Random Fic Reviews · 4:51am Feb 10th, 2014
I always try to make comments on the fics I read, and now I’ve decided to go ahead and share those fics by briefly reviewing them. I’ll post a bunch whenever I decide I have enough to make a post, chosen from basically whatever I've read lately. No direct links for Mature stories, but I’ll still name them and link the author, so they shouldn’t be hard to find. Also, I've begun writing Darkfic reviews for the Pleasant Commentator and Review Group, and apparently people like those.
From Failing Hooves (Everyone) (3/30/2015 — Story Deleted)
by Viola Velvet
This one was okay, but not great. The opening felt a bit out-of-character for both Twilight and Celestia, and had nothing to do with the rest of the story. Having Star Swirl linger on as he does was an interesting idea, and it seemed to be heading in a good direction, but then the conclusion is just too simple and easy. I just have trouble believing that over the course of 1,000 years, Twilight is the first student to understand that Friendship is literally Magic, or that it was so easy for Star Swirl to change after so long.
Territory (Mature, Sex)
by Idiotcornball
If you’re okay with anthro and like futa, you should probably read this. If you also happen to like sounding, you should absolutely read this. That last fetish isn’t exactly one I’m into, but idiotcornball puts a unique spin on it. I already knew he was a great clop author from his humanized futa series that began with “Something Extra”, and this is the level of work I’ve come to expect from him.
Spunk Science (Mature, Sex)
by the parasprite
The first chapter is up so far, and it’s hilarious if you have a sufficiently juvenile sense of humor. Drunk ponies and a surprisingly perverse Pinkie Pie abound.
Fluttershy Gets Featured on the Cover of a Playcolt Magazine (Teen, Sex)
by NightWolf289
This one disappointed me, to be honest.
The idea of Fluttershy being exposed in the way the title suggests could make for either great comedy or drama. However, by the time I read the second “proposition”, I realized we were in a “comedic mix-up” plot.
I’m tired of this plot. In part because it’s over-done, and in part because it relies on very forced and stilted dialogue to keep everything ambiguous. I can’t believe for a second Big Macintosh would spend two paragraphs skirting around the topic and vaguely describing his problem instead of just saying “Mornin’, Miss Fluttershy. Mind helpin’ me with a snake I found in the orchard?”
Long story short: This fic, like pretty much everything else that uses this plot, just tries too hard.
GET AWAY FROM MY PEACE FARMS! (Mature, Gore)
by The Psychopath
A crossover with The Peacekeeper. This idea has potential, and I’m probably going to steal it at some point, but here it was done in just about the least interesting way. It’s essentially a play-through of The Peacekeeper, except PK’s name is Twilight, and the soldiers he blows away are Changelings. I don’t think we quote game dialogue word-for-word, but it wasn’t far off.
P is for Topless! (Teen)
by Bysen
(Human) Pinkie Pie raises a stir when she fails to dress for the occasion and doesn’t understand what’s everyone’s problem is. One of the funnier things I’ve read lately.
After Dark (Mature, Gore)
by Midnight Radio Hotline
A rather odd little story that explores nightmares and then goes for the stinger ending. Personally, I didn’t care much for it. Some of the things it tries to do just fall flat (like any of the “running” sections), and it simply wasn’t very scary.
Best Friends Forever (Everyone)
by Obselescence
One of those Obs stories that toys with the dynamic between Twilight and Celestia while asking questions about immortality and ethics. Not the most amazing thing he’s ever done, but it will make you think, but I think that’s par for the course with an Obselescence story.
Into The Darkness (Mature, Sex)
by The Abyss
"The things I do to get off..." is probably the funniest line I've read today, particularly considering it came from Twilight Sparkle. Like clop? Read it. Like tentacles? A must-read.
Daring Do and the Golden Shower (Teen, Sex)
by Samey90
Saw this in my feed and went “wat”. I have a couple Mature groups in my feed, so clopfics aren’t exactly an unusual sight, but the watersports fetish is definitely less common. And then I saw it was rated Teen and said, “Alright, how dumb is it?” Well, it’s the exact same joke as Fluttershy Gets Featured because everyone makes that joke. “Innuendo, innuendo, innuendo, innuendo.. IT WASN’T INNUENDO AT ALL, WAS IT STEVE?! NOW WHOSE MIND IS IN THE GUTTER?!” The only difference is, for all the lazy and overused humor in it, Fluttershy Gets Featured was well-written. As predictable and trite as a Garfield comic, maybe, but well-done. This one plays the same notes, but has enough spelling and grammar mistakes to be a distraction. At least the dialogue wasn't as forced.
Ponies come to Earth, and a non-brony gets Pinkie Pie as a roommate. This one is weird. Not the concept - I have HIE and POE alike in my projects folder (they’re all clop, for the record) - but because Drax makes various changes to the ponies for reasons that seem entirely arbitrary. The distraction of the unexplained changes is bad enough, but on top of that, the first-person narrator lacks a unique voice. He’s a random jaded retail drone who’s kind of an okay guy I guess. I can’t connect with him at all. We’re left relying on Pinkie antics and toilet humor for our entertainment.
Twilight the pussy cat (Mature, Sex) (3/30/2015 — Story Deleted)
by jake-n-blake
A magical accident leaves Twilight thinking she’s a housecat. Anon, our first-person HIE narrator, takes advantage of this fact to fuck her.
Yeah, even if it wasn’t a terribly-written HIE clopfic with no grasp of grammar or formatting (and basically a rapefic, at that), I’d be downvoting this one for it’s depiction of Pinkie. Not that the other characters are much better, but I have to draw a line at calling her “the town retard,” among other things.
New Pains and Old Regrets (Teen)
by Pump It Up
500 years later, Spike still has a lingering crush on Rarity, and Twilight is suicidal after losing all of her friends? Sometimes sadfics enrage me. Let’s ignore the idea that Spike, now an adult (you know, as opposed to a child nurturing a foalhood crush), still pines after a mare who died centuries ago. And that he refuses to live more than one house away from Twi, or still behaves exactly as he did on the show. Let’s just look at Twilight. In fact, just at the idea that she can’t handle losing all her friends that way.
She still has Celestia.
She still has Spike.
She still has Cadance.
She still has Luna.
Hell, she still has Discord. I think after a few centuries, they’ll learn to get along.
And that’s assuming she doesn’t just make new friends, or stay close to the families of her old ones. You know, Princess of Magic in a setting where Friendship is Magic and all. You might think she has a knack for friendship. Never mind her responsibilities.
Sorry, but I’ve seen exactly one Twilight suicide fic that felt justified, and that’s this one: The Last Report (Everyone)
Interesting that I never heard of this review of my old story.