Rainbow Dash lives an exciting life and is swiftly becoming the most daring, awesome pegasus in all of Equestria. She would gladly give it all up, though, just to confess her love to Applejack.
“You're a real life saver, y'know that?” A pony with ravishing blonde locks said, grinning from ear to ear in the desert sun. “Appleloosa would be in the pits if it weren't for such speedy-quick deliveries!”
“Yes, well...” Rainbow Dash finished unpacking the last crate of salt-licks from her chariot and handed the earth pony the clipboard. “Service with a smile goes the long mile with Banner Company.”
“Wowsers!” The pony glanced up in mid-signature. “Is that yer jingle?”
Rainbow blinked, then forced a cheesy smile as she took the clipboard back. “It is now.”
“Shazaam... Well, if you dun gimme hope for the cityfolk back east!” A charming laugh. “Y'all should stay and rest up at the salt bar! Celestia knows it's an awful long flight home!”
“Sorry, but I don't salt-lick while on the job.” Rainbow tucked the clipboard away in her yellow apron. “Anywho. Gotta jet. It's been a real pleasure, ma'am.”
“Sir.”
Rainbow blinked. “Huh?”
The pony chuckled and smiled bashfully. “The name's 'Braeburn,' and don't y'all fret none, it happens a lot.” Eyelashes fluttered.
Rainbow squinted and squinted some more. “...Yeahhhhhh...” Seconds dripped by. Clearing her throat, she turned around. “Time to go. Enjoy your salt licks.”
“Y'all come back now!”
“Thank you.” Rainbow trotted up to her chariot, muttering out the side of her muzzle. “I won't.”
She hitched herself to the wagon, flapped her wings, and took off from the arid landscape.
“Let's see...” She glanced over her shoulder. “Hrmmff... one package left. It's a small one. Where the heck am I supposed to take this thing?” In mid-flight, she reached into an apron pocket and pulled out a list. “Hrmmmmmm...” Her ruby eyes twitched, and she winced. “You gotta be friggin' kidding me...”
The pegasus rolled her eyes into the wind, banked east, and soared towards the vaporous horizon.
The doorbell to the Carousel Boutique rang with four elegant notes.
Rainbow Dash leaned back, fidgeting on numb hooves.
“Nnnngh... c-can't friggin' wait for this paycheck...” She glanced down at the package in her hooves. “This thing's so light. What could Rarity have ordered, anyways?”
“Just a minuttttte!” a voice sing-songed from beyond the door.
“Brbrbrbrbrbrrr...” Rainbow exhaled, wings drooping. “Be still, my inner vampire hunter...”
The door slid open, and Rarity stood before the front stoop. She wore glasses and had a length of measuring tape hanging over her neck. At the sight of her close friend, she smiled elegantly. “Oh! Rainbow Dash! How delightful a surprise!”
“Hey hey, Rarity.”
“Oh! And what's this?” Rarity cupped a dainty hoof against her cheek. “You're delivering a package to yours truly?”
“Yeah. I work for Banner Company. Remember?”
“As a matter of fact, I do believe it's occurred to me,” Rarity said. “Oh, how I do admire your hard working ethics.” She sniffed the air between them, then blinked. “That... that musk. Have you been out to the desert?”
“Yeah. I had to make a trip out to Appleloosa. Say... do you remember any of the ponies we met there?”
“Should I have?”
“Right, glad we could agree on something.” Rainbow hoofed the package forward. “Here ya go. If you wouldn't mind signing for this—”
“Why the hurry, Rainbow, dear?” Rarity smiled. “You must be terribly exhausted from such an extensive flight! Why not come in and rest a while in the blissful air conditioning?”
“I-I really just wanna get my work done, Rarity. Thanks, though—”
“But... it's so late in the day!” Rarity blinked. “Surely you don't have another shipment to make!”
“Uhhhhh—”
“Well?”
“As a matter of fact... uhm...” Rainbow gulped. “This is my last delivery of the day. Funny that you should—”
“Splendid! Then you can certainly afford a breather!”
“Nnnngh... Rarity...”
“Uh uh uh!” Rarity tugged Rainbow inside with a pulse of magic. “I insist! Besides, it will give us the chance to catch up!”
Despite her inner grumblings, Rainbow didn't have the strength to protest. Her wings were as perky as ever, but her legs and knees were a stumbling mess. When Rarity slid over a stool, Rainbow Dash easily relented, slumping down with a sigh.
“How about some water, darling?”
“Water... actually sounds pretty swell.” Rainbow bore a weak smile. “Thanks, Rarity. I mean really.”
“Don't mention it.” Rarity winked as she returned with a glass and a pitcher. “You know, an athletic lifestyle requires constant hydration. It'd be a shame for you to dry out and shrivel up before finally landing a position in the Wonderbolts.”
“Uhhhh... the Wonderbolts. Right.” Rainbow smiled nervously and took a ship.
“Mmmm... ehhhh...” Rarity took a moment to stare at Rainbow, grimacing. “Do tell... is that apron a personal choice, my dear?”
“Mmmmfff...” Rainbow gulped down the water and exhaled. “Goddess, no. I have to buck myself in the flank each day to keep myself from ripping the darn thing to shreds.”
“That must be intolerably taxing,” Rarity said. “To be imprisoned in such a dreadful smock as a mandatory element of your profession.”
“Yeah, well, it's worth it for the bits.”
“Dare I ask, are you starving for funds at the moment, Rainbow?”
“Uhhhhhhh...” Rainbow squirmed, avoiding the unicorn's gaze. “No. What g-gives you that idea?” She cleared her throat. “And, y'know—not to be a jerkwad or anything—but even if that was the case, I don't see how it's—”
Rarity laughed airily. “Oh, I most definitely do not wish to pry, dear. I may not exactly be upfront about it, but I do care terribly about you. I just know how opposed you are to outward show of affection.”
“Erm...” Rainbow coughed and drowned herself in another glass of water. “Mmmff... yeahhhh.”
“But, let's not dwell on that!” Rarity trotted happily across the Boutique. “It's such a pleasure having you around. And... well... hmmm-hmmm-hmmm...”
Rainbow lowered the glass and raised an eyebrow. “What are you chuckling about?”
“Well, it's just that you're here,” Rarity said. “And, as it so happens, I've been hoping for a while now that I'd have the opportunity to... well... to show you something.”
“To show me what?”
“Oh, just a little something I've been working on.” Rarity gleefully smiled before offering a conspiratorial wink. “For a mare who's been harboring a little something of her own.”
“Huh?” Rainbow Dash winked. Her ears went flat. “Wait...”
“Hmmmmm...” Rarity struggled to contain a gleeful squeal. “You've been an elusive mare as of late, Rainbow Dash, but we're your friends. So, certainly you can forgive us for seeing through you. It's okay. Despite our gossiping nature, we've not let the good news spread beyond the walls of our own homes.”
“Rarity, I... I don't know what you think you know, but—”
“Shhhh!” Rarity trotted up to a curtained-off section of the Boutique. “Save it for after you've tasted of this divine spectacle! I know you may be reticent to approve at first, but—trust me—he is going to absolutely love it!”
Rainbow's eyes bulged. “'He?!'”
Swissssh! The curtains parted.
“Ta-daaaaaaa!” Rarity squee'd. “Isn't it positively ravishing?!”
Rainbow's muzzle dropped. She face-hoofed so hard that she nearly fell off her stool. “Oh for buck's sake...”
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...What?
Whatwhatwhatwhatwhat? I wanna know!!
Why do they think she has a clotfriend? LOL :D
Oh frick.
Buck off, Rares. Please. just go.
4659177 Fuck that. I can see where they are coming from... Thing is, how do they even know who it is, let alone that it's a "he"?
Having a faulty gaydar in Rarity's profession must be a bitch.
I... I approve of this, I think. This is my headcanon now. Okay, cool.
So Rarity thinks that Rainbow Dash has a boyfriend and/or is engaged and/or is pregnant. Fun!
I wonder who it is Rarity suspects? And what the heck did she make for RD in the first place to get that strong a reaction? Curious...
4660115
That part was already pretty good, but this nearly made me spittake:
4659177
4659482
4660153
I don't think she's shown any outward sign of liking mares, apart from telling Flutters, who knows what she's doing when she's staring at AJ... My guess, since Rarity mentioned the Wonderbolts, is that Rarity thinks it's Soarin', maybe? :p
4660947
I can accept that... Still, it must have been quite something to cause a reaction that strong. The only time I ever reacted like that was when my friend became temporarily deaf and misheard everything anyone said in rather humorous ways.
4661386
No, its definitely squirrels.
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/101251/applejack-is-full-of-squirrels
Bahahahaha! I was wondering when this was going to come up. I totally can't wait to find out what exactly it is Rarity made for Rainbow.
Rarity no, Rarity, pls stahp.
Dang it, Rainbow, this is Appledashery, not Raridashity!
I see you couldn't help but poke a little fun at Over a Barrel.
I don't love it much myself...
http://memesvault.com/wp-content/uploads/Nooo-Meme-26.jpg
Everypony is
gaystraight for Braeburn, apparently.Doesn't she have enough ships?
Hold on... I have the perfect picture for this... wait, no! GAH! I lost my "I understood that reference" picture! :<
Lol, poor Rares. XD
8460846
XD
It’s lingerie isn’t it?