 8,829 views · 528 likes · 10 dislikes
Apr
20th
2015

So as some of you know, I announced the workings of a sequel to Transcendence and whatnot.  I had posted a link to the prologue in a previous blog as a 'sorry I was a butt and purposefully timed the announcement with April Fools,' but I figured it needed a more official announcement.  I added it as a bonus chapter to Transcendence, which you can find here.

For those of you interested in my thoughts on Transcendence, please read on (obvious spoilers).  If not, skip to the end for something that will surely put a smile on your face.


Transcendence.  It's a neat topic.  Rising from some position, whether physical or metaphorical, to achieve another of higher merit in the face of adversity.  The ultimate test of one's worth, to succeed despite the odds.  I explored it in Transcendence to a major degree through the ScootaDash relationship, and I do have to say I feel that i succeeded on the physical front.  Scootaloo gets kicked to the curb, stands back up, shakes off the mud, and then puts her nose to the grindstone to prove her worth.  She succeeds by winning the Wonderbolts tryouts, but again, only physically.

As so many people were more than happy to complain about, she failed to transcend on the metaphorical level.  She beat Rainbow Dash, but by kicking her to the curb in turn, she became no better than her.  I get that, I own it, I never denied it.  I hate saying it, but this fact is more a consequence of the changes I put the fic through when I stopped for the first rewrite.  (Veteran readers will remember this one as the one where I cut out the Scootaloo suicide/Tycho-fights-off-a-manticore thing.  God I'm so glad I got rid of that.)  The original intention was that, yes, Rainbow Dash did only shove Scootaloo aside so that she would push herself to excel on her own.  

[I should probably interject here that Transcendence was my first story.  Ever.  I set about with the intention of writing a three-part story, totaling around 30k words.  (I likened the setup to be like Off the Edge of the Map, for some reason.)  That quickly spiralled out of control, and we got, for the most part, what you see today.  (This, I might add, is why we have the ham-fisted sappiness of Tycho’s backstory and the cliche everything to do with Mrs. Meterstick.  Don’t confuse this statement with disliking Tycho; I love his character, and his backstory stuff is central to the story.  It’s just the execution could have been done better had I been more experienced back then.)]

Back to the topic, some people were happy.  Others weren't.  I made my decision, and I stand by it—which gives us the current setup wherein Rainbow Dash legit threw her aside.

But that still left the reasons for doing so.  This far into the story, I had already set in stone so many things that I couldn't retcon (because nobody likes a retconner, even though I'm being hypocritical with that statement).  To be honest, that set up the ending to pretty much be the trainwreck that it is.

Not a bad trainwreck, mind you.  With the direction it was ultimately forced to go, I decided to steer it down a different path than most would probably have agreed with: hard realism.

Sometimes people do and say shit that hurts, and after all is said and done, the holes are too deep to fill.  

Relationships crash and burn in real life.  Why do you think so many marriages end in divorce?  Murder?  Real life sucks sometimes, and some people aren’t equipped to handle certain situations.

While Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo were never married, nor did they murder each other, they still followed this general path.  Rainbow Dash had no idea what to do after Scootaloo failed (her backstory on her reasons that you guys don’t know yet withstanding), and therefore lashed out.  Repeatedly?  People do that.  It’s happened to me.

But that’s just Dashie.  Where’s Scootaloo in all this?  Where’s her Transcendence?

That, I’ll admit, I dropped the ball on.  You see, for as much all of you were chomping at the bit over Dashie’s OOC and whatnot, loathing her every move because of what she did to Scootaloo, well… so was I.

Somehow, my own writing colored my opinion on Dashie, and that lead to seeking the IN YOUR FUCKING FACE, DASHIE ending more than I should have.  In hindsight, there was middle ground that I could have stood on—should have stood on—but my feelings at the time of writing were too forefront in my mind to see it.  In retrospect, it does a wonderful job of portraying the inverse of the moral, a fact alafreo was wise to point out.

But where there’s flaw there’s room for perfection.  The hearts that I’ve broken and the good endings that I’ve shattered have left us with a beautiful mosaic on the floor for us to rearrange into something greater.

So what’s that leave us?  A broken Dashie and a Scootaloo that doesn’t give a flying fuck about the hurt she’s caused.  She knows she did it, ala the heaviness in her heart in the final scene, but she doesn’t care.  It was worth it to her in some way.  Though she didn’t care about Rainbow Dash anymore, there wasn’t apathy.  And even though she will never look back, the path forward can just as easily coil in on itself.

To that point, I want to direct you guys to a comment left by a guy named CraftAids, because not only did he leave one of the most scathing opinions on the ending, but he really hit the nail of my feelings on the head:

"Time will do what Dash'es words could not.">> Cold in Gardez

And that is the weakness here. Maybe Rainbow dash should suffer, but the problem is not that Scootaloo should never forgive Rainbow Dash, it is that Scootaloo will never get the chance to choose to forgive her. When she was given a chance to relent, Rainbow instead issued a challenge on the pretense that Scootaloo would deserve the treatment she was given unless she won. When Scootaloo did her lightning tornado trick, the glowing column was a massive middle finger and the victory was domination. So, coming back now and saying she is sorry was Rainbow Dash trying to back out of their arrangement. Rainbow not only proved that she only stands by those who are not a risk, she proved that she will try to back out of her own losses instead of owning up.

When Scootaloo needed her, Rainbow cast her aside. But Rainbow will be forgiven all the same. She made a huge mistake, but time closes all wounds. In the end, Scootaloo not only made a childish decision, but no one will learn a thing from it. They will simply both live in jaded pain because when Rainbow needed her, Scootaloo cast her aside. No, I don't think that Scoot should simply take Rainbow back, but I do think that words should be said and that Scoot is the only one who can say them, but she chose to hurt Rainbow instead.

And so, as you said, there is a new found heaviness in her chest. It is one she does not want which she will hold forever, and she chose to claim it. The idea that she manages to hold onto that forever, that she and rainbow exchange their elongated betrayals and "fuck you"s and then leave each other faithless and scarred, is not only a tragedy, it's near impossible. How, tell me how, is it possible that Scootaloo spent the rest of her life feeling that weight in her chest, and she never looked back, never even tried to figure out why?

This lack of faith will affect all of her relationships with everyone in the future. It is a huge part of her life and will be a part of her decision making process forever. And one day, when the pure poison has left Scoot’s veins, Rainbow dash will still hold Scoot and the treatment of Scoot as her greatest mistake, the single complete failure, in Rainbow's entire life. When this happens, Rainbow will slink back into her life. Rainbow will be a mean, apologetic, self loathing mess when in Scoot's presents or thinking about Scoot, no matter how hard she tries to act like everything is all right. Are you really saying that Scoot and Dash will take this and they will never make it into something new? Are you really saying that after playing perfectly by everyone else’s impossible rules and winning, Scoot will live her life in spite? Are you really saying that Scootaloo and Rainbow are both completely and totally incapable of Transcendence?

What I am telling you is that your story isn't over. Even if she doesn't look back, your story isn't over. If she manages to hold onto that pain, there is a story of utter cruelty and masochism to tell. If she is forced to forgive by the hands of time, there is a very unfortunate tale of very unfortunate and un-convicted mares and their tragic flaws. If she manages to learn the meaning of the weight in her chest, there is a story of transcendence waiting for an end. Now, how about you write some more fics, live some more life, bounce some more ideas in your head, and if someday you feel like it maybe you can make this story's title fit.

These angles, essentially, are what I will be addressing with the sequel.  Willingly.  Not as pandering.  Not as a fix fic.

As closure.

This story deserves more than I left it with.  And I can’t wait to again feel my way though this world I’ve created.

On that note, I’ll be getting back to writing.  Hope you all understand what I felt while writing this story and that this post wasn’t too rambly.

As always,

Onward and Upward.


P.S. For those that skipped, or those just finishing the above...


Smile:

Isn't she just the cutest?

Corejo · 146 views · Report · Story: Transcendence
  • Viewing 21 - 25 of 25
#25 · 8w, 1h ago · · ·

Thanks for adding 'Sins of the Fathers' to your read lists!  :)

#24 · 10w, 4d ago · · ·

>>1653933

I'm part of the Seattle's Angels, the group that featured you yesterday on the site post.  I wasn't a part of this round, but I do look at what the others feature, and your fic piqued my interest.

That said, I do tend to read slowly, as my days are pretty full up and most of my pony time I put toward writing.  But I'll get to it eventually.

#23 · 10w, 4d ago · · ·

Thank you for adding my story to your Library. It sounds like an ironic name for a read-it-later list, so I hope you get around to reading mine.

#22 · 14w, 5d ago · · ·

Wow, it's been a long time since anypony's commented here. Anyway, I really like this quote:

A good story isn't measured by how long it is, but by how long it stays with you.

Have a great day! :pinkiehappy:

#21 · 57w, 4d ago · · ·

>>1057441 Coolio! Looks good.:pinkiehappy:

  • Viewing 21 - 25 of 25
Login or register to comment